Chapter 77
I don't talk about my childhood often… mostly because there isn't much warmth to remember.
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"Congratulations, Harin! First place in class, as expected of my daughter."
"Our Harin always works so hard. We're so proud of you."
"I know, right? Our daughter isn't just smart, she's beautiful too. I'm so proud to be your father."
That's what my parents always said to me. Back then, I used to smile every time they praised me like that. Their words were what pushed me to give my best in everything I did. And the way my parents acted around each other… most outsiders who looked at us probably thought we were a happy, loving family. Honestly, even I believed that at first.
My father, he worked as the personal assistant to Nara Group's second-generation successor, Chairman Seo Hyeon-guk, Seo Yuna's father. His dedication to the company was unquestionable.
Sometimes, I felt so proud of him. After all, he worked beside one of the most influential figures in Korea at that time. When I was younger, he was my role model. And even though he wasn't around often because of his work, I never felt so distant from him.
I still remember the day my father took me to visit the chairman in the hospital for the first time. His condition wasn't serious yet, just the early symptoms of the illness that would later take his life. Back then, everyone still believed he would recover soon.
That day was also the first time I met Seo Yuna.
"Chairman, how are you feeling today?"
"Oh? You brought someone with you. Is this the daughter you always talk about?"
"Yes, Chairman. I hope you don't mind."
"Mind? What do you mean? I've been wanting to meet her."
I stepped forward and bowed. "Good afternoon, Chairman. I hope your health gets better soon."
"Oh, look at that, such polite manners."
"Ah, perfect timing. Let me introduce you to my daughter."
"Yuna! Why are you just sitting there? Come here and greet Assistant Yoo."
His tone suddenly turned cold when he called for Yuna, but she didn't flinch. She simply stood, walked toward us with calm steps, and bowed politely.
"Look at this child. She doesn't even show proper respect to her elders."
"N-no, it's perfectly fine, Chairman. They're still children. It's normal."
The chairman let out a faint sigh before dropping the subject. Then the chairman and my father continued talking casually, slipping into a familiar conversation of their own. That day was also when I realized that Yuna and I were the same age. While they talked, I kept sneaking glances at her. She sat quietly on the sofa, staring out the window, completely expressionless. She looked so distant, and I couldn't understand why a girl my age would carry an expression like that.
I decided not to think too deeply about it.
By the way, from the way I looked at my father and the chairman, it was clear that the chairman treated my father more like a friend than a mere subordinate. Maybe that's why my father worked so hard to live up to that trust. But I couldn't help but wonder why the chairman treated Yuna so differently.
By the time I realized it, my first meeting with the chairman came to an end.
When we were driving home, my dad glanced at me from the driver's seat.
"Are you okay, Harin?"
"Uhm—yeah. Why?"
"I don't know. You seemed a little dazed after we left the hospital."
"I'm fine. Just lost in thought."
"If you say so… Anyway, to lighten your mood, since we're already heading back, this father of yours is going to treat you to some ice cream!"
"Dad, I'm not a little kid anymore. I don't need ice cream to feel better."
"Oh my, my daughter has really grown up now. But you're only twelve. Don't act like some old lady. Come on, let's go. Dad will still buy you ice cream."
I let out a small sigh but ended up chuckling under my breath.
"By the way, Dad… about this week's parent—"
*Phone buzzes*
"Hold on a second, Harin."
"Mm."
He answers immediately.
"Hello?"
It's always been like this.
"Yes, Chairman… the document that I send to you yesterday…"
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"…Yes, understood."
"I'll send the report this week."
*bleep*
He lowers the phone with a sigh.
"Sorry, Harin. Urgent call. What were you trying to say just now?"
I looked out the window.
"Uhm… it's okay. It wasn't that important."
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*that night*
I was half-asleep when I heard voices. At first, I thought it was just my imagination, but the whispers grew clearer. I sat up slowly, trying not to make a sound, and realized it was my parents talking.
"Can't you make time to attend Harin's parent meeting this week?"
"Sorry, Haneul… you know how busy I've been lately, don't you?"
"I know you're busy. But can't you try, just this once? She's always hoping you'll be the one to come."
"I really can't. The chairman's schedule is packed. I've already told you, didn't I? This week is impossible."
"You always say that."
"…I'm not doing it on purpose. You know that."
"I didn't say you were. But do you know how often Harin ask if you'll come this time?"
"She'll understand. She's a mature kid."
" She's still a child, Kang-min."
*sigh*
"Harin… she's a good kid. She doesn't show it, but later on, you're going to make her grow distant from you—"
"Mom?"
Both of my parents froze the moment they saw me standing in the hallway.
"Are you two fighting?"
My mother rushed toward me and knelt to my eye level.
"No, Harin-ah, we're not fighting. We were… just talking, that's all. Right, dear?"
"Y-Yeah, Harin. You just misheard. Why are you awake? It's really late… Go to sleep now, okay? You have school tomorrow, don't you?"
