Noel ends up sleeping for 12 hours straight, and the first thing he does upon waking for real is bolt into the bathroom and throw up.
Once he's done with that, he rinses his mouth and stares at his wan reflection in the mirror. His skin is waxy and ashen, his hair is a tangled mess, and the skin beneath his eyes is bruised despite all the sleep he just got. He feels shaky and hollow, but the pain seems to have abated, and when he probes at his internal energy, it doesn't feel sticky and slow the way it did right after transferring Jade's corruption the last two times.
All in all, he figures, not too bad.
When he finally leaves the bathroom, Jade is standing in the center of the bedroom, staring skeptically at Coppelia as she squirms around in his messy blankets.
"You're awake," Jade says in greeting.
"Yeah," Noel answers pointlessly, leaning against the bathroom doorframe.
Jade scans him up and down, hands on his hips. "Come on," he says at length. "Jacqueline left us lunch."
After eating, Noel feels much more human, and steady enough to take a shower, though he ends up needing to sit down halfway through. When he heads back downstairs for lack of anything better to do, Jade is sitting on the sofa, book in hand. Poe and Coppelia are curled up together at the other end.
"Sorry for, um…taking your bed," Noel offers awkwardly. "All night."
"There are other rooms." Jade doesn't look up, but he also doesn't seem to be reading, staring fixedly at the page in front of him.
"Right. Still. You could have just moved me to my room."
Jade shrugs, finally lifting his gaze. "You should feel lucky," he remarks, lips turning up in a snarky smile. "You're the first person who's ever spent a full night in Jade Ransom's bed."
Noel blinks. "Surely not," he monotones.
"It's a high honor."
Noel doesn't feel very honored. Mostly he feels embarrassed. Rolling his eyes demonstrably, he plops down on the couch cushion beside the cats. Coppelia pops her head up and he scratches it. "Thanks for looking after me," he mumbles.
"What was that? I don't think I heard you?"
Noel glares, earning another annoying smile.
A moment passes in silence. It's pretty surreal, to be sitting on the opposite side of a sofa from the guy he just got off with. The first guy he's ever gotten off with. If he thinks too much about it, impressions from last night start flashing through his head: smooth, burning skin beneath his hands, thick curls between his fingers, a hard body caging him against the bed, low growling in his ear, a thick, rigid cock teasing him through flimsy sweatpants—a cock that's attached to the man across from him—
To distract himself, Noel rubs Coppelia's tummy and lets her grab his hand with all four paws. The sound of a book closing makes him look up again.
"The, uh—that bruise on your wrist," Jade starts haltingly, combing his fingers through his hair. "Did that…I didn't do that, did I?"
Noel blinks in surprise. "Like, last night?"
At Jade's stony look, Noel extracts his hand from the cat-shaped beartrap and tugs his left sleeve up, revealing the discolored skin. The bruise is a deep, painful purple now, blotchy and gross, but still vaguely recognizable as a hand. "It wouldn't be this dark if I only got it last night," he points out.
Jade fidgets with the book in his lap. "I just wanted to make sure," he says defensively. "I didn't see it before, and I felt a bit…out-of-control last night. I couldn't remember if I grabbed you there."
"You didn't," Noel tells him. "Or, you didn't do this, in any case." Something in his chest wriggles at the thought that Jade was worried about hurting him. He's not sure if he likes it or not.
Sharp blue eyes cut to him. "Who did?" Jade asks.
"No one," Noel says quickly, pulling his sleeve back over the bruise, like hiding it might make Jade forget what they're talking about.
"You expect me to believe that?"
"It's a private matter."
"Only an esper would be strong enough to leave a handprint like that." Jade holds his gaze. "And you went to dinner with your family the other day. Was Beckett there?"
Noel curses internally. The last thing he wants right now is to rehash his family drama with Jade Ransom. "He just grabbed me too tightly when I wasn't expecting it," he explains, trying to sound nonchalant. "It was nothing."
Confusion flickers across Jade's face. "Why did he grab you?"
"Does it matter?"
"It's just weird. He's not like me. He's never had issues with controlling his strength. I don't see why he would grab you so hard for no reason."
Noel huffs out a bitter laugh. "He probably just didn't consider the possibility that it would hurt me."
Jade frowns. "That's weird," he reiterates.
"Not if you know about our relationship," Noel mutters. He bites his lower lip, fiddling with the cuff of his sleeve. "Beckett grabbed me to stop me from taking a bit of cake," he recounts, still queasy at the memory. "Because it had strawberry in it."
Jade arches a brow. "Oh, right. The poisoning."
