Chapter 81
"…Is anything wrong, Haemin?"
He flinched slightly, tightening his grip on my hand for a moment before loosening it again.
"Ah… n–nothing," he murmured, avoiding my gaze.
We walked side by side along the sidewalk. Haemin's small hand was wrapped around mine. I could feel how stiff he was walking, his steps a little awkward, like he wasn't used to this at all.
"Are you shy? Because we're holding hands? I asked softly, letting my thumb brush lightly over his knuckles.
His ears immediately turned red.
He shook his head at first, before nodding slowly.
"…Only with Umma… before."
Seeing his reaction, I couldn't help but smiled.
"Well, we have to hold hands. I promised your mother I'd look after you, remember? If I don't hold your hand, you might get lost."
His eyes widened, and then he nodded, gripping my hand a little tighter as if anchoring himself to me.
"I won't let go."
I laughed softly. "Good."
Well, that was my excuse. But the truth was, I just wanted to keep holding his hand a little longer.
Two months had passed since that day, and by then, I had already started my third year of middle school.
I didn't know what had happened to my father, nor was I curious enough to find out. Part of me had already decided that whatever happened to him, I didn't care anymore. After what he had done to my mother, I no longer recognized him. There was nothing inside me but hatred toward him, a hatred that kept rising, mixed with fear from the memory of what he had done.
It was hard to forget that traumatic day at first. The memories would return when I least expected them. But Mr. Kim and Ms. Lee helped me through it.
They treated me so kindly that I often felt guilty, but they always told me not to think like that and to simply accept it. They said they already thought of me as part of their family. Mr. Kim even said that maybe our meeting was not a coincidence at all, that it was simply fate bringing us together at this moment in our lives.
Fate, huh? I let out a quiet chuckle when I heard that.
Living with them, I came to admire how devoted Mr. Kim was to his family. He always made sure to spend time together. Mr. Kim worked as a teacher, so his schedule was stable. Even though he was still quite busy with school matters during the holidays, he always came home early. Almost every night, we had dinner together. After dinner, we would sit in the living room, talk about our day, and watching television.
Day by day, our relationship grew naturally. Without realizing it, I started to feel more at ease around them. I smiled more often and found myself opening up little by little.
I also became closer with Haemin as the days passed. He was also part of the reason why I started smiling more. Whenever he noticed me looking sad, he would do things in his own way to cheer me up, and it always managed to bring a smile to my face and warmth to my heart.
Little by little, I found myself growing attached to him. It reminded me that there was someone who cared about me, not just Haemin, but his whole family.
Still, I had to admit that their care could sometimes feel a little suffocating. Not in a bad way, though.
There was one moment, about a week before my school started. They suddenly said they wanted to cover my school expenses. As soon as those words left their mouths, I cut them off. There was no way I was going to let them do that.
Paying for school and my daily needs was never a problem for me. I had my own savings account under my name. My mother, though just a housewife, came from a well-off family herself. She had been saving my allowance there for me since I was young, so I always had more than enough.
There was also money my father had set aside for me.
But I chose not to touch that.
Still, Mr. Kim and Ms. Lee insisted, just like they always did. In the end, I had no choice but to be firm this time. I told them that if they kept pushing it, I would have to leave the house. Because the guilt would be too much for me to bear.
They both panicked immediately upon hearing that and rushed to say they understood and would respect my decision. The sudden change was so dramatic that I couldn't help but laugh quietly. And just like that, peace was restored.
Living with them gradually became normal, even comforting. And that was what scared me. I didn't know if it was right to feel this way. After everything that had happened with my own family, part of me felt like I shouldn't be wishing for peace so easily.
But another part of me couldn't help it. I found myself hoping that I could stay like this for a while longer. I couldn't protect the happiness I once had with my own family.
So this time, I hoped I could protect this one instead.
.
"Haemin, is everything okay at school today?" I asked gently. "Is anyone bothering you? Are you doing okay with your friends?"
He shook his head quickly. "School is good. Today we draw. I draw a house. Teacher say it's nice."
