Moving with crisp precision, the six girls piled into the car. Seeing this, Hachiman and Shino shrugged and climbed into the driver's and passenger's seats.
"So, why did you guys think Sinon and I were an old man and woman?"
"Hey! Don't phrase it weirdly like that!"
"Sir! Because the atmosphere between you two yesterday was so much like a mature romance, we assumed you must be close to thirty!"
"We foolishly concluded that for us, who are ostensibly the same age as Sinon-san, pulling off that kind of dynamic would be impossible even if we tried!"
"We believed that such an atmosphere requires the experience of a veteran of love!"
"Wait, but Shana-san seems really popular. Isn't he experienced for a twenty-one-year-old?"
"Ah, true. He has that vibe."
"Which means the weird one is..."
The six pairs of eyes fixed intently on Shino.
"W-What?"
"Sinon-san, may we ask a few questions?"
"What, all of a sudden? Well, I don't mind."
"For example, do you have a plushie at home that you've named after Shana-san?"
Shino thought of Hachiman-kun and her heart skipped a beat.
"Do you greet this plushie diligently every day?"
Shino thought of Hachiman-kun and her cheeks relaxed.
"Do you pretend it's Shana-san and have conversations with it?"
Shino thought of Hachiman-kun and turned bright red.
"Do you project Shana-san onto it and indulge in delusions you couldn't tell anyone about?"
Shino thought of Hachiman-kun, looked at the real Shana's face, and covered her own face with her hands.
"Sinon-san, you are out! Totally out!"
"Sinon-san... you're a closet pervert despite appearances, aren't you..."
"N-No! It's just... I happened to get this little guy as a prize in a game during Christmas, and..."
And then, shockingly, Shino pulled Hachiman-kun out of her bag.
"""Eh? A Shana-san plushie?"""
"Y-You... Why on earth did you bring that thing along..." Hachiman said, his cheek twitching violently.
"B-Because! It looked like I'd be home late today, and I thought he might get lonely all by himself at the house..."
"Wait, you took that thing to school too?"
[ There's no way I'd get lonely over something like that. Shino really is a worrier. ]
"""It spoke!?"""
It seemed Shino had left Hachiman-kun's switch on. The doll suddenly stood up and spoke.
[ Yo, Original. Long time no see. I missed you. ]
Then, Hachiman-kun raised a little hand and waved piko-piko at Hachiman.
"I didn't particularly want to see you, though..."
[ Don't be so cold. You're actually jealous that I get to be with Shino, aren't you? ]
"You definitely aren't a copy of me. Your thinking is clearly biased toward Shino."
[ My registered Master is Shino, so that's obvious. ]
"Dammit... That idiot sister of mine, what kind of thing did she build..."
Eva and the others, who had been watching this exchange, seemed to snap back to reality and began firing questions at Hachiman like a machine gun.
"Shana-san, what is this child?"
"No matter how you look at it, isn't this Shana-san?"
"Isn't it clearly speaking with its own will?"
"Wow, where is this sold? I want one so bad!"
"But isn't it super expensive?"
"Hey little guy, what's your name?"
[ I'm Hachiman-kun. Nice to meet you, Saki, Kana, Shiori, Moe, Lisa, Milana. ]
Hachiman-kun pointed to Eva, Sophie, Rosa, Anna, Tanya, and Toma in order, reciting their real names smoothly. The six girls were stunned into silence.
"Oi, you. How do you know Eva and the others' names? Even I don't know who is who."
[ You've got a long way to go, Original. These guys competed in the Inter-High that Leafa appeared in recently. Their individual matches were okay, but they were a weird bunch who were totally hopeless in the team battles. ]
"So that's it... Hey, you guys, apparently that's how he knows. Ah... this is getting ridiculously chaotic. Let's organize the situation."
Hachiman, trying to manage the descent into total chaos, decided to explain things to Eva's group.
"I didn't intend to give my real name, but it can't be helped. I am Hikigaya Hachiman. This is Asada Shino. And this... is Hachiman-kun. As for him, just think of him as something like me. The 'Leafa' mentioned earlier is a friend of mine. Since she was in the Inter-High for a certain competition, it seems your faces and names were input into his data during that process. He was a prize from a private Christmas event we held recently, and now he lives at Shino's house. Does that explain most of it?"
The six girls nodded vigorously. They introduced themselves properly, and Shino did the same.
"Right. Now that things have calmed down—Shino, turn that thing off and put it back in your bag."
[ Well, that seems best for now. See you later, Shino. ]
"Yeah. See you later, Hachiman-kun."
As Shino stowed the doll away, Hachiman turned to her.
"Hey, Shino. I'm punishing you later."