"Mm."
At that time, I was too young to understand anything. I really thought it was just a normal conversation between my parents. But, I didn't know it was the beginning of their marriage slowly cracking apart.
To be honest, even though my father spent so little time with me, he was still a loving and caring parent who tried his best whenever he could. Besides, it wasn't the first time he couldn't make time for me. I'd already grown used to it, and I never held it against him. As his daughter, I always tried to understand. I knew he was working hard for our family.
Strangely enough, that was the only time I ever saw them have a conversation like that. Every day after that, they seemed to get along just fine. They would tease each other and joke around like they always did. Seeing them like that really calmed the worry inside me.
Our life continued the way it usually did. Perhaps it was because of my mother's advice, my father began spending a little more time with me. It was not a dramatic change, yet it was enough for me to notice. He even made time to pick me up from school and attend parent meetings. Seeing the effort he made really brought a smile to my face.
Even so, there was something I kept becoming aware of. Whenever he appeared at my school, the attention he received was impossible to ignore. Everyone turned to look at him as he walked by. I understood why. He was a good-looking man, and his calm manner made people naturally drawn to him. There was one time when I had to pull him away because a teacher was being a little too friendly.
Even though it was annoying to see so many people trying to get his attention, but I could not deny the sense of pride I felt when I stood next to him and introduced him as my father.
From that period onward, he began taking longer breaks from work during the weekends. He made it a habit to take my mother and me out for dinner every week. Those evenings became something I looked forward to. I found myself smiling at him more often without realizing it.
*Pop*
"Happy birthday, Harin!"
My father appeared from behind the kitchen, holding a small cake with tiny candles flickering on top. For a moment, I froze.
"You must be thinking that I forgot about it, right?"
I let out a faint smile.
My mother leaned closer to the cake, squinting.
"Dear, what is this weird stick man on the cake?"
I couldn't help but let out a small laugh at my mother's remark.
"What do you mean, Haneul? It's us, obviously. I poured my whole heart drawing our family on this cake, you know?"
"This heart of yours… did you draw this with your eyes closed?"
I burst out laughing.
"Harin, even you think this stick man is funny?"
"Haha–sorry, sorry! I didn't mean to make fun of it. Thank you, Dad. I really mean it."
"See that, Haneul? Harin loves it."
My mother sighed but couldn't hide her smile.
"Come on, Harin. Blow the candle. And don't forget to make a wish."
I closed my eyes, took a breath, and made the simplest wish. Then I blew out the candles as my parents clapped beside me.
"Ermm, what do you wish for, Harin?"
"Why are you asking him that? A wish supposed to be secret."
I can let out soft chuckled.
"I wished for us to be happy forever. And…"
I hesitated for a moment, then smiled as both of them looked at me.
"…and for us to stay like this for a long, long time."
My parents exchanged a look and smiled warmly.
"Harin, we love you so much. You know that, right?"
"Yeah, I know."
I truly wished with all my heart that this small, fragile happiness would last forever. For a while, it felt like it would. But as the company continued to grow, my father slowly returned to the busy life he had always lived.
But as always, I never held any resentment toward my father. I understood how important his work was to him, and I believed he loved me and my mother even if he could not always be here with us.
What I did not realize was that my mother did not feel the same way I did.
And just like that, two years passed.
By then, I had already turned fourteen. And it was the end of summer when it happened.
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That evening, my father called me to the living room, so I walked over to him. He smiled the moment he saw me
"Harin, have you finished your homework yet?"
"Yeah."
"Come sit for a moment."
I sat beside him, and he looked unusually thoughtful.
"You know… Chairman heard about your midterm results, I didn't expect him to react that strongly, but he was surprisingly impressed."
"Impressed? Really? But why would the chairman care about my grades?"
"Well… I might have talked about you a little too often. I told him you always ranked first in your class and how responsible, how mature you are… And he said he's proud of you even though you're not his family."
Hearing that made my face warm.
"Harin… I know it might be early for me to ask this, but have you thought about your future? Your career, I mean."
"My career? Not really… I've never thought that far."
"I see... Actually, Harin, there's something I've been meaning to tell you."
"Hmm?"
"You see, there's nothing more I hope as a father than to see you succeed… I'm growing old day by day and you're the only daughter I have."
"What are you trying to say, dad?"
"I've been meaning to tell you this… actually… the Chairman has followed your academic growth since you were ten. And from everything he's seen… he believes you have potential, Harin."
"What? Really? Why you didn't told me anything about this before?"
"Well… it was supposed to be a secret. I didn't want to put any pressure on you."
I didn't know what to say.
"And also, Harin… the Chairman said… he would like to take you under his wing and raise you as part of his family."
My breath caught. That was the last thing I expected to hear.
But before I could process it—
"Absolutely not!"
Both my father and I froze.
It was my mother.
Her face pale and trembling. I had never seen her look that furious, not even once in my life. Her breathing was uneven.