"Near poisoning. Thanks to Beckett, I guess," Noel admits.
"Why'd he stop you if he hates you?"
Noel tilts his head at Jade's thoughtful tone. "Have you ever seen someone in anaphylaxis?" he asks dryly. "Kind of kills the mood. Or maybe he just wanted to emphasize how no one in the family gives a shit about me."
It feels odd to be speaking so candidly about this to someone else. Noel grumbles to himself, both out loud and in his head, about his family issues all the time, but bringing it up with others always felt pointless. He likes his coworkers, but it's not like they could do anything about the situation. Not to mention, talking about it makes him feel like a child, whining for lack of attention. But even though it feels unnatural to be this honest with Jade Ransom, of all people, something about Jade's cavalier interest pulls the truth from his mouth. Maybe he cares so little about what Jade thinks of him that he doesn't mind showing some of his bitterness. He knows Jade isn't going to ditch him, in any case.
"It's still weird," Jade shrugs, laying his arms across the back of the sofa. "There's no reason for him to grab you that hard on purpose."
"It wasn't worth thinking about," Noel contends. "Just like how my allergy isn't worth remembering." He clenches his jaw, heat pricking at his eyes. "Nevermind, I don't wanna—you don't wanna hear all of this." If he keeps going, he fears he might never stop. "The bruise wasn't your fault, I'm fine, don't worry about it."
Jade doesn't look fully convinced, but Noel doesn't know what else to say, and he's categorically done talking about Beckett.
"So, do it again in two weeks?" he asks, voice cracking slightly in the middle.
Jade purses his lips. "Yeah. The Founding Day party is next Friday, so don't get so fucked up you can't guide."
"Trust me, that won't be a problem." Noel gives Jade a proper look for the first time. "How do you feel?" he asks hesitantly. He has no reason to feel so nervous; Jade is obviously fine, but still, Noel's irrational mind is busy inventing all sorts of ways he could have messed up. "How did—it feel? The guiding?"
For a moment, Jade doesn't answer, gazing somewhere over Noel's shoulder and bouncing one foot restlessly. "It felt…" he trails off, bright blue eyes darting to Noel's before flicking to the side. "I feel fine," he says. "Great, actually. Better than…I have in a long time." He swallows, and Noel can't help following the dramatic bob of his Adam's apple beneath smooth brown skin. "And the guiding—" blowing out a breath, Jade runs his hand through his hair again. "If that's what it's supposed to feel like, I guess I get why everyone is fucking thirsty for it."
Noel's heart gives a funny little pang at the reminder that Jade has probably never felt guidance that didn't hurt. It's no wonder he was so…into it last night. "That's…good." Noel nods stupidly. "I'm glad that it felt…good." Jade cuts his gaze back to him and Noel feels his cheeks heat up. "Anyway—good debrief, uh…I'm gonna…I think I'm gonna go back to bed. See you!"
Normally he'd pop to his feet and hurry out of the room, but everything is still a bit wobbly, so he can only shuffle awkwardly over to the stairs, feeling Jade's horrible blue eyes on him the entire way.
----------
"Okay, guys," Tess starts, not even bothering to pretend to keep her voice down in the D-suite break room. "What the hell is going on?"
Noel exchanges a look with Elijah. Catherine takes another sip of coffee.
"In general or in regards to something specific?" Elijah humors Tess's earnest request.
"With Jade Ransom!" Tess clarifies impatiently. "Am I the only one who pays attention to the company message boards?"
"I only check them if someone tags me in something," Elijah responds sheepishly.
"Yeah, I have those notifications off," Catherine says over her mug. "I don't have time for all of that."
Noel shrugs, fighting not to show his discomfort at the mention of Jade. "I guess I check them every once in a while."
Tess lets out a long groan and slumps over the table. "How am I supposed to work under these conditions?" she laments.
"What work?" Catherine scoffs. "I've yet to see you do any work today."
"What's happening with Ransom, Tess?" Elijah asks sportingly.
Noel tries not to grimace and is only partially successful.
Tess shoots up, an eager gleam in her eye. "Everyone is talking about it," she says.
"Clearly not," Noel quips under his breath.
She ignores him. "You know how Ransom has always been kind of a dick?" she asks. "I mean, remember when he came looking for Noel?"
"He was really rude," Catherine agrees.
"Right! And everyone knows he's a jerk—like even when those magazines and websites talk about him, they'll call him aloof and stuff, because they can't say he's an asshole. Everyone at Halo for sure thinks he's a dick. But—" Tess leans forward on her elbows. "Now he's suddenly acting nice."
