Uranus—that is, the planet Uranus.
The word itself wasn't problematic.
Coincidentally, "Uranus" happened to be pronounced the same as "Your anus."
So Ron's sentence "Can I have a look at Uranus" could also be understood as "Can I have a look at your anus?"
Ron saying this to Lavender Brown, a girl, no wonder Seamus thought he was making crude jokes.
At this moment, hearing his good friend Harry bring this matter up directly, even the obtuse Ron felt a bit embarrassed.
"Heh heh, just joking, just joking..."
Just then, Hermione caught up with them from behind, saying cheerfully:
"Divination class assigned a heap of homework?
Ha—Professor Viktor didn't assign any homework at all!"
Seeing Hermione arrive, Harry naturally didn't feel comfortable continuing to discuss the "Uranus" issue in front of her.
Ron was also quite relieved that Harry had finally let him off the hook, so he simply went along with Hermione's comment:
"Yeah, Professor Viktor is really great."
Harry glanced at Ron and said nothing more.
As time passed, the boys and girls had all reached the age when romantic feelings awakened.
In this regard, the magical world was certainly no different from the Muggle world.
However, even Ron hadn't realized one thing.
Judging from Lavender Brown's reaction just now, even when Ron made crude jokes, she hadn't objected strongly.
Ron probably hadn't realized what this indicated yet.
And as for himself...
Harry couldn't help but sigh. I really am an innocent young man.
However, Ron's relief didn't last long.
When they were eating dinner, Dean came over with a copy of the Daily Prophet.
"Hey, Ron, your dad's in the paper."
"What? Let me see!"
Ron immediately grabbed the newspaper upon hearing this.
However, just seeing the headline made his face darken immediately.
MINISTRY OF MAGIC BUNGLE AGAIN
Just from this headline, Ron could already sense that the following content probably wouldn't be anything good.
Sure enough, in the subsequent content, Rita Skeeter, that female reporter, used highly biased descriptions to thoroughly discredit Mr. Weasley.
Simply put, she named names regarding that incident at the Quidditch World Cup that hadn't previously named anyone.
She explicitly pointed out that the "certain official" at the Ministry after the Quidditch World Cup was none other than Arnold Weasley of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office.
She hadn't even gotten Mr. Weasley's name right.
It looked like she had confused him with Arnold Peasegood.
Not only that, she also mentioned another matter.
That Mr. Weasley had gotten into an altercation with several Muggles over a large batch of highly aggressive garbage bins.
Furthermore, she also took the opportunity to criticize the retired Auror Alastor Moody, who had appeared at Pettigrew's public trial.
She said that since retiring, this Auror could no longer distinguish between an ordinary handshake and attempted murder.
As for Mr. Weasley, he had received an alarm from Moody's residence, and upon arriving found it was a false alarm.
But having gotten that far, he had no choice but to use magic to modify the memories of several Muggle police officers to prevent the situation from escalating.
This matter could at most be considered Mad-Eye Moody overreacting, and had nothing to do with Mr. Weasley.
But the most critical sentence was:
"When a Daily Prophet reporter asked him why he had involved the Ministry in this pointless and potentially troublesome incident, Weasley refused to comment."
This Daily Prophet reporter was undoubtedly Rita Skeeter.
Additionally, she had included a photograph.
It showed Mr. and Mrs. Weasley standing side by side at their front door—who knew under what circumstances she had taken it.
"She even got my dad's name wrong!"
Ron said angrily:
"After the Quidditch World Cup, the Ministry forbade everyone from answering questions without authorization.
This damn woman definitely knows that. She must have done it on purpose!"
"Don't be angry, Ron."
Harry patted Ron's back, consoling him. "Everyone knows that woman is crazy."
"Not everyone knows."
Sherlock said coolly. "In fact, this report will cause a large portion of people to form preconceived notions."
Harry and Hermione looked at Sherlock somewhat helplessly.
