With regret, Leo had to scrap the previous idea for… obvious reasons.
He turned to Rachel.
"I'm not too familiar with the local places. Are you okay with picking?"
She smiled and nodded.
"Of course. I know just the place."
The two walked for quite some time.
The sun shone on them, keeping them warm from the gusts of wind coming from the North.
It had been quite some time since the skies were this clear.
The constant rain had some people concerned.
Anything out of the ordinary always did.
Rumors of some sort of cloud-based Cryptid spread.
Children whispering from one to another that the walls would keep the water in, eventually drowning them all.
Of course, these children didn't know of the spill gates and several diversion systems.
As Leo followed Rachel down the streets, he heard voices from the other side of the street.
A group of civilians murmuring to themselves.
"Wait… is that him?"
"Who?"
"You really don't know? The Scorched Reaper?"
Leo's eyes turned to them, causing them to avert their own.
He turned back, walking faster to catch up with Rachel.
She looked at him for some moments as a mischievous smirk grew.
"What's it like being a celebrity, Mr. Scorched Reaper?"
Leo let out a large sigh in exasperation.
"A little theatrical for me."
Rachel covered her mouth as she chuckled.
Some time later she had stopped walking, turning to him and nudging him towards a pleasant, polished café.
Bells rang above the door as they entered.
Leo looked around for a moment, scanning the inside.
It was much more spacious and clearly better funded than Charlotte's workplace.
He followed Rachel, sitting across from her.
It was difficult to ease up in such a populated establishment, but not wanting to waste the woman's time, he brushed this feeling to the side.
Rachel looked up and down the menu.
"What do you think you'll order?"
He looked down at his own menu, failing to find anything appetizing.
For whatever strange reason he felt a sense of loyalty to the old coffee maker at his apartment.
It wasn't much, but it got the job done.
How could he disrespect that thing after everything they'd been through?
"I don't think I'll order."
She looked up at him for a moment, before blinking down towards her menu once more.
Leo remained silent as Rachel ordered, the young waitress clearly having a hard time keeping her eyes off of him.
Finally sipping on her coffee, she let out a sigh of relief.
"I really needed this."
He hummed in acknowledgment.
It had fallen silent for quite some time, causing Leo's mind to spiral a bit.
` A bit quiet for "catching up". I mean, what am I even supposed to say here? Yeah, I'm back to the only thing I was ever good at. What's that? Oh, nothing much. Just killing. Yep. Real heartwarming reunion talk. `
Her mouth opened for a moment before closing, as if she failed to get something out.
He halted his thoughts, shifting his focus towards her.
After a moment, she continued.
"I've been meaning to ask you something, Leo."
` She's probably going to ask about what happened at the academy. Is she still upset? She has every right to be. Wait, is this her confronting me? Am I getting arrested? I guess I deserve it. Wait, I don't want to go to prison. Could I run? Maybe head to Ironclaw, lay low, pretend I don't have Somnia. Become a teacher again or something. …What am I thinking? I don't even know what she's going to say. `
She began to look concerned as his silence lingered.
"Leo…?"
He snapped out of his thought, looking up towards her.
"Oh, sorry. What were you going to ask?"
"I wanted to know… why exactly can't you love?"
He blinked a few times.
"What?"
She huffed, swallowing a lump in her throat before persisting.
"You told me you were incapable of love. Why do you think that? I know of your loss, but… I lost my partner, too."
Leo's eyes widened.
He found it particularly hard to speak at that moment, the new information forming a clog in his throat.
After a moment, he was finally able to speak.
"What happened?"
Perhaps it wasn't the best thing to say immediately after finding out, but he had spat out the question before he even realized.
She awkwardly fiddled with her fingers around her half-empty cup.
"Nine years ago. He was one of the casualties of a Cryptid break-in."
A memory almost immediately resurfaced from the mention of such an event.
He remembered a particularly disastrous break-in that occurred nine years ago.
The Rhan-rank Cherufe.
He could still vividly remember the screams and cries for help that day. He had killed it alongside Caspian, but far too late.
The damage had already been done.
He clenched his fist, subconsciously.
` If I had just been faster… `
Before his thoughts could get worse, a soft hand was placed over his.
He looked back up to Rachel, being met with kind eyes.
"I saw you that day. Don't think for a second that it was your fault. You did what you could when you got there."
His gaze dropped once more as he reluctantly accepted this.
"I… I understand."
An awkward silence later, she continued.
"Back to my question, though. Why can't you love?"
He thought for a while, carefully weighing how he should respond.
Most answers he thought of would come off as lousy excuses to be avoidant to affection.
He respected her and knew she deserved a real answer.
But… there was no easy way to say this to anyone.
With a sigh, he collected his thoughts and began to explain himself.
"When Charlotte died… I saw no use for love. All it did was remind me of what I had lost. The one person I could give it to, now gone. With nowhere to go, it festered inside. So, I grew to hate the sensation."
She lowered her cup from her mouth, gently setting it before her.
Her face contorted with emotion; her brows knitting together, lips parting as her eyes began to glisten with tears.
Having waited a moment to ensure she was still with him, he continued.
"As you may know, one's Eidcore is deeply intertwined with their soul. After a certain point of Somnia mastery, you can sacrifice fragments of your soul to your Eidcore for power. Fragments such as… love."
Her breath caught for a moment. She began to shake her head slowly, as if trying to reject the words.
He looked down, unable to hold her gaze.
"I don't run from love.
I can't
It's not there anymore.
Nothing is."
The sounds of sniffling brought his eyes back up.
She held a handkerchief to her face as she cleaned herself up.
"I'm sorry, Leo. I should've just respected what you had first said. Instead, I pried and now… I've made quite the fool of myself."
He swallowed nervously, stammering to comfort her, although he had no idea how to.
"I… I don't know the specifics of it."
She looked back up at him.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, I'm not certain of how it works. I could… I could change. With time, of course. Perhaps lots of it. But I believe it's possible."
His mouth moved on its own, separate from his thoughts.
` What? Why? Why am I saying this to her? This isn't true. I have to stop this. She has to know the truth. But, if she did know… She'd have no reason to ever talk to me again. `
Before he could correct himself, she smiled.
The sight of her makeup running over a hopeful smile twisted his chest in such a painful, raw way.
He couldn't speak. Even though he wanted to, he couldn't.
She dabbed her face with the handkerchief once more as she regained her composure.
"It's getting late. I think I'll go on ahead. Thank you for giving me your time, Leo."
He felt his breathing grow heavier as he repressed the truth.
He had lied to her.
Not just any fib, but one of the worst lies you could ever tell someone.
Especially someone as kind-hearted as her.
"I… Yes. It was nice seeing you."
Some time later he was left alone in the café.
` Why…? Why did I do that? `