Love is a choice, Sharon said, and I have chosen, she screamed. It was a family and friends meeting, and Sharon had declared a few months prior that she wanted to settle down with Pete. Family and friends were concerned about her choice, hence the meeting. Pete was a lovely, God-fearing, hardworking man with a lot of potential to be great. They had dated for 2 years, and Sharon was convinced he was the one for her. Pete was, however, uneducated with quite questionable manners and speech. He had so many question marks in the eyes of everyone around Sharon. Sharon had it all, not rich but came from a complete family of love, education and open-mindedness. She was educated to the master's level and had intellectuals in her circle. Sharon was a leader in the church and everywhere. She was expected to be hitched to a pastor or a very high-profile person, yet she chose Pete, who was the very opposite of Sharon and everything she had been exposed to. Hence, the meeting, to enable Sharon to see reason. Sharon, on the other hand, was convinced that with God's help, she could work on Pete, and he would be so refined to her level. Pete knew these concerns and was optimistic that he and Sharon could do great things together, just like she was. Sharon and Pete appeared to be in sync at the time. They had similar thoughts and preferences. Sharon felt loved and seen. Pete made himself available to be moulded by Sharon. Sharon even once told a friend that she felt like God created Pete for her, because he was her rock in hard times and made her happy. So Sharon understood that not everyone in the meeting does not sees what I see. To her, they may be different, but they are not. Sharon, listen to the elderly and reconsider her aunt's advice. Sharon was still adamant as she felt she was not understood. Family and friends decided to back her decision eventually, and the two had a beautiful marriage ceremony a few months later. Peter promised Sharon nothing but Joy and laughter. Little did she know that Joy, as she knew it, would have a different meaning, and laughter would elude her.
It's been three months of marriage, and pregnant Sharon sits on the bathroom floor of her and Pete's apartment with tears, contemplating whether she made the right choice. They say marriage is not a bed of roses, but for Sharon, it seems every day and everywhere is filled with thorns. This is not the marriage she anticipated. Sharon was blessed with pregnancy shortly after marriage, and she expected so much joy and togetherness in the journey, but so far, it appears she's on the journey alone. Her first trimester has been filled with fatigue and constant vomiting. She expected Pete to be by her side, comforting her, but he is never home, and even when he is, he appears not to care. It was a weekend, which means washing. Sharon gently picks herself up from the floor, gathers her laundry and starts washing by hand while standing because sitting to wash had become uncomfortable. As she washed, she reminisced about how she had anticipated that weekend washing meant her washing and Pete would dry because they always said they would do all things together. Here she was washing everything and going out to dry by herself in her fragile state. It's been only three months, why so much pain, Sharon thought to herself. Where did she go wrong? What did she do wrong? She was sure she was going to do life with the love of her life, but it appeared Pete had nothing but hate for her based on the way he treated her. Happy thoughts, Sharon, Happy thoughts, the baby needs an emotionally healthy you, she said to herself. As soon as Sharon finishes with her washing, she continues with her house chores, which include cooking and cleaning and getting ready for bed. Pete arrives home around 9 pm. As soon as Sharon hears the main gate open, she quickly rushes into bed, whether sleepy or not, because she wants to avoid having a conversation with Pete, which would likely end up in verbal abuse or tears for her. She had resolved within her heart a few weeks ago to avoid him as much as possible for the sake of her unborn baby. As such, Pete would come back and find her asleep. She needed the rest anyway, so she slept. In the middle of her sleep, she feels a cold and hard body press against her back and butt. She is frightened at first but regains her composure and allows herself for penetration. After all, Pete would be done in a few minutes. Before marriage, Sharon swore she would never have a boring sex life. In reality, her sex life is sour. No discussion, np communication, no plans, no prior excitement, doesn't matter if she's interested or not, ready or not, Pete wants sex, Pete gets sex. A woman is trained not to sexually starve her husband. So she must satisfy him.
Weekdays for Sharon meant waking up early for work, sometimes with Pete's assistance of dropping her in town, and most times without. She took care of most of her financial needs and those of the house by herself. She was often off by 6 am and would return by 8 pm. On one of the days, Sharon is awoken by sharp pain in her abdomen. She screams hysterically at the sight of blood in her bed, and Pete rushes her to the hospital. After hours of sleep because she was sedated, Sharon regained consciousness. Her eyes open to the sight of her mother and Pete by her bed, as well as a man whom she presumes to be a doctor.
How are you feeling the doctor asked. Sharon forces a smile and nods her head. I am so sorry, Sharon, you lost the baby. Sharon did not scream, for she suspected and had already done enough screaming. She looks at her mum, who is trying her best to console her. Sharon closes her eyes, and tears flow silently. Minutes pass, and Sharon has still not uttered a word.
Pete, on the other hand, though in a lot of pain, is not sure what to make of his wife's reaction. He's doing his best to be strong for her, but cannot tell if she's in shock or traumatised or is going through an episode because Sharon is just lying down, eyes closed, with subtle tears flowing down her cheeks now and then.