A dream, I had a dream.
A dream that would not fade, a dream that kept repeating, a dream with no end, a dream that would not end――.
Over and over again, many many times over, repeating mistakes over and over, correcting them more and more.
One thousand times, spinning. Ten thousand times, connecting. One hundred million times, overcoming them.
And before knowing it, losing track of counting.
Agony, terror, turbidity, ruin, hatred, madness.
Exhausted, shaken, twisted, corrupted, contorted, decayed, anguished; a heart smashed to pieces.
And yet, there was still a place I wanted to reach.
And yet, there was still a wish I wanted to protect.
Even if no one knew about the endless tragedies that repeated over and over, I would not forget.
Even if no one notices, only I am unable to forget.
――Even if the people I want to save wept, I still want to save them.
So, even now, I do not regret having taken that hand.
If there is something I regret, it would be that I was hesitant and indecisive in taking her hand, and the frustration towards my own weak, fragile heart that I could not steel.
△▼△▼△▼△
――Waking up from an empty dream, the first thing he always felt was a throbbing headache.
???: [――――]
Drowsily waiting for the awakening of consciousness, shrouded in ambiguous mist. It would not take long. The groggy awakening took only a few seconds, and immediately his consciousness detached from that sleep, awakening.
???: [Ah, Aaah.]
As his physical body began to wake, he confirmed his body's condition with a drawn-out voice.
At a glance, it appeared like he was still half-asleep, but this was an important part of his morning routine. By lying on his back, he let out his voice and gathered several pieces of information.
The tone of his voice, the establishment of his consciousness, the safety of his limbs, the organization of his memories, the progression of his day, and the existence of his life――.
Even so, it was easy to lose track of the correct flow of time. He could not neglect to verify it.
All of this, was evidence that Natsuki Subaru had reached the morning without making any grave mistakes.
Subaru: [Fuwa…]
Peeling off the blanket while yawning, he slowly lifted his body from the bed.
He roughly scratched his head and looked around the room he had become accustomed to seeing―― it was luxuriously furnished, and standing out within the room's interior was a canopy bed.
But, where Subaru had woken up was not the luxurious bed, but rather a sofa placed further within the room. Curled up in a ball, hugging a blanket, was how he had spent the nights recently―― no, rather, this had been the nighttime habit of Natsuki Subaru for what he felt was several years now.
Be that as it may, there was not any significant reason for him to not sleep in his bed.
It was simply the result of striving to find a comfortable sleeping environment, even if just a little bit. After various trials and errors, he had found that he felt more of a semblance of peaceful sleep by sleeping on the sofa rather than in the bed.
Perhaps it was the feeling of being on the edge that suited his nature, as if one careless toss and turn would send him to the floor.
Subaru: [――――]
Putting those feelings aside, Subaru stood up from the sofa and headed to the washroom so he could get ready. He washed his face in the washroom that was adjacent to the bedroom, and observed his wet face in the mirror.
His face held a look of fatigue, and his eyes gave off a sense of despondency. His face looked frayed with dejection, and his overall demeanor appeared listless in every aspect, both mentally and physically.
In an attempt to tighten his sagging expression, he slapped his own cheeks as hard as he could with both hands.
A dry sound and numbing pain accompanied the tears that welled up; in order to wash them away, he poured cold water onto his face. Once again, he looked at his wet face in the mirror, and whilst carefully kneading his face, eyes, and cheeks, he spoke.
Subaru: [Smile… you gotta smile. If you can't, then… die.]
Chanting this incantation, Subaru bent his mouth into a terrible, crooked smile.
He flashed his white teeth, his smile narrowing his eyes so the whites were no longer fully visible; this was the villainous side of himself that he had been acquainted with for around eighteen years. He could "camouflage" his eyes, his facial expression, and his countenance with no issues.
Subaru: [Oookay, okay. Keep it like this.]
Commanding his reflection in the mirror to maintain the smile, Subaru quickly dried his face with a towel and changed his clothes.
While living at the Mansion, Subaru's appearance was not garbed in a servant's uniform or a tracksuit, but rather, he predominantly wore the formal attire of a fairly dignified noble. He loosened the collar of his formal jacket, rolled up his sleeves to his elbows, giving a relaxed appearance, but surprisingly, there were no complaints about his manner of dress.
Given his position, and likely due to his achievements as well, he was expected to dress accordingly in public.
Individuals with power and high status were allowed some degree of personal freedom. ――Just like how Roswaal, despite his clownish appearance, silenced those around him with his status of Margrave.
Compared to that, Subaru's disheveled formal attire could be considered charming. Despite feeling a bit stuffy, he was still dressing in a manner befitting his position. After all, this position was something Subaru himself desired.
It would be absurd to refuse himself that which he desired.
Subaru: [Can't stay here any longer. It's about time.]
Straight away after he had finished changing, Subaru looked up to the Magic Hour Crystal that had been furnished above the room's door and muttered.
It had a dark green hue, signifying that it was morning: it showed that his time for getting out of bed was soon. Apparently, it seemed like this morning he had spent just a little bit too much time practicing his smile in front of the mirror.
In a few more minutes, a meticulously punctual girl would visit his room right on schedule.
Before that, he needed to finish everything he had not done yet.
Subaru: [――――]
Letting out a long exhale, Subaru opened his shirt's collar with a feeling of gloom.
There, resting against his skin, even during sleep, was the dull shimmer of a black Magic Crystal. Clenching it in his palm, Subaru directed his consciousness towards the mysteriously gleaming crystal.
The sensation of the cold, hard stone, gradually warming within Subaru's palm, even induced an illusion that it started pulsating like a living thing.
At some point, Subaru's own heartbeat even began to synchronize with that of the Magic Crystal in his grasp.
The Magic Crystal continued to beat faster and higher than one's pulse after an all-out sprint. Its pulsation and Subaru's heartbeat perfectly overlapped, equalling each other. ――Right after that.
Subaru: [――――]
By the time he had realized it, Subaru's consciousness was enveloped in white light, and he felt detached from his physical body.
The separation of his consciousness from his physical body was almost a sign of awakening from sleep. He had tasted the sensation of being pulled up from the depths of slumber twice within such a short span, and his vision began to clear.
A vast, green plain spread out as far as the eyes could see.
The sunlight, almost blinding, poured down, and a sea of grass swayed magnificently in the sweeping wind. A world where the blue of the sky and the green of the earth went on forevermore, up until they hazily intersected in the distant horizon.
It was a dreamlike world, lacking a sense of reality, possessing an unreal beauty which suited it.
Magnificently clear, eternally silent. ――Right at the center of it all, there was a small hill that harmonized with the landscape.
Atop the gently sloping hill, a white table and parasol could be seen from afar, and Subaru slowly directed his feet toward them as if he was being led.
Under the parasol, upon the round table, were cups emitting steam; within the ceramic cups, amber-coloured liquid was warmly contained.
Two cups had been set upon the table, and white chairs had been placed on both ends of the table.
Subaru did not even confirm that the chair was prepared for him before sitting down on it. Though the tea had just recently finished brewing, he held the cup to his mouth, wetting his throat with its contents.
He had already lost count of how many cups he had already consumed, as the enigmatic tea continued to fill Subaru's insides. This strange tea, tasteless and odorless, however, was an absolute requirement for attending this tea party.
Hand-prepared by the host of the tea party, it was a cup offered as a form of greeting, a mandatory gesture.
And, as Subaru accepted this strange hospitality,
Subaru: [Ah, I drank it, I drank it, thanks for the drink. Alright, let's quickly move onto the main subject.]
???: [――Of course, I suppose I did say that the first sip worked as a greeting. However, I do not believe that means that you should never give me a simple hello, mhm?]
After emptying his cup, Subaru tossed it aside as he spoke. Upon the cup breaking on top of the hill and his rude response, the person sitting across the table from him voiced their dissatisfaction.
In response to this complaint, Subaru showed no signs of remorse, and,
Subaru: [There's no real reason to greet you. After all, since you're peering inside and outside of my head day and night, does saying hello or goodbye to you have any meaning?]
Girl: [This and that are different matters, you know? First of all, saying that I watch you day and night: I would like for you not to speak of it in such a scandalous manner. Even supposing it is true, I am still a young maiden, as delicate as a flower. Would my reputation not become all the more worse if it became known that I am always staring into a boy's mind?]
Subaru: [A young maiden, as delicate as a flower; did the meaning of those words change without my knowledge?]
Girl: [How scathing of you. Well, maybe it is unreasonable at my age to insist on calling myself a maiden.]
Saying so, the girl relaxed her mouth into a smile, quite contrasting the contents of her complaints.
She did not seem to express a particularly strong sense of wariness or fear to begin with; in fact, the girl was quite tolerant of Subaru's casual, impolite language. Even this exchange seemed to be a source of amusement for her.
Subaru could not help but feel an intensifying sense of guilt within his heart upon seeing that smile. He knew the true nature of this guilt. ――However, it was ugly enough to make him want to avert his gaze from it.
Thus, Subaru stared back at the girl who evoked such emotions, and averted his gaze from his own guilt.
Subaru: [As expected, you're such an unpleasant woman.]
Girl: [How glad it makes me to hear that. Rather than becoming someone desirable to you in all manner of ways, rather than becoming someone apathetic for whom you cannot see the value in assisting with your helping hand, for your kind, greedy self, becoming someone hateful who cruelly wounds your heart and drives in a wedge that cannot be removed, would please me more than anything.]
Even in the face of sarcasm without preamble, her response remained composed.
She was aware that her reply might have provoked a displeased expression from Subaru, or even have made him feel bitter, but she continued in that manner, leading him on.
Girl: [Now then, any more of this, and my heart will become pained from buying into your antipathy and being so loathed. Let us try to achieve the purpose for this morning's rendezvous, shall we?]