Although both were long familiar with Sherlock's manner, they still felt helpless whenever he said such inopportune things.
It seemed Sherlock's habit couldn't be changed.
Harry sighed, and Hermione shook her head, then began serving beef stew into Sherlock and Harry's bowls.
"What about me?"
Ron's eyes widened. Why was he the only one left out?
"I thought you'd lost your appetite!"
"How dare you!" Ron said angrily. "Hermione, you're even worse than Sherlock!"
"Thanks for the compliment."
Hermione said calmly, then began wolfing down her food like she had at lunch.
"You're not going to the library again tonight, are you?"
Harry asked somewhat worriedly, watching her like this.
"Of course I am," Hermione said unclearly with her mouth full. "There's still a mountain of work to do."
Ron also began eating heartily now, channeling his indignation into appetite. Hearing Hermione say this, he couldn't help but pause:
"But you told us that Professor Viktor—"
"It's not schoolwork."
Just like at lunch, Hermione said goodbye to the three of them after finishing everything on her plate and hurried off.
"Is she still researching house-elf information?"
Watching Hermione's hurried departure, Harry and Ron looked at each other, unable to help asking.
"Elementary, my friend."
Sherlock said with a slight smile. "Just as I said at lunch, when she stops running to the library, she'll be able to tell us about the history of house-elves."
"I'd rather not hear about such things."
Ron shook his head and returned to battling the beef on his plate.
The next two days passed uneventfully, with everyone attending classes as usual.
Hermione still ran to the library whenever she had free time.
She had taken Sherlock's words to heart and no longer went on hunger strikes, instead changing her approach to fighting for house-elf rights.
There was also one noteworthy matter concerning the Slytherin House professor and Potions teacher, Professor Snape.
Who knew what had provoked him, but his vindictiveness seemed to have reached new heights after this summer.
Of course, it was also because someone had given him ample reason.
Neville Longbottom, this forgetful young wizard who was most afraid of Snape, had once again melted his cauldron in Potions class.
This was the sixth cauldron he had melted.
Professor Snape unceremoniously served Neville the "house points deduction plus detention" combo, making him disembowel a large barrel of horned toads.
When Neville dragged his heavy footsteps back, he looked like he had just been pulled from a mud pit.
His uniform was covered in dark brown slime, his cuffs still hung with several toad hairs, his fingers were stiffly curled with indelible dark green viscera residue wedged under his nails.
His lips were pale, his eyes reddened, even his breathing came in tremors, his nerves nearly at the breaking point.
When he saw Sherlock at the corner of the corridor, he grabbed onto him like a lifeline and cried out:
"Save me, Sherlock!"
He almost instinctively began seeking help from his fencing instructor.
"This situation calls for the Scouring Charm," Sherlock's gaze swept over Neville, looking directly at Hermione.
"Leave it to me!"
Hermione nodded and quickly walked over.
She pulled out her wand from her pocket, gently tapped Neville's hand, and patiently said:
"First concentrate, imagine the dirt in your nail beds being washed away by water, then repeat after me 'Scourgify'!
Pay attention to clear pronunciation, and point your wand tip at the location of the stain."
She explained while demonstrating in slow motion so Neville could see every detail, helping him remove the nauseating toad viscera from under his nails.
"Heh, we all know why Snape's temper is so foul." Ron said with a cold laugh watching this scene.
Harry sighed: "He's always liked targeting Gryffindor students."
Could only say that Neville had taken the bullet for him.
If not for Neville, the one losing points this class would definitely have been himself.
"Not only that, but also because Professor Lupin kept his position as Defense Against the Dark Arts professor."
Ron added.
Everyone at Hogwarts knew that Professor Snape had always particularly wanted to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts.
Because of this, he harbored dissatisfaction toward all Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers and didn't hide this emotion from his face.
Especially Professor Lupin.
Because he was far too popular with the students.
What made Snape even more unable to accept was that such a popular teacher was also his former enemy.
