My phone blared in my ears. I groaned croakily, ignoring the sound briefly before a tempestuous emotion swirled within me, and I forced my eyes open. My hands reached out, patting the bed beside me in search of my phone which I'd left on the bed early morning as I fell asleep.
I frowned, unable to grasp a feel of my phone and grumbled as I sat up. I rotated my body over as my eyes cooperated with my ears, searching for the source of the sound. A blinding brightness flashed my eyes and I shut them reactively. Remembering the position of the brightness, I reached my limb out towards the location and patted around the area. My fingers grazed a solid object with a curved edge to it, and they grasped the object before carrying it closer to me. I opened my eyes hesitantly and slightly, remaining squinted as I tapped on my phone and the blinding shine dimmed, a relieved exhale of breath puffed out through my lips.
8:27
8:28
I gasped, my eyes nearly leaving its sockets as I scrambled through my bed sheets and sprinted to my bathroom.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm late, shit. Crap," foul words spew out of my mouth as I sprinted through my morning routine.
I had the quickest shower of my life before dressing myself with a knitwear sweater and jeans over my layers as I hurried, constantly anxious of time.
I grabbed all of my necessities, placed them in a purse, and stood before my door.
I glanced, 8:42.
I forcibly yanked my door open, before running towards the elevator as it fortunately landed on my floor instanterly. I headed inside, silently praying none else needed the elevator at the moment.
My prayers were not answered.
The elevator halted on the 5th, and my eyes nearly rolled as the steel barrier slid to opposing sides before disappearing.
Nevermind.
Surprise overtakes my entire body as Calix stands before me. He regained control swiftly as he immediately stepped inside and embraced me tightly, feeling my hair entangled in his fingers and his scent fusing with my oxygen—I breathed deeply, leaning into him as I held him.
We expressed our inability to handle deprivation of each other's presence through our actions, speaking words that we shared unspoken.
I miss you.
The elevator sang a brief tune, and I reluctantly released him as he did I. His hands found mine and they took no time bonding together. The barriers slowly disappeared and we headed outside, treading at a fast pace as I had difficulty in matching his larger strides, unable to create a consistent pattern of steps and I became breathless—yet the cold did not seep.
Calix paused, "are you alright?" he asked, placing his hand atop of my head.
I nodded, "mhm."
"Let's hurry, I don't wanna be late," I said, stepping ahead and he caught up, walking by my side shortly.
I hadn't noticed the cold had affected me subconsciously until Calix brought our joint hands inside the pocket of his hoodie, and warmth introduced itself to me—the erstwhile ignorance of the cold no longer. I felt my body begin to tremble due to the regained awareness as I inhaled, mustering an amount of oxygen to fill my lungs and become adjusted once again to the cold, of a slight imbalance with the tiny warmth radiating from Calix's skin against mine, and mantled underneath his pocket.
Once the university building grew larger, and enormous, until it was right before us and we were unable to see the entire building with the finite range of our vision. We seized our pace, arriving a few seconds late. He caressed my head tenderly, "later." His lips pressed onto the top of my head, before stepping away.
"Today we'll be having a combined class with another because these topics will be related," said the professor. My head perked slightly, yet it didn't leave my arms as its pillow. The string of drowsiness reconnected as my eyes lured to close, feeling myself moving forward towards the haven of unconsciousness. The professor's voice faded within the background as I felt the darkness consuming the light and my entire being.
I had only sunk into my subconscious state when I felt weight planted on my head. A weight that moves. A pressure weight that transitions into light weight, back and forth. I shifted my head, dreadfully opening my eyes.
My eyeballs nearly jumped out of their sockets. Sharp canines, shallow dimples, heterochromatic eyes of moon's grays, and a voice of laughter I knew only belonged to Calix.
I straightened my back, bending my neck to the sides to cease the stiffness. I glanced around, seeing the amplified amount of population in the room. My attention snapped my head to Calix, "why are you.. here?" I yawned, covering my mouth as I shut my eyes momentarily, feeling the lingering exhaustion.
He chuckled softly, "were you sleeping the entire time?.." he shook his head with a light laughter in disbelief.
"Our topics are correlated so we have combined classes from today until the deadline of the project. We're supposed to work in pairs, by the way."
I held my hand between us as I hid all fingers aside from my forefinger. Using that as a pointer, I bent my wrist to point in between Calix and I back and forth as an invitation. He grabs my floating hand, releasing my fingers from their hiding spots and lowering his head as his lips sign the paper of skin that was my hand.