Subaru: [You weren't hoping to be hated?]
Girl: [It was the bluff of a cute girl, you know? This is what I want you to see and accept.]
Subaru: [Cute…?]
Subaru tilted his head in sincere doubt deep in his heart; his companion merely gave an ironic smile.
And then――,
Girl: [Truly, you are a man fearless to a fault. As the Witch of Greed, I like that about you. ――Natsuki Subaru.]
This contractor was worthy of being called the Witch of Greed.
Echidna narrowed her eyes with a sweet smile, a smile of genuine joy.
△▼△▼△▼△
Subaru: [Today's the fourteenth of Kisdam… right?]
Echidna: [Yes, you are correct. Fortunately, nothing abnormal happened to you last night. You slept on that cramped sofa and endured the night's discomfort, waking up without any issues… But still, you are quite cautious, are you not? No need to worry so much, you know?]
Subaru: [Such stupid words. Living without caution, and waking up dead in the morning, is also a possibility. Us humans, we never know when or where we're gonna die.]
Clicking his tongue at the Witch's optimism, Subaru recalled the desperate feeling of loss his Deaths left him.
Without warning, the tomorrow he trusted would come would suddenly be taken from him by a Return by Death to the past―― time forgotten by the people with whom he spent his time; how much fear and disappointment had he tasted upon realizing he would need to rebuild those relationships?
Subaru: [The world could end at any moment, and it wouldn't surprise me anymore. That's…]
Echidna: [――I agree. I was thoughtless just now. My apologies for that.]
Subaru: […What, aren't you being terribly meek right now?]
Echidna: [I apologise if you thought of it as a bad thing. I believe it is about time you acknowledged that I am not that bad of a woman.]
Resting her cheek against her palm, with her elbow on the table, Echidna sent a seductive sidelong glance toward Subaru.
Her enchanting white hair, long eyelashes, and a beautiful face with a straight nose were like a supreme work of art that was rarely seen, and many painters would break their brushes at such unreproducible beauty.
Sometimes jokingly, she boasted that she had received marriage proposals from royalty in the past; perhaps, this might not have been a lie.
However――,
Subaru: [Hmmmm…]
Echidna: [――? What is it? Staring at my face in such a way… is there something on it?]
Subaru: [Aaah, just hair, and ears, and a mouth, and a nose, and eyes…]
Echidna: […Hm, I wonder why? Even though you say something completely obvious, I feel insulted.]
When she showed such a vexed emotion, the solemn atmosphere of the Witch instantly dissipated.
What remained was the face of a remarkably youthful girl, contrasting with her actual age, despite her exterior matching the age one would expect. She would appear far more attractive to boys his age than a serene beauty, akin to a painting.
Of course, Subaru's aesthetic sense had already determined the pinnacle of beauty, so discovering Echidna's new charms would be just like adding another entry to an encyclopedia.
Echidna: [Did I receive a worse impression than I had thought just now!?]
Subaru: [I didn't even say anything. That's a false accusation.]
Echidna: [The way you put it, you might have been thinking something quite harsh, even if you did not mutter it aloud. Hiding things from me will not work. We are not that distant.]
Subaru: [I didn't say anything because I didn't want to intentionally sour our relationship…]
Echidna: [See! I knew you were thinking something terrible after all!]
Reacting as if she had taken an oni's head, she made a fuss about Subaru's inner thoughts. [2]
Subaru knew from experience that either telling the truth or hiding it would only cause a fuss, so he covered his ears and lowered his head, waiting for the storm to pass.
Echidna: [Generally, your attitude as of late is becoming quite unbearable. You have been treating me, the Witch of Greed, with much disdain. I do not expect admiration or awe from you, but there must be a more appropriate way for you to treat me.]
Subaru: [An appropriate way of treating you, like what?]
Echidna: [More like treating a noble with respect, or treating a beautiful woman with hospitality.]
Gently placing her hand on her chest, Echidna threw out a troublesome request at him.
It had become a regular occurance, this time of Echidna seeking attention.
This was not to say that Subaru's mental state was fluctuating due to experiencing successive Returns by Death, but rather that Echidna was extremely troublesome in this situation.
Also, he did not want to deal with her after having just woken up.
Echidna: [Your casualness is quite refreshing and pleasant for me. But, sometimes, I would not mind having a moment that reminds you of who I am, you know?]
Subaru: [A moment that reminds me of who you are… does that mean making someone puke upon meeting them for the first time?]
Echidna: [When you cut it down to just that, I feel that my nature is greatly misunderstood!]
Saying this and that, Subaru frowned at Echidna's attention-seeking behavior.
In the past, he had tried to deal with her in a straightforward manner, but the more he did so, the more she took advantage of him, leading him to avoid taking her seriously ever since.
Therefore, Subaru quickly shifted the conversation off topic with an "Anyway".
Subaru: [If you're just gonna idly chatter, I'm out.]
Echidna: [Hmm… that is not exactly a heartwarming conversation. In the first place, you do not seem to be in great shape this morning. So, it would not hurt to rest here a bit longer.]
Subaru: […Certainly, there are times when staying here brings relief.]
As he rose from his chair while cracking his neck, Echidna's eyes lit up as she responded to Subaru with a "Right?" But there was more to Subaru's words.
Indeed, during this tea party, Subaru's consciousness was isolated from the outside world, allowing him to stay here longer in spirit alone. There had been times when this mental refuge had brought him solace.
Subaru: [In situations like that, I won't hesitate to indulge you. But, not now.]
Echidna: [Are you worried of becoming weak if you rely on others? That is a stoic way of thinking, but does it really make sense? After all, I am your only accomplice… I'm someone with whom you can share your pain and sorrow.]
Subaru: [――. I'm grateful to you.]
In fact, without Echidna's presence, the current Subaru would not exist.
By extension, that also meant that the peace that Subaru's loved ones enjoyed today also would not be possible.
Echidna's affirmation, support, and advice had all helped Subaru to overcome the numerous obstacles that had stood in his way. He had to admit that her presence had been empowering.
However――,
Subaru: [However, I don't intend to entrust my pain and sorrow to anyone. This is mine and mine alone, and I'm going to get over it on my own, which is why you and I made this Contract. Isn't that right?]
Echidna: […That is the one aspect you will not bend on. How lonely that makes me.]
With her eyes downcast, framed by long lashes, Echidna muttered with a sense of loneliness. As it was, she brought the cup to her mouth, a sign that she had let go of her intention to continue this conversation.
After witnessing this, Subaru turned his back on her and looked down the hill. Below the gentle slope, in the middle of the green meadow, an unnatural structure―― a door, appeared.
This corridor was the only link between this Castle of Dreams and reality.
Subaru: [Earlier, you didn't deny the idea of peeping on me constantly, did you?]
Echidna: […I thought I had prefaced that with "hypothetically"?]
Subaru: [With my language skills, that sounds like how a conniving mastermind would speak.]
Echidna: [――――]
At this hounding from Subaru, who had turned away earlier, Echidna let out a small sigh. Then she put her mouth on the cup once more. It was a sign that she had let go of her intention to continue this conversation――,
Subaru: [From now on, I'm removing the Magic Crystal when I go to the toilet or wash myself.]
Echidna: [Aahh]
Replying with "What's with that aahh?", Subaru clicked his tongue and finally left the tea party.
Standing in front of the door at the bottom of the hill, Subaru put his hand on the doorknob and casually turned around.
There, on top of the hill, Echidna's hair fluttered in the wind as she absentmindedly watched Subaru's back. Noticing his gaze, Echidna gave a small wave of her hand.
For a moment, Subaru hesitated whether to wave back or not, and then, with only a sigh, he pushed open the door.
――And, straight after, his consciousness that had been captured by the dream world was released, returning back to reality.
Subaru: [――――]
When his consciousness came back to reality, Subaru was still standing in his own room, holding the Magic Crystal.
He let out a long breath and raised his gaze; the color of the Magic Hour Crystal had not yet changed. The time he had spent in the world of dreams was only a few seconds in real time. It could be said to be a Room of Spirit and Time.
Subaru: [Still, I'll never get used to it…]
It had become part of his morning routine to be invited to that world of dreams, and to participate in Echidna's tea party.
By doing so, it helped Subaru grasp the current situation, and it had become a habit to ensure that there was no discrepancy between his perception and what was true; however, he still struggled with the time lag when he returned from the tea party to reality.
Echidna suggested he could stay longer without any worries, but that seemed to come with its own set of problems.
Spending long periods in that spiritual world, only to suddenly realize that his soul had aged by hundreds of years, would be a truly historical mysterious turn of events.
???: [――The aging of your soul, and your links with the Witch, shall one day become poison that will definitely consume you. Please do not forget that. Reflection.]
Subaru: [――――]
Suddenly, Subaru's thoughts suddenly echoed with a man's last words and testament.
The poor enemy, who was completely seen through by the machinations of a Subaru who accumulated Return by Deaths, had all of his countermeasures prevented, had his escape route completely blocked, had lost his allies, and was left alone and helpless.
In the end, Natsuki Subaru's battle had become ultimately one-sided.
His foe's defeat was no exception. His rebellious spirit was completely conquered, and the battle was settled without causing any damage to the surroundings and without any bloodshed other than that of the enemy.
Those words that he heard were the final words of a man spoken in such a situation, with Death looming before him.
Someday, Subaru would regret his own way of being. If such a time were to come, would that man be waiting for Subaru in the depths of hell?
Subaru: [But, it's unfortunate. After I die, where my soul goes is predestined.]
Even if all of his bitter foes were waiting for Subaru in hell, Subaru's soul would never arrive there.
They would be waiting there, all alone, forever, continuing to be consumed by Subaru, even after death.
But, he would like them to tolerate that much. Subaru, also, did not expect that the afterlife would be easy.
Subaru: [That's what they call a Contract with a Witch.]
