" Why did you call me now ?," I was confused . I was just trying to call my friends . Why did he have to call now ?
" You.....you called me ."
" Oh ," I realised .
We were silent for a while and then he asked ,* Are you alright ?"
" Yeah , yeah ."
" Where are you right now ?"
I did not exactly know the address or the name of the place .
" Um , by Gengen river - "
" Yeah , where exactly?"
" Between sky and concrete," I was getting more confused , myself , but when I gazed out the river stretched from horizon to another , the sight made me feel immediately better ," I guess it's somewhere nice ."
" Wait , I am coming ."
" Why ? How ?"
But he had already put off the phone . He could not possibly know where I was . Unless ...unless ...
My thought process was destroyed as my phone rang , I picked up seeing Summer's name .
" Why aren't you at the dorm ?," she started scolding me immediately.
" Are you back ?," I asked ," How's the trip ?"
" I asked something!"
" Yeah ....it was lonely there , you guys weren't there , I -," I started crying ," I am so sorry , I missed you guys so much ."
" Autumn , listen to me , where are you ? Do you need me to come and get you ?," she asked , with worry dripping down her voice .
" No , I need you to sleep and eat well and lock that fucking door," I sobbed ," What if something happens to you ?"
" Why would anything happen to me ?"
" Cause you are pretty !"
" You are drunk !"
" Yeah , I am drunk ."
I admitted it . But I was sane enough to understand everyone around me was either living me or getting hurt in some way .
" I am just so worried ," I took in a shaky breath ," I did not mean to hurt you guys or our group in anyway . It's just my life is getting insane and I don't have any fucking idea what to do ,but I am still trying my best ."
" Listen. .. ," Summer took in a shaky breath ," I can't lie to you but I had watched the vedio when it went viral , I mean , probably whole nation watched it but I watched it too . And that made me realise that I was just glad that you are here with us ."
" Summer ," I called her name hopefully.
" But don't expect me to forgive you ," she said ," You know about my family, don't you ? My mother is a street vendor and my father , well , he is just barely alive in a hospital ward . With the money I am earning , I have to send my three siblings to school . The oldest now has to take too many private tutors cause she is preparing for college exam and now , I have to keep a housekeeper twenty four hours for my siblings and mom . I have to plan their college funds , their marriage , their own apartments and future surgeries for my father . I want to buy my mother beautiful cosmetics cause her hands have gone rough for working her whole life . And after everything....I still have to now worry about how long I can keep up my career with the things going on in our team . If it disbands....or when it disbands , I have to make sure that I have a steady income to support my family. Do you know how anxious I was thinking the agency might also ask me to pay fine with you ? I , I understand that you went something so horrible but I am also trying to survive here ."
Yeah , I understood her .
She had left home and fought tooth and nails to debut .
" I am sorry about that ," I whisphered.
" No , don't apologise, it makes me look bad ," she said ," You might not have heard it but the agency is planning to disband us next year when our contract ends . Unless we have a huge comeback, it's going to be over for us ."
I closed my eyes and let the tears fall.
It was so hard to get at the top but so easy to fall down .
" What do we do now ?," I asked her .
" I don't know , honestly," her voice trembled ," The best we can do is take care of the things at our hand . Prepare for a last fight , but we have to talk about it ."
" I guess so ," I told her ," I will see you tomorrow."
" Yeah , see you tomorrow."
I cut off the phone and sat down on the bench again .
The alcohol was already leaving my system , so I took another sip . I wanted to get drunk . Being sober was too much heartbreaking for me.
I scrolled through my phone to see if Rain had messaged me . But she did not .
Even with hundreds of well-wishers in insta ,I felt diavastatingly lonely tonight.
When I closed all tabs , my screen still glowed with the picture of a shadow . It was Liam's, I had taken it secretly during the time I had been with him at home while I was still trying to walk.
Mostly we would not be allowed to keep such a picture on wallpaper but since I still had not started to work properly I had kept it .
I opened a secret folder that I gad set password in my phone . A single picture was there .
It was my wedding photo . That time I liked it so much but now looking at it ,was hurting me.
Jerk , the jerk who broke me the most .
I fisted my palm and hit on my chest to stop the aching pain. I missed him terribly . I missed him enough that I could imagine him start talking to me from the picture .
The way he would usually scowl and scold me for unnecessary things like -
" Why are you wearing such things clothes when it's so cold outside?"
Exactly, exactly like that . I was so drunk that I could even hear his voice .
" Julia ?"
I groaned , squeezing my eyes shut . I blamed the alochohol most for this hallucination .
Then I felt cold fingers pressed on my cheek . The touch was soothing . Like I just had a fever , and someone had put cold compress on my forehead.
" Are you alright ?"
There he was ..kneeling before me . He wore an emrald green hoodie, mask and a black cap under which his blue eyes glowed like pretty gems .
I leaned in and kissed him on his mask .
Warm breath and mint scent drenched me . I flinched. It was too real to be a dream.
" You need to sober up ," Liam's voice sounded like he was annoyed.
It was like someone had splashed cold water on me . He was real..I had called him here .
He had probably seen me crying over our wedding picture . While I had acted chill infront of him , about our breakup , I acted like a nagging child and drunk called him.
This was too much humaliating.
I stood up and started walking .
" Julia ?," he followed," Where are you going ?"
I could not face him now . Not when he had witnessed how pathetic I actually was .
" Go back , I am fine ," I told him as coldly as possible.
" Yeah ? But wait , why are you staying here ?"
" None of your business."
" Julia , look at me ."
" Get lost !"
" Why are you running ?"
" I am not !," I quickened my steps , why couldn't he just let me be ?
I ran down the stairs and looked up to see him following me in a pace faster than mine .
I shrieked and ran down the corridor and outside the building - in my brother's tshirt and shorts , with towel wrapped head .
I looked ridiculous but I could not care less about it .
" Julia ! Stop , if you fall , you will get hurt ," he called me out .
" Just stop chasing me !,"why was I running ? Why the fuck I had thought that running was a brilliant idea ? I did not know ! But now that I was running , stopping would be more awkward.
If Liam stopped chasing me , I could just take a lap around the block and come back .
I looked back and saw a blur of green hoodie and blue jeans rushing at me .
My heart jumped on my throat and I started running twice faster than before .
" JULIA STOPP !"
" GAAAH! STOP CHASING MEE!"
The ground under my feet suddenly vanished as my world turned upside down . It took me a second to realise Liam had caught me and he was carrying me like a sack of rice on his right shoulder.
I was defeated .
I was mortified .
" Put me down ," I told him , hiding my face behind my palms .
" Not until I get some answers ," he replied .