"Yes. I want you to forget me." Xue Liulan forced the words out. He watched the light fade from Murong Jin's eyes, and his heart clenched. He turned away, unable to bear her disappointment.
She was his weakness. Always had been, always would be.
Her shoulders trembled. Her hands hung limply at her sides. Her gaze was fixed on his profile, unmoving.
"Xue Liulan, do you hate me that much? If you hate me, why not just forget me yourself?" She reached out, her hand grazing his sleeve before falling helplessly.
"Do you think I don't want to?" He spun around, gripping her shoulders. "Do you know how many nights I sat here, obsessed with our past, replaying every moment?"
"I…" She stared at his handsome face, so close, so tormented.
"I knew you weren't dead. I knew you were nearby. But I couldn't go to you." He let go, stumbling back.
"You knew?" She gasped. Xiangjue mimicked death perfectly. No pulse, no breath. How could he know?
"Yes." He gave a self-mocking laugh. "Before Murong Yan took you, I leaned close. I smelled the Xiangjue. My brother died from it. I know that scent better than anyone."
He had let her go.
She felt suffocated. She thought her death would free him, let him heal and forget. Instead, her deception had flayed him alive.
"Then why let me leave?" She asked tentatively. He had once sworn never to let her go.
"You used death to escape me, Murong Jin. I knew how desperate you were. Why would I force you to stay?"
"Did you ever think that if you asked, I would have stayed?" She stepped toward him, staring into his eyes.
He looked down at her, then turned away. "I knew. But you wouldn't be happy. I don't want you to give up your freedom for me."
"So you endure the pain alone? You lied about taking Danxi?"
"Only then could you leave with peace of mind." He walked to the window, opening it a crack. Morning light streamed in, gilding his profile.
She stared at him, dazzled. It felt like a dream.
She walked up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist, resting her head on his tense back.
He stiffened, then turned, pulling her into a fierce embrace.
"I decided to let you go. Why did you come back?" He buried his face in her neck, his voice muffled.
"Could you really bear to let me go?"
He shook his head slowly.
"Then why ask me to take Danxi?" She punched his back lightly. "If I took it, I would forget you. Forget everything. 'Xue Liulan' would be just a name to me."
"But you would be free." He kissed her forehead. "I am trapped in longing. I didn't want you to be trapped too."
He knew she couldn't let go. He had burned the painting, feigned indifference, yet she still risked her life for him.
"Murong Jin, you are a fool." He sighed, then laughed.
"How am I a fool? You forgot to tell Xiazhi to be silent." She pushed against his chest, looking up at him.
"If the news leaked, Siyou would be the first to suffer," he said, smiling. "So you volunteered?"
"Yes. Few of the Fifteen could do it. Xiazhi needs her strength to help you."
"Did you consider what would happen if you were caught?" His eyes narrowed dangerously. She never learned.
"I wouldn't let him know it was me."
He frowned. He knew the Vermilion Bird Camp's protocol.
"You planned to ruin your face and commit suicide. A faceless corpse. No proof." He gritted the words out.
She nodded matter-of-factly.
He swept her up into his arms. She gasped, looking at his gaunt face. Her heart ached.
"You made me worry for nothing. Shouldn't you compensate me?" He sat on the bed, settling her on his lap.
She smiled, then looked up sharply. "Why were you there? And at the same time? Don't tell me you went for a walk after dinner."
"In your eyes, am I such an idle Emperor?" He laughed. "I was distracted when I gave Xiazhi the order. I forgot to mention the silence. When I remembered, it was too late. I knew you would go."
"Because failure would ruin your plans, you knew I wouldn't sit by?" She rolled her eyes. "You know me too well."
He looked at her tenderly, then pressed her down onto the bed, kissing her neck, her lips. He kissed her for a long time, reluctant to let go.
"Your heart for me is no less than mine for you. If our positions were reversed, I would have done the same. So, I knew you would go." His eyes were soft as water.
She touched his face and laughed.
From hearing of his danger to deciding to kill for him, she hadn't hesitated. When love became instinct, longing was a cage no one could escape. Only by his side was she truly free.
The doors of Zhaoyang Palace were shut tight, hiding the lovers' reunion. Equally shut were the gates of Prince Cheng's manor.
Guo Shangzhong stood before the eight corpses, face livid. He turned the jade ring on his thumb.
"How is Prince Cheng?"
"Shocked stupid, but alive," a eunuch reported.
"Mm." He turned to Guo Wei. "Well?"
"Throats slit by a fast sword. So fast they didn't bleed immediately."
Fast sword? Guo Shangzhong was surprised. Few in the jianghu had such skill.
"Who?"
Guo Wei thought for a moment. "Probably him. The best swordsman in the dynasty. Gongzi Suyi."