He released, "yes. You're my pair now."
My lips curved upwards, yet once my eyes scrutinized his face, they sank downwards. There were dark, swollen bags under his eyes, and his face was slightly pale as the whites in his eyes were governed with blurry, red lines.
I leaned closer, placing my hand over his arm, "are you okay? Did you not sleep well last night?" I questioned, brushing a grouped strands of hair away from his face.
He stayed silent for a moment, his eyes scanning over my face as he held my hand, he casted his eyes down.
"You too." He mutters lowly.
My head tilts in confusion, as my eyebrow twitches, "huh? What do you–"
"Are you okay? You tell me, too." He protests, a tiny pout forming on his lips.
Though a laughter nearly slipped through my lips, it was held back by the augmentation of my bewilderment.
"I don't.." before I could complete my statement, he pulled his phone out, tapped on it, and shoved the screen to my face. I saw my reflection, and an inaudible gasp left my mouth. I looked as horrid as he did.
"Shit," I look so bad.
"I didn't realize," I say. Everything happened rapidly this morning, I didn't even know. I felt exhausted, I simply didn't know I appeared as I felt.
"What happened?" he asks.
I smiled sheepishly, feeling slightly ashamed of how indecent I appeared, "I couldn't sleep.." I admit.
His assertive expression softened, "did you sleep at all?.." he asks hesitantly, as if afraid to hear my answer.
I nodded, "yeah, I think I fell asleep at.. um, four? Or five.. I don't remember," I confessed, slightly guilty.
He sighs heavily, before molding his lips into a gentle smile. His hand reaches above me, patting my head. "Take better care of yourself for me, won't you?" he pleads. I flashed an abashed smile to him as I nodded, "okay.."
"Why couldn't you sleep?" he asks, a crease forming in between his brows.
"It was cold.." without you beside me.
"The heater didn't help," I lied.
He nods in understanding, and the roles reverse. "What about you?" I question him in return.
His lips thinned, "I also couldn't sleep.."
I sigh, "did you sleep at all?.." I reciprocate.
His eyes shot up at me, "I did, around three."
I nod, before scoffing, "not you telling me to take care of myself when you couldn't yourself.." I deadpanned.
He smiles in embarrassment, "well, still.." he tries to reason, and fails miserably.
I laugh, and my mind forms another thought which I verbalize, "why can't you sleep though?"
He rubs his nape, his lips pressed tightly together as his face reddens slightly, "I..um, couldn't stop thinking about you.." he confessed, covering his eyes with his hand as his lips stretched through the embarrassment.
Me too.
My heart thumps in adoration as she frantically jumps and sprints within my chest.
"You're so cute," I cooed, grinning at him.
He smiles, his eyes stay on mine. They dropped, a second passed, and returned. Our eyes captivated by one another. His thumb rubs softly on my hand, a soothing motion.
There was no one else, but us.
Only him in my eyes, heart.
Only me in his eyes, heart.
"I want to kiss you." He says lowly, designed for my ears to hear solely.
A shy smile broke out, as his gaze grew intense. My gaze dropped, but he immediately reached out—nudging my chin up with his fingers. My eyes entered his, and my heart sank in the pool of paradise, deep in my stomach.
"We're in class," I retorted.
"I know," he smiles.
His eyes darted upwards, a direction my own followed.
11:57
"Three minutes," he warned, a sly smirk on his face as he leaned backwards, facing the teacher and removing all physical contact.
I swallowed my nerves, yet they lingered.
My eyes instinctively, continuously glanced at the clock as I felt myself tense, there was no way I could relax.
"Alright, class dismissed," the professor says, and I bolted out of my seat. I slipped past through the crowd, and individuals, and friend groups. My heart raced in thrill as my feet dictated my destination.
They stopped, and contemplated for a moment—before heading downstairs and entering the female's toilet. They brought me to a stall, and I peed.
I waited a minute, before exiting the stall and stood by the sink, activating the faucet as water poured over my skin, trading the warmth of my hand for the cold of its nature. I held a few drops of soap before rubbing my skin over each other, ensuring the thorough cleanse of any form of dirt. The water rinsed the soap off and I dried my hand with a paper towel before tossing it in the garbage can.
I left the toilet, and a strong grip latched itself onto my waist as I felt myself harshly pulled before meeting a solid object. I turned my head upwards as I gulped, seeing Calix standing before me with his arm locking my waist firmly.