Noel nearly spits out the sip of water he'd just taken. "Nice?" he repeats incredulously.
"Well, not nice as in friendly, but nice as in no longer stalking through the halls like a predator, or snapping at people for talking to him."
"So he finally learned some manners," Catherine says. "Good for him, but it doesn't seem worth throwing a party over."
"Ugh, you're missing the point!" Tess protests. "This is new. All the upper class guide and esper chats are talking about it. It's like he went home one day normal and came back the next a whole new person."
"Why are you in the upper class guide and esper chats?" Elijah asks.
"Elijah, you're the only one who hasn't figured out how to trick the system into letting you access whatever chat you want," Tess dismisses.
Elijah looks at Noel and Catherine in disbelief. They both shrug. It's an open secret in the company that no one sticks solely to their own message boards, so it's Elijah's own fault for being a goody-two-shoes.
"So what?" Catherine puts in. "Does everyone think he was possessed or something? Corruption derangement?"
"No one knows for sure, obviously," Tess answers. "It's not like they can just ask him. 'Hey, why aren't you being an asshole like usual?' But the A-class espers are speculating that his corruption must actually be down."
"I mean," Elijah starts, scratching his head, "I know he has guiding problems, but he can't be that close to a meltdown all the time, can he?"
Noel almost snorts.
"Apparently, he is," Tess says. "That's why everyone puts up with his shitty attitude. Plus the fact that he's the most powerful person in the country, but even then. Everyone knows he's constantly on edge. But now that he's being less mean, people think he must have reduced his corruption, probably—by a third at least!"
"So he got guided," Noel says quickly. "Like every esper on the planet. Good for him. Break's almost over, so I'm gonna—"
Tess grabs his sleeve as he starts to stand, yanking him back down in his chair. "We've got five more minutes and I'm not done," she insists. "It's not as simple as getting guided or not," she continues without releasing him. "Word is that none of his usual guides have done a session with him in over three weeks!"
Noel bites back a sigh. That idiot. Of course people will get suspicious if he starts getting better after canceling all his guidance appointments. But then again, Noel can't deride him too much. If normal guiding hurts him, Noel can understand why Jade would want to stay away after experiencing guiding that didn't. Who would torture themselves on purpose? Except Noel, apparently.
"I thought he didn't sync with any guides?" Elijah brings up. "But he was still doing sessions?"
"No choice, right?" Catherine chimes in. "A low sync rate is better than nothing, especially when you're always on the verge of a meltdown."
"Exactly," Tess agrees. "And there were a few A-class guides that he would cycle through when necessary, from what I've heard. Their rates were bad, but the best rate he's ever had with someone is 29%, so it's probably all the same to him."
A residual jolt of sympathy strums through Noel. 29% is abysmally low. Most Paradigm medical specialists recommend against even trying to guide someone with less than a 40% rate, otherwise you risk damaging both of your cores. But in Jade's case, he really had no choice.
"So his corruption is possibly down, but he hasn't been getting guidance from anyone at Halo," Catherine summarizes dryly. "Do you think he found that guide he was looking for last month? The one who disappeared at the Fray site?"
"People have a lot of theories," Tess says, waving a hand. "That's one. Another is that he's going to a different company. Rae Cassidy is on leave from his agency, and I saw some rumors that it's because he flew over here to guide Jade. Some are even suggesting it was spontaneous reduction, but no one even knows for sure if his corruption is down because he does all his testing in private."
"Spontaneous reduction is just a myth anyway," Catherine dismisses. "And didn't Cassidy take leave because he's shooting a new movie?"
"Plus Ransom tested with Cassidy years ago," Noel adds reluctantly. With only a few known S-class guides in the country, of course one of the most powerful and least stable espers of all time has tested with all of them.
"Shouldn't we just be grateful?" Elijah asks. "No matter how it happened, if Ransom's corruption is down, then the city won't be in constant danger of annihilation."
"Yeah, I guess," Tess whines. "But it's so weird! Who's guiding him?! No one knows anything!"
"He's probably keeping it to himself on purpose," Noel mutters.
"Noel!" Tess exclaims. "Your brother is Ransom's best friend, right? Can't you ask him to find out what's going on?"
A pitchy laugh falls from Noel's mouth. "I don't really think Beckett would talk to me about that kind of thing."
"Don't be too nosy, Tess," Catherine chides. "Getting involved with the upper class suites is nothing but a headache. They're living in a completely different world, and that way lies madness. Trust me."
"Anyway," Elijah changes the subject with a cheerful smile. "Who's excited for the party?"
Tess groans in despair and flops onto the tabletop again.