Cold….. IT... IT'S SO COLD.. COLD
ELA…..HELPS ME… ELA… ELA… ELA
The cold woke me up before the pain.
Or maybe the pain wasn't really there anymore.
Just an impression, a memory of suffering, like a distant dream, a chaotic landscape but so peacefully, I remember, I remember that day when I met you.
ELA.
I'm really going to die.
So this is what death looks like?
I couldn't see anything anymore.
Everything was black.
Not only around me, but inside me too, empty and without support, I felt free and peaceful.
A dense, moving darkness that gently attracted me.
No one was going to miss me.
Fortunately.
I'll be one less problem for them.
I'm sorry
Asmara, joy, "friends"
Heavy breathing mingled with mine.
A breath?
Not mine.
Someone else was breathing with me.
In me.
- Finally... here you are. A real problem
The voice.
-MOM?, JOY?, ELA?, ELA?, WHO'S THERE?
I know her though.
This voice, I know whose it is.
I would recognize her among a thousand.
His presence crawled into my skull like a spider under my skin.
IT'S HIS FAULT...
Dirt
- You took my friends, my team, my teammates... You're going to pay for this.
My throat screamed, but no sound came out.
My body was filled with rage.
My fingers were moving without me wanting them to.
My heart was beating too fast, too hard.
- You have a strong body, Roum. A tough mind. I don't like that, I need your body and for that you need to get a good night's sleep.
I wanted to scream again, no, no, but he forced me to smile.
A twisted, cold smile.
Shadows moved around.
My body was shaking, I saw myself coming back together piece by piece.
The shadows, They laughed, full of unhealthy joy, prostrating themselves before me in front of the "inhabitant".
In front of him.
- The King is back!
- The Dark Master!
-freedom, liberty
Their voices grate on my ears.
I felt like throwing up.
But I couldn't.
I was no longer me.
I was an intruder in my own body
I was… I was Nothing.
The resident raised my hand and looked at it.
He cracked my knuckles, fascinated.
- Perfect. So close to the flesh, so warm.
- Humans are wonderful containers.
Then he took a step.
Only one.
The ground shook.
The shadows retreated, cackling.
Something was rumbling in my head.
A memory.
Voices.
Joy. Asmara.
Their screams.
Their faces.
MY emotions were trying to come up.
She came all at once
Sad, angry, frustrated, disgusted with myself, I hate myself, a BOSS, HOW COULD I DARE CLAIM THIS TITLE, AUSELESS LIKE ME, WHO CAN'T EVEN KEEP HIS BOOOOOOOOOOOOO BODY
ROUM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
I felt my heart beating wrong.
Like…. I could crush the earth with one hand.
- Surrender, whispered the "inhabitant".
- You don't belong here anymore.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
NEVERRRRRRRRRRRRR
But my conscience refused.
I refuse to start again
I moved my hands on my own, tracing in the air, swimming to come up.
Shadows emerged from the darkness, sneering, taking human form.
There were too many of them covering me and pulling me down.
Anger. Disgust. Even Asmara.
I wanted to close my eyes, but they remained wide open.
I have to go back up
- Look at them, Roum.
- Let yourself go, it's so hard outside, I want to offer eternal peace, take it.
- GET OUT OF MY BODY…, I screamed inside.
A snort tore through my skull.
- what can you change, eh, sleep or die, it's your only choice now.
And suddenly, I saw myself.
In front of me.
My reflection.
Rome.
The old me.
Eyes full of fear.
Mouth half open.
The resident burst out laughing.
- See? Even your mind is falling away. Nothing remains of you. You remain the same, a little anger won't change anything.
And then something cracked.
A memory.
A light.
ELA yelling at me.
that pulls me back.
protect me all the time.
And this sentence:
"You don't have to be perfect to be loved. Just be human, just you, unlucky Roum."
Human.
The word hit me like a hammer blow to the head.
And in that word, I came back.
Stuck under all these shadows
I was there
It was me
A monstrous pain exploded in my chest.
My heart was beating against the will of the inhabitant.
I tore myself apart from the inside, screaming
- It's useless, he yelled.
- I take back what is mine, it is MY Body, even if I have to end up in pieces.
He tried to drown me in his shadows, voices, foreign memories: centuries of blood, faces, cries of victims, burning domes.
But I got through them.
I swallowed them.
I made them mine.
And the forest began to burn with a black light.
The shadows screamed.
I grabbed my throat.
They were retreating, disintegrating.
Their bodies melt in a cloud of ash and blood.
- Stop! shouted the inhabitant. You're going to destroy everything!
- Then I will destroy everything.
My body began to tremble.
My skin was tearing, leaving black threads running.
I become a shadow
Each heartbeat sent out a wave that swept through the forest.
The twisted trees collapsed, the shadows melted like paper.
Asmara appeared in the distance.
Injured.
Lying on the floor
Blood on the forehead.
She looked at me without understanding.
- Roum?
His voice…
It was enough to hold me back.
The inhabitant tried to regain the upper hand.
But I won't let it happen anymore.
I pulled him with me, into the abyss.
Tearing out the shadows with my fangs
And I dived.
Torn
Chew
Again
Again
And again
Without being satisfied
A scream.
His.
Then nothing.
Silence.
When I opened my eyes, everything was quiet.
The forest was nothing more than a field of ashes.
The shadows were gone.
The air smelled of hot metal.
I was breathing.
I was alive.
I shouldn't have.
I looked at my torso: no injuries.
My skin was intact, new.
But something was wrong.
In my still open hand, dark filaments moved, like black roots.
- What is this horror?, I whispered
I stood up slowly, unsteadily.
The ground cracked beneath my feet, as if I weighed more than before.
My breath formed a black mist.
A moan made me turn my head.
Asmara .
Lying against a trunk.
Alive, but half unconscious.
I approached, my hand shaking.
- Asmara …
She opened her eyes and jumped.
- Don't come any closer, DEMON
- It's me.
She hesitated, scrutinized me for a long time.
- you? … haaaaaaaaa ahaaa HAHAHAHAHA…
Then laughed
I looked down.
- Asmara, is-
-ROUM?
Joy appeared behind her, staggering, injured.
- We have to go, Roum. Before others arrive.
His voice sounded right.
Asmara got up with difficulty,
I smile at him, despite my fatigue.
- We're leaving. Together.
"Get out of my way, you demons," Asmara yelled, before she pushed past us.
We walked in silence.
Not a word, just our footsteps in the scorched earth.
But deep down, I knew.
Something was living under my skin.
And Joy, who walked in front, was no different.
Her shadow undulated behind her, lengthening, retracting, like a snake.
She was right next to me, smiling, almost too calm.
And in my head, a voice, weak, whispered:
- Roum. Roum Roum
- It's not over.
I stopped.
Asmara continued.
- demon, demon, demon….
But my fingers were shaking.