"To think Nagisa-chan was such a shameless girl... Ugh, ugh. Huuu... This is something I never wanted to know.. Yes, I never wanted to know at all..."
A familiar mirror came into view. Beyond it, I could see Mika, hugging her knees, muttering to herself with half-dead eyes.
"...Hey, Mika?"
"Ah, you're here...? Happy birthday..."
"Uh, um. Thanks."
I thanked her since she'd wished me a happy birthday, but it was hard to find any genuine celebratory feeling in that gloomy face.
"So... was it good? No, it must have been good. Yes, it must have been good for you to be all over Nagisa-chan like that. I asked a strange question. Ahaha."
What should I say? I was happy to see Mika after so long, but it was a little sad that the feeling wasn't mutual.
She had said she hated me before, and it seemed she had seen everything that happened between Nagisa and me... I guess I'd be the same way in her shoes, so I could understand.
"You know what? You're a real piece of work."
"Suddenly?"
"I told you I wouldn't take back a dirty body like that, didn't I? Did you think I was joking? I was one hundred percent serious. And yet you say you want to maintain its purity because you might have to return it to Mika someday. Are you kidding me? If I were Nagisa-chan, I would've hit you. Yes, I really would've."
"...So by 'dirty', you meant because of the Gehenna students."
"Then what did you think I was talking about? Huh? Ugh, seriously. It's so frustrating and annoying, I could die. What does Nagisa-chan even see in someone like you..."
"Wait a minute. Mika, are you..."
A single tear trickled down Mika's cheek. Soon, the droplets turned into a stream, soaking her face.
Seeing that, I unconsciously placed a hand on the mirror, but of course, my touch couldn't reach beyond it. My favorite character was right in front of me, crying with a dark expression, looking genuinely heartbroken. And I couldn't even comfort her.
Normally, I would have made a joke about how she was most beautiful when she was crying. But Mika was in such a state that I couldn't even bring myself to say such things.
"That scrunchie is mine. It was the most precious thing in the world, a gift from Nagisa-chan. But, but if you get the same thing, it feels like Nagisa-chan is trying to erase any trace of me... *hic*. And in the middle of all that, you're going on about returning the body to me or not..."
"Mika..."
"It's annoying. I don't like it. I don't like a single thing about it. My place isn't there anymore, so what are you going to return? What are you trying to get me out of here for, anyway?"
"For you, Mika. I want you to be happy—"
"...No, I don't need it. After today, I won't be looking for you anymore. Yes, it's time to admit it."
"Admit what? What are you suddenly talking about...?"
"The real Mika is you. Not some witch like me that no one ever looks for."
At Mika's declaration, I was momentarily at a loss for words. For Mika, who craved affection, to completely lose the one person who sought her out—perhaps this situation was inevitable.
I wasn't enough. I couldn't be enough.
The moment she and Nagisa grew apart, Mika's heart had already begun to rot from the inside.
"Ahaha... This is the last, the very last warning. No, maybe it's advice. You have to doubt everything. It's not like you'll listen to anything I say anyway, but at least stop saying you'll return this body. I will never, ever take it back."
Why did Mika's words sound like she was begging me to doubt her?
...In the first place, was she even the Mika I knew?
"Mika, what on earth are you hiding?"
"Stupid. A girl's secret is most beautiful when it remains a secret."
With a bitter smile, Mika gave a small wave. I had seen a similar expression on that face several times before.
We couldn't, we shouldn't part like this. At the very least, there was one more thing I had to tell her.
"Wait. Mika! Nagisa—"
"Bye-bye."
"Nagisa prepared a gift for you today, too. You, of all people, know she's that kind of person. You know that, right?"
"How could I possibly know something like that? We're strangers."
Only then did I feel like I was starting to grasp something.
Mika, you're...
***
When I woke up from my sleep, I glanced down once and then squeezed my eyes shut.
A carelessly discarded bathrobe was draped over the foot of the bed.
The other one was probably on the floor.
The wing sticking out between my side and the bed was a little annoying. A dry laugh escaped me as I thought about how soundly I'd slept, completely entangled with Nagisa.
The memories of last night, and the memories from my dream, made my head spin. It felt like a bomb of things to think about had just gone off.