"Sherlock, Snape wouldn't deliberately leak Professor Lupin's identity, would he?"
Hearing Ron say this, Harry asked somewhat worriedly.
This suspicion wasn't exactly groundless—after all, last term when Professor Lupin took leave, Snape had consciously guided everyone to think in that direction.
Although ultimately only Sherlock and Hermione understood Snape's true intent, it was enough to demonstrate his resentment.
"He won't," Sherlock shook his head. "After Pettigrew was exposed, he gave up that plan."
"But... Professor Lupin got to continue this year," Harry was still somewhat worried. "What if..."
"There's no 'what if.'"
Sherlock said with certainty. "He won't do that—however, if Professor Lupin exposes himself, he'd certainly be happy to see it happen."
"What are you talking about?"
Hermione walked over at this moment. Seeing them discussing so enthusiastically, she couldn't help asking.
"Talking about Professor Lupin," Harry looked at Neville beside them, who had let out a long breath. "All sorted?"
"All sorted. Let's talk as we walk."
On the way to Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Harry also shared his concerns with Hermione.
"If Sherlock says Snape won't tell, then he definitely won't."
Hermione said with certainty. She had an almost blind trust in Sherlock's judgment.
However, she then frowned. "But if things continue like this—taking leave every full moon and having Professor Snape substitute, he'll be discovered sooner or later..."
Ron laughed. "Don't worry, it's been a whole summer. Dumbledore must have a solution."
"Let's hope so."
Hermione said this with her mouth, but her heart didn't dare agree.
Admittedly, Dumbledore was recognized as the greatest wizard of the age.
But just from their few years at school, this old man had clearly been holding Sherlock back...
Thinking this, Hermione quickly put away this somewhat disrespectful thought.
Sherlock was indeed very capable!
But she couldn't belittle Dumbledore because of this.
Perhaps Dumbledore really did have some deeper purpose.
When the young lions arrived at the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, Professor Lupin hadn't arrived yet.
Everyone was long accustomed to Professor Lupin's tardiness, so they weren't surprised, in fact, they were rather excited.
Finally, finally, finally!
The Defense Against the Dark Arts professor wasn't changing every year anymore!
And the one who stayed was the best teacher they'd ever had!
What incredible luck!
When Professor Remus Lupin walked into the classroom, he was unsurprisingly greeted by warm applause.
Professor Lupin stopped, gently pressing both hands on the podium, his gaze slowly sweeping across each excited face.
His eyes were slightly moist, warm smile lines around his eyes, even his usually pale cheeks flushed with a faint blush.
He cleared his throat, his voice softer than usual.
"First of all, I'm honored to continue teaching you all Defense Against the Dark Arts."
Professor Lupin remained as gentle as before, and compared to last year, he looked much healthier.
His previously somewhat tired eyes now sparkled brightly.
Not only that, everyone also noticed he was wearing new robes.
"Looks like Hogwarts is paying him a decent salary."
Ron leaned toward Sherlock and Harry, beginning to whisper.
Sherlock nodded slightly.
This time Ron had actually guessed correctly.
Because of his identity issues, Professor Lupin hadn't been able to find normal work all these years.
He could only take temporary jobs that were severely inconsistent with his abilities and paid extremely poorly.
But all this changed after coming to Hogwarts last year.
On one hand, Dumbledore was generous enough, offering adequate compensation—in fact, Lupin's contributions were indeed worthy of this salary.
On the other hand, it was because of Severus Snape.
This Potions master could provide him with unlimited Wolfsbane Potion for free, which saved Lupin his biggest expense—truly double the joy.
Add to that Hogwarts providing room and board, and this way, Professor Lupin could finally save money.
Under these circumstances, he could finally afford to get himself some proper attire.
"Last school year, we learned how to deal with Boggarts, Red Caps, Hinkypunks, Grindylows, Kappas..."
Professor Lupin's gaze swept across the entire class, maintaining a faint smile throughout,
"This way, we've finally caught up on our progress."
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