???: […Um, did I ever say something about taking your soul?]
As Subaru muttered deeply to himself, a different sort of hallucination echoed in his mind, distinct from the voice of the deceased man.
It sounded very similar to the voice of the Witch with whom he had just parted ways.
Echidna: [No, this is not a hallucination. It really is me.]
Subaru: [I know that. Shut up.]
Subaru silently refuted the voice of the Witch that seemed to be whispering in his ear.
The source of the voice was the Magic Crystal that Subaru had placed around his neck again. He flicked it with his finger in annoyance and snorted at the voice, which he could hear without having to go back to the dream world.
The reason as to why so few words were exchanged as their parting was quite apparent.
Echidna: [It is not necessary for you to linger, as we can always talk anytime.]
Subaru: [Don't just randomly start talking to me when you don't have business with me, just because you can.]
Echidna: [It is not uncommon for a Spiritual Arts User and their contracted Spirit to communicate telepathically. And, how should I put it, I do not believe anyone would pay much attention, even if your monologues increased at this point.]
Having had a sore spot poked, Subaru furrowed his brows with displeasure.
As soon as Echidna felt Subaru's discomfort, she exclaimed "Oops", and continued,
Echidna: [I will comply with your request here. Please, do not hesitate to call upon me if you need me, contractor-dono.]
Leaving behind those theatrical words, communication with the telepathic Echidna ceased.
Although the physical distance between them had not changed, it was difficult for Subaru to relax as he was aware of her presence peering through the Magic Crystal.
And so, as the morning routine of being toyed with by the Witch came to an end――,
???: [――Subaru-sama, are you awake?]
There was a knock on the door from outside, which informed him of his usual wake-up time.
Subaru cleared his throat slightly as he heard the gentle voice which had called to him. Then, clapping his hands to his face, and using the mirror to once again reshape his face into a smile, he gave a very unspirited reply of "Come innn".
???: [Good morning, Subaru-sama. Today is once again a splendid morning, you know.]
Hearing that reply and entering the room was a smiling girl in a maid's uniform―― Subaru's maid, Petra Leyte.
When he had first met her, she was still a young bud who had yet to flower; but now, she was entering a season of growth, and was in the process of blooming beautifully. Her height, arms, and legs had grown compared to before, and she was becoming increasingly well-suited to her pretty maid dress, too.
Her behavior and mannerisms, as well, were not lost against her adorable outfit. From the start, she was a girl who was well-taught and quick to learn. And now, as a maid, Petra had reached top-notch levels.
A fourteen-year-old flower―― seeing the smile of the all grown-up Petra, Subaru replied with a smile.
Subaru: [Good mornin', Petra. I agree with you… it's indeed a splendid morning. I'm pretty happy that I was able to see Petra's cute face again this morning.]
Petra: [Subaru-sama's still saying such things… Ah, but there are clouds hanging over the sky beyond the forest, and it seems that the weather may get worse this afternoon. I have plans to go shopping this afternoon, so I hope it'll stay sunnyyy.]
Inclining her head in response to Subaru's greeting, Petra turned her eyes towards the window and muttered that out. In those words, there was a faint trace of her childish immaturity, and Subaru gave a small chuckle.
Petra: [Ah! No, Subaru-sama, why are you laughing?]
Subaru: [No, no, it's that just now, you broke out of your beautiful maid shell for a moment. How very Petra-like.]
Petra: [Jeez, please stop treating me like a kid that way. I'm totally grown up. I've been a maid already for two years… because of that, I've become an adult!]
Shaking her auburn hair, Petra's cheeks blushed and her lips pouted in embarrassment. Before the figure of his cute little sister, Subaru smiled and stroked the girl's head.
Petra's eyes narrowed happily at that touch, and she let out a reluctant sigh.
Petra: [So, what will you be doing this morning? It's still too early for breakfast, but…]
Subaru: [Ahh, for the time being, I'll just finish my usual routine, and then if it goes well, we can have breakfast with everyone. If it doesn't go well… then, the usual.]
Petra: […Right.]
Casting her eyes down slightly at Subaru's reply, Petra made quite a serious face. Not able to bear seeing such a sweet girl make such a face, Subaru scratched his head,
Subaru: [Anyhow, thank you for today as well. Especially for coming to wake me up.]
Petra: [――――]
Subaru: [Petra?]
Petra: [Subaru-sama, you really are careless.]
Saying that to Subaru, who awkwardly tried to change the topic, Petra gave an exasperated sigh. And then, the girl shook her head, putting on a smile like a bloomed flower,
Petra: [No, even this is my job. Besides, it's very easy to handle because Subaru-sama never really sleeps in… It would be fine, even if you were a little less disciplined, but…]
Subaru: [Huh?]
Petra: [It's nothing. Well then, I'll see you later. Pardon me.]
Every morning, after acting as Subaru's alarm clock, Petra would hold her skirt politely in a curtsy. And then, after seeing off Subaru, she would leave the room.
The door would close, and Subaru would nod his head in satisfaction at Petra's growth.
Subaru: [Petra has become so splendid. As a big brother, I'm proud.]
Echidna: [But from her perspective, she does not seem to think of you as an elder brother.]
Subaru: […I tell you to keep silent except for when I need you, and then this happens. The great Witch sure is quick to break her promises.]
As she responded to his soliloquy, Subaru was astonished by the Witch's lack of patience and inability to tolerate silence. But, letting out a sigh of resignation, looking towards the door through which Petra had disappeared,
Subaru: [I'm that girl's big brother, you know? So, that makes Petra my cute little sister. That's why I will make that girl happy. ――That much I will absolutely do.]
Echidna: [You shall absolutely make her happy, you say…? Contrary to what you might think, that may be a dreadful statement.]
Hearing Subaru's firm tone, Echidna said this without poking any fun at him.
Ignoring the words of the Witch, Subaru stretched a little before leaving the room.
The corridors of the mansion were quite chilly with the air of the early morning; shivering, Subaru shrugged off the cold and set out.
―― His daily "routine" was about to start.
△▼△▼△▼△
Since a few months ago, mornings in the Roswaal mansion would begin with an intense "Death Match".
Though, calling it a "Death Match" might have been quite surprising for those involved.
Still, for Subaru, who would witness it from the sidelines, the exchanges were violent enough to be called a "Death Match".
In fact, one of the two who clashed together must have challenged with the intent to kill.
But unfortunately, the opposing party evaded that ferocious fighting spirit with ease. The disparity of power between the two of them was completely evident in the eyes of anyone who cared to look.
Of course, there was no doubt that they would keep up this dangerous routine every morning due to this reason.
???: [RHHHHHAAAAARRRGH!!]
There was a fierce howl of rage, accompanied by an explosive kick that blew away the lawn on the courtyard.
Digging their foot in deeply, with that tempestuous propulsion the golden silhouette charged forward, his beastly claws driving straight toward the figure of their opponent.
It was a blow that could rend thick steel plates, one which could turn a human body into minced meat―― the claws of the beast delivered a myriad of violent attacks, assailing its prey in an attempt to forbid it from escaping.
However――,
???: [I apologize, but the gap is too great.]
???: [GHHA――!?]
The other silhouette easily avoided the downpour of fatal attacks coming from the claws of the beast. And immediately after, their long legs sprung up, and the body of the beast was pierced from below.
The beast raised a cry in anguish at receiving that blow, and the body of the one who had set the trap arced upwards――,
???: [GHHAGHK―― !?]
――Or rather, that was what should have happened, but that was not what had transpired.
The body that had been launched skywards was intercepted by the opponent's heel directly from above, sending them crashing down into the ground. The impact produced a circular crater upon the lawn's surface, leaving the beast perfectly silent, sprawled out unmoving upon the ground.
They desperately tried to move their limbs, but the beast's fighting spirit was extinguished.
???: [Do you wish to continue?]
???: [――Aurgh]
The victor asked them whether they wanted to proceed as the loser let out a groan.
There was neither sarcasm nor cynicism when asking that; they were words spoken only towards the other's fighting spirit. That was why those words deeply wounded the loser's pride.
Thus――,
???: [You probably don't even realize it, but words like that are demeaning, you know. Stop with the damn Samurai's pity.]
Entering the scene in which the outcome had already been decided, Subaru interjected, scratching his head.
Hearing those words, the young man who had been overlooking his sprawled-out opponent turned to look back at him. The young man with hair red as a flame raised his hand towards Subaru, saying "Hello".
???: [Good morning, Subaru. You're up early this morning, no?]
Subaru: [Not as early as the two of you. Even so, don't you get bored or fed up with having to do this everyday… you don't have to always act so upright, Reinhard.]
Reinhard: [There's nothing wrong with his ambition to become stronger. Besides, it's also true that he's strengthening his abilities day by day. Before long, won't there come a time where he will have a good match with me?]
Subaru: [Is that so? …I'm having a bit of a hard time picturing that.]
So smiled the red-haired youth―― Reinhard van Astrea.
Subaru tilted his head at the evaluation of this generation's Sword Saint, the strongest man on earth. He meant not to belittle his morning training partner, but Reinhard's assessment seemed overly modest.
Subaru had tried countless attempts, but he could not come up with a strategy to defeat Reinhard. No matter how many times he had Returned by Death, he could not envision a victory.
Perhaps the same applied for the person lying sprawled out on the ground.
???: [――Tch]
Having suffered significant damage, frowning was none other than Garfiel.
Wheezing in anguish, he was still unable to stand up but the fighting spirit dwelling in his emerald eyes had not wavered at all. However, the world was not so kind that a competitive spirit could have any effect on one's prowess.
Even if Garfiel's frustration had reached its limit, he would not be able to break Reinhard's cool demeanour.
That, too, was the observation of Natsuki Subaru, who had witnessed a wide variety of situations.
