The firelight cast long shadows across the stone floor, flickering like memories I couldn't outrun. I stood alone in the war room, the echoes of the hunt still clinging to my skin. My tunic was torn, boots caked with mud, blood drying at the edge of one sleeve. It wasn't mine. That somehow made it worse.
They hadn't called it an ambush. Not officially. No, the court would call it an unfortunate escalation. A rare incident. A tragedy no one could have predicted.
But I knew better.
I stared at the crude hunting maps still spread across the long table, marked with neat ink lines and coded glyphs. The same ones Jesse's guards had sworn were delivered by a royal messenger. A lie. One more thread in the tangled noose.
A soft knock tapped at the edge of the chamber. I didn't turn.
"You should rest," Julius said behind me.
His voice had the kind of smoothness that always unsettled me, too precise to be real comfort. Yet tonight… it didn't grate the way it used to.
I straightened. "Is that an order?"
"No. Just me worrying about you."
I finally faced him. He looked cleaner than I expected, the ceremonial black of his uniform still sharp, though the faint smear at his jaw told me he hadn't come straight from a bath. He hadn't slept either.
He crossed the room slowly, hands behind his back, eyes never leaving mine. "I knew my father was looking for a reason to turn on Valin. And I knew Jesse would do anything to stop it."
I flinched at his name. Julius saw it. His expression didn't change.
"I didn't want to believe he was part of it," I murmured.
"He didn't start the fire," Julius said quietly. "But he didn't stop it either."
I shook my head, staring down at the maps again. "He said he was trying to limit the damage. To contain it."
"And maybe he was," Julius said. "But power doesn't get contained. It consumes."
He walked past me and lit a tall brass lantern by the wall. The flame flared, then settled into a steady glow.
"You've changed," he said.
I frowned.
"Three days ago, you would've defended him even now. Made excuses. Clung to hope."
"That girl died in the forest," I said. My voice was steady but quiet. "Along with the others."
Julius nodded once. "Then perhaps you're ready."
"Ready for what?"
He turned to face me fully. "To stop surviving and start shaping. To take a seat at the table instead of standing guard outside the door."
A strange tightness bloomed in my chest. "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying I want you with me. Not as a soldier. Not as a shield Jesse leans on when he needs something done. I'm offering you a position that means something."
I laughed once, bitterly. "You're offering me power."
"I'm offering you truth," he corrected. "And the means to do something with it."
"You think I trust you?" I asked.
"No. But trust isn't required. Just clarity."
I looked away, jaw tense. The memories of the hunt came flooding back again. The blood. The roars. The whispers in the trees. I could still feel Jesse's grip on my wrist. The way it had tightened when I said, You knew.
Julius moved closer. Not too close. Just near enough that I had to meet his eyes.
"Do you know what Jesse sacrificed tonight?" he asked. "It wasn't just lives. It was you."
My stomach knotted.
"He believed he could make you forgive anything. That your loyalty was guaranteed. So he let it happen. Trusted you'd understand in the end."
He reached into the inner pocket of his coat and pulled something out.
The pendant.
I stared at it.
"It was found at the edge of the camp," Julius said. "Your report mentioned it. A royal messenger's insignia."
I took it from him, the metal cold in my hand.
"You were right," he said. "About all of it. The maps. The creature. The cover-up."
"I'm tired," I whispered.
"Then rest," Julius said. "But don't mistake exhaustion for surrender."
He started to turn away, but I stopped him. "Why are you really doing this?"
He looked over his shoulder. "Because I've watched you fight every battle like it belonged to someone else. Jesse's cause. The crown's orders. The people's expectations."
"And you want it to be your cause now?"
He smiled faintly. "I want it to be yours."
The door closed behind him with a soft click.
I stood alone again. But it didn't feel the same.
I didn't sleep that night. I didn't try. Instead, I walked the outer corridors of the palace compound, past sleeping guards and flickering torches. Past the great hall with its crumbling tapestries. Past the garden where Jesse once said I smelled like wild mint after rain.
I didn't cry.
I didn't rage.
I just kept walking.
By the time the sun cracked over the mountains, painting the sky in pale streaks of gold, I knew what I would do.
The chamber Julius used was smaller than Jesse's. Tighter. Built like a strategy den, not a royal suite. Scrolls lined the walls, maps overlapped on the desk, and a small collection of bone-daggers lay on display behind glass. None ceremonial. All used.
He looked up when I entered.
"I've made my decision," I said.
He didn't move. "And?"
"I'll take the position. But I want full access. No curated reports. No chain of command designed to keep me clean. If I'm going to be involved, then I'm going to be involved."
A pause. Then, a slow nod.
"Done."
"And one more thing," I said. "Don't lie to me. I'll still leave Jesse to his lies. But not you. If we're going to do this, I want to know when you play a game, even if it costs me."
Julius smiled faintly. Not kind. Not cruel. Just the shadow of something that might have been pride.
"Welcome to the war," he said.
They announced my new role at midday. Not in a grand assembly, but in a closed council meeting between Julius, the Queen's envoy, and several high-ranking commanders. The position didn't have a title yet. That was intentional. But it gave me access to sensitive intelligence, special oversight over field operations, and more importantly—freedom to move outside Jesse's jurisdiction.
He hadn't been in the room. I hadn't seen him since the forest.
But I knew it would reach him.
And it did.
That night, just as the palace quieted and the halls emptied, I found him waiting near the North Tower. He didn't speak. Just stood in shadow, arms folded, watching me like I was some shifting mirage he couldn't figure out how to hold onto.
"You knew," I said.
His jaw clenched. "I did."
"Then you also knew I'd walk away."
A pause.
"I hoped you wouldn't."
I looked at him. Really looked.
Not the boy who'd trained beside me. Not the prince who'd once pulled me from a collapsing ridge during a rogue ambush. Not even the man who kissed me like I was the last thing left in a burning world.
Just Jesse. Regal. Caged.
"You left me with no choice," I said.
He stepped forward. "I'll fix this."
"No, Jesse," I said quietly. "You'll try. But I don't think I'll be standing beside you when you do."
Then I left him there.
And this time, he didn't follow.