His head slightly tilted as he had a nonchalant smile, his eyes casted downwards on my lips, before meeting my eyes. His gaze held an underlying starvation, an emotion of covet. I bit my lip, feeling the tension as I could feel his body through mine, pressed against each other.
The light casts on half of his face, deepening the darker shade of gray in his eye, as his other gray shines through the dark of the shadow. The caliginous shade under his eyes only served to create an intensified effect of how predatory he seemed to appear.
He was dangerously attractive.
His lips formed a grin, his canines revealed as his lips parted—as if he could see precisely how inordinate of a disaster he caused in my heart and mind.
His hand reached up to my throat, as his index finger slipped beneath my ear, and his thumb rested below my chin, jogging it—stretching my neck as he bent slightly, a small space settling in between our faces before he closed in.
My mind, and heart was lost in the air of his breath.
I held his mind, and heart inexorably with mine.
We exchanged oxygen as though it were our last breath. Yet, really—it is our first breath together.
We released each other and I hooked my arms over his shoulders, embracing him tautly.
I laughed through the giddy sensations piling within me, "I love you, Calix."
He smiles, cupping my cheek softly as his eyes glimmered with a light of my reflection through its shadow, delivering a message he verbalized, "I love you, Aslynne."
We exited the building after class dismissal. Calix had been dismissed earlier, yet he waited by the library for me. Our fingers intertwined as though they are inseparable, and he reached down to my occupied hand, grabbing the handle of my laptop bag to carry. As my hand held nothing, I shoved it inside my pocket, feeling the cold's rapid ambush.
"Thank you," I say in gratitude. He seemed puzzled for a moment, yet he followed my eyes' navigation which led him to my laptop bag he carried, and chuckled breathily. "It's my pleasure."
"Speaking of which, you don't usually bring back your laptop. What's the occasion?" he questions, and I felt the heavy flutter of wings deep in my stomach.
He noticed.
"The project, remember? The deadline's pretty short, so I thought it's better to start quickly." I answer, and his eyebrows rise as he nods in apprehension.
"Right, wanna do it together later?" Calix offers, and I feel excitement sprouting within my heart.
I nod eagerly, "yeah!"
Our walk continued briefly before I noticed his pace slowed, so I turned to him in question.
"I'm kinda craving for coffee," he answers my nonverbal incomprehension.
"Esther's coffee?" I suggested.
He nods, eyes sparkling with desire, "yeah, let's go." He drags me along as he turns the opposite direction and heads to our newly found destination. I giggled at his vivid enthusiasm.
"How long have you known the people in Esther's?" I asked him, the memories returning of moments showing his and the staffs' familiarity with each other.
"Ah.. about 2 years ago? If I'm not wrong."
He continues, "how about you?"
"A year ago. They were as nice as their coffee tasted, so it was pretty memorable," I laughed, the recording and shots of those cherishable moments playing in my mind.
"Yeah. I can relate," he says, and I noticed melancholy resting in his eyes.
He pushes the door open—the familiar ringing bell, the coffee scent, and the lack of presence all stimulating and captivating my senses at once. I grin at the staff who perked up as they saw us, feeling the comfort soothing my heart.
Their gazes immediately headed towards our intertwined hands as they squealed loudly—the place was currently absent of customers, thus, there was no reason to hold back. They embraced us as they expressed their congratulations.
"I knew it, I knew it!! See, what I told you?!" one of them spoke, grinning brightly as though our newly found happiness together was theirs to share as well.
"Well, I'd like to order first though. Aslynne?" Calix turns to me, bobbing his head towards the lady taking the order.
I nod my head, smiling, "the usual."
They worked rapidly for our orders, and once they handed them to us, they crowded us again.
"Okay, you need to spill the tea!! Every single detail, okay?!" they say keenly. Calix and I looked at each other as we laughed and sat down altogether.
We interchangeably shared our love story, and they listened intently. I couldn't bottle my laughter which continued to overflow as I realized how dramatic and cheesy some of our experiences were. Eventually, the sky began to dim, and I glanced at the time, before staring at Calix who'd followed my eyes' navigation.
"Ah, sorry guys.. but we have a project to do today, so we kind of need to—"
"Oh! Yeah, yeah! Of course, sorry for keeping you guys here so long. Thank you for telling us about it, it's a nice change of mood to our boring life."