Subaru: [Your determination to take on the challenge is admirable. Hey, can you get up, Garfiel?]
Garfiel: […Don't be touchin' me so casually. I don't need yer fuckin' hand ta stand up, ya know.]
Shaking off Subaru's outstretched hand, Garfiel bared his fangs in disgust at him.
It was obvious that he was putting on a tough act, so Subaru quietly retracted his hand. Even if it was bravado, he would rather let his fangs break before he let that fact be exposed.
Ever since kneeling before the Great Rabbit, Garfiel refused to yield.
He continued to challenge Reinhard, despite knowing there was no chance of winning, all in an attempt to forget that defeat.
Echidna: [Such an adorable act of resistance.]
Subaru: [Quit it. I won't let you make fun of Garfiel.]
Echidna: [Huh!? I was not making fun of him at all…]
Subaru could only sigh at the surprised reaction of the wide-eyed wicked spirit within his head.
Then, he looked at the now-standing Garfiel, who had somehow managed to get up,
Subaru: [If you can stand up on your own, go take a bath before breakfast. Get rid of that sweat and mud, or Ram will come to dislike you.]
Garfiel: […Shut yer trap. I already know that without ya needin' ta tell me.]
Subaru: [And…]
Garfiel, his knees trembling, wrinkled his nose as Subaru added a comment.
His enmity towards the person who had crushed his dignity was laid bare. Facing that gaze, Subaru closed one eye,
Subaru: [You should visit Ryuzu-san's place once in a while. Both Ryuzu-san and Shima-san were worried about you.]
Garfiel: [――Tsk]
Subaru: [You can be stubborn all you want. But, if you let people worry about you because of it…]
Garfiel: [Shut the fuck up!]
And, at those sermon-like words, Subaru's collar was roughly seized by Garfiel.
Garfiel then attempted to hoist Subaru up.
However――,
Reinhard: [Garfiel, do not go any further. Subaru is going to get hurt.]
In an instant, Reinhard intervened, restraining Garfiel's arm.
Reinhard, who had somehow managed to get his hand off of Subaru's chest, looked at Garfiel sternly and lowered his eyebrows.
Reinhard: [If that were to happen, Ram-san would be terribly angry with you.]
Garfiel: [If y'all're thinkin' my amazin' self'd back down just 'cause I get told to, you're dead wrong.]
Subaru: [Cough, we can't help that it's the most effective method. Ah, ugh.]
Having both Subaru and Reinhard consecutively refer to Ram, Garfiel clenched his teeth in annoyance. Chuckling at the situation, Subaru briefly placed a hand to his throat, which was in pain for a moment, and lightly coughed to adjust his tone.
Subaru: [Phew… even though the bit about Ram getting angry is a joke, if people get hurt, then morning practice might have to be banned. If that happens, it won't be good for you, either.]
Garfiel: [Grr…]
Reinhard: [Garfiel, I will always be here with you. I know you swore a vow to not see your family until you are satisfied with yourself, but…]
Staring at Garfiel, who was gnashing his teeth, Reinhard quietly shook his head.
Within those blue eyes that captured the azure sky, there was a hint of loneliness, as he said,
Reinhard: [But, you should meet with your cherished ones, and exchange words with them while you can still see them. If you regret it after they are gone, there's no getting that back.]
Garfiel: [――――]
The pupils of Garfiel's emerald eyes narrowed as he listened to Reinhard's heartfelt words.
And then――,
Garfiel: [Next time, I'm gonna fuckin' beat ya.]
With that, he shook off Reinhard's grip on his arm and turned away.
As he walked away in a disgruntled manner, Reinhard called out "I will be looking forward to it", a sincere cheer devoid of sarcasm.
Subaru: [But, the lack of sarcasm actually makes it sound kind of sarcastic.]
Reinhard: [I wonder about that. Do you think Garfiel was offended again?]
Subaru: [Nah, as far as he's concerned, he's got a lot more hate for me than for you, so I don't think you need to worry about that at all.]
As they watched Garfiel depart from the courtyard, Subaru shrugged his shoulders. In response, Reinhard adjusted his collar with one hand and chuckled.
The slight disarrangement of his collar was the only trace of their morning training that Garfiel had managed to leave behind.
Subaru: […After destroying the courtyard like this, I can understand why he's frustrated.]
Reinhard: [Still, I think it's going to take a while. I can't help but feel bad about it too. After all――]
At that point, Reinhard paused, his gaze turning to the marks Garfiel had left on the lawn.
Reinhard: [He's avoiding visiting his grandmother, who lives apart from him, until he can defeat me.]
Subaru: [I understand the logic, but he messed up his goal setting… his own lack of strength seems to have hit him pretty hard. It's understandable that he is stubborn. Just…]
Reinhard: [Just?]
Subaru: [I think you are a part of the reason for that stubbornness.]
When Subaru firmly pointed a finger at him, Reinhard nodded his head in agreement.
There was something to recall here. It was also an event that created an insurmountable rift between Reinhard and Garfiel.
To put it simply, it was when Reinhard found out about Garfiel's vow.
Subaru: [That was why you went easy on him, to help him achieve his goal.]
Reinhard: [It was a mistake, and I deeply regret it too. I should have handled it better.]
Subaru: [As long as you're thinking like that, no matter how hard you try, it won't work.]
While Reinhard regretted the method he had used, it also became a significant point of reflection for Subaru.
The rift that was created between Reinhard and Garfiel was one of Subaru's failures, a mistake that he could not redo―― the incident that happened just before Subaru's Return by Death checkpoint, an irreparable mistake.
Echidna: [It was a trivial matter, so it did not hinder us later on.]
Subaru: [Because of that, Ryuzu-san and the others were left feeling lonely.]
Knowing that Reinhard had been holding back, Garfiel's stubbornness only intensified.
As a result, the intensity of the morning practice, and the ferocity of the young tiger, grew stronger with each passing day.
Subaru: [In this case, it's not about who's at fault.]
Reinhard: [Just now, I thought you clearly said it was my fault.]
Subaru: [It's a figure of speech! If we start pointing fingers, that stubborn Garfiel would be the one most at fault for sure.]
However, not being able to solve Garfiel's stubbornness was also a sign of Subaru and the others' powerlessness.
It was a painful realization. Even if he accumulated Deaths and reached for the best outcome he could, he still would not be able to prevent every single slight scratch, and wounds might still fester.
Subaru: [So, please continue to accompany him for a while.]
Reinhard: [I understand. Like I said earlier, his actual abilities are improving. It's good that he learns quickly. ――The courtyard's destruction was worth it.]
With a composed expression, Reinhard's concern was directed at the state of the ruined courtyard.
Garfiel had challenged him with a glaring intent to kill, but to Reinhard, this all might have been but child's play. The day that Garfiel's vow would be fulfilled remained distant.
In front of Subaru, Reinhard walked slowly across the destroyed lawn. And, as if by some unknown principle, wherever his footsteps touched, the ruined meadow began to recover.
Perhaps this was also the power of the countless Divine Protections he possessed; Subaru scratched his cheek at the casual miracle.
However, it was not just extraordinary power that defined Reinhard. This was what was so terrifying about him.
Echidna: [Given that, I would say that bringing him into your camp can be considered your finest play to this point. I, too, was surprised by your skill.]
Reading Subaru's feelings, Echidna chimed in with her own comment. However, Subaru could not help but nod in agreement. Undoubtedly, it was one of Subaru's greatest achievements.
――The Sword Saint, Reinhard van Astrea.
Currently, he was a Knight affiliated with the Emilia Camp, backed by Roswaal.
Shortly after the Royal Selection had started, the Sword Saint had become Felt's Knight. He had been the greatest adversary he would have had to contend with, and because of his distinguished prominence in the Kingdom, he would have been their greatest threat, but――,
Reinhard: [Subaru?]
Subaru: [Oh sorry, I was kinda spaced out. You always amaze me, no matter how many times I see you.]
Reinhard: [It's just the Divine Protection of Vegetation. It's something that revitalizes the life force of plants and flowers.]
Subaru: [Calling it "just" is already quite something. But, looking at it this way…]
Subaru cracked his neck while Reinhard nonchalantly explained the miracle of his Divine Protection. Then, after a deliberate pause, he uttered the words that followed.
Those were――,
Subaru: [If Felt were to return, I can't help but feel heavy-hearted at the thought of opposing you again.]
Reinhard: [――――]
Subaru: [Reinhard?]
Subaru, as he spoke calmly and without any pretense, furrowed his brow. In response, Reinhard shook his head, "No".
With a slight hint of melancholy upon his perfectly sculpted profile, the Sword Saint, the embodiment of miracles, lowered his gaze.
Reinhard: [I appreciate your concern, but I dare say I would be unable to go back to being Felt-Sama's Knight. That lady has rejected me and judged me as unworthy. Were it not so, she wouldn't have tossed me aside to vanish to whereabouts unknown.]
Reinhard faintly revealed a sense of regret and loneliness. It seemed that he wanted to say he had come to terms with it, but it was obvious that he had not yet sorted it out.
Witnessing Reinhard's pained expression, Subaru cursed his own wickedness.
――Already, nearly a year had passed since Reinhard's master, one of the Royal Selection Candidates, Felt, had disappeared from her Knight.
The girl, tough as a stray cat, had left the Astrea House, taking with her only the old man she regarded as family, and ran away from the Royal Selection. Thus, she cast aside the Sword Saint who had pledged himself to her.
Those were the rumors circulating among the public, and were almost identical to the truth.
In fact, Reinhard had heard nothing from Felt, before being abruptly driven from the Royal Selection. Having been abandoned by the master to whom he had sworn his loyalty, it was not difficult to imagine the sense of helplessness he must have felt.
Subaru had extended his arm out to this, and had dragged him over to this new camp.
