— — — — — —
"Is it really over? So the promise has finally been fulfilled…" Kevin let out a long breath of relief at the news. His whole body seemed to loosen, and at the corner of his eye, a single tear slipped down without him realizing. "...Rest in peace... all of you."
"Good, Honkai is finished. That means the only thing left to consider is…" Otto's face showed no surprise. His gaze shifted ever so slightly toward the two women standing nearby.
Kallen and Sakura had thrown themselves into each other's arms the moment they heard the news, overjoyed and utterly ignoring Otto's presence.
"I swear, I've got three words in my heart right now… but I don't know if I should say them out loud." Otto's face darkened, his gentlemanly patience evaporating into thin air as he stared at the two of them.
"Hey, Mophead," Tesla said, tilting her head, "what do you think we should do with Anti-Entropy now? Maybe I should start a Mech delivery service. You think that'd work?"
"The cost of building a mech is about ten million," Einstein replied calmly. "One meal order costs ten at most. After electricity, rent, and labor, you'd earn maybe two a pop. That means a mech would have to deliver five million orders just to break even. You'd die of old age before you ever saw a profit. Conclusion: you've got money to burn and nowhere to put it."
"…You—!" Tesla's face went bright red. She very nearly reached for an explosive to take Einstein down with her.
"Can you two not argue for one day?" Planck sighed from the sidelines. Those two couldn't go a day without bickering; if they did, they'd probably suffocate.
"Either way, I'm against the whole mech delivery thing. Besides, after this battle, our mechs are basically all scrap metal." Welt chimed in, chuckling. The end of Honkai had released the tight string in his chest, and he couldn't even bother worrying about those machines anymore.
"Well, they were going obsolete anyway. Might as well use this chance to build something even better," Einstein said matter-of-factly.
"Fair point," Tesla admitted with a shrug.
"Yo-ho! Everyone, let's head to the guild and throw a party!" Garp suddenly appeared, grinning ear to ear.
"No objections here." Welt agreed with a smile.
"Great, then it's settled. I'll go round up the others." Garp laughed and trotted off.
...
Soon after, when the world at large heard Honkai was truly over, countless people broke down in tears—crying, wailing, and pouring out years of bottled-up pain.
---
Later, in the Dimensional Guild's grand hall, all members were throwing their very first party.
"Cheers!"
Everyone laughed, clinking glasses filled with all kinds of drinks while bragging and talking nonsense.
"Edward!" Garp called out between gulps of booze. "Listen, if I hadn't slowed down on purpose 'cause I didn't wanna make you cry, you'd have lost way earlier. Those two Herrschers? I wouldn't even need three seconds to finish them off."
"Tch. You?" Whitebeard scoffed. "You've got it backwards. Three seconds? Please. If I got serious, not even one second. Just a glance and they'd be done."
"I don't even need a glance. Just standing there, I'd shake them to death!" Garp bragged shamelessly. The crowd booed in unison.
"Are these guys' IQs in the negatives?" Einstein muttered, rubbing her temples as the boasting flew left and right.
"That's just how they are," Rimuru said with a smile, sipping fruit juice.
"Wait, why aren't you drinking? Allergic to alcohol?" Roger asked, shaking his bottle at Rouge with a playful grin.
Rouge shot him a look that made him lower it right away. "You're not allowed to drink like before. Set a good example for our son."
Garp overheard and perked up. "Oh? My grandson's almost here already?" He glanced at Rouge's belly with a goofy smile.
Whitebeard laughed his booming laugh. "Gurarara~ You mean my son."
"You two… fuck off." Roger's face darkened. "There's no way either of you are getting near Ace. And especially you, Garp. Grandson? What, you want me to call you 'Daddy' or something? Forget it. Ace has his own family now, so the both of you can go fuck yourselves."
Garp's expression fell, but a second later he lashed out with a kick at the person sitting next to him. "Useless brat! I want a grandson of my own. Go make a Luffy now! No—give me three Luffys!"
Dragon sat stiffly, not knowing what to say. In the end, he just stood up and moved farther away from his father.
...
"Rimuru-chan, are you really allergic to alcohol?" Himeko asked while drinking.
"Nope. I just don't like the taste," Rimuru replied, happily sipping juice.
"That's a shame. You'll never know the beauty of a fine drink." Himeko shook her head, then downed another huge gulp.
"Himeko, don't drink so much!" Theresa scolded, exasperated at the sight of her guzzling.
"C'mon," Kiana giggled, hugging Theresa from behind. "It's a rare day to celebrate—just let Himeko enjoy herself."
"Ugh. And when she passes out, guess who has to pick up her workload for the next few days?" Theresa grumbled, glaring at Himeko.
"Work should go to the capable, right?" Himeko said breezily, patting Theresa on the shoulder, earning herself a series of furious eye-rolls.
...
Meanwhile, on the other side of the hall, Roger and Otto were having a hushed conversation.
"You're telling me you actually have a way to make Kallen fall in love with me?" Otto asked, suspicious.
"Of course! Look into my honest eyes—do I look like the kind of man who lies?" Roger said with a face that practically had "con artist" written on it.
"Hard to believe you," Otto deadpanned.
"Don't be like that. Hear me out. First, Kallen likes Yae Sakura. Sakura's a woman. That means Kallen doesn't like you, because you're a man. So far so good?" Roger explained.
"…And your point is?" Otto felt an ominous chill run down his spine.
"My point is, it proves Kallen's into women. And since you're not a woman, she's not into you." Roger leaned in.
"…So what am I supposed to do?" Otto asked cautiously, already feeling himself being dragged into dangerous territory.
"Glad you asked!" Roger pulled a little bottle of glowing liquid from his pocket. "Behold! A rare item I spent ten thousand crystals to roll—'The Fountain of Genderbending.'"
"…You're suggesting I turn into a woman?!" Otto's eyes widened in shock.
"Brother, let me ask you—do you love Kallen's body, or her soul?"
"Her soul, of course," Otto answered instantly. If it were just her body, he could've made dozens of artificial clones by now.
"Exactly. Then what does it matter if you're male or female? They say heterosexual love is for reproduction, but same-sex love—that's true love. Drink this, and Kallen will finally understand the depth of your feelings." Roger's tone was persuasive, almost seductive.
"…When you put it that way… it almost makes sense," Otto muttered, wavering.
"Come on, drink it! With one sip, Kallen will be yours." Roger's eyes gleamed with wicked delight. At last, someone had taken the bait. Whatever happened after? Not his problem. And guild members couldn't hurt each other anyway—what could Otto do to him?
Otto, oblivious to Roger's scheming, stared at the bottle in turmoil.
"Drink it. Then Kallen will love you," whispered a voice in his heart, with the image of Otto's angel.
"For god's sake, just drink it already! Quit dawdling!" yelled another, Otto's devil.
"Fine, give it to me. I'll think it over." Otto's eyes blazed with determination. He snatched the bottle from Roger's hand and hurried off toward his room.
"No way. He's not actually gonna drink it, is he?" Welt, who had been eavesdropping, was stunned.
"Pfft—Roger, you bastard, that's one hell of a scam!" Veldora roared with laughter.
"Can you believe how easy that guy was to fool?" Roger stroked his beard proudly, watching Otto's retreating back with a hint of admiration. "For love, he's even willing to turn himself into a woman. Now that's a real man."
"I don't even know what to say anymore…" Rimuru's mouth twitched. Looking at this crowd of lunatics, he had the urge to kill every last one of them.
(…God, this is so stupid, but also hilarious. Now I kinda wanna write the follow-up story of Otto and Kallen after this whole mess. Haha, screw it—I'll play the devil.)
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