"That's good. Did you play with your friends?"
"I play… a little."
A soft sigh escaped me.
Haemin had already turned five this year and had started kindergarten not long ago. Picking him up had become part of my routine. His kindergarten was on the way back from my school, so it's only natural for me to stop by every afternoon. I guess part of the reason I liked doing it was… because I worried about him more than I probably should. Maybe I overthought things, but I couldn't help wanting to see for myself how he was doing at school, and to make sure no one gave him a hard time or made him uncomfortable. I wanted to know he was safe and happy.
It also helped Mr. Kim a lot. He no longer had to rush from school to pick up Haemin.
Both Mr. Kim and Ms. Lee thanked me a lot for it, though I always told them it wasn't a big deal.
Since I picked him up every day, I often took a moment to ask his teacher how he was doing at school. She told me that Haemin was a very smart child. He learned quickly and had no trouble keeping up with the lessons.
However, she also mentioned that he had one main difficulty. He was very quiet.
Haemin tended to distance himself from his friends and preferred to be alone. Because of that, the other children didn't really know how to approach him or how to befriend him properly, so they often kept their distance as well.
But the teacher reassured me not to worry. She said she always tried to help him blend in with the other children by pairing him with classmates during activities and encouraging group play. She also taught the children how to include one another, while gently helping Haemin build the confidence to interact with them.
I let out a small sigh. The teacher had told me that maybe Haemin just needed more time. But seeing him now, I could tell he still wasn't quite getting used to it.
I stopped and crouched down to meet his eyes.
"Haemin, listen to me, alright? You shouldn't be so shy all the time. If you don't talk to your friends, you might end up finishing school without any. And you don't want that, do you?"
"But… I have you, Noona?"
His words made me smile once more. "Haemin… having a few friends isn't that bad, you know? They can play with you and help you when you need it. I'll always be here, but it's okay to let other kids in too. Try to speak up next time, alright?"
"Noona will always be here?"
"Of course. Why would I leave my cute little brother alone?"
"Little brother?"
"Yes… why? You don't want me to be your sister? You don't like me anymore?"
"I do! I like you, noona!"
A gentle warmth bloomed in my chest as I heard that, and I held his hand a little tighter.
"But… what if you disappear one day?"
"Even if we're apart someday, I'll always find my way back to you."
"Promise?" He slowly lifted his pinky finger.
I hooked mine with his. "Promise."
He nodded seriously. "Okay, Noona. Then I'll try."
I ruffled his hair softly. "That's my boy."
He laughed softly, leaning closer to my side as we started walking again.
Haemin and I were heading to the hospital to visit my mother.
I still remember the day the hospital called me. It was a week after my mother had been admitted. They told me she had finally woken up.
I went there alone immediately, without even having time to inform Mr. Kim or Ms. Lee, overwhelmed by the news.
Before I was allowed into the room, the doctor explained her condition. Physically, she was no longer in immediate danger. Emotionally, however, it was different. The shock had left her withdrawn, and for the time being, the doctor advised that only I should visit her. Too many people might overwhelm her.
When I entered the room for the first time, she was awake, but she didn't react when I called her name. I sat beside her bed for a long while and tried to talk to her, but she didn't respond at all. She just stared up at the ceiling, her eyes empty. Seeing her like that really broke my heart. In the end, I decided not to disturb her any further and quietly left, hoping she just needed time.
A week later, I returned.
This time, when I spoke to her, her eyes slowly shifted toward me. Her voice was weak, but she said my name. That alone was enough to make tears well up in my eyes. It was a small sign of improvement, but it meant everything to me.
From then on, I visited her regularly. With each visit, she spoke a little more, though she tired easily. Sometimes she would pause in the middle of a sentence. Other times, she would fall silent again. I told myself this was probably a normal reaction after everything she had been through. Still, her condition was improving, even if only little by little.
Without wasting any more time, I apologized to her for everything.
She shook her head and made it clear that I should never blame myself. She said, what happened between her and my father, it was their responsibility. Not mine to bear.
