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I didn't watch the DVD the next day, Saturday, or Sunday. I woke up and thought about it again. Even if I thought something was suspicious, there were some things I shouldn't watch. I tried to resist the urge to watch. My wife works hard for the family, making breakfast and cleaning every morning. Looking at her, I felt incredibly guilty for having such feelings.
The following Friday, my wife picked me up from the station for the first time in a while. While she was driving, her cell phone rang. I wasn't driving, but she pulled over to the side of the road to answer the phone. "Yeah, yeah, see you tomorrow!" she said and hung up. A friend was coming over tomorrow, so they decided to meet up. She asked me to drop her off because she was going out for drinks.
The next day, I dropped her off around noon. The kids were out that morning. Now alone at home, I was once again curious about the DVD. I could watch it as much as I wanted now. Of course, that would mean my wife wouldn't know. I still felt guilty. But if I watched it now, I could watch it without her noticing. In the end, I went to the car to get the DVD and brought it back.
The one I watched the other day was labeled "1." Today, I'd start with "2." I picked up the DVD and inserted it into the player. I took a deep breath and pressed play. Just like last time, it was an image file. I played the first image. It showed a woman in a swimsuit. Looking at her face, it looked like the same woman from the DVD I saw the other day. The last time, she was fully clothed, but this time she was in a swimsuit. She wasn't young, but she had a nice figure. Her poses changed slightly, so I really didn't know what the DVD was for, but they were all photos of the same woman in the same swimsuit.
I skimmed through all of the nearly 100 files. I wondered if she even took off her swimsuit in "3"? If so, I was all the more interested. Since each DVD-R only holds around 100 images, I'm sure they're spaced out accordingly. I played DVD "3." This time, there was a video file. I played it. A different woman appeared on the screen. A beautiful bed, perhaps in a hotel room, was reflected on the screen. She appeared to be in her late 20s, wearing beautiful clothes. The cameraman's voice was heard, and the woman posed accordingly.
After filming her entire body, a man's voice said, "Let's get naked." The woman then removed her dress and was left in her underwear. Then, with her underwear removed, she was completely naked. She posed in various ways and was photographed. Was this a pornographic film or something? What kind of DVD was this? From the looks of it, it seemed like someone had filmed a video file and burned it onto a DVD, but why did my wife have one? Then, as if filming was over, the screen showed the hotel wall, with the camera still rolling. I fast-forwarded, but the wall remained visible until the very end. Unexpectedly, I got an erection. It wasn't a typical pornographic film; rather, it felt like footage from before it was edited into an adult film.
DVDs "4" and "5" were locked and unviewable. I played DVD "6." The same woman was on screen, but I was shocked to see her face. Just like in the DVDs I'd seen before, my wife was sitting in a chair in a hotel room. My heart started beating faster, and I felt short of breath. It was as if the air in the room had vanished, as if I'd forgotten how to breathe, and my body was so hot I could hear my pulse pounding. I hastily pressed the stop button on the DVD.
I stared blankly at the floor. I felt like I was losing track of the situation. I lost track of what I was doing. After a while, I regained my composure and was able to reconsider what I'd been doing. Why was my wife on the DVD? Based on what I'd seen so far, was she going to get undressed? I didn't want to see what would happen next. But I had to. Or maybe I wanted to see. I didn't even know what my own feelings were.
I continued to watch the screen, driven by inertia. Like the other DVDs, my wife on the screen was posing in time with the voice of a man who seemed to be the cameraman. Then I heard words I didn't want to hear. "Let's get naked then." He was telling someone else's wife to take off her clothes…and he was speaking to her in a casual tone…what was this? My chest ached.
I was overcome with the feeling that everything I'd built up until then was crumbling away. As I stared at the screen in a daze, my wife put her hands to the buttons of her jacket and began undoing them one by one from the top. She looked down, embarrassed. "Hurry up and take it off," the man said in a slightly forceful tone.
My wife seemed taken aback and quickly unbuttoned the buttons. She then took off her jacket, exposing her bra in front of the camera. "Look at me while you take it off!" he shouted, a little louder than before. If this were an adult video, this might have been an exciting scene. But what I was watching now was not just any adult. Because the woman on the screen was my own wife. My wife, the mother of my children. I prayed that the woman on the screen was not my wife.
Maybe she was still a similar person. I had no choice but to escape reality.
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