I tried to subtly move the blanket aside, but the cold air on my skin made me pull it back over myself instinctively.
Both Nagisa and I were important figures at Trinity, so we both had to attend Mass. But when I looked at my body, it was a complete mess. Nagisa, whose smooth back was all I could see, was probably in a similar state, even if not as bad as me, according to my memory.
The bedsheets were undoubtedly a wreck. How could they not be?
Amidst all this, what was with the fact that Nagisa, who was slightly taller than me, was asleep with her head buried in the nape of my neck? It made me a little disheartened, wondering if my complex about my height was that severe.
I slowly wrapped my arms around Nagisa, wondering what time it was. My mind was screaming that it was sleepy, but my body felt refreshed, which was confusing.
We had slept without even drying our hair properly. Our entire bodies were a mess from each other's dried saliva, so we'd have to shower first. It was a relief that most of these blatant kiss marks were hidden by clothes, but I wondered what to do about the ones that weren't. Could I cover them with makeup?
*Lick. Mwah.*
"...Hic."
Seriously, one of us is worried about kiss marks, and the other is trying to add another one as soon as she wakes up.
"Nagisa-chan, I told you not to leave marks where clothes won't cover..."
"...Goo' mornin', Mika-ssi."
"Hngh. Ah, this is a problem so early in the morning."
Nagisa, who had mumbled a morning greeting while nibbling on my skin, sat up slightly. Her hazel eyes looked down at me. Her tawny hair cascaded down like a waterfall, tickling me.
When Nagisa smiled, I could feel my face heat up. From this angle in the morning, Nagisa was so stunning she could be called a goddess without exaggeration. And then, she leaned down and left a light kiss on my lips.
"It was truly the best."
"U-uh, yes. That, that might make me a little happy."
"Shall we go wash up together?"
"...Just washing, right? I don't think we have that much time to spare."
"Well, now...? What happens in the shower is a secret only we will know. Fufu."
With Christmas as the turning point, the relationship between Nagisa and me had reached a new stage. That much seemed certain.
***
The rest of Christmas Day passed more normally than I expected.
Before entering the bathroom, I was dumbfounded to see it wasn't even 6 AM yet. As I wondered how many hours we'd even slept, I became Nagisa's dessert when she argued that it was actually a good thing...
The kiss marks not covered by clothing were first concealed with makeup, then hidden with a scarf Nagisa had made herself. I knew she had marked those borderline-visible spots with this in mind, but telling me to wear a scarf all day was a bit much, wasn't it?
After spending time at the cathedral, our destination was my office. Even if others were enjoying the holiday to the fullest, there were always people in the world who couldn't. It just so happened that I was one of them.
It's an eternal, unchanging law that if I take a day off today, the me of tomorrow will suffer twice as much.
If there was a silver lining, it was that the workload was incomparably lighter than usual. As Nagisa and I sat across from each other doing paperwork, lunchtime was suddenly just around the corner.
Here, I must mention the noble sacrifice of our ETO's Director-General Yukino. The members of the ETO, who were suppressing troublemakers all over Gehenna and Trinity for Christmas, were probably the ones suffering the most today.
After finishing a lunch course at a French restaurant I had reserved in advance, Nagisa led me straight back home.
"...Ahaha, Nagisa-chan. Didn't you say you had a date course planned?"
"Of course I did. Yes, there was definitely something like that. I'm just scrapping it."
With those words, Nagisa interlocked her fingers with mine.
"What we need right now is a nap, don't you think? As for a date, the most important thing is that you are by my side, Mika-ssi. Just having you here with me is more than enough to make me happy."
"...Hey, this time it's really just a nap, right? Huh?"
"Yes? Of course. I don't know what you take me for, Mika-ssi. Did you really think I was such a classless woman as to pounce on you for such an embarrassing act in broad daylight?"
My honest answer was yes, but my body chose to believe her no.
Fortunately, it seemed Nagisa genuinely wanted to take a nap. In lighter clothes, she snuggled into my arms and, not long after, fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.
Feeling Nagisa's hair slip softly through my fingers, I too, sought sleep.
Today was undoubtedly the worst Christmas, but at the same time, it was also the best.
***