Naruto strolled lazily home and pushed open the front door.
"Oh crap!"
WHAM!
A fist full of motherly love greeted him square in the face.
"Naruto Uzumaki!"
Kushina stood over him, furious.
"Did you take my sealing scrolls again?!"
Naruto froze.
Crap. I'm busted.
"I told you! No learning sealing jutsu until after you graduate!"
"And you even stuffed fakes back into fool me?!"
She tossed a few blank scrolls at his feet.
Naruto stared at her enraged face.
Dad wasn't home.
No backup.
Only one option:
"Mom, I'm sorry!!!"
Poof!
He vanished in a flash.
Kushina blinked, stunned.
Wait a second… was that… the Flying Thunder God?!
She snapped out of it and screamed toward the ceiling:
"Minato! Get back here and deal with your damn son!!"
Behind the house, Naruto reappeared, back pressed against the wall.
He flinched as he heard his mom's scream echo through the neighborhood.
Most kids' parents dream of raising prodigies.
Not Kushina.
After witnessing the destruction of the Uzumaki Clan, she believed in the saying:
"The tallest tree catches the most wind."
She just wanted Naruto to grow up healthy and happy, not as some flashy, envy-inducing genius.
Minato, on the other hand, was the opposite.
He wanted to pass down everything he knew to his son. Everything.
The couple eventually compromised:
No ninja techniques until Naruto graduated.
But did either of them stick to that?
Not a chance.
Minato taught in secret, and Naruto learned in secret.
And after all those years of hiding it…
Boom. Today, the truth came out.
Just as Naruto was about to sneak off again, poof! Another figure appeared in front of him.
"You little brat! Using sealing techniques is bad enough, but the Flying Thunder God?! Are you trying to get me killed?!"
Minato ruffled his son's hair in frustration.
Sure, technically Naruto could start learning tomorrow… but Kushina didn't care about technicalities.
Even a minute early was enough to warrant a beatdown.
"I had no choice!" Naruto groaned. "You know how scary Mom is!"
The father-son duo shared a long, exhausted sigh.
"Sigh…"
"…Ramen?"
"Yeah."
iruka Ramen
"Two large bowls!"
"You got it! Let me guess, Kushina kicked you out again?"
Old Man Teuchi laughed as he started boiling noodles.
Minato and Naruto sat there, defeated.
By now, Teuchi had seen this scene a dozen times.
The two things most people knew about the Yellow Flash:
He was fast.
He was terrified of his wife.
And by the looks of it, Naruto was set to inherit both traits.
"Don't even bring it up. Just feed us, please!"
"Ha! Gotcha. Ayame, rush order!"
"On it!"
Ayame gave Naruto a sweet, sympathetic smile.
"So, Naruto, you graduate tomorrow, huh?"
With the shop mostly empty, Teuchi made small talk while cooking.
"Yeah. No more carefree days."
"You talk like an old man already," Minato chuckled.
Then something crossed his mind.
"By the way, Naruto, once you graduate, you'll get assigned a jōnin instructor. The current ones on rotation are Kakashi, Kurenai, Asuma, and Rin. Who do you want?"
"Hm? What about Obito?"
Minato sighed.
"That idiot failed his jōnin exam again last week."
"What happened this time?"
Naruto groaned.
Obito might not have gone dark in this world, but he sure leaned into his goofball side hard.
"He tried to join the ANBU as a jōnin rejected, challenged seven members to a fight, got caught in Itachi's Tsukuyomi, and slept for three straight days."
"Pfft HAHAHAHA!"
Naruto doubled over laughing.
No Mangekyō, no chance. How did Obito think he could beat Itachi?
Speaking of Mangekyō, the original requirement for unlocking it was witnessing the death of someone close to you.
Pretty brutal.
But here in this version of the world, Naruto discovered there were plenty of Mangekyō users in the Uchiha clan.
Turns out, there were two ways to awaken it:
The traumatic way of losing a loved one.
The "ceremonial" way is witnessing the death of an elder clan member.
That's right.
When an elder Uchiha was near death, they'd summon their descendants to their bedside.
Any genuinely grieving successor had a high chance of unlocking the Mangekyō.
Traditional and efficient.
"Order up! Naruto, I added extra fish cakes. Good luck tomorrow!"
"Thanks, Ayame-nee! Itadakimasu!"
The smell of ramen interrupted their conversation.
Naruto dove in.
He needed fuel; he was probably getting smacked again when he got home.
Next Morning
Naruto left the house bruised and battered.
"Pffft, Naruto! Again? Got whooped by your mom, huh?"
"Woof woof!"
Kiba was waiting outside the school gates, laughing with Akamaru in his arms.
Naruto ignored him and walked in.
"Are you still hurting, Naruto-kun?"
In the classroom, Hinata leaned in, worriedly checking his face.
No one was shocked; everyone knew the Uzumaki household was a hands-on type of family.
Iruka and Mizuki sat behind the podium, where a pile of forehead protectors gleamed.
The Konoha symbol is a symbol of true ninja status.
The familiar sight made Naruto's heart race.
After more than ten years in this world… I'm finally becoming a real ninja.
But this wasn't just about passing the test.
Iruka cleared his throat.
"Alright, the graduation exam begins now. The test is… the Clone Jutsu. Come to the front when your name is called."
"Haruno Sakura…"
One by one, students went up to demonstrate their jutsu.
A few nameless background characters failed.
Everyone important? They passed easily.
Then came:
"Naruto Uzumaki!"
Finally, the main character takes the stage.
"Go, Naruto-kun!" Hinata whispered.
"Don't choke, dude!" Kiba grinned.
"Woof!"
"My brother did all three techniques when he graduated!"
Sasuke puffed his chest proudly.
"My dad is Minato."
"…."
Sasuke shut up.
"You've got this, Naruto!"
Iruka smiled encouragingly.
Naruto took a deep breath and formed the hand seals.
Blue chakra surged around him, wild and overwhelming.
The sheer force stunned everyone in the room.
This was no ordinary kid.
"Clone Jutsu!"
FWWPT
…
PFFFFFT
He started.
A silence fell over the class.
Then…
"BAHAHAHAHA!
"No. 1 Most Unexpected Ninja!"
"I, Kiba, crown you the Funniest Shinobi!"
Naruto stood there awkwardly, scratching his head.
"Oops. Too much effort, I guess."
Iruka's eye twitched. He sighed deeply.
"Naruto Uzumaki… failed the exam."