The ceiling fan spun slowly overhead.
Ren lay on his bed, eyes open.
Sleep had taken him at some point—he wasn't sure when. After facing each girl's gaze, after watching Emi disappear into the crowd… his heart had collapsed in on itself.
He'd meant well.
But he still hurt them.
That thought chased him all the way into unconsciousness.
Then the world exploded in cleavage.
Ren blinked.
"Not again."
The sky was pink. The trees were thigh-shaped. The grass jiggled.
Yes, literally. Jiggle physics. On grass.
He looked down.
He was once again wearing an unbuttoned red uniform and black slacks with absurdly polished shoes. Everything felt… DxD-level dumb.
A voice called from above.
"Yo! Took you long enough, kouhai!"
And there he was.
Standing on a golden throne, shirt half-open, devil wings glowing red—Issei Hyoudou, Oppai King of the Dream Dimension.
"NOPE," Ren shouted. "I'm leaving. Not again."
A red aura slammed the ground beside him.
"Sit your virgin butt down!" Issei barked. "You failed the Harem Test, round two!"
Ren groaned. "I didn't fail—I was being respectful!"
Issei landed beside him with dramatic flare. "You denied a public kiss. In a maid café. At peak plot tension. That's textbook harem cowardice!"
Ren threw his hands up. "What was I supposed to do?! I kissed Emi before! The others didn't even get their—!"
"Exactly." Issei pointed a glowing red finger at his chest. "You advanced one route without leveling the others. It's emotional EXP imbalance!"
Ren blinked. "...You're explaining relationships like an RPG."
"Because it IS an RPG!" Issei shouted. "With boobs! You built affection stats across five heroines, and now the boss fight is your own indecision."
Ren collapsed to his knees. "Why is this my life?"
Issei offered a hand, unusually calm now.
"Listen, kouhai. I get it. Harem isn't easy. It's messy. You don't just collect hearts. You carry them. You protect them. And sometimes... you hurt them without trying."
Ren looked up.
"Then what should I do?"
Issei's smile softened.
"You stop thinking of yourself as the center of the harem."
Ren frowned. "Huh?"
"You're not the sun they orbit. You're the ground they stand on. Give them that ground. Make it steady. Don't choose right away—just be real. Let them choose whether they want to stand by your side when the dust clears."
Silence.
The dreamscape shimmered around them.
Ren slowly stood.
And smiled. "...You're surprisingly wise for someone whose catchphrase is 'Oppai saves the world.'"
Issei beamed. "Wisdom and boobs can coexist."
A portal opened behind them—one shaped like a heart. Of course.
"Time to wake up," Issei said, pushing him gently. "Go make things right. One awkward, blushing moment at a time."
Ren turned.
Then paused.
"Wait—can I at least summon you once in real life?"
Issei grinned.
"Only if there's oppai involved."
Ren shot awake, drenched in sweat.
The morning sun streamed through the curtains.
His chest felt lighter. His heart calmer. His brain… still full of chaos, but focused.
He wasn't going to make a grand confession.
He wasn't going to run, either.
Today, he would start fixing what he'd cracked.
Step by step.
Heartbeat by heartbeat.