A name is not an ornament.
A name is memory.
Memory of those who are no more. Of those who were once by your side but now remain only in the sounds you utter to reassure yourself that they existed.
A name is not a tool. It is a hook. A hook that latches you to the past, to those you do not want to lose even after they are gone. A hook that won't let go until you tear the skin from your palm.
This applies to everyone. Or… does it? There are always those who were left out. Those whom fate abandoned on the sidelines, like a superfluous ant that fell behind its colony.
Correct, the name of one who is absent from the records of human history. No. Rather, the name of one who was erased from it. Is that happiness, or punishment? Who knows. No one can know you better than you yourself. Even if you don't want to.
His name is like a blind spot in memory. The name of one who is always near, yet as if dissolved in the air.
Avaley Le Fay.
Yes, I made a mistake. A big, irreparable one. Dug a hole so deep in the past that no amount of earth can fill it now. I could have prevented that incident. That murder of the elder who was spending his final moments atop the mountain. I could have… if I hadn't listened. If I hadn't opened the door to that person. If I hadn't...
Then again, no. Could it have been different? He would have come anyway. Even uninvited. He always comes. Always carries out his plans. Without approval, without permission, without any right.
And though I could no longer reach my creations after expending more than half of my strength on their very creation… one method still remained.
The man who sided with my enemy was named Edogawa Akira. He was the one capable of hearing my words. No, the one I allowed to hear. The one I allowed to see.
Why?
Because, by forming a contract with Yahweh and becoming his 'Core,' he became an intermediary between me and him. And though I couldn't speak to Yahweh directly, I could speak to his Core. I could, but… I hesitated.
I remained silent. Closed my eyes. Watched as Avaley dealt with the elder. Monstrously, cruelly, leaving no chance. I could have stopped it, could have saved him. Thereby saving myself. Being understood by them.
"And therein lies your problem," the witch proclaimed proudly, cutting off my thoughts.
"Your own doubts backfired. They became your obstacle. This is precisely how you robbed yourself of the only chance to be understood. Ha-ha-ha-gh!"
And no matter how much I wanted to object… she was right. Right about everything. I had nothing to say. I stood before an obvious fact, so naked that even lying to myself felt shameful.
"Better tell us, how could saving that decrepit old man have saved you? We all want to hear it! We all want to see this pathetic spectacle of worthlessness!" she said with a laugh, theatrically spreading her arms.
The performance continues. The curtain merely changes colors, repainting the scenery as if that changes anything.
But it's all far more complicated than it seems. Let's rewind. To the moment I first formed the contract with Yahweh.
It all began with a man who desired strength. Strength that would allow him to achieve anything he wished. No, not the kind of magic that grants wishes. The strength of fists, of a truth that shatters bone and law. The strength that forces others to kneel before you as if you were the law yourself.
But… what for? A question that should be addressed not to him, but to me.
When I expanded my domain, creating endless civilizations, separating them with hierarchy, placing a supreme being with the title of 'True God' over each, I lost power. Yes, I myself, through my own foolishness, failed to foresee that I could be deprived of strength.
Because of this folly, I lost connection with my creation. Sealed myself within my own space. Could only observe. Through the Sphere of Life. Without the right to intervene.
And yet, it was all planned. By that very man who advised me to expand the boundaries.
He was also the one who warned me about the 'threat.' A false threat. Bait. So that I would expend my strength. So that I would make myself weak. So that this threat would become reality.
That is why I made a pact with Yahweh. A deal whereby he was to lead all the others to me. I became the monster they needed to destroy. And he became their hero. Their last hope.
Humans and gods, who just yesterday were Yahweh's enemies, sided with him. Gave their lives for the one they had previously wished dead.
The story told in their world sounded simple. About a guy who was an enemy of humanity. About a guy who threw away lives like small change. And about the one who became their last hope.
And I… I became a threat to those I loved. Became a monster, just to save them from the real monster.
Ironic, isn't it?
The Elders… they were the ones who preserved the memory of the ages. Those who passed knowledge from generation to generation. Those who could see the threat even before it took form. That is precisely why Yahweh had to find the one singular person of that era.
But it was too late.
I, who observed all of this, could have prevented his death. Could have given Yahweh a chance to get there first. Could have changed everything.
But I didn't.
And now no one will ever know that Enua…
Was never the one you considered the enemy.