A few hours later, Amon was sitting with a bored expression. His legs were spread wide and stretched out nonchalantly as he leaned back in his chair, his head tilted slightly upward. He was wearing an oversized dark suit with a white shirt and black tie, and the crystal monocle rested on his right eye as always.
"Hey, what happened to Hel? She was crying."
Amon opened his eyes and saw Luna upside down in his view. Her arms were crossed beneath her breasts, and her expression was slightly amused as she held back a smile.
"Nothing." Amon murmured coolly. "She just suffered from an illness called disappointment. That's what happens when you don't uproot your delusions in time, I guess."
"And what happened to you? What's wrong? Aren't your shenanigans enough to entertain you?" she asked with a sigh, shaking her head at Amon's odd habits.
"Nah. I'm just thinking." Amon replied flatly.
"Don't play with me. I know you best, dumbass." Luna walked over to him and stared straight into his eyes, then held his cheeks, her face close to his. Too close, in fact, but Amon didn't react.
Seeing Luna upside down and serious, so close to his face, he remained calm and motionless. For some reason, he felt extremely stressed. Even his usual tomfoolery was no longer funny to him, nor did it serve any purpose in avoiding what truly scared him. Something that frightened him more than nightmare creatures, the future, defilement, and unholy beasts. Even more than the secrets that haunted his existence and his corrupted self.
"I… I don't know how to be a father." He swallowed, closing his eyes tightly as he clenched his fists. "It's ridiculous that I'm scared of a child, an unborn child at that."
Luna observed him for a few seconds. A warm smile slowly appeared on her face as she lowered her head and kissed him. "How adorable and silly. But what you're afraid of isn't Evangelo. I know you best. You're afraid of responsibility, disappointment, and duty. You don't want to be a bad father, but at the same time you can't help being torn apart between your longing for your son and your ambition. You think that if you pursue your dreams, you will abandon your son. And if you do not abandon your son, then you abandon your dreams. Your heart is filled with fear and divided by uncertainty, caught between your selfish desires and your duty. Isn't that right?"
Amon opened his eyes, staring into her crimson pupils with a stunned expression, not knowing how to answer. He had no clever rebuttal, because Luna had described his worries perfectly.
"All this ridiculous chaos, the fights, festivals, gambling, and drinking. It is as if you are enjoying life for the last time because you believe that once Evangelo is born, you will never again be able to embrace your childish side, the one brimming with dreams and desires." Luna added with a soft, acquiescent smile. She had already come to terms with Amon's desires. She had always known who he was deep in his heart, after all.
"It is fine, you know. I will never compel you to change because of me. But I hope you will not think of our child that way, as if he is a burden, a chain wrapped around your neck, dragging you into the mud and denying you the chance to reach the light. I really hope so." She mumbled hesitantly, her deep crimson eyes expressing her feelings as she smiled ambivalently.
"No, that's not it, Luna." Amon bleated, covering his face.
"Is it not, really?" Luna asked, preconceived of her belief despite having no confirmation.
"I... it's not just that." Amon replied, his expression neutral and slightly bleak. "You are right, but I don't think my son is a burden or anything like that. I just don't know what to do. How to be a father, you know? I never cared about this world that much. I didn't care about the Sovereigns, corruption, gates, the Spell, or anything else. I don't know why, but I never did. But now, all of it feels so terrifying for some reason. I just can't explain it, damn it."
"You never cared about danger. You took gambles and risked your life to satisfy your desires and your thirst for high, so that your life wouldn't feel so bleak and colorless. I am aware of that, love. But now, every danger you once dismissed as insignificant feels serious, even the things you could easily destroy, right? That is because you are thinking about too many what ifs. What if a gate opens near our son? What if you are unable to protect him from nightmare creatures? What if he becomes another piece of collateral damage in the Sovereigns' war? What if the advancing horrors of the Dream Realm kill Evangelo? And not only that, you are also afraid of dying now, more than ever. You are truly terrified, because you can't trust anyone with your son's life. That is how afraid you are." Luna explained gently, understanding his complex feelings better than he did himself. When it came to others, Amon was surprisingly perceptive, but when it came to his own emotions, he was lost and blind.
"That is... how it is?" Amon frowned, uncertainty filling his expression. It was true, he supposed. He was genuinely afraid that something might happen to his son.
"What about you, then?" he asked her, his dark eyes narrowing as Luna smiled helplessly.
"I am as afraid as you are, truly. I can't help it. All I think about are my mother's absurd and cruel plans, and how much I loathe them." She paused, taking a seat and leaning back, gently caressing her belly. Her calm expression made her next words feel even more sinister and disturbing. "To the point where I want to destroy everything, until all I see are corrupted beasts roaming Ravenheart."
Amon nodded, understanding where she was coming from. He too felt deep, seething hatred. He would have preferred for Luna to give birth before challenging the Nightmare. There was no need to enter a Nightmare while pregnant and take such pointless risks, especially since that insidious woman already knew about his plan. But that twisted woman wanted to punish Luna for her defiance, even though everything was her fault. She was trying to take his son away from him so that some damned bastard could raise him. His son would grow up not knowing who his real father was, forced to call some cretin his father, while Luna would be reduced to an obedient consort of that retard.
Amon would never forget this bitterness. Ki Song tried to steal his lover and his son. So he would steal everything from her in return. Her life, her soul, her kingdom, her wealth, her dreams, her ambitions, her happiness, and her hope, until she became nothing more than what she was meant to be.
A corpse.
Patience, Amon, patience. Your time will come. He told himself with a dark look, already sensing that something bad was about to happen. His divination had confirmed it as well. Something would go wrong. But what? His son would live. Everyone would survive. He had already divined it, and fate had revealed its card. So what was it? What was he missing?