With his conscience sullied, Reinhard had taken Subaru's desperate plea, and offered his sword to Emilia as his new lord. And since, the Sword Saint had become the sword of the Emilia Camp, playing a key role in the Royal Selection.
Echidna: [He is the descendant of the Sword Saint who had sealed away the Witch of Envy. It is significant that he stated that he would support the candidate who is despised as a Half-Devil. It is enough to overturn her unfavourable reputation.]
As Echidna pointed out, Reinhard's inclusion drastically altered the dynamics of the Royal Selection.
With the departure of the Felt Camp, and the weakening of the Crusch Camp, the position of the Emilia Camp was greatly strengthened, putting them on par with the Camps of Anastasia and Priscilla.
Truly, it was a situation shaped by Reinhard's involvement.
Even if――,
Echidna: [――Even if it was done by none other than your behest.]
Subaru: [――――]
Echidna: [I guess it's "Ignorance is bliss", as they say in your world's proverbs.]
Subaru ignored the teasing and probing words of Echidna that echoed in his mind.
Instead, he gave Reinhard a smile of concern, lifting the corners of his mouth slightly, and lightly patted the slumped shoulders of his friend. With just a glance at Reinhard's profile as he turned his gaze away, Subaru uttered, "Don't worry about it."
Subaru: [I can't just easily say that I understand how you feel. However, you've been a big help to me. Otherwise, I don't know how many times Garfiel would have beaten me up.]
"That was a close call earlier, too," replied Reinhard with an open smile. Finally, the tension eased from his expression.
Reinhard: [No matter how you look at it, that seems like a groundless worry. Indeed, Garfiel's attitude towards you is harsh, Subaru, but… that is the flip side of him recognizing your strength. However, your strength lies apart from physical power. That's something Garfiel cannot openly express.]
Subaru: [You're being way too generous with your words… And, I've done enough to Garfiel to deserve a grudge.]
Subaru felt sorry for Reinhard, who did not know the whole story, but Garfiel had valid reasons to dislike Subaru. Even Subaru did not know if a day would come where the snow would thaw.
His recklessness in signing a Contract with Echidna and working to liberate the Sanctuary had only been possible by ruining and trampling upon the days Garfiel had accumulated.
From Garfiel's perspective, being left completely out of a crisis in his own homeland and finding out that even his trusted grandmother had cooperated behind his back — Subaru could only guess at how he felt, but any sympathy on his part would be nothing more than hypocrisy.
As a result, the Sanctuary was saved without any sacrifices.
But Garfiel, too, could not do anything either. That was the crux of the matter.
Without the persuasion of Ram, Frederica, and Ryuzu, Garfiel might not have even joined the Emilia Camp. If that had happened, the camp would have lost a crucial force until Reinhard joined, and that would have been a huge loss.
Subaru: [No…]
And, biting his molars at his own thoughts, Subaru forcefully pressed his fist against his forehead.
He was reflecting on how he had failed to grasp Garfiel's emotions and could not help but feel apologetic. But how did this take him to the position of seeing Garfiel as nothing more than a battle asset?
Did Garfiel despise Subaru because he could see through this thinking?
Subaru: [But, could that too be resolved if he continues to practice with Reinhard?]
The crux of Garfiel's resentment lay in his own lack of strength.
If that was the case, then by setting Reinhard as a clear goal, learning about the strength of the Sword Saint, and gradually getting closer, would things change little by little? Would he be able to forgive Subaru someday?
Would the wounds that Subaru was unable to prevent in the Sanctuary eventually heal?
Subaru: [If that's what it takes to get him to open up to me, then it'll be worth it.]
Reinhard: [Surely, one day he will understand your feelings, Subaru. There's no need to be impatient.]
Reinhard shook his head, gesturing consolation at Subaru's half-hearted conclusion. And then, the red-haired Knight turned his eyes towards the mansion,
Reinhard: [I want you to leave Garfiel to me for just a little while longer… That's if you still have any expectations from me, the one who was not even able to acquire Felt-sama's trust.]
Subaru: [Don't be so pitiful. If I can't trust in you, who can I trust?. Yeah, I've got expectations for you.]
Reinhard: [Understood. Then, you too should do what is expected of you. ――That is the duty of the One and Only Knight.]
It was only in those parting words that Reinhard had shown some kind of emotion.
The One and Only Knight―― that term was only permitted in master-servant relationships that were tied together by the strongest of bonds. Reinhard had not been able to become that for Felt.
He didn't wish for Subaru to turn out the same way; that was the feeling being expressed.
Reinhard: [Well then, I will see you later.]
Without even revealing such sentimentality on his facial expression, Reinhard gave Subaru a clap on his shoulder and left the garden. Behind him, as he walked away, the landscaping, which was supposed to have been razed to the ground, was completely restored.
Standing on the grass, Subaru made sure that Reinhard had completely left, and let out a long sigh.
Considering the lie he had just told, feeling repugnance might have been more accurate than a sigh.
Subaru: [How dare I even…]
Echidna: [My, what a magnificent acting performance. Your skin grows thicker by the day.]
Subaru: [――――]
Once again, he heard the voice of the Witch who kept breaking her promise, but Subaru had nothing to say to her observation.
Taking his silence as permission to speak, Echidna transmitted her thought-waves from the Magic Crystal,
Echidna: [Hey, hey, no need to be so down. To begin with, were you not the one who brought up Reinhard in the first place? That you needed a sword to oppose the Witch Cult?]
Subaru: [I'm aware. I was the one who planned it, and the one who executed it.]
Echidna: [Originally, that girl―― Felt had no interest in the Royal Selection in the slightest. So, she jumped at the chance when she was offered an escape route with no consequences. Of course, you made a few threats about revealing the identity of that old giant man. But, it was only the difference between early or late.]
Whether it was meant as consolation or not, Echidna's remarks carefully peeled away Subaru's pressure scabs.
Reinhard, who had encouraged him in vain, had nothing to do with the reason as to why Felt had abandoned him. All of it was the result of Natsuki Subaru's secret machinations.
If the truth were to be discovered, scorn and denunciation would be inevitable.
Echidna: [In order to save your beloved girlfriend, you needed strength to fight off the Witch Cult's malice. No one can be saved by charm alone. You made the correct judgment. It was a neccessary choice]
Subaru: [Shut up.]
Echidna: [The damage to the Watergate City was kept to a minimum because of that choice. How could you have resisted the disaster that befell such a populated city without Reinhard?]
Echidna's words, accreting on top of each other, cut Subaru like a blade rather than comforting him.
The deceptions that were laid out to justify his actions were naught but piles of filth to Subaru. An ordeal he had to accept, swallow, and store as his own nourishment.
The Trial that he thought he had overcome at the tomb seemed to be continuing in the outside world.
――To save everything, strength was needed.
The memories of the future and the experiences he possessed were insufficient to cover the despair that existed in this world.
If he had been able to compromise, he might have been able to overcome his hardships more easily. However, Subaru could not be so strong or weak to tolerate self-sacrifice for the sake of sacrifice.
To accept giving up, to permit compromise, to turn a blind eye to sacrifices, there would be no point in that.
If he were to stop weighing his own life on the scales, the meaning of taking the Witch's hand would disappear.
Therefore, he had been working tirelessly to gather the necessary strength, to gather the necessary forces.
Echidna: [As a result, you have entrapped Reinhard van Astrea, and won him over to your side.]
To accomplish this, it was necessary for Felt to withdraw from the Royal Selection―― the trial and errors that had accreted for this reason made the struggle against Clind seem almost endearing.
How difficult must it have been for him, to deceive Reinhard under his watchful eyes?
It was more difficult than deceiving any other existence in this world.
Echidna: [But, you did it. In the end, not a single person was harmed.]
Subaru: [――――]
Echidna: [By now, she should be living peacefully together with her family in Kararagi. I am sure that this is the best thing for her as well. The fate of her blood is a harsh one for her.]
This scenario imagined by Echidna, in fact, brought no solace to Subaru.
If there was only one thing that could save Subaru from his diabolical scheming, it was the indisputable fact that no one had been harmed.
Only that outcome could be salvation for Natsuki Subaru.
It did not matter how many times his heart would be wounded, so long as he could save their lives――.
Subaru: [Where there is life… there is a future. Where there is a future, there is hope. Where there is hope, there is possibility. Where there is possibility――]
Echidna: [――People can be saved. You are correct. You are not wrong. I can guarantee so.]
Subaru: [I don't particularly need your guarantees, you know…]
Subaru spoke out his innermost thoughts to both cheer himself up, and to caution himself.
The Witch affirmed, understood, shared, and admired that.
While he responded aggressively to those words, it was a fact that he had been saved by the Witch's words.
――Life, was life.
If he was alive, he could start over. He had possibilities. It yielded hope.
Sacrifices were things that were different to Subaru's life. It was worth continuing to always use Return by Death all the time if it protected everyone except for Subaru's own life, which was no longer included in his calculations.
――Even if those whom I wish to save weep, I still wish to save them.
That was the salvation that Subaru had decided to receive by taking the Witch's hand.
△▼△▼△▼△
Having received the Witch of Greed's cruel comfort, Subaru left the courtyard.
Witnessing the morning exercises of Reinhard and Garfiel had nothing to do with Subaru's daily routine; it was just a passing event he had witnessed.
Subaru's real daily routine was――,
Subaru: [――Heya, Beatrice. Sorry to intrude.]
Opening the door at the easternmost part of the mansion, Subaru did not need his sixth sense like before.
That was because this place would never move from where it was again.
Behind the heavy door, greeted by the scent of paper, Subaru closed one eye at the familiar sight. It was a library with a large number of bookshelves lined up and books crammed into the space.
Among the unchanged scenery, there was one thing that was distinctly different from before.
It was the absence of the librarian of the archives, who should have rushed him right as he entered. Sitting on a stepladder, a space where there should have been a young girl waiting with a disgruntled expression to welcome him; however, neither the girl he was waiting for, nor her words of welcome, were present.
