Friday of the first week ended two hours early. With time to spare, I decided to walk home—*purely to admire scenery I'd previously overlooked*, not because I'd lost my student transit card. Let that be clear.
The short wall where I'd faceplanted weeks ago loomed ahead, its memory etched painfully in my mind. Unpleasant associations aside, I slowed my pace, then stopped entirely beside the brick barrier.
Two meters tall (maybe less), the moss-speckled wall partitioned our street from a narrow alley. Like all urban rumor mills, its surface was tattooed with garish graffiti and layered ads—a chaotic collage of reds and blues that somehow achieved a perverse beauty. In this hyper-connected age, who still scoured walls for information? Yet this clash of digital modernity and analog decay birthed a strange allure.
After confirming no gum or suspicious goo clung to the bricks, I tested a leap. Pathetic. Even with a running start and hand scramble, clearing it demanded Herculean effort.
But that white-haired girl had vaulted it effortlessly—*no wall contact*. Sixty centimeters was an impressive vertical jump; eighty signaled freakish talent. Two meters? Not even kangaroos, Earth's jumping champions, cleared 1.8 meters.
"Jiaozi, could you clear this wall in one jump?" I asked Wu Yanxin—who'd "coincidentally" missed her bus to walk with me.
No joke: I'd lose a fight to her.
Don't let her delicate frame fool you. She'd pinned street thugs with one hand. Me? Two hands, easy. But jumping? No way.
"Hmm? Bet I can!" She shoved her stack of books into my arms. "And stop calling me Jiaozi!" She cracked her knuckles.
The nickname stemmed from her winter solstice birthday—*Dongzhi*, when families devour dumplings (饺子). Since only elders used pet names, she hated me "stealing seniority." Naturally, I leaned in.
"Jiaozi! Jiaozi! Jiaozi!" I chanted. She flipped me off, then faced the wall.
With a sharp *"Hiyah!"* she planted her left foot, kicked off the wall with her right, and hauled herself atop the bricks. Steady as a gymnast, she smirked down. "Well? Impressed, peasant?"
Just as she struck her conqueror's pose, maple leaves erupted in applause—a sudden gust of wind.
"W-whoa! Miaomiao! Catch me!" She wobbled precariously. Two meters wasn't deadly, but a fall would hurt.
I dropped the books and braced. *Please don't fall. Male-female contact taboo!* The wind died as quickly as it came. Balance restored, she thrust a hand toward me, bellowing her favorite League of Legends kill quote: **"All shall kneel before the Iron Revenant!"**
Mordekaiser. Wu Yanxin's main. A thousand games wielding his *Mace of Ruination* to crush top-laners' dreams. Who'd guess the monster in iron armor was this slender girl?
"Okay, Iron Lord, descend before you—"
*"Meow."*
A ginger cat materialized on the wall, rubbing against Wu Yanxin's ankle. Her kryptonite: harmless fluffballs. She froze.
The wind chose that moment to return.
*"Aaaah—!"*
**Cat Support and Janna combo: Executed!**
I lunged, but gravity won. She hit the ground one foot first before crashing into me. The impact nearly toppled us, but miraculously, no bones broke.
"Well, well. The thousand-game Mordekaiser got solo-killed by a cat."
"Sorry you have to carry me because of my stupidity... Hey! Don't grope my butt!"
"It's your thigh."
"Still taking liberties!" Her whisper scorched my ear. *Awkward.*
*I'm carrying your injured self, and you accuse me? Fine. If I'm getting blamed...* I gave her buttock a deliberate squeeze. Firm. Springy. Not bad. "What butt? Mine's perkier."
Silence. Then—*fingers locked around my throat.* Before I could react, teeth sank into my shoulder.
*Did the "no butt" comment break her?*
"Stop biting! Ow!"
"Once more and I'll— Gah!"
"I swear I'll— Agh!"
"Bite again and I squeeze!" She finally released my shoulder—now throbbing. *Am I your chew toy?!*
Just as I thought the torture ended, her legs scissored around my waist, koala-climbing higher.
*She's aiming for my ear!* One chomp and I'd become "One-Ear Du"!
I twisted, spun, and shut my eyes—planning to mask my face the whole walk home. *Wu Yanxin! Do you see the stares we're getting?!*
My eyes worked fine, but my brain's filter didn't. So—*who the hell discards half-eaten ice cream on the sidewalk?!* Thank you for not leaving actual shit, but this "stepping on poop" simulation sucked!
The moment my shoe hit the sticky mess, I became an astronaut on the moon—zero balance.
Soft landing. Very soft... Wu Yanxin was atop me. What was beneath?
"Idiot! Watch where you're going! Get off!" A melodic voice, sharp with rage.
We'd crashed into someone.
"Sorry! I didn't mean— Wait. *You!* White-Haired She-Monkey!" Apologies died as I recognized the girl beneath us—the knee-to-face culprit!
She wore our school uniform. A freshman, like us. Yet I'd never seen her snow-white hair in three days of classes.
"She-Monkey?! Who're you calling a monkey, trash? Get off!"
Delicate features. Slim build like Wu Yanxin's, but curvier. Not the time to notice.
*Enemies meet, eyes blaze.* Knee-vengeance demanded repayment.
"Remember me?" Our faces hovered inches apart. Her breath hitched—*nervous?*
"You? Why would I know trash like you? Move!"
"Tuesday morning. By this wall. Your knee massacred an innocent pedestrian." I pointed to my healed cheek, fury simmering—when Wu Yanxin yanked my collar.
"Miaomiao! Pinning a girl this long? Apologize now!" How did her slender arm possess such Mordekaiser-like strength?!
"So you're... that roadblock?" the white-haired girl murmured.
*Roadblock?!* Ten thousand alpacas stampeded through my mind—*I'm the roadblock?!* I'm the goddamn *HANDSOME ROADBLOCK!* If I'm a roadblock, you're a blind moron!