I had learned from experience that you shouldn't carelessly eat things other people give you.
But I had made the mistake of trusting Rumi's cooking skills too much. Reijo's warning that one shouldn't place too much faith in Rumi's cooking unless it was for a formal reception now felt bitterly resentful.
If you were going to say that, you could have told me *before* I became a victim...
"Hey, Mika... I'm so sorry. Okay? It was fine when I ate it, so I didn't know it would be that bad. I'm really, really sorry!"
"Y-You..."
*You crazy woman, is that really what you say to someone who's been crying their eyes out and crossing the threshold of hell every other second right in front of you?*
...I probably shouldn't say that out loud, right?
"If you're sorry, *khm*. Please, just... make me some bingsu... It's so spicy..."
"Ah, okay! I'll make you the best bingsu—"
"I don't need the best or anything else... *Hngh*. Just as fast as you can, please...?"
"Yes."
Why did Rumi jump in surprise and give such a crisp, formal reply when all I did was offer a gentle smile? Wondering about that, I checked my face with my phone.
"..."
The first thought that came to mind was, *'Ah, this is going to ruin my makeup.'* I really am something else.
But still, even though putting on makeup is a pain, doing the basics is good for the skin... This is a body I have to return to our princess one day, so it wouldn't do not to take proper care of it.
Well, I figured the whole "I won't take it back if it's tainted" thing was just her being pouty. Seeing her own body in a die-hard relationship with her childhood friend... yeah, I can see how that might be a bit sickening for her.
"...Mika-ssi, are you really okay? Your halo was flickering, so I thought something really serious had happened."
"No... something serious *did* happen, Reijo-chan... *sniffle*..."
"Ah, well. Ahem. Yes, it did."
I wondered why she was acting so cautiously when she hadn't done anything wrong, but another glance at my phone screen made me understand immediately.
This wasn't just a few tears welling up; they were streaming down my face.
*Click.*
"...Um, Mika-ssi?"
"My finger slipped. Yep, I'll delete it right away."
"..."
Am I really going to delete it?
Are you kidding me? Never.
I wasn't unaware that the princess is prettiest when she cries, but seeing it like this, she looked unbelievably cute, delicate, and lovely, making me want to coddle her endlessly. How on earth could someone look so noble and holy without a single unsightly feature, even while sobbing their eyes out? It was absurd.
Since I'm not one to cry easily, I doubted I'd ever cry like this again, so I just had to capture it in a photo. I'm being completely serious—it was a masterpiece worthy of being kept as a family heirloom for generations.
Pushing those silly thoughts aside, I took a tissue from my handbag and was wiping my face when Reijo hesitantly asked me a question.
"Um, I saw you eating level 3 just fine earlier... Just how spicy was level 4?"
"...Hm? Level 4? What are you talking about? *Hooo*."
"Pardon?"
"There's no way that was level 4. *Sniff*. There must have been some kind of mistake. Rumi-chan probably came up with some kind of business scheme... right, one of those where they offer prize money for an impossible challenge to rip people off. Hmm... something like, if you succeed in finishing a whole bowl of the 'purgatory' level, you get the base prize plus all the entry fees from the previous participants... Yes, I'm sure of it. Definitely."
"Mika-ssi, that is an insult to President Rumi's culinary spirit. Please retract it."
"Reijo-chan, I just took a few live tours of the underworld after eating Rumi-chan's cooking. Yes. In this situation, do you really think I'm going to agree with you? I'm the victim. These tears right here are the proof."
Where in the world is there evidence more undeniable than a victim's tears?
Therefore, Rumi is guilty! Absolutely guilty. So she must offer me bingsu as compensation at once.
"...Ahem. As I said before, the President meant no harm. Sometimes, during her new menu development process, monstrous creations that one fears to even bring to their lips can emerge."
"Ahaha, right. And today, I just happened to be the sacrifice, didn't I?"
Ah, my tongue is still tingling. I seriously thought I was going to lose my mind.