After that, I avoided mentioning my father. I didn't ask what had happened that day either. I was afraid it might reopen her trauma. Instead, I talked about other things.
I told her about Mr. Kim and his family. About how we met, how kind they were, and how they took me in. I told her about Haemin too. About how shy and cute he was, and how he had already started calling me his sister.
As I spoke, I noticed something strange.
She just listened quietly. Her expression didn't change much, but sometimes her gaze lingered on me in a way I couldn't quite understand. As if she was somewhere far away.
But I chose not to think too deeply about it.
I told her I was staying with them for the time being.
She nodded slowly and said that she hoped one day, when she had recovered properly, she would be able to meet them and thank them herself.
A small smile tugged at my lips as I told her that Mr. Kim's family couldn't wait to meet her too. I assured her that once she did, she would be surprised by just how kind they were.
.
School started not long after that, and it became harder for me to visit my mother as often as before. She understood that, and she had also begun her rehabilitation sessions. It felt better to let her focus on that first.
But this past week got me so busy with studying that I didn't get to meet her.
Since I finally have some free time today, I want to go see her and bring Haemin along.
The hospital building came into view as we walked. I tightened my grip on Haemin's hand slightly and looked down at him.
"We've arrived. Today, I want to introduce you to my mother, okay?"
Haemin didn't say anything. He just squeezed my hand softly in response.
"Don't be worried, my mother is kind and gentle… just like your mother."
Haemin glanced up at me, looking a little nervous, but he nodded anyway, still holding onto my hand as we headed inside together and went toward the reception counter.
"Good afternoon," I said to the nurse behind the counter. "I'm here to visit a patient. Her name is Shin Haneul."
The nurse nodded and typed on her computer, her eyes scanning the screen.
"…Shin Haneul," she repeated quietly.
Her fingers paused.
She frowned slightly and leaned closer to the monitor, typing again. After a moment, she glanced to the side.
"Just a moment, please."
She stood up and called another nurse over. They whispered to each other while looking at the screen.
I stepped closer to the counter.
"Is there a problem?"
The second nurse looked at me. "May I ask what your relationship is to the patient?"
"I'm her daughter. I've been visiting her regularly."
The nurse's brows knit together. She turned back to the screen once more, then let out a quiet breath.
"…I see."
"What is it? Is something wrong?"
The nurse hesitated.
"Your mother… has been transferred to another hospital."
"…What?!"
For a second, I thought I had misheard.
"Transferred? Since when?"
"Please wait here, I'll call the doctor who was in charge of her."
A few minutes later, a doctor approached us. I recognized him immediately. He was the doctor who had been in charge of my mother's care all this time.
"Doctor, why was my mother transferred?"
He looked uncomfortable. His eyes avoided mine for a brief moment.
"She was moved a week ago. It was decided that another facility would be more suitable for her continued care."
"But why? Her condition was improving, wasn't it? And she was stable."
"Yes, medically she was, but the transfer decision was made by her legal guardian."
My breath caught.
"…Her legal guardian? Who? Could it be my father?"
The doctor didn't deny it.
What? My father had been released? How could the police have let him go? Was it Chairman Seo who had bailed him out?
"Then why wasn't I informed? You had my contact information, didn't you?"
The doctor fell silent. I won't lie, he was starting to get on my nerves.
"…Doctor, where was my mother transferred to?"
"I'm sorry, I can't disclose that information without proper authorization."
For a moment, everything inside me snapped.
"…Are you kidding me?! That's my mother. And you're telling me you moved her without telling me and now you can't even tell me where she is?! You knew her condition. And you still let him take her without even notifying me?!"
"But, Miss… this was handled according to procedure."
"I don't care about your procedure!"
"Noona…" Haemin tugged lightly at my sleeve.
I froze. My anger caught up to me to the point that I forgot Haemin was with me. His eyes wide with worry and fear. My raised voice had scared him. I immediately forced myself to calm down. I crouched in front of him and gently ruffled his hair again.
"I'm sorry, Haemin. I didn't mean to scare you. I just…lost my temper for a moment."
He nodded slightly, still holding onto my sleeve.