Subaru: [――――]
There, curled up in the corner of the room, was a little girl clutching her knees; a sense of loneliness emanated from her.
He should have grown accustomed to this sight, of her resting with her head on her lap, yet it still pained his heart to see her as she was now, compared to the girl he used to know.
Unchanged in her attire, unchanged in her form, only her way of being had completely shifted from before―― Beatrice, there without even a hint of movement.
She slumbered not. That fact was evident from how her fingers hugged her knees with so much force that they were whitened.
The Beatrice who used to greet Subaru with a seemingly grumpy demeanor, yet proudly introducing herself as the librarian; her dignified posture, backed by pride and responsibility; she had lost every trace of her former self.
Narrowing his eyes at her appearance, Subaru briefly let an emotion pass through his chest before blinking it away. Then, he put on a cheerfully idiotic smile, and threw open the curtains of the library.
This place, once called the Forbidden Library, was an isolated space separated from reality.
However, as a result of Beatrice, the librarian, abandoning her role and relinquishing the concealment of the space via Door Crossing, it had manifested itself in reality, looking just like an ordinary room.
A breeze blew the curtains open, causing the light from outside to pour in from the window.
Nature that was previously absent in the former Forbidden Library, now boldly crossing the threshold.
Subaru: [Heyyy, Beako. Today's another splendid morning. There's a pleasant breeze blowing by. Isn't it about time you stopped hiding in this musty old room and went outside to play?]
Beatrice: [――――]
Subaru: [If you don't want to muddy your dress up by playing outside, then at the very least, let's eat together with everyone. Come to the dining hall like before. It's not too much to ask, right?]
Beatrice: [――――]
With the window and curtains wide open, Subaru smiled warmly with the sunshine and breeze on his back.
However, despite his candid invitation, Beatrice remained silent with her face hidden. The girl, clutching her knees tightly, almost seemed like she was punishing herself in Subaru's eyes.
Subaru: [Hey, Beako…]
Beatrice: […Just shut the hell up, in fact.]
Subaru: [――――]
Unable to bear the sight of her, Subaru tried to approach her, but Beatrice spoke out.
Her voice sank heavily, growing hoarse. But, after hearing her voice, Subaru felt happy. Because, recently, just hearing her voice was a rare occurrence.
So, even though her words were a solemn refusal, it made Subaru feel content.
Casting aside Subaru's thoughts, Beatrice continued without raising her face.
Beatrice: [Betty is tired. She's already given up, I suppose. Going against Mother's instructions… breaking the Contract… and despite that, still being alive… why?]
Subaru: [Beatrice…]
Beatrice: [You, if only you had just abandoned me back then… why, why did you come to help me, in fact…? Who even asked you, you, who are not even That Person… hk!]
It was a resentment that would never disappear, a grudge that could never fade, a penitence that she could never forgive――.
In her four hundred years, Beatrice had bore those feelings alone, yet her heroic determination that had refused to relinquish such thoughts had been trampled upon, naturally bringing hatred.
Within the Forbidden Library, there was a Spirit who was prepared to abandon her mission; but, despite her resolve, she was spared.
Her eternal life had stripped hope from her, and all she had been given was time to live a life devoid of meaning.
Having relinquished the responsibility of managing the closed-off Forbidden Library, the long, long thread that had held Beatrice together finally snapped. and she had been left imprisoned in the death she had been prepared for. As a result, Beatrice was trapped in the Death she had prepared for.
She had given up her mission, thrown it away, and betrayed the mother who had believed in her.
The atonement for that was something she could no longer achieve herself. She had completely given up on that.
The weight of her strong sense of responsibility had become chains, binding the small Beatrice's soul.
Ever since the night she gave up her mission, she had spent endless hours crouched in a corner of the library, crying without end.
Even so――,
Beatrice: [――hk! Go away! Let go, I suppose! Don't you touch Betty… tch!]
Unable to bear seeing her small figure in such a state, Subaru wrapped her body into a hug.
Shouting at him as he embraced her, Beatrice made no attempt to hide her disgust and rage, scoring Subaru's neck with her nails. Caught in her merciless attack, drops of blood oozed out of his wounds. But still, he would not let go.
He hugged her in an attempt to comfort her diminutive, shivering body.
But, perhaps it was actually Subaru who sought comfort in that act.
Beatrice: [Why, why did you come to see me, I suppose…! You're so, you're so…!]
Subaru: [No matter how many times you vent your anger at me, I'll be here. Even if the flames of regret don't seem like they're vanishing right now, if you keep pouring them out, maybe they'll vanish someday.]
Beatrice: [They're not, supposed to vanish, in fact…! Betty is!]
Subaru: [I'm so glad that you're alive. So, I'll always look forward to the day where you'll stand before me with a pout once again. ――That hope is there, because you are still alive.]
Beatrice: [――hk]
After those gentle, sincere words were spoken, Beatrice's resistance subsided.
Without moving, Beatrice looked stunned, but then absently began to sob. It was a sign that she would no longer be able to continue this conversation.
――Once every two weeks, Subaru and Beatrice would exchange temper and stillness in such a way.
After releasing her from his embrace, Beatrice once again buried her forehead into her knees. And, after that, Subaru had nothing more to say to the girl who had retreated into her own shell.
Subaru's words still were unable to manage open the door to her Beatrice's heart.
Nevertheless, if he beat relentlessly against that door, maybe one day, they would open. ――The mere possibility of this hope, was hope itself.
Subaru: […Back then, I wonder if I should have lied and told her I was That Person.]
Exiting the library and leaving Beatrice behind, whilst leaning his back to the door, Subaru recollected this.
Holding out hope that Subaru was indeed That Person, after the attack on the mansion, Beatrice had been prepared for the end of her long, long mission. However, both hope and resignation betrayed her.
For four hundred years, a girl eagerly longed for the arrival of That Person to take her away from the Forbidden Library. Should Subaru have deceived her, and lied about being That Person?
If he had done so, would her heart have been saved, and would she have relinquished the Forbidden Library with a smile on her face?
Subaru: [The book in that room…]
Echidna: [Beatrice has relinquished her role as librarian and has released the Forbidden Library. At that moment, all the books in the library turned blank. It was designed that way from the outset.]
Subaru: […You do some seriously ill-natured things.]
Echidna: [It is simply a precautionary measure. If Beatrice were to be killed, I could not let the library be stolen.]
Beatrice continued to sit in the library, which no longer possessed any value or reason to protect.
As if to irritate Subaru and his feelings for her, Echidna revealed the truth in a matter-of-fact manner. It was a precaution to prevent Beatrice from being killed―― no, it was a precautionary measure to prevent knowledge from leaking out.
In the end, the feelings of Beatrice, who had been thinking of her mother for four hundred years, and the feelings that Echidna had induced, were vastly different.
Echidna: [Of course, the fact that the Forbidden Library is lost cannot be undone. Accepting the irretrievable loss of knowledge without inheritance is quite painful for me, but it cannot be helped. Though for you, compared to that knowledge, that Beatrice's life was saved is what matters most, is it not?]
Subaru: [――Hk! If you hadn't told her to wait for That Person…!]
Echidna: [Wait a second; no matter how you look at it, is that not sidestepping logic? I had my own reasons. Of course, responsibility for Beatrice's long solitude does fall upon my shoulders. But, my intent was certainly not one of forcing misfortune upon that child. I do hope you understand.]
Having received Echidna's objections, Subaru, aware that he was taking his anger out on her, hesitated.
The Witch's words were correct. In the end, when Subaru blamed Echidna, he was just shifting the responsibility from what he himself could not do.
Subaru: […In the end, That Person; who was it?]
Echidna: [Regretfully, I cannot let that slip from my mouth. Since the Forbidden Library has lost its role, discussing it would be meaningless. Even if you were to find out who it was, he would not know about it anymore.]
Subaru: [He… which means, it's a man?]
Echidna: [――. Did my mouth slip? But, every way of finding him is gone now. In the first place, assuming you were to find him, what would you do? Would you introduce him to Beatrice? Or, do you intend to impose a sanction on him? In that case, what would be the charge? The person in question would certainly be unaware of it; a crime that does not exist cannot be sanctioned. Moreover, it is not as if you have the leisure.]
Irrefutable were Echidna's conversational tactics, leading Subaru to click his tongue.
As a matter of fact, everything spoken by the Witch was probably correct. He could not find any flaws. He could not judge them. Subaru did not have the time to do such a thing.
Echidna: [Beatrice truly did spend that time in pity. But, that is not to say that the future would remain so, and there is no indication for us to think thus. Incidentally, it is just as you said.]
Subaru: [――――]
Echidna: [Even if devastated by regret right now, there will come a day where that child will be freed. When that happens, someone will come to accept that child. Perhaps someone that is you, perhaps someone that is not. That is the possibility that living offers.]
It was sophistry. It was merely a front of benevolence.
But, that doubtlessly was also hope.
It seemed like cajolery from Echidna, but if there was that possibility, then Subaru had no choice but to believe her words.
Thus Subaru, no matter how clear it was that the Witch with whom he was contracted was verbally toying with him, he could not deny her point. He could only cling to it, rely on it.
On her, as his only accomplice, keeping Subaru aware of his sins, allowing him not to forget was her presence.
Subaru: [Just like parallel lines.]
Echidna: [Ah, like parallel lines indeed.]
In the end, finishing their conversation thus, was Subaru and Echidna's manner of confronting their sins.
Entrusting hope to the future, believing in the paths to possibility, awaiting the arrival of the ideal day.
It mattered not how many chances he had, Subaru would always find himself back in this place.
Knowing that Beatrice had relinquished her mission, had been prepared to face Death, and had entrusted her last hope to Subaru, only to be betrayed and to break down in tears day after day, he still wanted her to live.
