Chapter 183 — Training Begins With Your Death (Temporarily)
Qi-Yun didn't look like the first Auditor in the history of existence.
He looked like someone who could audit existence itself.
Seven feet tall, clad in a robe stitched from rejected case files, hair tied in a severe knot, and carrying a ledger so massive it could double as a siege weapon.
Ne Job took an instinctive step back.
"H-hello," he managed. "I'm Ne Job. Intern. Professional panicker."
Qi-Yun's eyes flicked down at him—unamused, unimpressed, un-anything.
"You breathe too loudly."
Ne Job blinked. "Uh. Sorry?"
"You apologize too loudly."
"…Sorry—?" He stopped. "I MEAN—"
Qi-Yun raised a finger.
Ne Job shut up so fast the air made a suction noise.
The Archivist floated beside them, parchment face serene.
"Mentor verified. Candidate accepted."
Qi-Yun clasped his hands behind his back, posture military-crisp.
"Ne Job. Before we begin, I must assess your current level."
Ne Job nodded nervously.
"Okay. Um. Beginner? Below beginner? Pre-beginner?"
Qi-Yun didn't answer.
He simply moved.
One step.
Then he struck.
A palm forward, faster than a falling star.
It hit Ne Job square in the chest.
---
1. Ne Job Dies (Mostly)
Ne Job's world inverted—first up, then sideways, then inside-out.
He felt his spine question its life choices.
He saw his entire internship flash before his eyes:
Signing forms. Filing forms. Being yelled at for misfiling forms. Being yelled at for breathing near forms. Being yelled at for existing near forms.
Then—
CRACK.
His soul popped halfway out of his body like a cork escaping a badly-shaken bottle.
"GHHHHHH—WHAT—WHY—WHAT—"
He collapsed onto the Archive floor.
Qi-Yun stood over him, expression unchanged.
"You died."
Ne Job wheezed. "I—DID—NOT!"
"Your soul left your body by 47%. By Audit standards, that counts as deceased."
The Archivist floated closer and nodded.
"This is correct."
Ne Job slapped a hand on the floor. "WHY was that necessary?!"
"Assessment," Qi-Yun said.
"OF WHAT?!"
"To verify you are weak."
"I COULD HAVE TOLD YOU THAT FOR FREE!!"
Qi-Yun ignored the yelling.
"Stand."
Ne Job attempted to stand.
Failed.
Made a noise like a stressed accordion.
Eventually crawled upright, clutching his chest.
Qi-Yun placed both hands behind his back again.
"Good. You survived the first strike."
"FIRST?!"
The Archivist whispered: "There are traditionally nine."
"NINE?!! WHAT AM I, A PIÑATA?!"
"Do not worry," Qi-Yun said. "Only four are lethal."
Ne Job stared at him.
Qi-Yun clarified:
"Usually."
---
2. Introduction to Audit Style
Qi-Yun pointed at the floating shelves.
"Everything in this Archive follows three rules."
Ne Job wheezed. "Okay. I like rules. They keep things from… killing me."
Qi-Yun gave him a look.
Ne Job coughed.
"I mean, hopefully."
"The three principles of Audit Combat," Qi-Yun intoned, "are as follows."
A book flew off the shelf, opening itself into glowing diagrams.
Ink rearranged into silhouettes demonstrating each form.
Audit Principle One — Observation
A figure stood completely still while a storm of blades whirled around it.
"See everything," Qi-Yun said. "Do nothing. Let reality show its first mistake."
Ne Job nodded.
"Like waiting to see which customer complains first during a lunch rush?"
Qi-Yun stared.
"…Yes."
Audit Principle Two — Correction
A figure snapped its fingers. The storm of blades reorganized themselves neatly into a stack.
"Reality always has typos. Fix them."
"I'm bad at typos," Ne Job muttered. "I once corrected 'form' to 'worm' and unleashed a plague of paper serpents—"
Qi-Yun raised a hand.
Ne Job shut up.
Audit Principle Three — Judgment
The figure stamped its foot.
The entire universe around it rearranged into order.
"Judgment," Qi-Yun said, "is the act of forcing reality to accept your correction."
Ne Job blinked.
"…So if a monster attacks me—"
"You judge it."
"If a god is angry at me—"
"You judge them."
"If a coworker says I breathe too loudly—"
"You judge yourself."
Ne Job deflated.
The Archivist patted him sympathetically with a parchment limb.
---
3. Yue POV — Outside the Archive
The Void Storeroom grew colder.
Yue stood at the sealed threshold, fists clenched.
Ling leaned on her glowing bat. "He'll be fine. Probably. Maybe. Okay honestly? Let's just say he won't die permanently."
