"Goodnight mister" ivy whispers, closing her eyes drifting off to sleep.
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"Ye goodnight kid" I muttered
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I closed my eyes.
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"Boo!"
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"Ack?! Who are you, where are we?"
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"Good evening, young man. It appears we find ourselves within the realm of your dreams."
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"Dream?"
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"Most certainly." Replied the floating woman with long, dark hair.
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"What kind of sick joke is this?" I looked around, up down, left right, finding myself trapped in a black void with her.
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(Yk. Let's just say si hon Looked around *cry*)
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"Mark me well, young man I do not speak in mirth. I warn you misfortune shall befall ere long" she intoned, her voice a low bell of warning.
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Speechless, Si Hon laughed softly. "That's cool... So I'm trapped here with a Victorian naked ghost girl who's warning me about a tragedy in the near future?"
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"Uhh… f-for your information, young man, I am not a ghost! And secondly, I did not come here to-to amuse you with laughter or idle jest!" declared the mysterious woman, her voice trembling with restrained anger.
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"Oh… oh wow. Well, I'm terribly sorry, flustered young ghostly miss. I didn't mean to make you mad~" I said, mimicking her tone and bowing slightly, my voice dripping with playful teasing.
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This dream is really weird, lol. (Shit I'm so good)
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"Y-you! If you tease me once more, I shall go and you'll be left without a warning of what's to come in the near future!"
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"A-and how dare you mimic my tone?" the mysterious girl exclaimed, fuming in the most adorably indignant way.
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I couldn't help it her puffed cheeks and trembling glare were just too much. A laugh escaped from me before I could stop it. "Pfft"
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"You! You're laughing again!" she cried, stomping one delicate foot against the nothingness beneath us. Ripples spread through the darkness like waves on a glass.
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"Well, sorry," I said between laugh, raising my hands in surrender. "You're just… really bad at being scary."
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Her eyes widened, then softened with irritation. "You are insufferable," she muttered, crossing her arms as her form began to flicker faintly.
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"Wait hey, don't vanish on me now!"
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"Perhaps next time you'll learn to listen," she whispered. Her voice grew faint, before she faded completely leaving me alone in the endless dark.
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"Oh, my, god!" I sigh and sat down.
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"Well this is a pretty damn weird dream" I muttered
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"Hmm, Perhaps next time you'll learn to listen." I said copying her.
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I sat there, blinking into the emptiness. "...lol. Guess she's gone."
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A long pause. (Okay guys it's a long pause like 6 or 7 minutes.)
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"You're supposed to wake up now, idiot."
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"Wha?!" I spun around. There she was floating upside down, arms crossed, glaring at me with that same pouty face.
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"Wait huh. You're still here?!"
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"Obviously. You didn't even try to wake up!" she huffed. "Do you think dream portals close themselves?"
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"I… don't know? I don't even know what dream portal is. And I don't usually get tutorials from angry dream ladies"
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She sighed dramatically, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Mortals."
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"Ghosts," I muttered back
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"I heard that!" she snapped, flipping upright in midair with an indignant glare. "Now listen carefully, young man. This realm operates under the law of,"
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"Wait, wait, wait. There are laws in dreams?"
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"If you interrupt me one more time, I swear I'll-"
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"Sorry, sorry! Continue, Your Royal Ghostliness."
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She froze mid-sentence, cheeks puffing as a faint blush on her pale face. "I-I am not royal, and I told you I am not a ghost!"
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"Right, right. Of course Totally not a ghost. Just a mysterious floating woman haunting my REM cycle."
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"You're impossible!" She cried, throwing her hands up. "As I was saying, this realm operates under the law of emotion." Whatever you feel most strongly becomes real here."
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"So… if I imagine, a pizza…"
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Poof! Whoosh!
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A hot pepperoni pizza appeared between them, floating in midair.
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"Oh... Ivy"
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'Poof! a sleeping ivy appeared, then disappear.
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She blinked. "You must be joking, and what was that!"
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"Hey, the law of emotion likes pizza and just forget the last one" I said, already reaching for a slice.
