Adrian brought Eleanor to a place he used to frequent during his days at the Academy.
Before long, a stew filled with vegetables was served, simmering thickly in its own broth. It had a slightly spicy and tangy flavor — a perfect match for Deln's cloudy and chilly weather.
Eleanor took a spoonful and wrinkled her nose.
"Ahh."
It was the kind of taste that made one crave a shot of soju.
"Good, right?"
"Yeah, it's delicious. The place feels cozy, too."
Eleanor fell in love with it instantly. As if he had expected that, Adrian scooped up plenty of the ingredients and piled them onto her plate.
"Eat up. You'll need your strength to walk later."
Eleanor puffed out her cheeks.
"I don't like walking."
"You really need to fix that. Not exercising is a bad habit."
"I'm not the only one, you know. Other young ladies live like this too."
Adrian replied dryly,
"I don't care how other people live. I'm talking about you."
Why did men always obsess over exercise?
Eleanor pretended not to hear his nagging and turned her gaze to the window. She could see a long stretch of fortress wall along the hill.
Her voice came out in alarm.
"Wait, don't tell me that's where we're going."
"Where?"
"That wall. Don't tell me we're climbing up there."
When a slow grin spread across Adrian's face, despair crossed Eleanor's.
"You promised. You said today we'd do what I wanted."
Her expression crumpled.
Who would've thought he'd want to go hiking?
But a promise was a promise. Eleanor was half-dragged up the hill by Adrian's hand.
By the time they reached the stone path that ran along the wall, she was completely out of breath. Adrian gently patted her back as if to comfort her.
"That's the last of the uphill part."
"If you're lying, I'm rolling you down this hill."
She growled, and — fortunately for him — what lay ahead was a gentle plateau. As her pounding heart began to calm, the view below the wall came into focus.
The entire capital of Deln spread out before them. From the Academy in the north to the great road stretching southward, rows of grayish-brown carriages formed a steady stream.
"Wow…"
"Impressive, isn't it?"
Adrian looked down over the edge, the wind tousling his soft brown hair.
Eleanor nodded slowly. The jumble in her mind seemed to clear away.
"It's a shame the sky's overcast. This place is famous for its sunsets," Adrian said, stretching his arms toward the sky.
"When you stand here, it feels like the heavens are pouring right down on you. The sunset is so vivid that it stains your hands red."
"Did you come here often?"
"Whenever I felt lonely."
"You? Lonely?"
Eleanor couldn't hide her surprise — he'd always seemed surrounded by friends. Adrian shrugged.
"Being around people doesn't mean you're not lonely."
He was right.
Eleanor rested her arms on the wall and looked up at the sky. If she had entered the Academy as planned, she thought she might have come here often too.
I wonder if Kaidel ever came here.
The thought crossed her mind.
Adrian, who had been quietly watching her, finally spoke.
"Ellen."
"Yeah?"
"Did you ever like me?"
Eleanor turned toward him. Adrian's golden eyes wavered faintly.
After a moment's silence, she answered evenly.
"Yeah, I did."
Her lips curved softly.
"You really didn't notice? I thought I made it pretty obvious. You were my first love, after all."
First love.
Adrian's heart sank — softly, painfully.
It was what he'd longed to hear, and yet, hearing it now didn't bring only joy. There was sweetness… followed by a long, bitter aftertaste.
"…I didn't know."
"See? I wasn't the only oblivious one, then."
Eleanor jabbed his side with her elbow — a wordless way of saying don't make it awkward.
"Then maybe it's my turn to be honest," Adrian said with a short laugh.
"You think my first confession was in front of the piano that day, right?"
Eleanor's eyes widened.
"Wasn't it?"
"Remember the night you got ridiculously drunk? I think it was at His Highness the Crown Prince's birthday banquet. We'd fought the day before and weren't even speaking to each other."
Eleanor stiffened and nodded. She didn't remember the night, but she vividly remembered the miserable hangover the next morning.
Adrian's lips curved in a knowing smile.
"Good evening, Lady Everett."
A man shaped like a potato approached Eleanor. He was the third one that night Adrian had seen come up to her.
Normally, she wouldn't have paid him any mind. Eleanor tended to quietly slip away whenever strangers approached her.
But the Eleanor who was thoroughly drunk was a little different.
"Hi! Wow, you've really slicked your hair back. I wanna press it."
