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Chapter 2: My Stupid Brother
Ron's brother? If they were actually related, he'd probably be as gorgeous as Ron, right? Penny thought dreamily. If she couldn't land the older brother, maybe the younger one would work?
For the handsome guy she'd just met and that generous ten-dollar tip, she decided to do Ron a solid. After all, it was just one suitcase—how much trouble could it be?
Ron climbed into a muscle car and followed in the direction the handsome guy in black had driven off.
Ron Cooper.
Yes, as expected—another traveler between worlds.
When he first arrived in this reality and was held by a beautiful woman who called his name, he momentarily thought he'd stumbled into the world of Harry Potter.
That is, until he realized he had only one brother, and nobody in his family had red hair. More importantly, he was absolutely certain his mother cooked on a regular gas stove, not with magic.
He was finally convinced this was a completely normal family. Based on newspaper clippings and other evidence, he tentatively concluded he'd somehow traveled to America sometime in the 1980s or 90s.
Years passed with this assumption, but the longer he lived here, the more things felt... off.
First, there was the neighbor's wife getting her son fitted with leg braces.
When his mother Mary brought it up over dinner, he learned that the slow-looking kid was actually named Forrest Gump.
On TV, the sensational murder trial of banker Andy Dufresne ended with his sentencing to life in Shawshank State Penitentiary—news that had the Cooper family cheering around the dinner table.
Everything felt strangely familiar to him.
This continued until his mother gave birth to twins: Missy and Sheldon.
Seeing the uncanny intelligence that often flickered in baby Sheldon's eyes—wisdom far beyond his years—Ron realized he'd stumbled into a world where TV shows and Hollywood movies were real.
So the unassuming, seemingly dim kid next door would one day become a chain restaurant mogul and Apple shareholder? Who would believe that?
Ron mulled this over as he walked to the neighborhood park, where all the other kids were playing—except for that weirdo Sheldon.
Okay, maybe it wasn't nice to call his own brother a weirdo, but Ron genuinely had no patience for that pompous little brat. In comparison, sweet little Missy was adorable.
In the small park, several older kids were picking on the slow... well, the special kid from next door.
Honestly, Forrest Gump was one of Ron's favorite movie characters. His sense of justice kicked into overdrive, and he yelled, "Leave that kid alone!"
Although he still ended up with a black eye, even a year's age difference made a huge gap in fighting ability at that age.
But Ron was ecstatic anyway. Not just because he'd saved his favorite movie character, but when little Forrest Gump said, "We're best friends now," a mystical voice echoed in his head.
"Congratulations, Host, for earning the friendship of Forrest Gump, your first story character. System officially activated. Host receives Forrest Gump's gift: Endless Endurance (60 miles, 45 pounds of gear—run 'til you drop. If I can do it, so can you. Hooah!)"
From that day forward, Ron opened the door to an extraordinary world.
Ron tailed the other car from a safe distance for about three miles. The vehicle turned onto a deserted side street, and finally, the most classic scene unfolded.
A black sedan appeared out of nowhere, complete with a police light bar on the roof, sirens wailing.
"Vehicle in front, pull over! Show me your hands!"
The handsome guy in black complied immediately.
"Good, now open your door, put your hands behind your head, and slowly back toward my vehicle..."
Two armed FBI agents emerged from their car, weapons drawn like they were facing public enemy number one, cautiously approaching to cuff him to their vehicle. Ron knew it was time for his grand entrance.
"Hey there, boys, playing cops and robbers?" Ron stepped out of his car with an amused grin.
Both armed agents immediately swiveled their weapons toward him, but their hostile attitudes evaporated the moment they recognized Ron.
"Damn it, Ron, this is an FBI operation. You IRS guys need to stay in your lane."
"Investigation? Your FBI idea of investigating is street theater with your own people?" Ron glanced at the handsome guy in black spread across the car hood. "Isn't that right, Detective O'Connor?"
The two agents quickly scanned the empty street and relaxed once they confirmed no civilians were around.
The slightly balding agent sighed. "Ron, I think you're confused. This is a suspect we're investigating. He just happens to look like someone you might know."
Ron shrugged. "Fair enough. I don't really know the guy that well anyway. I just wanted to share some intel about a drug dealer operating under the codename 'Heisenberg.' I figured you wouldn't mind, right?"
He whistled and nodded pointedly toward Detective O'Connor, still positioned against the car hood.
"Alright, can we discuss this in the vehicle? Tanner, get our suspect in the car. You two take the back seat," the balding cop said with resignation, looking at Ron. "You ride shotgun."
"Are you still upset about that sperm bank incident?"
"No!"
Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, holders of PhDs in theoretical physics and experimental physics respectively from Caltech, trudged dejectedly up their apartment building's stairwell.
Just minutes earlier, they'd been planning to contribute to humanity's intellectual advancement while earning some extra cash to upgrade their home internet to premium fiber-optic service.
But at the crucial moment, Sheldon had predictably chickened out.
"This constitutes genetic fraud!" Sheldon protested.
Leonard looked up helplessly. "It was your idea in the first place!"
Sheldon continued his tirade. "Consider those unfortunate women who place all their hopes in my genetic material, only to produce offspring incapable of basic calculus or understanding differential equations. How would they feel?"
"I'm sure they'd love their children regardless."
"Well, I wouldn't!" Sheldon shot back. "Just look at my sister and me—we share virtually identical chromosomes, and she's merely a restaurant server."
Indeed, in Sheldon's view, his other three siblings were nothing more than mouth-breathing simpletons with no appreciation for scientific elegance or proper respect for intellectual achievement.
Even Ron, despite having a slightly higher IQ, seemed to Sheldon like a recently evolved primate—just marginally more aggressive than the others.
Leonard had just reached their front door and was fishing for his keys when he noticed the apartment across the hall had its door open. The previous tenant had been replaced by an elegant blonde woman organizing her belongings.
"New neighbor?" Leonard's eyes widened, frozen in place as if struck by lightning, mesmerized by the beautiful legs beneath the newcomer's denim shorts, his mouth going dry.
Sheldon shrugged dismissively. "Obviously."
"Definitely an upgrade from the last guy."
"If by that you mean—"
Sheldon's commentary continued, but Leonard's attention had completely wandered, deaf to whatever his roommate was saying.
"Maybe we should be neighborly," Leonard suggested. "You know, invite her over for lunch or something."
He approached the apartment across the hall. Penny had just finished unpacking and was about to carry Ron's suitcase to his bedroom.
"Hi there, I'm Penny. Just moved in," she said with a warm smile.
"Hi, I'm Leonard, and this is Sheldon. We're your neighbors from across the hall."
"Neighbors?" Penny's eyes widened as she searched both faces for any resemblance to Ron, trying to figure out which one might be his brother. She came up empty.
Both guys looked painfully ordinary—basically indistinguishable from the science nerds she'd encountered in college. They were nothing like the devastatingly handsome Ron.
"Um, do either of you know someone named Ron?"
"Ron?"
Sheldon took a defensive step backward. "Are you some kind of government agent Ron sent to surveil me?"
"Ha! My idiotic little brother!" Ron's exaggerated laughter echoed through the hallway, accompanied by approaching footsteps.
"You honestly think I'd use someone who didn't even finish community college as an undercover operative? Seriously, is your IQ actually above room temperature?"
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End of Chapter 2