Chapter 2 Why are you spitting shit?
Tonight is XuBingbing's birthday, and Shi Mingwei threw her a celebration in a luXurious private room. More than thirty classmates and friends were invited, making the atmosphere lively and bustling.
"Kiss her! Kiss her..."
After several rounds of drinking, the crowd started clamoring, urging Shi Mingwei and XuBingbing to show affection.
At that moment, the door of the private room suddenly opened, and Li Pingfan walked in.
"Why are you here? You're not welcome!" XuBingbing said coldly.
"You little peasant, can't you take a hint? XuBingbing loves me. If you keep pestering her, you'll only humiliate yourself!" Shi Mingwei said with disdain.
Li Pingfan shook his head and said calmly, "Don't misunderstand. I've come to my senses. XuBingbing and I are not the same kind of people; forcing a relationship won't bring happiness. I'm willing to wish you well and came specifically to witness your happy moment."
"Smart of you. Otherwise, I could crush you in minutes!" Shi Mingwei smirked arrogantly. "Where were we just now? Let's continue!"
"Kiss her! Kiss her..."
"Master Shi! Go for a French kiss!"
"Must kiss for at least three minutes!"
The surrounding crowd jeered again, taking out their phones, ready to record this sweet and happy moment.
Shi Mingwei, putting on a pretentious act, walked over, wrapped his left arm around XuBingbing's waist, lifted her chin with his right hand, and leaned in for a "loving" kiss.
At the same time, Li Pingfan held up a magical monkey hair, growled in his heart: Turn into a pile of hot shit and go into Shi Mingwei's mouth!
"Whoosh!"
Li Pingfan blew gently, and the magical monkey hair flew straight toward Shi Mingwei's pouted mouth.
"Brother Wei? What's in your mouth?" XuBingbing froze for a moment.
"Ugh..."
Shi Mingwei suddenly felt his mouth filled with something extremely stinky. His cheeks puffed up, and with a large puddle of yellow, runny, smelly feces sprayed all over XuBingbing's face and hair.
The onlookers were stunned, completely confused by what had just happened.
"Damn! Master Shi! Why are you spitting shit?!"
Li Pingfan shouted at the top of his lungs, then pulled out his camera and press the shutter crazily, capturing this gross moment.
"Shit? Master Shi spit out... Ugh! I can't take it, I need to go out and vomit..."
"Damn! How can someone even spit that out? It's so fucking disgusting!"
"Let me out! I'm about to suffocate..."
The crowd scrambled to escape the private room.
Shi Mingwei, still acting like an idiot, smacked his lips, tasted it, and finally confirmed it was indeed shit.
He widened his eyes suddenly, locked gazes with the dumbfounded XuBingbing for a second, then both bent over and vomited violently!
Ding— The magical monkey hair will expire in 3 hours.
"Three hours is long enough for them to suffer!" Upon receiving the notification, Li Pingfan quickly pinched his nose and fled the scene.
After rushing out of the KTV, Li Pingfan burst into laughter.
Thinking about XuBingbing's heartlessness and gold-digging snobbery, and Shi Mingwei's excessive arrogance and bullying... Li Pingfan's heart felt only one thing—refreshing!
Of course, even though he felt refreshed, he would never forget that today's revenge was all thanks to...
"The magical monkey hair is such a treasure! It's a pity there's only one left; I must use it carefully. Now, I need to find a place to check out the other two new treasures!"
Calming down, Li Pingfan ran to a deserted alley next to the KTV.
"First, let's see the Bagua Evolution Divine Pattern from the Supreme Lord Laozi! As the leader of the Three Pure Ones, his status is supreme—anything he gives must be a top-tier treasure!"
Li Pingfan opened his treasure box, with anticipation, and pressed "Extract."
Hum— A brilliant light emerged from his phone, swirling and transforming in front of him.
Tai Chi, Two Principles, Four Symbols, Five Elements, Eight Trigrams, Ten Heavenly Stems, Twelve Earthly Branches, Twenty-Four Solar Terms, Stars in the Sky, All Things in the World... In an instant, it evolved into a universe!
"Awesome! This is cooler than Hollywood special effects!" Li Pingfan exclaimed in amazement.
Ding— The Bagua Evolution Divine Pattern allows the user to divine good fortune and misfortune, observe the rise and fall of luck, and measure feng shui patterns. Use it now?
"Yes! Definitely!"
Li Pingfan tapped the screen, and the brilliant pattern quickly merged into his left palm. After focusing on sensing it, he raised his left hand and began to calculate with his fingers.
"Come on! Let this master predict today's luck..."
Li Pingfan had mastered the true secrets of Bagua Evolution. Compared to those half-baked feng shui masters out there, he was the real deal!
Suddenly, he widened his eyes in shock and said, "Damn! South direction! Peach blossom luck is coming!"
No sooner had he spoken than a stunning beauty ran quickly toward him.
Her features were exquisitely perfect, her skin as smooth as jade, her figure tall and curvaceous, and her long, fair legs were absolutely flawless—enough to make any man's blood boil.
Coincidentally, Li Pingfan recognized her: "The top of the Four Campus Beauties, Lan Mengchen!"
The school forum had selected four campus beauties, and Lan Mengchen was renowned for her perfect looks and cold elegance. She kept a low profile with no scandals, making her the 公认 perfect goddess with the highest popularity!
Before, with XuBingbing in his life, Li Pingfan hadn't paid much attention to the Four Campus Beauties. But now, looking closely, he was amazed by Lan Mengchen—compared to her, XuBingbing was nothing but trash!
"Help! Sir, please save me..." Lan Mengchen was running so fast that she crashed into Li Pingfan's arms.
"So soft..." Li Pingfan was hit by two firm, perky mounds, nearly making his nose bleed.
"What's soft?" Lan Mengchen, full of anxiety, kept glancing behind her.
"Cough, nothing..." Li Pingfan shook his head and asked, "What's wrong with you?"
"Hmph! Let me tell you!"
At that moment, a group of fierce-looking men caught up. The leader, with dyed red hair, said arrogantly, "I've taken a fancy to this chick! She has to accompany me tonight!"
Behind him were at least ten followers—judging by their clothes, they were all gangsters and thugs.
"Sir, save me! I'll definitely repay you well!" Lan Mengchen nervously grabbed Li Pingfan's sleeve.
"Uh... Miss, there are so many of them. How can I save you?" Cold sweat broke out on Li Pingfan's forehead.
He was just an ordinary college student, barely passing PE—how could he fight these thugs?
"Aren't online novels always about beauties in danger being saved by the protagonist? You look like the main character to me!" Lan Mengchen was so anxious that she was clutching at straws.
"Miss, this is real life! Acting tough like in online novels will get you killed..." Li Pingfan wore a pained expression.
"Stupid kid! Get lost if you don't want to die! Don't ruin Brother Huoji's chance to pick up a girl!" A bald man stepped forward angrily.
"Hmm?"
Li Pingfan's eyes lit up, and he shouted, "Don't come over! Otherwise, there will be bloodshed!"