The walk back to my cabin felt longer than usual.
Maybe because I had just learned I could accidentally slap someone's soul out of their body. Or maybe because Emberchick, riding on my shoulder like a smug volcanic parrot, kept pecking at my hair every time I zoned out.
Either way, by the time I reached my homestead — glowing faintly from its [Mystic Homestead] aura and puffing chimney like a friendly Skyrim mod — I was tired.
The moment I stepped through the door, I was hit with the warm smell of spirit stew and mana-baked bread. Not mine.
> [Auto-Kitchen Passive: Guest Chef Detected! Temporary Buff: "Smells Like Home" +15 SAN]
"Oh gods," I groaned. "Kaela's cooking.....i don't think she good at that."
And yeah. There she was.
Standing barefoot in my kitchen, sleeves rolled up, and completely oblivious to the fact she looked like a battle-hardened adventurer turned fantasy housewife. Her silver hair was tied up in a messy bun. The oversized tunic she wore — mine, by the way — had one sleeve slipping off the shoulder. She looked... unreasonably good for someone recovering from end-of-world trauma.
Kaela turned as I entered. "You're back," she said, eyeing the soot on my cloak and the faint glow from Emberchick.
I nodded. "Yup. Accidentally murdered a guy at the village gate. My hand's a lethal weapon now."
She blinked. "Do I want to know?"
"Not even a little."
We stood in silence. Emberchick hopped off my shoulder and waddled toward the fireplace, belching out a puff of sparks that roasted a nearby mana-potato sitting on the counter. Casual arson. Love that for us.
Kaela stirred the stew like this was all normal.
"Your chicken's demonic."
"He prefers the term ambitiously warm."
She snorted. Then handed me a bowl. "Eat. You look like you glitched into the wrong side of a boss fight."
I slumped into a chair and took the bowl gratefully.
Spirit stew, as it turns out, is delicious. Kind of like if miso ramen and golden sunlight had a lovechild.
"So…" I said between mouthfuls. "What's your story, really?"
Kaela's spoon paused mid-air. Her face blanked out, expression unreadable.
"…I was part of a raid team," she finally said. "One of the big guilds. We were trying to take down a sealed dungeon node. Something… broke."
She looked up at me, eyes dark. "Everything fell apart. People started going mad. Systems failed. Then… that thing woke up."
I didn't ask what "that thing" was. Mainly because the mana-steam from the stew suddenly whirled into an angry spiral above the pot before calming again. Which felt like a warning from the plot gods.
"So you ran," I guessed.
She nodded slowly. "Only survivor. At least… I think."
I leaned back. The cozy kitchen air didn't feel so cozy anymore.
"Welcome to Greenroot," I said eventually. "It's technically on fire."
She smiled faintly. "Yeah. I noticed."
We ate in silence for a while. Emberchick curled in Kaela's lap halfway through like some sort of hellcat-meets-therapy-pet. She didn't complain. Just scratched behind its flaming feather-ears like it wasn't dangerously flammable.
Maybe she really was traumatized.
> [Bonding Progress: Kaela – +3 Affection] [New Trait Discovered: Flame-Resistant Petting Hands]
Okay, that second one had to be a joke.
---
After dinner, I showed her around the upgraded cabin.
The Spirit Cooker. The phoenix coop. The tea altar. The enchanted shovel that could literally break bedrock and make pancakes.
She didn't say much, but her eyebrows kept rising with every new System screen.
"You sure you're just a villager?" she asked as we stepped out into the cool twilight.
"Define villager," I said, just as the coop gave off another flare and the nearby scarecrow started glowing like a medieval bug zapper.
> [Chicken Defense Array – Phase 1 Activated]
> [Hostile Entity Detected: Proximity 300m]
Oh no.
I whirled around just in time to see the radar pulse expand on my interface — a red dot blinking in the woods.
"Something's coming."
Kaela was already moving. She grabbed the sword I'd helped craft for her (somehow turned out Epic-tier), and stood at the ready near the garden path.
Then the wind changed.
A cold, sharp breeze, like knives whispering across the leaves. The mana around us tightened, like it was holding its breath.
And from the trees stepped—
A figure in a cloak.
No footsteps. Just presence.
They wore a smooth, featureless mask — bone white with a crack across one cheek. No name floated above their head.
Not a player.
Not an NPC.
Something… else.
"Hey," I called, before my brain could stop my mouth. "If you're here for the stew, we're fresh out."
The figure tilted its head.
Then, in a voice like gravel and wind: "You are not meant to exist."
Kaela tensed beside me.
I raised my hands. "Okay, wow, rude. I didn't ask to get isekai'd, you know."
The figure didn't laugh. Of course not.
> [Warning: ??? Entity Detected – Origin: Forbidden Update Patch v0.0.∞]
> [Auto-Slap: READY]
> [Auto-Slap Override: DISABLED (Target Immune)]
…Crap.