Damn it... He clenched his fists in frustration, clicking his tongue in irritation as he leaned back.
I just have to focus. Everything will be fine. I prepared for it, after all. Instead of stealing light and giving it to the people, all I need to do is steal the sun and their dreams as well, leaving them in eternal dark.
Well, that was easy to say, but executing that plan would be a real headache.
"It will be fine," Luna sighed, feeling just as stressed and exhausted as he was.
"I hope so," Amon muttered. Now he truly wished his father were here to give him advice and tell him what to do. He had always hated his nagging, but right now he needed his guidance more than anything.
"I will cook something," Luna sighed and stood up, as the oppressive silence grew heavier with each passing second. She didn't like how tense they both were. Maybe a delicious meal could improve their mood. However, she couldn't get far from the table because in an instant Amon caught her arm. His face was pale and his smile forced.
"It is fine. You are pregnant, so just rest," he said, swallowing as he stood up.
The last time Luna cooked, he had gotten diarrhea.
Sighing, Amon went to the kitchen, only to find nothing but bread, cucumbers, and tomatoes. Sighing again, he used decryption, his expression a bit thoughtful as if he were deciding what to choose. Then he nodded to himself and flicked his wrist. Fresh scavenger meat appeared in his hand, followed by potatoes, onions, peppers, salt, herbs, spices, and other ingredients, which he placed on the table.
Looks like my neighbor will starve today, he thought with a wry smile as he started cooking.
"Amon, do you have plans tomorrow?" Luna asked from the living room, her tone hopeful.
Amon knew she wanted to go out, maybe on a date. Sadly, he was busy tomorrow. "I cannot. Sorry, love. Maybe next time. I have to explore the catacombs."
"Again?" she asked with a huff.
"Yes, again. I need as much information as I can get for the nightmare," Amon confirmed calmly.
Half an hour later, he placed the plates on the table along with the cutlery, bread, and the soup he had prepared. Then he poured coffee into his cup and tea into Luna's.
The funny thing was that he always washed his hands when it came to cooking. Whether his hands were dirty from washing ingredients or salt had stuck to them because they were wet, he washed them every time without exception.
So when he saw the tea spill onto his hand, he remained motionless for a few seconds, groaned quietly, and went back to wash his hands again.
After washing them, he returned and took a seat, only to find Luna already enjoying the meal. She was stuffing her face with food, her dark, charcoal skin slightly flushed from the hot soup. Smiling faintly, he took a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped her cheek as she looked up at him, swallowing a piece of potato.
How cute, Amon thought, leaning back in his chair and sipping his coffee. Then he looked at Luna again, pursed his lips in hesitation, and exhaled softly.
"Do you think we will be good parents? I mean, we can barely take care of ourselves. We are murderers, criminals, chaotic, selfish, disturbing, and from what I understand, also inhuman. Not completely, but sooner or later, we will lose our humanity. It may take years or thousands, but it is inevitable. Humanity is weak and insignificant. Godhood transcends all."
Luna stopped eating, grimacing slightly. Her expression was daedalian and convoluted. "We will learn. We may not be the best, but at least we will do anything for him." Then she smiled, looking at him warmly. "It's not like I don't know why you built this city. You wouldn't have gone this far just for yourself. Heck, you wouldn't have even revealed its existence. The actual heir of Moirai isn't you, after all. It's Evangelo, isn't it? A king yet to be born."
Amon blinked, startled and caught off guard by her words. He genuinely hadn't expected her to know, but it seemed she really did know him best. A bittersweet smile touched his composed face like dew kissing the grass.
"Hmm... I guess." He shrugged, not confirming her words despite her knowing smile. Well, what's the point of building anything at all if it rots without anyone to inherit your legacy?
Maybe his son wouldn't want to be a king. Maybe he would want to be a traveler, a soldier, or a simple cook like Harus, enjoying life peacefully. But still, Amon would prepare the best for him. If he wished to become the ruler, then he would take the throne; if not, that was fine too.
Still, despite planning his son's future, he was lost and uncertain when it came to his own, obscured by mysteries.
Yet he wasn't preparing for the unknown he would inevitably face.
Instead, he was preparing a future where his son would be safe.
He wasn't from this world, nor did he feel any particular connection to it. But for the first time since he transmigrated, he found himself tethered to this place by a single string of fate.
Named Evangelo.
***
[A/N: Thanks, Warussy, for beta reading… Also, bro, change your name. It's weird asf.
Anyway, I was advised by Hermes_Ax and CTHULHU_YOGSOTHOT that the romance feels a bit forced and the interactions with Luna are lacking, so I hope I'm doing a good job with this. Seriously, if I'm doing something wrong or forgetting, please remind me and give advice. As long as it isn't some biting remark or hate, I welcome everything with open arms.
We also see how Luna and Amon are living. I decided to go with realism. Married life isn't exactly sunshine and rainbows, it's filled with responsibilities, anxiety, and exhaustion. Being a parent is really hard, and often they have to sacrifice a lot for us, even their future, dreams, and life. So I hope you appreciate your parents more. They're the only ones who love us unconditionally :)
Now, about my pacing… yeah, we all know it. Some chapters are around 2k words, some 3k, some even 4k or 5k, so sorry about that.
Oh, and the previous chapter can be considered an omake, guys. It's nothing serious, just daily life in Moirai, which is quite chaotic. Now that I think about it, I write the most random stuff when I'm drunk, XDD.
Well, that's it. I hope you're all healthy and not filled with poison like me. I hope your families and friends are also doing great. Luv you all, enjoy the meal!]
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