Thus, clinging onto hope, he kept walking forward through thick and thin, through thick and thin.
――That he will be saved. That he was saved.
Today as well, he made these words his motivation for the future; he prayed that hope would flourish.
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???: [Oh myyy~, but if it isn't Subaru-saaama~! On your way back from visiting Beatrice?]
Subaru: [――――]
Suddenly, Subaru heard a voice from behind him as he walked through the corridor, causing him to reflexively stop in his tracks.
He instantaneously recognized the speaker from the tone and cadence of his voice. For that reason, he regretted stopping, but he could not ignore it as he had already stopped walking.
He turned around in displeasure, and directly behind Subaru stood the other figure, leisurely.
Subaru: [Roswaal, huh?]
Roswaal: [Mhhm, that's me of course. Good morning. How was Beatrice today?]
Subaru: […It's been a while since she's treated me so haughtily. Well, anticipate some progress from now on.]
Roswaal: [I see… Looks like you took quite the beeeating~, though?]
Roswaal narrowed his differently colored eyes as he received Subaru's dispirited reply.
His gaze was fixed upon Subaru's neck. There, were the painful scratches Beatrice had given him with her nails a short while ago.
Roswaal: [Unfortunately, I've never been skilled at treating injuries, and I won't be able to heal those wounds. The only ones capable of using Healing Magic are… Beatrice, Garfiel, and Emilia-sama.]
Subaru: [The first two would be a bit difficult to ask. I could ask Emilia… well, I'll think about it.]
Roswaal: [If you were to ask her, I am sure she'd definitely heal you right up. Or perhaps, could it be that to you, the ache of these wounds provide some sort of comfort?]
Subaru: [――――]
In place of the reticent Subaru, each of Roswaal's discursive words were as painfully sharp as a razor.
The last comment in particular hit him directly. Subaru narrowed his eyes, and so Roswaal shrugged his shoulders in a clown-like gesture, blatantly feigning ignorance.
The clownish makeup and exotic attire, Roswaal's appearance and attitude had in no way changed―― his way of interacting with Subaru, his respectful and admiring attitude, had also remained the same.
Roswaal respected Subaru, acknowledging him as his savior.
He understood that salvation could be brought about in any manner, and accepted it with understanding.
Roswaal: [No need to worry, Subaru-sama. If you make use of your time, I am sure you'll find a solution; no matter what the method, you will dedicate yourself to finding the optimal way. If your desire is to save Beatrice's heart, such a method will one day fall within your grasp. There's no need at all to feel aaanxious~.]
Subaru: [You make it sound so easy. There's no way it'll be that convenient.]
Roswaal: [You're too modest. ――Besides, I don't think that it's easy, either. But, that mere fact doesn't cloud all of your achievements to date, that's all I was saying.]
Bowing reverently, Roswaal gave thorough praise for Subaru's achievements.
As a matter of fact, only Echidna, who was contracted with Subaru, knew about his Authority of Return by Death. But, Roswaal had an understanding of his Authority to be similar to Redoing. Roswaal evaluated that fact and his achievements together.
As Echidna held no tangible power, it was no exaggeration to say that Roswaal valued and supported Subaru the most in the truest sense.
Roswaal: [At the Royal Capital, at my mansion, and once again at the Royal Capital. And then, at the Sanctuary, and the Watergate City. ――You have made it this far without letting anything slip through your fingers. Indisputable are your achievements, feats you alone have accomplished. There will come a day when you will fulfill my long-cherished wish, and for that I offer my utmost support. Please make full use of it.]
Subaru: [You sure are optimistic… Don't be so sure that I'll dance on the palm of your hand.]
Roswaal: [But, you desire the blood of the Dragon. Without it, that girl―― Rem will never awaken. Having reached that conclusion, you need Emilia-sama to become King. Isn't that right?]
Roswaal gave him a low, searching expression, and Subaru in kind returned a sharp, cold look.
It was a relationship of mutual cooperation, established on choppy waters, in which both of them knew each other's critical points.
Roswaal would accomplish his goal by utilizing Subaru's Return by Death, all the while putting Subaru in situations whereby he must gradually achieve this.
And though Subaru knew of those intentions, for the sake of saving the still-slumbering Rem, he had no choice but to advance them.
Roswaal: [Oh, but it won't be a bad deal. You do your thing, I'll do mine, and in any case, we'll both have our desires become reality. To that end, we'll make use of each other. That's all there is to it.]
Subaru: [――――]
Roswaal: [My strength should prove useful. I've devoted nearly four hundred years anticipating this occasion. And for me, your power will be the same, isn't that so?]
Subaru could give no objections to Roswaal's conviction.
He had arrived at that answer when he had discovered Roswaal's treachery all the way back at the Sanctuary.
Whether for the sake of the Royal Selection, or as a means of blocking against coming hindrances, being without Roswaal's presence was absolutely unallowable for Subaru and the camp.
Even if he was just planning on using Subaru to materialize his own wishes.
Subaru: [If you were honest about your true intentions and just told me what you wanted, maybe I would help you without being so stubborn.]
Roswaal: [What a shame, I'm afraid that's impossible. You would never choose that path.]
Whenever Subaru would try to approach him even in the slightest, Roswaal would immediately push him away.
This familiar exchange brought a wry smile to Subaru's lips, and Roswaal chuckled ostentatiously.
Roswaal: [Especially if you're not conscious of it yourself. You always push forward with your sole priority. Any obstructions, anything or anyone that could cause you to stumble; regardless of the circumstances, you will discard even their dearest wishes. You can do that. You have proven it. This all has already been decided, hence why you've become my trump card.]
Subaru: [――――]
Roswaal: [Isn't this wonderful? I'll take care of my side, you'll take care of yours, freely fulfilling our wishes. If it's impossible even like this, that merely indicates that the one with unfulfilled wishes lacked sufficient desire.]
Subaru: […Ah, is that so?]
Subaru already understood that Roswaal's crazed dedication was what was supporting him.
And, the root from which it came, his refusal to speak candidly about it was also thus.
With this in mind, Subaru ended the conversation with Roswaal, and finally started to walk away. With a posture that showed just how much Roswaal was detached from his heart, as Roswaal yet stood still,
Roswaal: [Ahhh, yes. Right about now, Ram should be in Rem's room. I'm letting you know, just in case.]
Subaru: [――――]
Unable to respond, Subaru rounded the corner and escaped from his gaze.
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――The Contract with the Witch at the Sanctuary fundamentally changed Natsuki Subaru's way of existence.
It was a transformation of the world as Subaru perceived it, the world as he experienced it, and the world as he walked through it; he was destined to no longer live the same way he had before.
Naturally, it was inevitable that countless changes would come to Subaru both within the mansion, which was his base of activities, and outside of it, but her change was perhaps the one that had the greatest impact and caused the most discomfort among the changes he experienced.
After all――,
???: [――Thank you very much for going out of your way to visit my unworthy sister, Natsuki Subaru-sama.]
Saying this, the one who bowed deeply to Subaru as he entered the room was a pink-haired maid―― Ram, whose character was the very picture of arrogance and insolence.
Subaru: [――――]
After the events at the Sanctuary and the subsequent commendation ceremony, Ram's attitude had shifted drastically, and she no longer approached Subaru with the same familiarity as before.
This new attitude, however, made Subaru feel extremely suffocated.
Ram: [――? Is something the matter, Natsuki Subaru-sama?]
Subaru: […No, it's just that no matter how much time passes, I'll never get used to your attitude.]
Ram: […Again, many apologies for my prior rudeness. Ram's ignorance and lack of awareness caused great inconveniences to Natsuki Subaru-sama. But, since Roswaal-sama and Emilia-sama have given orders to show Natsuki-sama the utmost respect, that will not be the case again. Kindly rest assured.]
Without changing her expression, Ram replied to Subaru in a manner any dignified maid ought to.
There was no trace of familiarity or sense of closeness which could have been interpreted as friendliness in her behavior, as there had been once before. Between Subaru and Ram, an invisible wall had emerged before he knew it.
――No, if there was a wall, then there would have been a way to scale it. Rather, there was no way of surmounting it; more precisely, it was an invisible gap.
Ram held Roswaal in high esteem, and adored him. When Roswaal had changed the way he acted towards Subaru, the value of Subaru's presence also changed dramatically for Ram.
The result was this current attitude, where she regarded Subaru as someone she respected.
Averting his gaze away from that Ram, Subaru approached the middle of the room―― the reason why he had come to this room, the blue-haired girl who slept on a bed.
Lying on her back, her figure remained unchanged for over two years―― that girl, was Rem.
He had made a vow to awaken her, and yet, he still had not achieved the conviction needed to fulfill that vow. Time alone was mercilessly leaving this girl behind.
Subaru: [Have there been any changes with Rem?]
Ram: [There have been none. She still continues to sleep… With so many other problems to deal with, Ram has no words to apologize for the worry her foolish sister has been causing you.]
Subaru: [Don't talk like that. Rem… thinking about Rem is absolutely not useless. Never say that again.]
Ram: [――Understood, sir.]
Ram responded curtly to Subaru's firm order.
There was no dissatisfaction, nor complaint; no relief, nor gratitude.
In regards to her younger sister named Rem, Ram had no actual feelings or appreciation for her. Although she formally recognized that Rem was her sister, in the depths of her heart she probably had no room for Rem.
Her heart was completely centered on her loyalty to Roswaal.
This was heavily influenced by the actions of Subaru, who had made the choice to go along with Roswaal's intentions, resulting in Ram's cherished wish meeting its end.
Even if Rem were to awaken, would her heart once again have room for her little sister?
The older sister who was so adored, and the younger sister who was so doted upon: could these sisters ever return?
Subaru: [――Hk. Ram, I'm sorry, but I'd like to be alone with Rem.]
