The camera blinked on with a faint ding. For once, the background wasn't a creepy graveyard, decrepit house, or demon-haunted street. Instead, viewers were greeted with a bland white office corridor lined with motivational posters that hadn't been updated since the early 2000s.
> [Stream Chat]
🟢 Moonfang: "Where's the haunted vibes?? This looks like my dad's insurance company."
🟢 GoblinSlayer96: "Is this the true horror arc: capitalism?"
🟢 Hexxie: "ngl cameraman's hoodie doesn't fit the dress code lol"
Ethan adjusted the camera on his shoulder and deadpanned, "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the most terrifying dungeon of all—corporate management."
Behind him, Seraphina was already striding forward in her heels, every step echoing against the linoleum floor. She was in full witchy glam mode: velvet coat, violet streaks glowing faintly in her black hair, silver rings that glimmered with faint enchantments.
The poor receptionist nearly swallowed her pen when the witch slammed a glittering contract onto the counter.
"Seraphina Nightveil. Your bosses summoned me," she said flatly, voice carrying enough force to send a chill down the air-conditioned hall.
The receptionist squeaked, "Y-yes, ma'am, right this way."
---
Conference Room of Doom
Ten minutes later, Ethan was filming a long oak table where four suits sat stiffly, pretending they weren't staring at Seraphina like she might hex them on the spot.
"Miss Nightveil," said the bald man in the center, pushing up his glasses. "We at StarRise Streaming Inc. are very excited about your growth metrics. Your… let's say, unique content, has driven engagement beyond our projections."
Seraphina crossed her legs, smirk curling. "You mean the part where I actually fight monsters while everyone else just screams at shadows?"
The woman in a navy blazer coughed. "Yes. That part."
Ethan zoomed slightly, catching Seraphina's sharp smile. "That's because I'm authentic."
> [Stream Chat]
🟢 DarkCoffee: "AUTHENTIC LMAOOO she just turned a demon into a lawn ornament last week."
🟢 SimpyMage: "Queen behavior. Corporate drones quaking rn."
🟢 Zyxx: "Meanwhile cameraman still the MVP—look at that stable zoom."
---
Just as the bald man leaned forward with a carefully rehearsed speech about "brand partnerships," a faint creeeak echoed from above.
Ethan's head tilted. His instincts buzzed.
In the next instant, a heavy fluorescent light fixture broke free from the ceiling with a metallic screech. The suits gasped. Seraphina reached for a spell.
But Ethan? He simply took one step to the side—camera still rolling—just as the entire fixture crashed onto the chair where he'd been standing seconds before. Dust flew everywhere.
He didn't flinch. Didn't pause. Just panned the camera smoothly toward the wreckage and muttered,
"OSHA violation, episode one."
> [Stream Chat]
🟢 Moonfang: "BRO DIDN'T EVEN BLINK."
🟢 GoblinSlayer96: "Cameraman has Ultra Instinct confirmed."
🟢 Hexxie: "Light fixture: 0. Cameraman: 9999."
Seraphina didn't even look surprised. She just flicked her wrist, the dust vanishing with a sparkle. "He's fine. He always is."
The suits, however, stared at Ethan like he was some kind of urban legend walking around in human skin.
---
Eventually, after much throat-clearing and awkward laughter, the contracts were signed. StarRise officially secured Seraphina's channel with a lucrative partnership deal.
As they walked back out into the corridor, Seraphina leaned closer and whispered, "You realize your casual 'don't-die' trick is half the reason people keep watching, right?"
Ethan shrugged. "I'm just doing my job."
"Yeah," she smirked. "And breaking the internet in the process."
The stream faded out with chat spamming memes about Ethan's invincibility, already flooding social media with new edits: "Cameraman vs. Gravity – Gravity loses."