She reached for the man's oil-soaked gray hair. His face flushed red at her touch.
"I… wanted to make a good impression on you, my lady."
"On me? Why?"
Her voice dripped with playful sweetness. The man stammered, half entranced.
"I—I've always thought you were beautiful. If you'd permit me…"
Enough.
Adrian's patience snapped. There was no point in watching further. He strode over in long steps.
"Excuse us."
He slipped an arm around Eleanor's waist and guided her toward the terrace, his gaze sweeping the man from head to toe — a silent warning to know his place.
Thankfully, the man wasn't persistent. Adrian yanked the curtain shut with a sharp motion.
"Wow, you're really handsome," Eleanor said, leaning against the railing and gazing at him. It seemed she didn't even recognize who he was.
Adrian frowned.
"How much did you drink, exactly?"
"You know you're handsome, right? Hm?"
She tilted her head back and forth, eyes unfocused. His expression softened despite himself.
Her praise melted him like butter. There was a twinge of self-disgust… but pride won out.
"Do you have a girlfriend, oppa?"
Oppa, huh.
Adrian stared at her, speechless. Then, deciding to humor her drunken nonsense, he played along.
"No."
"Why not? You must have some problem."
"You're my problem, drunkard."
He gave her head a light, harmless flick. She just giggled.
"Can I get your number?"
"…Number?"
What number?
"Wait, where's my phone? My phone! Did I lose it? No way… I can't… my installments…"
Muttering nonsense, Eleanor glanced around before collapsing forward — right into Adrian's arms. She was fast asleep.
His face twisted in disbelief. He clenched his teeth.
"The next time you drink, I'm not letting it slide."
He half-carried her out of the hall and into the carriage.
When the carriage jolted over the cobblestones, Eleanor stirred, her lashes fluttering open. A dark, damp patch of drool marked Adrian's shoulder.
"Lian…?"
Well, at least she recognized him now.
He sighed.
"Finally awake?"
"No."
Eleanor let her head drop back onto his shoulder.
"Do that again — get that drunk outside — and you'll regret it."
"Why? What did I even do?"
"You smiled like an idiot while potato-faced men were hitting on you."
Eleanor chuckled.
"Oh, that. Let them. I'll have to date and get married someday, right? I'm already thirty… wait, how old am I here, again?"
Adrian grimaced. Whatever good mood he'd been in vanished instantly.
Date? Marry? Those potato-faced idiots?
"No. I won't let that happen."
His answer came sharp and certain. Eleanor lifted her sleepy eyes and met his.
"Why not?"
Her clear green eyes reflected his face — bright and transparent.
His gaze, by contrast, was murky. At some point, he'd lost the ability to look at her with the same untainted innocence.
"Because…"
For a long time now, Adrian had wanted her — not as a friend, but as something more.
He'd never had the courage to show it outright, not when Eleanor saw him only as her closest friend.
It was cowardly, but he didn't want to give up the small privileges that came with being her friend — her warmth, her laughter, her hand.
But tonight, for some reason, he wanted to say it. He felt like he could.
"Because I like you."
His voice echoed softly through the carriage. His hands clenched tightly atop his knees.
"I've liked you for a long time, Ellen."
No answer came. Adrian lowered his head to check her face.
She was sound asleep.
"…Ha."
The strength drained out of him. A strange mix of emptiness and relief washed over him.
"You really had to fall asleep now, huh."
Maybe tonight just wasn't the right moment. He murmured under his breath and closed his eyes.
"Let's hope that's not your answer, Ellen."
Eleanor bit her lower lip, glancing nervously at Adrian. Even after hearing his words, she couldn't remember any of it.
Adrian nudged her elbow lightly — telling her not to feel bad.
"You remember the next day, though, right?"
"Yeah. You asked how much I remembered."
"And you said not a thing."
Adrian smiled faintly.
"I believe you now, but back then I couldn't tell. Didn't know if you really didn't remember… or if you didn't want to. That's why I left — just like you said, leaving behind a short note."
Only then did Eleanor understand why he had suddenly disappeared for months without a word.
"I tried to live without thinking about you," he said. "Just like you're being careful now, I didn't want to ruin our friendship."
After a long pause, Eleanor asked softly,
"Did it help?"
"Of course not."
Adrian shook his head slowly.
"The moment I saw you again, I realized — all those months were nothing but a waste."
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