"Haneul—"
"Mom? Are you alright?"
As if she suddenly realized how she looked, she quickly straightened her posture, forcing a smile.
"A-ah… nothing, sweetheart. I just… I just got startled, that's all."
She walked closer, eyes fixed on my father.
"Kang-min… what are you saying to Harin so suddenly? You're joking, right?"
Her voice sounded light, but her tone was sharp.
I looked at my father.
"Y-Yeah… maybe I'm a bit tired, Harin, just forget what I said, alright?"
"O-Okay."
And just like that, the conversation ended. They both pretended nothing happened, so I thought there was nothing to worry about.
But later that night, when I woke up feeling thirsty and went to the kitchen for water, I heard their voices. Their room door was slightly open, and their tones were nothing like the calm conversation from before.
"Hey, Kang-min. Look at me. Have you lost your mind?"
"What you mean, Haneul?"
"You know what I'm talking about. The thing you said to Harin earlier, why are you telling her that?"
I froze.
Slowly, I stepped closer, careful not to make a sound.
"What's wrong of me telling her that? Harin's got bright future waiting for him?"
"Bright future you said? You just want her to follow the same path as you, don't you?"
"…Is that wrong?"
"Yes. It is. I don't want her anywhere near that life."
My heart dropped. Are they fighting… again? Why does mom sound like that…?
"You promised me, didn't you, Kang-min? That if we were going to keep living like this… you wouldn't drag Harin into that company."
"But our daughter has so much potential. It would be a shame if it wasn't used in the right way, don't you think?"
"I don't care about that."
"Haneul, Harin didn't even seem bothered. Why are you acting like this?"
"Harin is a good kid! If you tell her to do something, she'll do it. Not because she wants to, but because she doesn't want to disappoint you. Did you think about that? Of course you didn't. You're barely here anyway."
"That's rich coming from you. You're saying it like I've been neglecting both of you this whole time."
"Isn't that exactly what you've been doing? Tell me, how many times in the last few years have you missed her birthday? How many times weren't you here when she needed you the most?"
"How many times do I need to explain? I've been doing all this for the sake of our family—"
"Yeah, yeah, that same excuse. I'm tired of hearing it, Kang-min. Completely tired."
My heart started pounding painfully.
"You see… I've been thinking about this for a long time. Don't you think we should stop pretending?"
"…Why are you bringing this up now?"
"I'm being serious. I've grown tired already. Do you know how much it pains me whenever Harin asks about you? I'm tired of making excuses for you."
"Don't you think it's time to tell Harin the truth, Kang-min?"
"Haneul, keep your voice down. Harin might hear us."
"Why? Are you scared? I'm tired of pretending to love you in front of Harin… when the truth is our love died long ago."
My breath stopped.
"Didn't we agree, that we'd keep things this way until Harin grew up a little?"
"We agreed. But you broke the promise!"
"We agreed that if we were going to pretend, you would never drag Harin into your world.
But look at you. First you ruin our marriage, and now you want to take Harin from me too?"
"Haneul—"
"If it weren't for Harin wishing for us to be together… I wouldn't have to suffer through this pretense anymore, watching you abandon us for your work every single day."
I froze. My shoulders shook as tears welled up. Did they… really fake their happiness all this time? Was I the reason they were unhappy? Did I caused this?
I covered my mouth, tears spilling silently.
Was everything fake? All the little moments of happiness we had these past few years… was it all just an act for me?
"I'm tired. Let's not pretend anymore Kang-min…"
Was it really because of me… that they stayed together? Did my wish… cause all this pain? Would things have been better if I hadn't told them what I wanted back then? If I hadn't wished for us to stay together… would they have been happier?
"…Kang-min. I think it's better if we just divo—."
I didn't hear the rest. My legs moved before my mind could think.
I ran.
Down the hall. Out the front door. My vision blurred with tears.
I ran into the cold night, my heart shattered with every step.
Because I couldn't bear to hear another word.
I couldn't stand the truth.
Because everything I believed in…
everything I held onto….
everything I loved…
was a lie.
_____
I didn't know where I was running. I just… wanted to go somewhere quiet. I walked for hours until my legs hurt.
Eventually, I ended up at a bus stop. It was completely empty. The moment I reached the shelter, I dropped onto the bench. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I buried my face in my hands and cried quietly.
I thought no one would notice me.
"Are you okay?"
A gentle voice broke the silence.
When I looked up, I saw a man with warm eyes and smile. Beside him was his wife, she looked just as kind. And next to her, holding her hand, stood a small boy with fluffy hair and round, chubby cheeks. He couldn't have been more than four.
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That was the first time I met Haemin and his parents.
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I don't have many regrets in life.
But this moment… is one of the deepest regrets I carry in my heart. The one that will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Because if they didn't show kindness to me that night.
If they had just walked past and left me alone…
Haemin's parents would probably still be alive today.