The poster was 'Talk about depression'. This was going to happen today. I got into the class, the first class was chemistry
'Nucleophilic substitution reaction in aromatic diazonium' was the topic, the teacher told us about absolute alcohol ( CH3-CH2-OH was a reagent) and how the industrialist saved it from stealing, by mixing it with methanol (CH3-OH) making it poison, a small amount of the mixture could make a human blind, and few more mili liter is enough to kill. After this period it was time for the session, a young age, healthy woman came in and introduced herself as a psychologist, started with her own story of how she gone into depression but I wasn't listening, I was just lost in the memories a year ago how I was going through the first depression of my life (let's call it D1) , there was not a particular reason but a stack of them together making it . My score in fortnightly tests was not increasing. It was constant, I wanted to prepare for Olympiads too but I couldn't make it even though I didn't get a chance in the 1st stage exam. The climate of this new city was the worst.
Earlier that year there was a girl who became my friend. I was thinking of asking her out but her way of talking and attitude were telling me that she did not want a relationship, so I was waiting for the right time later when we met, she told me that got a bf although that boy was very rude, type of bad boy and didn't suit the girl at all I was silent without risking the friendship. A few days later I came to Kota and didn't know where she went and lost my connection. I spent months thinking about how she was. Where is she? But I was hoping she'll be back. She was Samriddhi.
Till the time I was getting better in the mid-cold December, there was another Aftershock waiting and that was my diagnosis with complex partial seizures, mainly the radiological reports indicating hypersensitivity in the hypothalamus, the symptoms of this were very clear like daydreaming and blackouts.
Beeeeee!!......
I could see the moving lips of that woman
But I can't hear anything, nor the noise around me. All of a sudden I saw a boy with ryuk ( from the death note) )-like appearance seemed de-soul entering the class moving towards me, and sitting on the last bench of my row. Slowly, all the colors around me turned black and white
Immediately, I left the class and moved towards the toilet. On the way, I saw a television in the corridor on which Charlie Chaplin's movie 'shoulder arms' based on the World War 1 era was aired. I saw Soldiers being trained on how to use explosives like grenades etc, they exploded a house with bombs. Near the washroom, there were songs playing but all I could hear was the dripping water from the tap in front of me in the washroom and peeeeeeee!!......
I washed my face and came out of the washroom, going back to the class but then heard a whisper "window is open!"
I looked around and there was no one, but an open window in the distance caught my attention. I got near the window and looked outside, I couldn't see anything but it was the absence of darkness, a hot shining sun and a very dry wind started to blow. There was no safety, no glass on that window. I stepped over and remembered the terrace of my house, the view. My left eye was filled with tears after remembering how everyone was very good to me, my family, friends, relatives, and teachers. And as the first drop of tears dripped off my face, I had made a choice, a clear decision in life, and with a smile I........