Ram: […As you wish. Do call if you need anything.]
Grinding his teeth at the shuddering thought, Subaru felt terrified at being in the same room as Ram. Miraculously, before his trembling voice could escape, she removed her presence from the room.
Fortunately, Ram did not object to Subaru's words, and instead bowed graciously and quietly headed for the door.
At the sound of her receding footsteps, Subaru let out a sigh of relief――,
Ram: [――Ah, that's right, Natsuki Subaru-sama.]
Subaru: [Wh-What is it? Did you forget to say something?]
Ram: [Yes. ――Annerose-sama has sent a letter regarding Frederica's condition.]
As Ram halted, Subaru was taken aback; her words that followed caused him to catch his breath.
The two names that were mentioned―― Frederica and Annerose, neither of them were at the Roswaal mansion. Annerose, of course, was in her own mansion, and Frederica was accompanying her.
The official reason was to send her as a caretaker for Annerose, who had lost her steward. However, everyone, including Frederica herself, knew that it was in fact out of consideration for Frederica's heart.
He had visited the Miload mansion several times, but Frederica's stouthearted behaviour was painful to watch, and there was no prospect of her returning to be a maid at the Roswaal mansion.
Ram: [Apparently, she still is having difficulty concentrating. Annerose-sama is concerned as well, and in this circumstance, she is considering allowing her return to Ryuzu-sama.]
Subaru: […I understand. I'll discuss it with Emilia and Roswaal. What are your thoughts?]
Ram: [There is no need to be so forward with my opinion. By all means, do as you please.]
Politely bowing her head, she refused to give her thoughts when prompted. In the past, Ram would have offered her opinion even without Subaru asking for it. However, now she was well aware of her position.
Once again, the eerie sensation of dealing with someone who seemed like a completely different person surged within Subaru's heart.
Considering Frederica, this was yet another terribly depressing event for Subaru.
While the elimination of Clind was inevitable, the fact that Frederica was present at the ceremony was another cruel twist of fate. Of course, Subaru, out of consideration for Frederica, had tried to keep her away from the venue and as he attempted to deal with Clind.
However, without Frederica's presence, it was impossible to reduce the damage, apart from that done to Clind, to zero. Quite literally, Frederica was Clind's Achilles' heel.
Therefore, no choice remained but to utilize Frederica's presence to strike at that weak point.
As a result, Frederica had suffered deep, emotional scars from which she had yet to recover.
Ram: [――――]
Quiet, pale light-crimson eyes stared intently at the silent Subaru.
Under that piercing gaze, he felt as though he was being accused. In fact, being accused outright might have been much better.
He even wished for Ram to call him "Barusu" in her cold tone and for her to insult him again.
But, he could not ask that. Even if he were to command her to call him that, it would be meaningless.
Subaru: […I'll think about it carefully.]
Ram: [Yes, understood. Please, take care.]
Once again, Ram bowed to Subaru after relaying her message, and this time, she left the room. As the sound of the closing door echoed, Subaru's shoulders slumped, and he let out a long sigh.
It had been suffocating. Honestly, so long as he kept his guard up, he felt suffocated no matter where he was, but it was especially stifling when he was with Ram.
Escaping that smothering feeling, Subaru turned his attention back to the bed. Finally, the only two left in the room were Subaru and Rem, who continued to sleep.
Subaru: […Rem.]
Rem: [――――]
Lying on the bed, the girl, who simply breathed over and over again in a manner which could not be called mere sleep, replied not. The slight rise and fall of her chest, and the warmth of the blood in her body, were the only signs of life within Rem.
Visiting this place, making sure to take her hand, to check for a weak pulse; that was all that Subaru could do for Rem. It was the only comfort Subaru allowed himself.
Subaru: […Echidna.]
Echidna: [――For you to call out to me here, is truly a rarity.]
As he sat by her bedside, gently holding Rem's hand, Echidna replied to Subaru's call.
The Witch, the one he knew all too well to speak without being called upon, silently waited for a response from Subaru, who was submerged in the lukewarm water of his emotions.
Gradually, the silence continued; it lasted for a dozen seconds, or perhaps a few minutes.
Subaru: [The way to wake Rem… it hasn't changed, has it?]
Echidna: [Oh, there are no new discoveries. The only way would be to reclaim her from the Sin Archbishop of Gluttony, the one who put her in this sleep… but, that is not realistic, considering the likelihood of encountering the Sin Archbishop of Gluttony. Even if you were to hypothetically use your beloved as bait――]
Subaru: [Echidna.]
Echidna: [My apologies, that was only a joke. Anyway, the Sin Archbishop is in hiding, not showing themselves. If you could make contact with them, I am sure there would be numerous ways of making them talk utilizing your Authority.]
Subaru: [That's right. Of course, that's right. If I can manage to find them, catch them, and force them to tell me how to reawaken Rem, I can challenge them tens of thousands of times. Even so…]
They were nowhere to be found. The Sin Archbishop of Gluttony, that despicable blasphemer, never revealed themselves.
Even during the unprecedented catastrophe that had struck the Watergate City of Pristella, the scene of the horrific terrorist attack perpetuated by the Witch Cult, Gluttony did not appear.
――Why, why, why, why, why: that question filled his mind.
Subaru: [No matter what I do, I can't find that damn Gluttony. That's why…]
Echidna: [――That is why, you have no choice but to obtain the Dragon's Blood.]
Subaru's denied wish was met with a glimmer of hope offered by the Witch.
Subaru shifted his bloodshot eyes and stared at the Magic Crystal hanging at his chest. Although he was unable to see the Witch of Greed, she must have been able to see Subaru.
The image of a challenger marching along an infinite path, clinging to the slimmest of hopes.
Subaru: [――With the Dragon's Blood, I can wake up Rem.]
Echidna: [I refer to the Divine Dragon. Using the omnipotent power contained in the blood of its heart, I believe you should be able to release the girl's soul from her sleep.]
Echidna's words were naught but speculation. But, it was a convincing speculation.
Though she had spoken without making explicit statements, the words of the Witch resounded forcefully. Thus, for now, Subaru believed that this was the way to save Rem.
The Dragon's Blood was considered to be one of the treasures which the Divine Dragon Volcanica had bestowed unto the Kingdom of Lugunica.
It brought plentiful harvest to the lands, kept away every disease, and had the possibility of granting miracles.
It could only be used by people with the highest pedigrees of social status within the Kingdom.
In other words, it was those who――,
Subaru: [If you ascend to the throne, you can get your hands on it.]
Echidna: [Of course. ――It is for that reason that you must make her, your beloved, King.]
Subaru: [――――]
Echidna: [Back your beloved, support her, and make her King whilst you save those whom you wish to save. And only when you obtain the Dragon's Blood, will you be able to save Rem.]
The words of Echidna seeped into Subaru's mind like a poison.
In order to save Rem, Emilia needed to become King. Making Emilia King, and fulfilling Emilia's wishes, were among the goals that Subaru aimed to achieve.
It was of utmost importance. Supporting Emilia would result in saving Rem.
Make Emilia King, to save Rem.
In the end, Rem would be saved thanks to Subaru's desire to make Emilia King.
Therefore――,
Echidna: [Therefore…]
Subaru: [Stop it, you dumbass… Don't try and shake my determination like that every time you can. Why are you trying to lower my opinion of Emilia like that?]
Echidna: [That was not my intention though?]
Subaru: [You're not very convincing. We've repeated this conversation many times, dozens of times, hundreds of times.]
As if to brainwash him, the Witch would often pour poison into Subaru's mind.
To change Subaru's aims, she attempted to undermine his valuation of Emilia. But, that was a line that Subaru would not cross. If he were to make that mistake, Natsuki Subaru would lose the qualification to trample upon his own corpses that he had sacrificed so far.
Subaru: [You shouldn't let your selfish feelings get in the way. No matter what you harbor against Emilia.]
Echidna: [That is a misunderstanding. Well, no matter how much I say, your thoughts will never meet mine; we are like parallel lines.]
Subaru: [We've had this conversation over and over again, and each time you say that we're like parallel lines.]
In this partnership with Echidna, there were times like these where he could never let his guard down.
The Witch claimed to be Subaru's accomplice, and by lending Subaru her wisdom as a contribution, she planned to exploit not only Subaru's Return by Death, but also Subaru's very way of being.
Although, thanks to her always being naive in the end, he had managed to avoid those poisonous fangs.
Subaru: [I'll get my hands on the Dragon's Blood. By making Emilia King. ――But, that's not something I'm only gonna do to save Rem. Making Emilia King will lead to saving Rem. My original intention remains the same. Make no mistakes there.]
Echidna: [My, my. I would not mind it if you were to dance to my tune occasionally. If you never let down your guard even a bit, I will not be able to save face as a Witch, you know?]
Subaru: [Your execution is too naive. …Or rather, perhaps, you're too naive at the core. You're not cut out to be a complete villain. That's helped me so far.]
Echidna: [I see. I will try to keep that in mind.]
Echidna admitted her defeat with surprising readiness. Even if she attempted to use this as a lesson for next time, she probably would not be able to do so.
The reason for that, was because one's nature cannot be so easily changed. Because it is not something that can be changed.
Natsuki Subaru would always be Natsuki Subaru, no matter what befell him.
The Witch of Greed, Echidna, would only ever be the Witch of Greed, Echidna.
One has no choice but to live armed with that which cannot be changed.
Because, in life, one can only play with the cards they are dealt.
Subaru: [――Rem, wait for me. For sure, I'm gonna wake you up. That's why…]
――No matter how many times he would die.
His resolve was not exaggerated, and the stakes were not something to be surrendered lightly.
Regardless of how many times he threw it away, he would continue to spend his inextinguishable life. If that eventually led to her waking up, he would feel no regrets.
Just that much, just that much, just that would be good enough.
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