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"Unbelievable," she muttered, pinching the bridge of her nose again. "The fate of your reality may depend on your dreams, and you summon food."
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"Hey, at least I didn't summon you."
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"WHAT?!"
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"Exactly, I didn't summon you."
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"You must be joking"
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"I guess..."
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"You know what? Just forget about it." I grabbed the floating slice, steam fogging in the blackness, and took a bite. "See? Practical applications."
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Before she could answer, the pizza shuddered. The pepperoni slid off like tiny red moons and began to orbit my head. The crust curled into a ribbon and tightened into a loop that looked suspiciously like a crown.
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"Oh no," she whispered, eyes wide. "That's not"
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The darkness hiccupped. A chorus of muffled laughter echoed from nowhere, then the sound snapped into a high trill like a broken music box. The edge of the void folded in on itself and painted curlicues of smoke that smelled faintly of oregano and old paper.
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"You did this," she accused, pointing one translucent finger with theatrical horror. "Your levity is destabilizing the realm!"
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"huh? Wait what wdym uh? Me? I just ate a slice." I shrugged, mouth full. "It's the pizza's fault for being dramatic." (it's like si hon don't get what she's saying)
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The orbiting pepperoni's aligned and, to my surprise, they arranged themselves into letters. They spelled "W-A-K-E U-P."
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Her face went pale as moonlight. "That-that is impossible," she stammered. Her elegant composure collapsed into frantic flutters. "I have not i did not intend"
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"Okay, okay," I said, standing and trying to look suitably heroic. The crown-crust fell from my head and flopped. "Look, princess, if this dream is breaking because I made a joke, I'll fix it. How do we uh reverse a dream?"
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She pinched her brow, thinking. "Concentrate. Breathe. And for heaven's sake stop being amused."
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"Stop being amused?" I blinked. "That's the cruelest sentence anyone's ever given me."
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Her cheeks flushed a soft, furious rose. "For once, show me you can be serious!"
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I tried. I closed my mouth, folded my arms, and summoned my most solemn expression. It lasted precisely three seconds before a small, guilty grin got out.
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She threw up her hands in exasperation and then impossibly, the crumbs gathered into a neat little broom and swept themselves toward me. "Fine," she said through clenched teeth, "then sweep."
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"Sweep?" I looked at the broom, at my grin, and then at her. "You do realize I'm a terrible cleaner."
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"Do it, or I shall."
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"Or you shall what? Fade completely and leave me with a pizza shaped prophecy?" I grinned.
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Her reply was a half laugh, half growl. "I will haunt you properly later."
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I took the tiny broom. As I swept, the dream, slowly the chaos like thread, and the orbiting pepperonis politely fell back into their place on the crust. The darkness smoothed out into a black, less hungry now and oddly satisfied like a room that had just been tidied by two very unwilling roommate... (Housemates? Gng I need help)
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Si hon sigh. "Okay, crisis averted. Guess that's one less cosmic pizza problem to deal with... Shit that's corny"
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The woman blinked at me, brows knitting together. "Cosmic… pizza?"
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"Yeah, y'know. Like... oh." I froze mid-sentence.
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"What?" she asked, tilting her head.
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"Wait a sec." I rubbed the back of my neck. "Why do you talk like you stepped out of a Shakespeare play, and I sound like I came from a group chat?"
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She frowned. "A… what chat?"
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"Exactly!" I said, gesturing wildly. "That's what I mean! I'm speaking normal, and you're over here saying things like 'I do not speak in mirth!'"
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She blinked again, utterly lost. "I simply speak as I always have. Perhaps it is you whose tongue is strange."
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"So what, this dream's got subtitles or something?" I muttered. "Is there like… a translation patch I missed?"
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She sighed, pressing a hand to her temple. "You truly are a confounding creature."
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"Thanks" I said, smirking. "I get that a lot."
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(Damn I just noticed that I'm getting good with English On this journey. Nvm I take it back. I can only do it in text and not on real life).
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4am Yea bro I gtg sleep. And i shall publish thy CHAPTER today
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