Ren woke up from his restless slumber as the morning sun peeked through the room's thin curtains. His limbs ached from the weight of two lives pulling him in opposing directions, not from physical strain. Even though he wasn't an idol trainee, the agency Ayaka put him in touch with had agreed to mentor him, so he was training hard now. He would rush off for hours of vocal and physical training every evening after studio recordings. The cost was beginning to mount. Ren didn't mind that he hardly had time to breathe. The chaos actually seemed to have a purpose.
Ayaka took note. She seldom spoke, but she always did. She would occasionally give him a silently worried look when Ren thought she was not looking. And just once, he had heard her whispering to Haruto, "He's pushing too hard."
But it was nothing, Ren told himself. Don't worry. I don't care. Simply professionalism.
That was what he hoped.
His heart always beats more quickly when she is around, even though he is exhausted. She had a slight lilt in her voice when she described scenes, and she brushed her hair back when she was thinking. Her smiles were like a shift in gravity. He was frightened.
He was going down. He was aware of it. However, he buried it. His boss was her. His mentor. He's his anchor. Now was not the moment.
In order to believe the truth, he told himself, *I'll bury this. It's only a stage.
That week was Haruto's birthday, and the whole team had made the decision to throw him a little party as a surprise. Ayaka was in charge of the master plan, and plans were discussed in whispered tones.
She smiled and twirled her phone in her hand, declaring, "I'll take him out for a fake meeting. The others prepare everything. Cake, lights, food, decorations, everything."
The mastermind had been Ayaka. She had enticed Haruto out by claiming to be meeting with a significant client. With streamers, fairy lights, a cake that could likely feed a small village, and mountains of wrapped gifts, the rest of the team turned the shared studio lounge into a party paradise.
Music was Ren's responsibility. Others excitedly whispered, blew balloons, and prepared food. It was riotous, exuberant.
The group started working right away. The walls were taped with streamers. The common room was dotted with balloons. Over the door was a banner that said *HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARUTO!*. Ren assisted with carrying drink crates and smuggling the enormous cake into the refrigerator.
It appeared to be a festival by 7:00 p.m.
Under the guise of last-minute script changes, Ayaka had dragged Haruto to a nearby production office in the meantime. Despite his irritation, Haruto remained faithful and followed her through the chilly streets.
The lights were dimmed when they got back.
"Why is this place so dark?" Haruto raised an eyebrow in question.
Reaching for the door handle, Ayaka shrugged. "Perhaps someone neglected to pay the bill?"
The door opened with a creak—
"*SURPRISE!!!*"
Confetti burst in Haruto's face, and he leaped back. The whole crew and cast burst out laughing. The speakers exploded with music. The vibrantly decorated room was revealed as the lights flickered on.
"W-What the devil?" Both excited and slightly appalled, Haruto stumbled. "All of this was planned by you maniacs?"
His eyes narrowed as he turned to face Ayaka.
"You. Your cunning fingerprint is all over this."
Ayaka smiled like a fox and raised her hands. "No. I was merely the bait."
Flustered but obviously touched, Haruto muttered. "This is really embarrassing."
Drinks and a massive buffet table laden with sushi, noodles, grilled meats, and desserts marked the beginning of the celebration. The games started after dinner.
The Games Start.
Games followed cake and food. The first was straightforward: Guess the Lie.
One of the sound engineers, Takuya, said, "All right." "Three declarations. One is false. Go On."
"I dated a voice actress once."
"I can sing opera."
"I've never shed a tear during a dramatic performance."
Someone shouted, "Opera!"
"No. Indeed," Takuya smiled. "I can hit a mean falsetto."
Everyone burst out.
It was Ayaka's turn:
"In high school, I punched someone."
"I detest sweets."
"I once wrote a love letter and got detained for it."
Ren made the second guess. "At your desk, you consume chocolate. Always."
"That's right." She gave him a playful glance.
Ren's heart skipped a beat.
A ridiculous game of Charades followed. They divided into groups.
Everyone guessed "Bird on drugs," but Ren ended up flapping his arms in an attempt to play *Titanic*. Ayaka's drink spilled due to her intense laughter.