"S-Sorry..."
Shino, seemingly aware that she had messed up, apologized meekly. Seeing this, Saki and the others chimed in.
"Sinon-san, you're safe, you're safe!"
"If you have a kid like that at home, of course you'd say hello to it."
"And talk to it."
"I mean, it actually reacts right in front of you! It's only natural for delusions to expand!"
"We're the same age, so we understand the feeling!"
"Still... I'm so jealous. The difference between us..."
Sensing the conversation was drifting in a weird direction again, Hachiman addressed the group.
"Anyway, today is basically a victory celebration, so let's get back to the original objective. We're heading to the reserved restaurant. Feel free to order whatever you like."
"""Yes! Thank you very much!"""
With the conversation finally settled, Hachiman drove to their destination. Upon arrival, they were guided to the largest table in the restaurant, a twelve-seater. Hachiman looked around the interior, noting the size of the table.
"There are some eight-person tables, but I guess those are usually taken by groups of six or so. Makes sense."
"Well, it's nice and spacious, isn't it?"
"True. Alright, let's just sit wherever."
Hachiman turned his eyes back to their table, only to find Saki and the others already seated, lined up neatly on one side.
"...There are only eight of us. We could just sit four and four."
"No good! If we do that, we'll fight over who gets to sit next to Hachiman-san!"
"I-Is that so..."
"Yes! Our goal is to get along!"
"You guys look like you get along plenty well already..."
"Yes! The coach told us the same thing today with a surprised look on his face!"
"Right. Well, fine then."
Hachiman gave a satisfied nod. When it came time to order, he didn't hesitate to choose the cat-shaped menu items Yukino had told him about. The other seven chatted happily about what they wanted.
This is going to be a long afternoon, Hachiman thought, casually gazing out at the scenery outside.
Then, he spotted a familiar duo across the street, and the blood drained from his face.
"This is bad... Asuna is one thing, but why is Yukino here..."
"Asuna? Yukino?"
Hearing his mutter, Shino looked out the window too.
"Ah, you're right, it's Asuna. But they look like they're arguing... No, she's trying desperately to stop the person she's with?"
(And did Hachiman just say 'Yukino'? I feel like I've heard that name somewhere...)
Shino thought about the name but couldn't place it immediately. Outside, just as Shino observed, Asuna was frantically trying to hold back Yukino, who was marching toward them.
Hachiman recalled what Asuna had said yesterday.
'Rarely, Yukino actually invited me to go out, just the two of us.'
And Hachiman had heard about this shop from Yukino.
"So that's what happened..."
Hachiman deduced that Asuna, likely dragged out by Yukino without knowing the destination, had realized Yukino was heading for the very shop where Hachiman was, and was now trying to stop her to prevent a disaster. Of course, his deduction was spot on.
(Bad, this is bad! Why today of all days? I should have checked beforehand... Ah! Hachiman-kun is definitely there... and did he spot us? But this is bad, if we keep going, Yukino will notice!)
Thinking this, Asuna called out to Yukino.
"H-Hey, I'm actually not that hungry yet, so why don't we go shopping somewhere first?"
"Is that so? Didn't you say you were hungry just a moment ago, Asuna?"
"D-Did I? No, yeah, must have been a misunderstanding! I'm totally fine still, okay?"
"If you say so... I suppose we can wait a little longer."
Yukino turned back toward the shop where Hachiman was, looking reluctant to leave.
In that instant, Yukino's eyes met Hachiman's perfectly.
They locked eyes.
(KYAAAAAAAH!) Asuna screamed internally.
"Crap..." Hachiman muttered inside the shop.
Yukino silently grabbed Asuna's hand and initiated an assault on the restaurant. The force was tremendous; Asuna couldn't resist at all and was dragged straight inside.
"Welcome! Table for two?"
"Yes, two. But excuse me, I see an acquaintance over there. May we join them? There seem to be empty seats."
"Over there? At Hikigaya-sama's table? Yes, that is fine."
"Looks like it's fine. Isn't that wonderful, Asuna?"
"A-Ahaha..."
Yukino marched purposefully toward Hachiman's table. Behind her, Asuna was furiously pressing her hands together, silently apologizing to Hachiman. Hachiman signaled back with his eyes—It's okay, I understand the situation—and Asuna nodded in relief.
"You look like you're having quite a lot of fun, haven't seen you in a while, Hachiman-kun."
"O-Oh... You two... well, sit down... please."
"Now then, I wonder what kind of excuse you'll offer me? It feels like we're back in the old days. I'm looking forward to it."
"R-Right..."
The chaotic situation, which had seemed to settle for a moment, appeared far from over.
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