The thing Haruna fed me before was so vile that my soul nearly left my body the moment I swallowed it, so at least I didn't have time to taste it. But this was worse because it was just pure spice. Spiciness is a form of pain, and because of that pain, my mind would flicker in and out, making it impossible to even faint.
"Haaa, when is Rumi-chan coming back...?"
"If she went to make bingsu... she probably headed to the merchants' bingsu shop. We don't have the ingredients for it here, after all."
"Then no matter how fast she is, it'll take quite some—"
"Mika, you're not dead yet, are you?! Here's your fresh fruit bingsu!!"
"—time, won't it...? What, how was she so fast?"
"It was my mistake, so it's only natural that I do my best to fix it, right? So... here, hurry and eat this to soothe your tongue."
Rumi, who had disappeared, returned with a bingsu in what felt like less than ten minutes. Factoring in travel time, just how quickly did she make this?
What's more, it was so beautifully arranged that it was infuriating. It's not like bingsu is a dessert that requires exceptional skill, but to make something like this in such a short time is clearly a mark of talent.
So why would such a talented girl do such a terrible thing to me...?
"Hooo... Thanks for rushing, Rumi-chan."
I scooped up a spoonful of the milky ice and brought it to my mouth. The moment it touched my tongue, the ice melted away, soothing the furious muscle.
Next, I ate the pineapple and peach on the side, then dug out a large chunk from the side of the vanilla ice cream on top.
It was so damn delicious that I felt twice as angry.
"Rumi-chan... I will remember what happened today for a long, long time."
"That's a bit petty... Ahaha, no, no. I was wrong. So please don't glare at me like that. You'll hurt my feelings."
"If you're really sorry, go get two more spoons."
"Huh? Why all of a sudden... oh my, are you asking me to eat with you?"
Rumi, who said that with a somehow surprised look, slowly broke into a grin. As her face drew closer to mine, I gently pressed the tip of my finger against her forehead and pushed her back.
"Because I told you I was full... There's no such convenient thing as a separate stomach for dessert. Yes, so you two will have to help me eat this."
"Fu, fufufu. My, I knew from the moment I met you that you had an exceptionally kind personality, Mika... I can't take it anymore. Mika, won't you be my little sister starting today? Hm? I'll make you lots of delicious food."
"...Hey, are you planning to use me as a lab rat?"
Startled by my question, Rumi shook her head frantically, waving her hands in denial.
"That's absolutely not my intention! I mean it, please believe me. I just felt a little sorry and thought I should take better care of you, that's all."
"Ahaha. I really don't know whether to believe you or not."
"Oh, really. You shouldn't tease people like that, Mika."
To be fair, Rumi had made a pretty big mistake this time, but when I came with Haruna last time, the reception was excellent. Honestly, when it came to taste alone, it was hardly inferior to the hospitality at Hyunryumon.
"Alright. I'll trust you just this once, Rumi-chan."
"Great, little sister Mika. From now on, you can count on this unni. I'll make you as much delicious food as you want!" (TN: Unni is a term a female uses to address an older female.)
"Hey, if you're going to do that, wouldn't it be better to make Haruna-chan your little sister instead? And more importantly... we're in the same grade, you know? Yes. What do you mean, 'unni'?"
...Ah, anyway, thanks to this bingsu, I feel like I can live again.
I really learned the meaning of the phrase "give the disease and then the medicine" here today.
"If you just look at our height difference, we'd look like a normal older and younger sister—"
"...I will kill you, Akeshiro Rumi."
"Eek."
After the incident—which my tongue would resent me for calling a 'small' incident—passed, we resumed my original purpose for visiting Rumi: developing the tteokbokki recipe.
However, that damned level 4 spicy *mala*? I will never, ever, not even if I die, bring that to my lips again until a proper recipe is completed.
...Still, the roasted goose Rumi made for dinner was the best. It was so good I thought I might fall in love.
***