That afternoon, I found myself in a different part of the estate. Lillian's private study, where she worked on managing household affairs and, apparently, practiced her magic.
She'd invited me there when she noticed me trailing after her. Or perhaps she'd always planned to have me there. With parents, it was sometimes hard to tell.
The study was smaller than the library but more personal. Books on estate management, correspondence, ledgers. But also, I noticed with interest, several texts that had titles like "Elementary Mana Theory" and "Foundations of Circle Magic."
Lillian sat at her desk, reviewing what looked like supply requisitions. I sat on the floor nearby with some building blocks, supposedly playing but actually watching her.
She was beautiful, I'd noticed that before. But there was more to her than appearance. The way she held herself, the intelligence in her azure eyes, the casual competence with which she managed the complex affairs of a noble household. She was formidable in a completely different way than Juan.
"Are you actually playing with those blocks, Quin, or just staring at me?" she asked without looking up from her papers.
Caught.
"Mama pretty," I said, defaulting to the toddler charm that usually worked.
She did look up then, a smile playing at her lips. "Flattery, is it? You're learning quickly." She set down her quill and turned her chair to face me. "Would you like to see something interesting?"
I nodded eagerly, not having to fake enthusiasm.
Lillian held out her hand, palm up. For a moment, nothing happened. Then a small flame appeared, hovering an inch above her skin. It danced and flickered, casting warm orange light across her face.
My eyes went wide.
The flame was beautiful, mesmerizing. But what fascinated me more was what I was seeing beneath it. That same shimmer I'd noticed around the warriors, but different. More concentrated. More refined. The mana wasn't just flowing through her body. It was being shaped, directed, transformed into fire.
"This is magic, Quin," Lillian said softly. "This is what mages can do."
She closed her hand and the flame vanished. Then she opened it again, and this time a small sphere of water appeared, floating and rotating slowly. Then ice, crystalline and perfect. Then a gentle breeze that made my hair flutter despite being somehow contained to just the space around her hand.
Each element appeared and disappeared with effortless grace. And with each one, I saw the mana being shaped differently, flowing into different patterns. The fire was quick, aggressive. The water was smooth, flowing. The ice was structured, geometric. The wind was loose, free-form.
"How?" I asked, the question slipping out before I could make it sound more childish.
Lillian's eyebrows rose. "How? That's quite an advanced question for a two-year-old."
I needed to recover. "How Mama do?"
She smiled, accepting the simplified version. "Mana, sweetling. I use the mana in my core to create and shape the elements. When you're older, when you awaken, you'll be able to do amazing things too. Whether as a warrior like your father and brother, or as a mage like me."
"Can Quin do?" I reached toward the space where the elements had been, my small hand grasping at nothing.
"Someday," Lillian said, and there was something in her voice. Fondness, but also speculation. She was watching me more carefully now, like she was seeing something she hadn't expected. "You're very curious about mana, aren't you?"
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak without revealing too much.
"That's good," she continued. "Curiosity is the foundation of learning. Your father says Julian asked him many questions at your age too. The Baker children are clever."
She demonstrated a few more simple tricks, creating small illusions and manipulating objects without touching them. Each time, I watched with absolute focus, studying the way the mana moved, the way it was shaped and directed.
Magic wasn't just raw power. It was technique, precision, understanding. The mana had to be guided, formed into specific patterns to produce specific effects. Warriors pushed mana through their bodies to enhance physical abilities. Mages pulled mana out and shaped it into elemental phenomena.
Two different applications of the same fundamental energy.
And I wanted both.
The thought crystallized in my mind with absolute certainty. I didn't want to choose between warrior and mage. I didn't want to be locked into one path like everyone else. I wanted to break the rules, to be the anomaly that could do both.
Was it possible? Julian had said the Baker family were all warriors, that they were locked to the path of the sword. But that was after awakening. What if I awakened differently? What if by controlling the process, by actively filling my core instead of letting it fill passively, I could influence the outcome?
It was just a theory. Wild speculation. But it was worth pursuing.
Lillian was watching me again, her azure eyes thoughtful. "You understand more than you should," she murmured, more to herself than to me. "Or perhaps I'm seeing patterns that aren't there."
She reached down and ruffled my hair affectionately. "No matter what path you walk, Quin, you'll make us proud. I can sense it."
If only she knew what path I was actually planning to walk.