Ding——
Congratulations! You've snatched a red envelope from Daoist Duobao and obtained a Marrow-Cleansing Pill. It has been stored in your Treasure Chest.
Ding——
Congratulations! You've snatched a red envelope from the Lord Tongtian of the Three Realms and obtained the Divine Talisman of "Mixed Yuan One-Thought Technique". It has been stored in your Treasure Chest!
"Whoa! A triple kill! And even a red envelope from the Lord Tongtian! This is awesome!!!"
As the phone notification chimed, Chen Xiaobei jumped up in excitement.
Lan Mengchen frowned, feeling another surge of dissatisfaction.
She had advanced him 35 million yuan, and he hadn't looked this happy.
Was snatching a lousy red envelope worth a few cents really enough to make him jump for joy?
Lan Mengchen pouted, her beautiful big eyes glaring at Chen Xiaobei in annoyance.
Yes, you read that right!
The goddess Lan was jealous—jealous of a red envelope!
No matter how hard she racked her brain, she could never imagine the terrifying value of what Chen Xiaobei had just snatched.
The Lord Tongtian was one of the Three Pure Ones, on par with the Supreme Lord Laozi and Yuanshi Tianzun.
Moreover, among the Three Pure Ones, the Lord Tongtian was the most arrogant, often pulling off audacious and awe-inspiring feats.
His red envelopes never disappointed!
Sure enough,
The frantic flurry of red envelopes suddenly stopped. In its place, the group was flooded with messages of envy and jealousy.
Peacock King: F**k! Who snatched the Jade Sage's "Mixed Yuan One-Thought Technique"? (N shock emojis)
Lord Tongtian of Heaven: No way! The Sage even gave out the "Mixed Yuan One-Thought Technique"? Is he planning to take a disciple?
Erlang Shen: Why didn't I get it? Why!!! (Three crazy emojis)
Bull Demon King: What bad luck! I missed such a divine opportunity! I really want to be the Sage's disciple! (Three teary-eyed emojis)
Pagoda-Bearing Heavenly King: Who is Chen Xiaobei? This luck is 逆天(unbelievable) (heaven-defying)! (Three wide-eyed emojis)
Earth God: @Chen Xiaobei, future great deity! Is there still room by your side? Begging to cling to your 大腿 (thigh, slang for "powerful person")!
Celestial Soldier: Great deity! Begging to cling to your leg hair! @Chen Xiaobei
…
Staring at the flooding messages, Chen Xiaobei broke out in a cold sweat.
Clearly, he'd really snatched a super red envelope this time! It had even blown up so many great deities!
Worst of all, their attention was now fully focused on him.
As the saying goes, Fame brings trouble, just as fattened pigs get slaughtered!
If his identity was exposed, he'd be kicked out of the group in seconds!
But just as he feared—disaster struck!
Ding——
Ding——
Ding——
His phone started buzzing like crazy again, flooded with friend requests from all sorts of ghosts and monsters!
Chen Xiaobei's heart raced. He felt like his good days were over.
"I need to fortune-tell… let's do a fortune first!"
Chen Xiaobei took a deep breath. Luckily, he had a trump card up his sleeve, so he wouldn't panic completely.
"Good omen! Great fortune!"
After counting on his fingers, Chen Xiaobei immediately felt relieved.
His fortune-telling skills were top-notch.
If it was a good omen, what was there to fear?
"Mengchen, come, let's eat."
Chen Xiaobei grinned, tossed his phone aside, and let those guys make a fuss.
"Hmph!"
Lan Mengchen huffed in feigned anger.
Chen Xiaobei wasn't stupid. He knew he'd neglected the campus beauty by focusing on red envelopes.
So he immediately switched to "warm guy mode"—picking up food for her, pouring drinks, and telling funny jokes, balancing humor and cuteness perfectly.
By the end of the meal, he'd finally made the goddess laugh, dispelling her anger.
After paying the bill, they walked back to school together.
The night breeze was cool, the moonlight perfect, and the campus's tree-lined path hummed with a vague 暧昧 (ambiguous) vibe.
"Chen Xiaobei, are we considered friends now?" Lan Mengchen suddenly asked.
"Is that even a question? Of course we are!" Chen Xiaobei grinned, his heart racing as he looked at the goddess's stunning face.
"Would you like to come to my house?" Lan Mengchen asked again.
"Your house? To… do…?"
Chen Xiaobei froze: "Well… of course I'd like to, but isn't this moving too fast? Is that okay?"
Wait,
Had he heard this line somewhere before?
"Moving too fast?"
Lan Mengchen rolled her eyes at him, pouting: "Stop talking nonsense! I mean, I'm inviting you to my grandma's birthday party! It's in three days!"
"Uh…"
Chen Xiaobei's face flushed. He finally remembered—he'd said the same line to Lin Xiang once!
Daydreaming is a disease! It needs treatment!
Always thinking about doing 羞羞的 (shameful) things with goddesses—so dirty!
"Yes! I'd love to go!" Chen Xiaobei nodded quickly, not wanting Lan Mengchen to notice his dirty thoughts.
"Good."
Lan Mengchen smiled: "I'll call you in advance. We'll get you a new look first!"
"Oh, okay…" Chen Xiaobei scratched his nose. His "small farmer" image really needed an upgrade. He wasn't short of money now, so why shortchange himself?
"Then it's a deal in three days— 不见不散 (don't leave without seeing each other)!" Lan Mengchen's lips curved up, her beautiful eyes shining with clear light.
"So beautiful…" Chen Xiaobei sighed in admiration, earning another playful huff from the goddess.
Later,
Chen Xiaobei walked Lan Mengchen back to her dorm. Once he was in a secluded spot, he couldn't wait to take out his phone.
He'd planned to check the three red envelopes he'd grabbed today,
But as soon as he unlocked the phone, he saw a message.
The sender's profile picture was a handsome guy in his twenties, and the name was apparently —Lord Tongtian!
"Wow! The main man's here! But I never added the Lord Tongtian as a friend…" Chen Xiaobei frowned, opening the message.
Lord Tongtian: Young man, don't be afraid! This seat used great magic to tweak the Three Realms Immortal Network's code and force-add you as a friend.
"F**k! He even knows what I'm thinking!" Chen Xiaobei jumped.
Lord Tongtian: This seat not only knows what you're thinking, but also sees your extraordinary bones—you're a once-in-a-million-years cultivation genius! That's why I gave you the "Mixed Yuan One-Thought Technique"!
"I'm dizzy! Is he gonna ask me to save the world next…? That's how it goes in movies…" Chen Xiaobei's head dropped with 黑线 (black lines, slang for "awkwardness").
Chatting with the Lord Tongtian required no typing. Whatever Chen Xiaobei thought, the Lord Tongtian knew instantly.
Lord Tongtian: You're quite insightful! But you're wrong. This seat wants you to safeguard the peace of the Three Realms! And this isn't a movie—it's about to happen!
"Seriously… Sage… don't scare me…" Chen Xiaobei swallowed hard. This was getting big.
Lord Tongtian: No time to explain. This seat must attend a meeting in the Void Realm. Cultivate hard first, and I'll contact you when I have time.
"Sage! Wait! Will I get kicked out of the group?" Chen Xiaobei hurried to ask. This was his biggest concern.