Chapter 7
Adrian finally curled up beside him, the rhythm of his breathing slowing as he drifted into sleep. Rian sat on the edge of the bed, staring down at him.
His chest felt tight. Part of him wanted to push Adrian away, yet another part couldn't stop feeling responsible for him.
He exhaled slowly and leaned back, his eyes unfocused. Memories bubbled up unbidden.
Alex…
Rian saw himself years ago, a younger, naïve version of himself. He had just stepped into Alex's house for the first time. Alex had been casual, joking about his mother being a cardiologist who worked late, and bragging about his cooking skills.
"I'm going to prove I'm a great chef," Alex had said confidently. But the kitchen quickly became a disaster. Smoke filled the air, ingredients spilled everywhere, and the two of them ended up laughing so hard they could barely breathe.
"You're really something, you know," he said between laughs. "On a normal day, I would have aced that."
"Hmmm," Alex replied, a teasing smirk on his face.
"Okay, okay, that's enough laughing," Rian said, trying to cover his mouth. But Alex dodged his hand with ease.
Alex had tried to cover his mouth, playfully scolding him, and Rian had dodged, their laughter spilling into a chase around the kitchen. Eventually, Alex had cornered him, still smiling. They had stood there, heartbeats racing, the air between them charged with something confusing and new. Rian had frozen, unsure what to do next, and Alex had looked at him, laughing softly, teasing, close enough to make his chest thrum.
Slowly, Alex removed his hand and leaned in. Rian froze, closing his eyes, heart pounding.
Alex paused midway, and when Rian opened his eyes, he found Alex just staring at him before letting out a low laugh. Rian felt a wave of awkwardness and tried to pull away, but Alex caught him again—this time with a kiss.
Rian was startled at first, then instinctively wrapped his arms around Alex's neck. Alex drew him closer, lifting him onto the table, his lips moving from Rian's mouth to his neck. Rian couldn't help the soft moan that escaped him.
Eventually, they made their way to Alex's room. It was Rian's first time, and everything felt overwhelming and new—but in a way he wouldn't forget.
----
Alex sat in the VIP room of the club, the music pounding through the walls, glasses clinking, and girls dancing around him. Normally, he might have been drawn to all of it—the lights, the energy, the attention—but tonight, nothing interested him.
His eyes kept drifting to his phone. There it was—Rian's picture, he remembered when he first saw his picture on Adrian's phone. He rubbed the screen gently, almost afraid to believe it was real. For the first time in years, the person he had been scared to search for was in front of his eyes, if only in a photo.
Mistakes. Lies. Misunderstandings. Everything that had gone wrong between them—they came flooding back. Yet here was Rian, alive, part of his younger brother's life. Part of a world Alex wasn't in.
The girls danced, laughing and pressing against him, but Alex didn't care. His men, however, were enjoying themselves, oblivious to his distraction, joking and nudging each other as they basked in the VIP treatment.
Alex's grip tightened on his phone. His heart pounded with a mixture of longing and regret. He had lost Rian once, and he wasn't about to lose sight of him again—even if he had to watch from a distance for now.
The world around him faded. The music, the lights, the laughter—all of it became background noise to the one thought that mattered: Rian.
And just like that, his mind pulled him back—
The quiet library, shelves casting long shadows. Rian's breath warm against his lips as they kissed, Rian straddling him on the chair. They broke apart, gasping softly, and Rian's thumb brushed his lips.
"I saw this café," Rian had whispered with a smile, "they serve cakes and pastries… and so many strawberry cakes. We should go together."
Alex remembered how his chest had tightened, how the happiness on Rian's face made him hesitate.
"As… boyfriends?" Rian had asked cautiously, shifting on his lap.
The word had hung heavy. Alex had cleared his throat. "I don't think it's right for us to do that now. 'Boyfriend'… it sounds weird."
Rian's eyes had flickered with something fragile, but he pressed on. "I had a distant cousin… he had a boyfriend. At first people didn't accept them, but later they did. My parents—"
"Rian," Alex had cut him off gently. "That might have worked for your cousin, but it won't for us. Besides… we have a plan, right? After college, we'll move in together. For now, this is enough." He leaned in, pressing a soft peck against Rian's lips. "This is enough."
Rian's protest died in his throat.
"Come on," Alex whispered, brushing a hand through his hair. "Before the security guard catches us."
They stood, straightened themselves, and slipped quietly out of the library.
And just like that, the warmth of that night faded, replaced by the thumping bass of the club. Alex blinked back into the present, his chest heavy with an ache he couldn't quite name.
---
The next morning, Rian had called the school to excuse himself, claiming he was sick. After hanging up, he stepped into the bedroom.
Adrian stood by the mirror, frowning as he struggled with a stubborn button on his shirt. Rian walked over quietly and without a word, reached to help him. His fingers brushed Adrian's, the silence between them heavy but not hostile.
When the button was finally done, Rian muttered, "Come on, let's go. I already called the doctor." He turned to leave.
But before he could take a step, Adrian's arms slipped around him from behind, holding him tightly. His voice, soft and almost childlike, trembled as he whispered, "I'm sorry… You're angry."
Rian sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. Slowly, he turned in Adrian's hold and looked at him. "I have every right to be angry."
"I know." Adrian's gaze didn't waver. "I'll make it up to you."
Rian shook his head but didn't push him away. "Come on, let's go. We don't want to be late."
They left the house together, the air between them still charged with unspoken feelings. Once inside the car, Rian took the wheel, and the two of them drove off into the city—each lost in their own thoughts, yet bound by something neither could deny.