She smiled sadly, looking around at the winter evening, and rubbed her nose to bring some warmth back to her freezing skin. "I know you don't want to hear these words, but I just have to get them off my chest. And I genuinely want to congratulate you on your milestone. I'm really proud and really happy for you and your achievements. I know the words coming from me might sound insincere, but I wanted you to know anyway."
Victoria felt the burning sensation of tears forming behind her eyes and steeled herself against them. She refused to appear vulnerable again, refused to let herself cry in front of him. She had promised herself that much dignity, at least.
"Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that if my absence helps to heal the wounds I inflicted and brings you the peace my presence never could, then I hope you embrace it. And I hope I find my own peace too."
Victoria stepped in closer, close enough that she could see the golden flecks in his dark eyes, close enough to smell the familiar scent of his cologne that had once been as comforting as home.
"During this phase, I've really learned a lot, and I have you to thank for that." She shrugged her shoulders, trying for casualness but failing miserably. "I don't know what destiny has planned for us, but I know one thing I can't unlove you. You will always have my heart."
She then reached out and patted him on his shoulder, the gesture achingly familiar yet somehow foreign now, like they were old friends who had grown apart over the years instead of lovers who had once shared everything.
"I truly wish for your happiness, James. Wherever it is and whoever it lies with."
Victoria nodded her head as she memorized his face one last time, drinking in every detail like a woman about to be exiled from paradise. The way his eyebrows drew together slightly when he was thinking. The set of his beautiful jawline. The way his lips pressed together when he was trying not to say something he might regret.
"Goodbye."
The word fell between them like a stone dropped into still water, creating ripples that would spread long after the sound had faded.
Victoria turned and walked away, each step requiring more willpower than she had known she possessed. She felt James's stare burning into her back, could sense him watching her retreat, but she did not look back. It was the hardest walk of her life, harder than walking away from her parents' house when she'd started her company, harder than walking out of the hospital after her breakdown.
Her face scrunched up as she fought back the tears that threatened to fall, her jaw clenched so tightly it ached. By the time she reached the entrance where the valet was waiting, she had managed to compose herself enough to appear professional, though her hands shook slightly as she handed over her ticket.
Soon Davidson arrived with her car, and Victoria entered the back seat, immediately rolling up the dividers to give herself privacy. The moment she was alone, her carefully constructed composure began to crack.
"This is for the best. You handled it so well," she whispered to herself like some sort of encouragement, but deep down she knew she hadn't handled anything well at all.
She hadn't expected those words to come out of her mouth. The truth was that she had wanted to still beg, to throw herself at his feet and promise him anything if he would just give her one more chance. She had wanted to wrap her arms around him and hold on until he remembered what they had once meant to each other.
But when his shoulder had brushed past hers outside the venue, when he had looked right through her like she was invisible, she had known then that she was grasping at straws. The words had tumbled out without filter after that realization hit. She couldn't stop talking, couldn't stop the flood of everything she had been holding back for months.
By the time she arrived at her penthouse, it was nearly nine in the evening. Victoria got out of the car and stumbled into her apartment like a woman in a daze. She barely made it to her bedroom before her legs gave out entirely.
JJ, her white munchkin kitten, immediately sensed her distress and snuggled into her lap, licking at her fallen tears and meowing in sympathy as he sensed the pain his owner was going through. The small creature's warmth was the only comfort in a world that had suddenly gone cold and empty.
Victoria knew she was crying from how blurry her sight had become. She was falling apart, going insane with grief and loss and the terrible finality of what she had just done.
"I let James go. I can't believe I let him go," she whispered to JJ, her voice breaking on every word.
That hadn't been the plan when she walked outside. She had fully intended to fight for him one more time, to find some way to break through his defenses and remind him of what they had shared. But it had just happened, the words pouring out of her like blood from a wound she couldn't stanch.
Shattered and completely alone except for her kitten, Victoria cried into JJ's soft fur. She bled in silence for what she had given up on, for the love she had finally found the strength to release.
But it had to be done. Fighting this single battle was only causing more harm to both of them. He didn't want her anymore, and for the sake of his sanity and hers, it was better to give up the fight that was destroying them both.
She wasn't herself anymore. Victoria had lost her spark, her fire, her confidence, and was wearing a fake façade that lied better than any mask ever could. This hollow, broken woman was nothing like the confident self she had once been. She too needed to move on and accept that they could never be what they once were.
That night, Victoria cried for what she promised herself would be the last time, shedding everything off and resolving to start anew. Tomorrow, she would begin the impossible task of learning how to live without the other half of her soul.