1. Qi-Yun's Definition of "Warm-Up" Should Be Illegal
Ne Job braced himself as Qi-Yun—the First Auditor, founder of the entire Audit Corps, and apparently part-time execution enthusiast—gestured at a floating sheet of parchment the size of a house.
"This," Qi-Yun said calmly, "is the Paper Guillotine."
Ne Job squinted.
"It looks like someone enlarged a tax form and then gave it trauma."
Qi-Yun nodded with grim satisfaction. "That is an accurate description."
The parchment trembled like an offended jelly monster. Rows of tiny square boxes filled themselves in, spelling:
> PROCESSING CANDIDATE FOR TERMINATION
EST. WAIT TIME: 4 SECONDS
Ne Job panicked.
"Wait time for WHAT?!"
"Evasion trial," Qi-Yun replied, already stepping aside.
The Paper Guillotine dropped like a divine guillotine made of bureaucratic hatred.
Ne Job screamed—
jumped—
and barely avoided being flattened.
The guillotine missed by a hair and carved the floor into a perfect rectangle. The cut glowed bright white, then erased itself from existence.
Ne Job stared.
"…It DELETES the things it cuts?!"
Qi-Yun: "Yes."
"That's HORRIFYING!"
"Yes."
Ne Job pointed angrily.
"That thing fails every safety inspection!"
Qi-Yun's eyes twinkled with ancient menace.
"Correct. That is the point."
The Paper Guillotine rose again, humming like an angry photocopier preparing violence.
Ne Job inhaled.
This was going to be a long day.
---
2. Qi-Yun, Proud Founder of Bad Ideas
"Why is this the FIRST test?" Ne Job yelled while rolling out of the way of another deletion-swipe.
"Because," Qi-Yun said, walking alongside him with the serene pace of someone observing a tourist attraction,
"an Auditor must think quickly.
React immediately.
And not die before lunch."
Ne Job ducked as the guillotine swooped horizontally.
"YOUR training method is highly questionable!"
Qi-Yun raised one brow.
"And yet you are still alive."
"That's because I'm arguing instead of learning!"
"That is also traditional."
Ne Job groaned.
Qi-Yun gestured and the environment shifted: shelves folded, gravity tilted, and suddenly Ne Job was sliding downhill toward the guillotine like a bowling ball toward a paper shredder.
"WHYYYYY—"
"Adapt," Qi-Yun said simply.
Ne Job slammed his hands onto the ground, friction-sliding to a stop inches before the blade.
The guillotine descended.
Ne Job rolled left.
It sliced the floor where his head had been.
"QI-YUN, I AM A MINOR–ISH INTERN! THIS IS ILLEGAL!"
"No one audits the First Archive," Qi-Yun said.
"I can do whatever I want."
Ne Job sobbed internally.
---
3. A Hint of Power
After twenty near-decapitations, Ne Job gasped for air.
Qi-Yun finally raised a hand.
"Enough."
The Paper Guillotine froze in mid-air.
Ne Job collapsed to his knees.
"If this is your warm-up," he wheezed,
"what's the real training like?"
Qi-Yun smiled gently.
"I kill you."
Ne Job screamed internally.
Qi-Yun gestured again and a second parchment unfolded beneath Ne Job—this one circular, like a seal.
Ink rose from the floor and swirled around him.
"Your resonance," Qi-Yun said, "is incomplete. The Archive recognizes you as an Unfinished Record. But you are also something else."
Ne Job blinked. "Uh… dangerous?"
"Unpredictable," Qi-Yun corrected. "Which is worse."
The swirling ink shifted—
forming images.
Ne Job with a black-and-silver coat.
Ne Job wielding a blade made from shredded laws.
Ne Job standing atop a mound of defeated paperwork.
Ne Job gulped.
"Is that really me?"
"Potentially."
"Potentially like… 5%? Or like 80%?"
"Potentially like 102%," Qi-Yun said.
"That's not even mathematically—"
"Potential."
Ne Job shut up.
Qi-Yun placed a hand on the swirling ink.
The visions shattered like glass.
"You cannot become that version," Qi-Yun said, "without learning a truth."
Ne Job straightened instinctively.
"What truth?"
Qi-Yun's eyes sharpened.
"Interns die." Pause. A beat.
"Repeatedly."
Ne Job threw his hands up.
"I KNEW IT!"
---
4. The Temporary Death Mechanism
Qi-Yun snapped his fingers.
A sigil formed beneath Ne Job's feet.
Silver-white.
Spinning.
"What is that?" Ne Job asked nervously.
"The Temporary Death Mechanism."
"That name SUCKS."
"I did not ask for feedback."
The sigil spun rapidly.
"So… how temporary are we talking?" Ne Job asked.
Qi-Yun shrugged.
"You will revive after approximately—"
Ne Job braced himself.
"—six hundred years."
"QI-YUN NO."
"Ah," Qi-Yun added, "but time flows differently in the Archive. To the outside world, it will be moments."
"So inside I'm dead for SIX CENTURIES?!"
Qi-Yun thought.
"Give or take."
Ne Job grabbed the Auditor by the robe.
"I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED MY INTERNSHIP!"
"That is precisely why you must die," Qi-Yun said calmly. "Death dissolves all preconceptions. All fear. All hesitation."
"BUT I WANT TO KEEP SOME HESITATION!"
Qi-Yun raised a finger.
The sigil brightened.
Ne Job panicked.
"W-W-WAIT, WAIT—IF I DIE, WHAT DO I EVEN LEARN?!"
Qi-Yun answered simply:
"The secret of the Audit Blade."
The sigil pulsed.
"And the cost of wielding it."
The sigil flared.
"And what you will owe the universe afterwards."
The sigil erupted upward.
Ne Job screamed—
"Oh COME ONNNNNNN—"
White light swallowed him whole.
---
5. Death #1: Welcome to the Void Queue
Ne Job blinked.
He stood in a white void.
A sign hovered above:
> "WELCOME TO THE TEMPORARY AFTERLIFE."
"TAKE A NUMBER."
CURRENT SERVING: 0000000000000002
Ne Job looked at the ticket in his hand.
> NUMBER: 14,382,991
He screamed.
"THIS IS AN AFTERLIFE RUN BY CUSTOMER SERVICE??"
Behind him, a cosmic being wearing a vest labeled "VOID QUEUE STAFF" said:
"Sir, please remain calm. Estimated wait time is—"
The being tapped their glowing tablet.
"—five hundred ninety-nine point seven years."
Ne Job stared.
"But… I don't even get a chair?!"
"No, sir. This is a standing queue."
Ne Job screamed again.
The cosmic employee offered him a pamphlet.
> "So You Just Died (Temporarily): A Quick Guide"
Page 1: "Scream. This is normal."
Page 2: "Do not attempt to unionize."
Ne Job sobbed.
"This is the worst training arc ever."
---
6. Qi-Yun Waits
Back in the Archive, Qi-Yun sat cross-legged among the ink stars.
He opened his ancient ledger.
Turned to a blank page.
Wrote:
> Ne Job — Death #1: In progress.
Predicted reaction: screaming.
He nodded.
"So far, accurate."
The ink stars pulsed—aware, listening, perhaps amused.
Qi-Yun glanced at the doorway where Ne Job vanished.
His voice softened—barely:
"…Let us see what you become."
---
END OF CHAPTER 185