The doctor cleared his throat. "I truly am sorry. I understand how upsetting this is for you. But for now, I really can't share any details. Please don't worry too much. Your mother is being taken care of properly. When her condition stabilizes further, we will contact you."
I almost snapped again. But I stopped myself. Arguing more right now would not change anything. Apparently, my father had pulled his strings. There was no way these people were going to listen to me.
But why would he do this?
…He wouldn't hurt her again. Right?
I straightened slowly and looked at the doctor.
"We're leaving," I said quietly.
Then I met his eyes, my voice dropping lower.
"But this isn't over."
The doctor stiffened.
"If anything happens to my mother, don't think I'll stay quiet. And don't think I won't do anything just because of my age."
He didn't reply.
I turned away, took Haemin's hand, and led him out of the hospital.
We walked in silence for a while. My feet kept moving, but my mind was far away. There's so many question in my mind right now. The more I thought about it, the heavier my chest felt.
"…Noona?"
Haemin's voice pulled me from my thoughts. I looked down at him.
"Are you… okay?"
I paused for a second, then smiled at him.
"I'm sorry, Haemin," I added softly. "I scared you, didn't I?"
He shook his head a little, before giving me a shy little smile.
"It's okay."
I let out a soft chuckle.
We reached the roadside and waited for a taxi. Not long after, one pulled over, and we got in.
I leaned back against the seat and looked out the window, watching the scenery pass by while my thoughts drifted again.
*Sigh*
After a few minutes, the familiar streets of our neighborhood came into view. The taxi slowed down and dropped us off by the roadside.
We got out of the taxi and we started walking toward the building. I glanced down at Haemin who walked quietly beside me.
"Haemin, is there something you would like to eat tonight? I'll make it for you."
His steps slowed, and his eyes lit up almost instantly.
"…Really?"
I nodded. "Yup"
He thought for a moment, brows knitting together in serious concentration.
"I want Japchae. With lots of noodles," he answered with clear excitement.
"Alright. Japchae it is."
He nodded enthusiastically, swinging our joined hands a little as we continued walking.
I couldn't help but laugh, seeing him so happy.
Just as we were about to reach the elevator, at the edge of the parking lot, a familiar black Mercedes caught my eye.
My steps faltered.
At first, I thought I was mistaken. I slowed down, my gaze lingering on the car a little longer.
Then—
My heart started to beat faster.
No…
It can't be.
I looked again… the plate was the same.
My breath hitched. It was… my father's car.
Wait, why was it here?
My mind spun wildly. Did he find out where I was staying?
But when?
How?
A cold chill ran down my spine. Ms. Lee was at home right now. Mr. Kim probably hadn't returned yet.
Panic surged through me. Without thinking, I tightened my grip on Haemin's hand and quickened my pace.
"Noona?"
"I'm sorry," I said quickly, not slowing down. "We need to go up now."
I practically pulled him along as we rushed toward the entrance. My heart pounded as the scene from that day replayed in my mind.
Please…
Don't let anything bad happen.
The elevator doors slid open, and I quickly ushered Haemin inside. My hand was trembling as I pressed the button for our floor.
The elevator began to move up quietly, and only then did I realize how fast I was breathing.
"Noona…" Haemin looked up at me. "Why are we running?"
I swallowed and forced myself to relax my grip on his hand.
"I'm sorry. I… I need to check on something."
He nodded, not fully understanding, but he didn't ask any more questions.
When we reached our floor, we quickly hurried toward the apartment. Once I opened the door, the living room was quiet, but I could hear some noise coming from the kitchen.
No this can't be…
I sprinted toward the kitchen and then…
I froze.
My father was there, sitting across from Mr. Kim.
Ms. Lee was standing nearby, just about to set a cup of tea down on the table.
All of them look at me surprised.
"Oh dear, Harin. You've returned."
What the hell is this. What's going on here?
"You've arrived. We've been waiting for you," Mr. Kim said.
Why is he here?
My father's eyes softened as he looked at me, a gentle smile forming on his lips.
"How are you doing, Harin?"