"What a beast..."
Nifuji rubbed his face with cold water so many times, or rather, he decided to take a bath directly with a cold shower, to wash away all the desire that would lead him to hell.
Hell.
He felt that this was the place where he would be when he passed away.
After all, it was obvious, if he were to go to heaven, despite what he had done, then what was the point of being a good and loyal man, right?
Still, let's not continue with this conversation, as he was afraid that he would continue with his nonsense, but he forced himself to think so, thinking of the consequences of his action when he passed away, so that way, he could stop himself from being a beast, or even masturbate while thinking of his mother-in-law's figure.
This was wrong, he thought, yet when he looked at her back at that time, thinking about how her delicate back would lean forward, letting him enter her soaked vagina, where her two daughters had come from, it made it impossible for him to think that he could enter heaven.
"Oh God... Nifuji, how much have you fallen...?"
Previously, he was still nervous about women, and he didn't know whether his love would be appreciated, yet now?
Why did he make one woman after another so easily?
He didn't really want to; he wanted to stop, yet he knew well that he would become a hypocrite if he really said all of that.
However, it also felt wrong to somehow admit that he was a pervert and just went after one woman after another like a beast.
If he really did so, what was the difference between him and an animal?
The reason why humans are different from other animals is that we have reason and we can determine what is wrong and what is right.
So, was it right or wrong of him to think lewd thoughts about Tsukiko, who was practically the mother of Hina and Rui?
Logically, it wasn't wrong since even if Tsukiko was the mother of Hina and Rui, she was a woman before anything else. She wasn't chained with blood by him, and if he had no relationship with Hina and Rui, they were practically strangers, or rather, they were just strangers!
Was it wrong for a man to be attracted to a charming older woman?
Or rather, even a certain president also married his own teacher, who was as old as his mother, so how could he not do the same, right?
Yet, morally, it was wrong, as the society had judged that it was immoral of him to feel such a feeling toward the mother of his two lovers, and even if he had parted away from them, or even didn't know them, the fact that an older woman would be together with a younger man would already cause a scandal!
And, more importantly—
"Can I take care of her?"
When Nifuji thought of this question, he couldn't help but fall into a deep silence, thinking about how irresponsible he was.
Tsukiko wasn't young; she was old, and sooner or later, she would become even older. Instead of wishing to get pregnant, she wanted to see the faces of her grandchildren more often.
Yet, Nifuji also knew that humans needed three things in their lives, which were food, sleep, and sex.
Even though Tsukiko had grown older, her needs in that area were definitely still active, and while it could be suppressed by stress and all the other things, it still existed!
Or rather, if she was stressed, then the feeling of sex would be even crazier, as it was like she would forget about everything. Yet he also knew that when everything was done, and the dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins vanished, Nifuji knew that what was left was just guilt and self-loathing, like how one felt when they finished masturbating, as the warm water washed over them.
It felt like they had done something unforgivable, somehow.
Though in many cases, some people didn't feel that, yet in the end, everything just depended on the culture and the values of someone.
Nifuji knew that he was still old-fashioned and conservative despite how he had been playing around with many women, yet he sought exclusivity, and like the ancient men, who wished for their women only for themselves, this is how he felt toward his women, despite how selfish it was.
However, at the same time, he also knew how wrong it was for him to feel this way toward Tsukiko, who was practically a mother figure, or rather, a mother for both Hina and Rui!
"Having two sisters is already bad enough..."
Yup, just having Hina and Rui by his side would already cause a scandal, so if he added Tsukiko, then what would happen?
It would become the hottest news of the generation, yet somehow, he also could imagine that no one would blame him, since many men had a similar fantasy to his, and this attraction was healthy, considering how the three of them were all adult women.
Still, he knew well that while Hina could forgive him with Rui, it was definitely impossible if he did it with Tsukiko.
Even if he felt a certain conspiracy like Hina tried to pull Rui into his harem, no sane person would send their mother to his harem, right?
Nifuji took a deep breath, clearing his mind, which made him also feel relief, thinking he should forget what he was thinking.
Yes, Tsukiko might be able to trigger his system, yet even so, there was something that one should do and shouldn't do.
"When I leave this bathroom, nothing will happen. Everything is okay. I will be a good son-in-law."
Nifuji, who had dressed up, as he wanted to go to his office right away, so that way, he could escape this chain of immorality, breaking away from his fate, chanting those words so many times in front of the mirror before he closed his eyes, and made a fire up gesture, then left the bathroom, but—
"...what are you doing there, Tsukiko-san?"
Nifuji was in a daze when he saw Tsukiko standing on the stool as she tried to reach the shelf.
"Ah, Nifuji-kun, I am about to—"
Nifuji quickly reacted and moved as fast as possible to catch her, and he had to say, when he felt the softness of her buttocks on his palms, it was damn hard for him not show any reactions.