Ayaka took the turn, and she was surprisingly animated, miming "Titanic" with her arms swinging around like a crazed octopus. Before Ren yelled, "Damn it, it's the boat scene!" Haruto continued to guess, "alien!"
Team Ren wins.
People screamed when Haruto imitated "The Ring" so well.
They attempted to pop each other's balloons after tying them to their feet. Dancing and dodging like a ninja, Ayaka was unbeaten. Ren gazed, fascinated and amused.
His smile would not go away.
Sashimi platters, steaming hotpots, and grilled seafood made for a magnificent dinner. Gifts for Haruto included personalized headphones, handwritten letters, and a new watch.
"Drink and Dare is the final game."
Everybody pulled a dare from a bowl and took a shot. The dares became increasingly absurd.
"Haruto, give your mother a call and inform her that you have made the decision to become a monk."
"Dance to a nursery rhyme, Ayaka."
"Ren, tell the person on your right what you like best about them."
Ren turned. Ayaka.
His voice was quiet as he said, "I like… your focus."
Ayaka grinned broadly and tilted her head. "I'm grateful."
There was always laughter. People were jokingly fighting over trivia, snacks were flying, and the louder ones were demanding karaoke.
Throughout it all, Ren stealthily looks at Ayaka. Hair tied back, intoxicated by wine and laughter, she was glowing, clapping at the worst singers and singing backup like it was a concert in a stadium.
She was stunning.
More than that. Joy was her.
The party was coming to an end by midnight. People started to leave, some singing, some in pairs. Intoxicated and clinging to the doorframe, Haruto was the last to depart.
"Best. birthday. Ever," he hiccuped.
Only Ren and Ayaka remained.
Their glasses were half-empty as they sat on the couch. On the table was a half-eaten cake. They spoke slowly, their words mingling with long pauses, giggles, and slurs.
Ren laughed and said, "I still can't believe you danced to 'Twinkle Twinkle.'"
Ayaka gestured with her finger. That was referred to as commitment. Unadulterated artistic talent."
Her lips were wine-stained, and her hair was a little untidy. She appeared unguarded and at ease, unlike anything Ren had ever seen. She leaned closer than usual when she spoke, and her laugh was drunken and soft.
Ayaka was giggling across from Ren as he leaned on the couch.
He teased, "You cheated in balloon war!"
She prodded his forehead and remarked, "You're just slow."
Ren kept staring at her. That grin. Her neck's curve. The way her eyes sparkled in the low light.
His smile turned to awe as he gazed at her. the dim lighting. She chuckled. The warmth.
He reached out and gently turned her face toward him before he could stop himself.
Ayaka blinked as she glanced at him.
And he kissed her.
It was gentle at first. Hurry. Ayaka, however, did not retreat. Her hand lay motionless against his chest. Something ignited inside him in that brief moment of consent. The kiss grew more intense. His mouth swept over her jaw, then her neck. She muttered something to him, but the words were obscured by the fog.
The world whirled a little. Possibly due to alcohol. From her, perhaps.
As they sank into the couch, he moved forward and put his hands on her wrists, gently pinning them over her head. His kisses moved downward.
Then he felt her move as he reached for her shirt hem.
Suddenly—
Dazed, Ayaka looked down. "Wh-What?"
With a moan, she pushed him away. "My head."
Sober, Ren froze.
"Ayaka..." With his heart racing, he stammered, "I-I'm sorry. I didn't—"
Her hand gripped her forehead as she staggered to her feet.
"Too much wine... I'm going to bed," she muttered in a slurred voice.
She slapped Ren's hand away when he tried to assist her.
Then she was gone, the door clicking shut as she went up the stairs.
Ren sat by himself.
The background music continued to play softly, now eerie in the quiet.
His face was buried in his hands.
What on earth did I just do?
Panic, shame, and guilt roared through his heart. He didn't intend to go that far. The drinks were the cause. The time. The sensation.
However, the lines he had crossed could not be erased by any excuse.
He pondered how—if—he could ever face her again as he gazed at the now-empty hallway.