"When I was in 12th grade, I saw her sitting in a restaurant with my neighbor friend. In that moment, it felt like my whole world collapsed. My heart was shattered, and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I had never felt so broken before.
"I left everything behind and went back to the city. That day, I realized she would never be mine. The pain was unbearable, and I cried more than I ever had in my life. Every tear carried the weight of a love I had lost From that day, the days kept passing by, one after another, but everything inside me changed. Slowly, I started losing interest in everything—my studies, my hobbies, even the things that once made me happy. Life felt empty, as if a part of me had been left behind forever. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't bring back the same spark within me
"Six months had passed. There was a festival in my village, so I decided to go back. But even before reaching there, I was already carrying a storm inside me—I was angry, upset, and still drowning in the shadows of depression. The roads looked the same, the people looked the same, but inside me, nothing was the same anymore."
"That day, I was riding my bike to the village. My mind was so heavy with anger and pain that I didn't even care about myself. The bike was speeding faster and faster, and at least four times I came close to crashing—close to death. But still, I didn't slow down. It was as if the pain inside me was pushing me to ride faster, as if I was trying to escape from my own thoughts."
"When I finally reached the village, I saw her standing outside with her family. My bike was still racing too fast as I entered the street. Her house and my house were right opposite each other, so the moment I arrived, our eyes almost met. For a second, everything around me froze—the noise of the festival, the people, even the sound of my bike. It was just me, her, and the heavy storm of emotions I had been carrying for months."
"As I entered the street, one man shouted angrily at me, abusing me and saying, 'This is not your private road to drive so fast!' Already filled with rage and pain, I lost control of myself. I went straight to him and started beating him badly. My anger exploded so much that his upper jaw was broken. All of this happened right there—in front of her and her entire family. They stood frozen, watching everything, while I stood there burning with anger, my heart still bleeding inside."
"At that moment, someone quickly called my brother, and he rushed out to pull me inside. For a while, I tried to stay calm, but then the friend of that man arrived. He looked at me with rage and suddenly abused me, cursing my mother. That insult was enough to make me lose all control. Blinded by anger, I grabbed a stick and struck him on the head five times. My fury knew no limits. And all this time—she and her family were watching. In their eyes, I was no longer just a boy they once knew, but someone dangerously aggressive, someone they could not recognize anymore."
"A few days later, I noticed that the same neighbor boy had started visiting her house. The sight of it tore me apart from the inside. I stood there, helpless, watching him walk towards her home as if he belonged there. My chest felt heavy, and a deep sadness spread through me. I couldn't stop thinking that maybe he was slowly taking the place in her life that I had once dreamed of. That feeling broke me even more than before."
"It was 2 a.m. when I lay awake, my mind restless. I kept thinking—she knows I love her, but every time she ignores me. The weight of silence was eating me alive. Then one day, there was a big function in the village. I gathered my courage and went there, and the moment I saw her, my heart began to race. That night I made a decision—I would tell her everything. I wanted her to know how, when we were little children, we used to walk to school together. I wanted her to know that from those days until now, my love for her had only grown stronger. I wanted to open my heart completely and tell her that I had loved her since childhood, that she was the only one I had ever truly cared for. My chest was trembling with emotions I had held inside for so many years, and for the first time, I felt ready to let it all out."
"When I finally gathered the courage to tell her everything, my steps felt heavy, but my heart was pushing me forward. I walked slowly toward her, each breath filled with nervousness and hope. Standing just a few feet away, I forced a small smile and said softly, 'Hi.' She looked at me with calm eyes, and for a moment I forgot all the words I had rehearsed a hundred times in my mind. Somehow, I managed to ask, 'What are you studying now?' My voice trembled slightly, because hidden behind that simple question was the ocean of feelings I had carried since childhood. In that instant, I wasn't just asking about her studies—I was searching for a way back into her world "She looked at me and replied with a quiet 'Hi.' But in her eyes, I could clearly see it—she wasn't really interested in talking to me. That realization cut deep, yet I still tried to hold the moment together. With a hesitant smile, I offered her a glass of juice, hoping it might ease the silence between us. My hands were shaking slightly as I held it out, because deep inside I was fighting the fear that she was slowly slipping further away from me."