Calix laughs, "and we're always grateful for your coffee and company."
We bid our farewells and left the cafe.
By 6 pm, we arrived at our apartment through our silent walk, simply in the comfort of each other's presence. I followed Calix as he led us to his room, and as we stood by his door, I stared at the long hallway—waiting.
When it remained silent for an extended amount of time, I reeled my head towards Calix, who had his eyes on me—seemingly, the entire time. I blinked, slightly surprised and embarrassed, "what?" I asked obliviously.
He exhales softly, "don't look away. I want you to be able to come to me whenever you need to."
I stared at him, the apprehension of his words leaving me astonishedly speechless. I released a soft sound in acknowledgement, as my eyes stayed on his movements this time.
0601
I thought about it for a moment, before my lips parted in a silent gasp. "Is that.." I asked, and the sound of the unlocked door entered my hearing sense.
He nodded, smiling as he pushed the door open with his arm extended, hand resting on the knob, "yeah, our anniversary date." He finished my sentence.
I stared at him agape, "did you change it..?"
His lips stretched wider as his shallow dimples present themselves, "funnily, no. I guess it was meant to be." He states as a natural fact.
I stepped inside his room, the door closing shut with a sharp noise as Calix stood by me.
"We were meant to be." I say as an affirmation to my heart. Calix's soft hum of agreement reached my ears as he placed his palm over my back, leading me forward as I was frozen in my position.
I followed his guidance and I sat on the soft, fluffy carpet by his bed. He vanishes for a moment before returning with his laptop, and sitting down beside me as I placed mine on my lap.
"Have you thought of a topic?" I asked him in reference to our project. He looks up at the ceiling for a moment as he enters his mind, before shaking his head. "No, I'm not so sure. But I did a little bit of research earlier, I found a few options we could use."
I leaned towards him, "show me!" I say, immersing myself in a productive mindset.
We studied together, cooperating well as pairs while trading ideas and requesting each other's opinions on parts we were unsure of.
We were compatible.
I found myself dozing off as I gazed at him in wonderment whenever I lifted my head, my eyes following suit and leaving my work in progress. He teased me every time he caught my eyes on him, yet I too, often found his gaze planting flower seeds in my face as they feed on his attention and bloom very rapidly—bringing my attention to the source. I teased him all the same.
Our time together is filled with reciprocations of each other's actions, which only further increases the depth of our bond and strength of our connection.
We had a break amidst our work for dinner, and I had only realized then, he was talented in varied artistic ways. He was an artist, a chef, a gardener, and—well, that was all I knew of his talents at the moment, but I knew he would constantly surprise me with more of his identity and character I had yet to see.
I'll be patient, I promised to my heart. As he willingly peels the petals of his flower, one by one—slowly, to me.
Until he is simply a bud of flower, and I will offer my petals to cover him as protection.
Throughout our collaboration and conversations in regards to our project, it came to light how creative his mind operated. He was constantly offering innovative ideas which I truly appreciated and adored. Yet, he seemed to struggle in arranging and organizing the accurate words to express it, and explain. I assisted him through that, and we had collective moments of continuous harmony.
The seed of my pride is watered through moments of us completing one another's needs and scarcity.
Time passed without cognizance, and I began to feel exhaustion dripping into my eyes. I glanced at the time, seeing the short-hand pointing towards the number 11.
I glanced to the side, my eyes beginning to droop. Calix was deeply concentrated on his work as my eyes closed.
I tried to lift my eyes, or open my mouth to express my enervation, yet the unconscious mind had dominated my entire being.
My eyes fluttered open, and expanded immediately as I regarded my surroundings. Calix's scent, a soft bed, warm blankets, an arm draped over my wai—what?!
I sat up immediately, and turned to the side—seeing Calix opening his eyes tiredly.
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to—" my voice evaporated as his loose arm over my body gained strength and pushed me down on the bed, returning to my lying position.
"..'s fine, don't worry. Don't leave.. stay with me… please." His words slightly slurred as his eyes closed, opened, and closed.
My voice returned meek, "okay.." I say, quite perplexed by the situation, but I didn't mind.
He's warm.
"Love you.. my Chloris," he mumbles softly, and I feel my heart responding.
Chloris?.. I wondered, yet I reciprocated.
"I love you, my.. Calyx." I smiled to myself, holding his arm which rested over my waist and resting my eyes.
These cold nights have been tiring.
Tonight, it's warm.