Tyrone is an average guy living alone in LA. One random day he openes the news, the president of the US has been overtaken by a dictator. The dictator created new rules for social status. Tyrone being the lone broke loser he was, he did not give a fuck and kept the lowest rank. One day he decided to research the new system and it sparked his interest. He instantly contacted his friend, Jamal who had been grinding his rank for a while.
Tyrone: yooo jamal wassup
Jamal: yo tyrone. Damn you suck at this shit bru you still at bronze beater?
Tyrone: cuh you know i dont grind ts bro. So like can you help me or sum you a golden gooner bru.
Jamal: yea sure gng follow me
Tyrone follows jamal to this tower called the edge tower. He looks around. Tyrone is told this is where edge battles are. He is told that everyone has hp and they choose to stroke it to artwork. First person to finish loses hp.
Tyrone: oh so thats what it is? Yeah im cooked gng i cant even last 30 seconds 😭🥀🥀
Jamal: dude why is there emojis in a light novel- anyways yeah thats how an edge battle works. You wanna try your first one?
Tyrone: yeah sure, whos my opponent
Daquavious conveniantly enters
Daquavious: It is I, daquavious. I will be your opponent, mr... uh whats your name
Tyrone: tyrone
Daquavious: mr. Tyrone. Prepare to be defe-
Tyrone: can you like shut the fuck up ur the same rank as me
Daquavious: you wont be sqying that after i be-
Tyrone: SHUT THE FUCK UP
And they start an edge battle. It was fierce, it was close, but in the end, they both were at 1hp.
Tyrone: fuck dude this shit is peak i might goon to it later ngl
Daquavious: well, its the last one, w-wait is that? MY GLORIOUS KING LEBRON?
Daquavious instantly loses
Tyrone: you were saying about me losing?
Daquavious: it doesnt count! It was lebron, its justified
Tyrone: Ok bro...
Jamal: you guys done? Yall pmo fr
So tyrone finally won his first edge battle, it was intense but he was saved by lebron james, little did he know his next battle wouldnt be as easy. Anyways tyrone goes outside with jamal and realises that hes a broke bum, is 2 weeks late on rent and is currently un*mployed and about to go homeless. He cant get a j*b due to his bronze beater rank, so he decides to grind
Him and jamal gather the best of the best content and they start practicing their edging
Tyrone: damn bro how are you not close at all
Jamal: im a golden gooner bro. Im just built like thag
Tyrone: ok bro stop flexing before i put this di-
???: can you two shut the fuck up?
Tyrone: who are you??
???: i am-