"Just as I was trying to hold on to that fragile moment, the neighbor boy suddenly walked in between us. I saw her face light up with a smile the moment he arrived—a smile I had been waiting for all along, but it wasn't for me. My heart sank, but before I could even process it, he turned to me and said, 'Hi.' The words got stuck in my throat—I couldn't reply. Then, with a sharp look, he asked, 'Why did you beat that man last week?' His question hit me like a wound reopening, and I felt the weight of everyone's judgment in that single moment. She was watching, he was questioning, and I was left standing there, silent, with my heart drowning in shame and pain."Slowly, I realized that the boy wasn't just asking me a question—he was making fun of me. His tone, his smirk, everything felt like a mockery. In that moment, it became clear that he was trying to show me down in front of her. My chest tightened with anger and humiliation, but even more than that, I felt broken, because she stood there smiling at his presence while I was the one being ridiculed."
"I finally broke the silence and said, 'I think I should leave now.' She looked at me and asked, 'Why are you going so soon? Stay for a while, let's talk.' For a second, I almost believed she wanted me there, but then the doubt inside me spoke louder. I asked her, 'Are you making fun of me?' Before she could answer, the boy smirked and said, 'What do you think?' And then—even she started laughing with him. That laughter pierced through my heart like a blade. I felt humiliated, shattered, and filled with rage. Controlling myself, I said softly, 'I'm leaving… because if I stay here even two more minutes, I might lose control and hurt him.' With those words, I turned away, carrying a storm of pain, anger, and disappointment within me."
"In my mind, I had always believed she was everything to me—the center of my world, my first and last love. But in that moment, when I realized even she was laughing at me, I felt something inside me die. The person I had trusted with all my heart was now making me a joke. My steps grew heavy as I turned to leave, and while walking away, every sound around me faded. All I could hear was the echo of their laughter, cutting deeper than any wound. With each step, I carried the unbearable weight of betrayal and heartbreak "As I was leaving, I accidentally bumped into a man on the way. He recognized me and knew about my temper, so without saying anything, he quietly walked away. But just then, that neighbor boy and she came near me that neighour guy . With a mocking smile, one of them asked, 'Are you hurt?' Then he deliberately pushed me. In that instant, all the anger I had been holding inside exploded. I struck him hard across the face with all my strength. The moment was intense—people were watching, I could see the fear in her eyes as she looked at me. For the first time, it wasn't love or care in her gaze—it was fear
"After that moment, I didn't say a single word. I just turned around and walked away, my heart heavy with shame, anger, and heartbreak. Her fearful eyes followed me, and I knew things would never be the same again. That night, I made a decision—I couldn't stay there any longer. I packed my pain along with my memories and chose to return to the city once again, leaving behind the village, the festival, and the love I had carried since childhood."
"Before leaving for the city, I decided to see her one last time. My heart was restless, and I needed answers. Standing in front of her, I gathered all my courage and asked, 'Are you and that neighbor boy in a relationship?' She didn't say a single word—her silence was louder than any answer. My chest tightened, but I still tried to reach out to the girl I once knew. I said softly, 'Do you remember, in childhood we were good friends? We used to walk to school together.' My voice trembled as I spoke, carrying both the innocence of the past and the pain of the present. But she only stood there, silent, leaving me with memories that hurt more than words ever could."
"Finally, she broke her silence and looked straight into my eyes. Her words cut deeper than any wound: 'You're not the Roshan I knew in childhood. You've changed. The friend I remember was not like this. Now you're aggressive… careless in everything.' Hearing those words, I felt my whole world collapse. The image I had kept of us—the innocent friendship, the childhood bond, the love I had carried for years—was shattered in a single moment. She no longer saw me as the boy who once walked to school with her; she only saw the anger and mistakes that had taken over me."
"I tried to defend myself. With a trembling voice, I told her, 'You're thinking wrong about me.' But before I could say more, she cut me off. Her eyes were firm as she said, 'No, Roshan… you hit people without thinking. You're always angry. This is not who you used to be.' I stood there in silence, helpless, wanting to explain, but she didn't give me the chance. Before I could speak another word, she turned away and said coldly, 'I don't want to talk to you anymore.' Those words felt like a final door closing between us, leaving me broken in a way I had never been before."