"That is not comforting," Yue muttered.
Bao sat cross-legged on the stairs, flame dim but steady.
"He's with Qi-Yun," Bao said. "If anyone can fix that boy's resonance, it's the First Auditor."
"I still hate it," Yue said.
Ling nodded. "Same."
Taiyi sauntered in with a steaming cup.
"Anyone want tea? It's calming. Technically. It may contain something that bites—"
"No," Yue and Ling said simultaneously.
The floor rumbled.
Not the Archive.
Something deeper.
Bao frowned, flame sharpening.
"That's the first Vein shifting."
Yue's blood chilled.
"Why?"
Bao exhaled.
"Because Ne Job's existence is changing."
---
4. Back Inside — Qi-Yun's Impossible Lesson
Qi-Yun extended his hand.
A pen appeared in it—the shape simple, ancient, elegant. Its tip glowed with a soft white flame.
"This is an Auditor's Pen."
He offered it to Ne Job.
Ne Job reached for it.
The moment he touched it—
It exploded.
Not with fire.
With paperwork.
Stacks—hundreds, thousands—burst out like a volcanic eruption of terrible, terrifying bureaucracy.
Sheets plastered Ne Job's face.
Forms wrapped around his arms.
A stack pinned him to the floor.
"BLRGRH—ACK—WHY DOES IT SMELL LIKE MY WORST MISTAKES—"
"The Pen tests you," Qi-Yun said calmly.
"IT'S TRYING TO KILL ME!"
"Then it has identified your weakness."
Ne Job tore at the forms. "MY WEAKNESS IS—PAPER?!"
"Yes."
Ne Job screamed.
Qi-Yun paced in a slow circle.
"Every Auditor must master their greatest fear."
"WHAT IF MY FEAR IS EVERYTHING?!"
Qi-Yun paused.
"…Then we will be here for a long time."
Ne Job finally heaved himself up from the pile, hair full of forms.
He glared at the Pen.
It floated in the air, humming with disapproval.
Ne Job jabbed a finger at it.
"LISTEN HERE, YOU JUDGY LITTLE WRITING STICK—"
The Pen crackled.
Qi-Yun spoke without looking.
"Do not insult the Pen."
"WHY?! WHAT WILL IT DO?!"
"It will file a complaint about you."
Ne Job froze.
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
NO!!
Not a complaint. Anything but that.
Ne Job gulped, bowed, and whispered through gritted teeth:
"…Sorry."
The Pen calmed.
Qi-Yun nodded approvingly.
"Good. You have completed Lesson One."
Ne Job blinked.
"That was a lesson?!"
"Yes."
"What did I learn?!"
"That you are easy to intimidate."
Ne Job screamed internally.
---
5. Training Begins in Earnest
Qi-Yun snapped the ledger open.
"Lesson Two."
"Please be gentle," Ne Job whispered.
"No."
A page flipped.
Symbols glowed.
"Strike me."
Ne Job blinked. "What?"
"Strike me," Qi-Yun repeated.
Ne Job hesitated. "But you're—uh—made of muscles and ancient authority and disappointment."
"Strike."
Ne Job took a stance.
Raised a fist.
And punched.
Qi-Yun didn't move.
Ne Job's knuckles hit his palm.
Time froze.
Pain blossomed.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—"
He collapsed again.
Qi-Yun sighed.
"Your form is atrocious."
"It's not a form," Ne Job wheezed. "It's just me trying not to die."
"Then die better."
Ne Job curled on the ground. "I'd like to go home."
"You cannot."
"Why?"
"Because you have just begun to remember."
Ne Job froze.
"…Remember what?"
Qi-Yun didn't answer directly.
Instead, he tapped the ledger.
A ripple spread across the Archive.
Shelves shifted.
Lights brightened.
A memory—Ne Job's—unfurled in midair like a projected scroll.
A ten-year-old boy writing desperately into a burning ledger.
Ne Job's eyes widened.
"That's—"
"Yes," Qi-Yun said. "The memory they erased."
Ne Job trembled.
Qi-Yun spoke quietly—almost gently.
"You were not simply erased.
You were archived."
Ne Job swallowed.
"Why?"
"Because you were born with an Auditor's resonance."
The Archivist bowed its head.
"Uncontrolled. Unrecorded. Unforgivable."
Ne Job's knees buckled.
"So… what do I do now?"
Qi-Yun turned away, walking deeper into the shifting shelves.
"You follow me."
"Where?"
Qi-Yun's voice echoed like a judge calling a sentence.
"To the section where your erased fate was stored."
Ne Job followed.
Unsure.
Frightened.
But… determined.
For the first time, he wasn't running from the truth.
He was walking toward it.
---
End of Chapter 183