『Cold』
『It's so cold..』
『I feel so alone』
I hug my legs, trembling, as I feel my own body slowly drift away..
Wait..
Drift away?
Why am I drifting away?
How do I even know?
I open my eyes—pitch black.
I can't tell if they're open or closed.
All I see.. is nothing.
Just nothing..
And still, I drift. And drift. And drift.
I don't know what time it is.
Where am I?
What am I?
Who.. was I?
All I know is I keep drifting—drifting somewhere..
Alone with my thoughts.
No voices.
No presence.
No one..
Is this really it?
Is this really what my life was supposed to become?
Just drifting.. in this void?
I don't know..
I'm tired..
I don't want to think anymore..
「Why do you not wanna think anymore?」
???
Eh? What was that… a voice?
That wasn't my subconscious, was it?
It's deeper than mine—kinda got that onee~san vibe.
Still… it's not wrong to maybe reply, right?
「Badummm!」
「Excuse me?」
Ah… it is an entity.
「A-ah, you know when something surprising happens and you go 'badumm!'」
「I'm not understanding you.」
The voice sounds… pissed.
「It's nothing…」
I laughed nervously.
「So, why do you want to not think?」
I tilted my head… though I'm not sure if I actually did.
「Well… because if what's gonna happen now is me just drifting in this void, wouldn't it be better to stop thinking?」
I crossed my arms.
「Ah, that is plausible…」
The voice seemed content with my answer? Judging by how it doesn't sound as serious now.
「So do you wanna stop thinking now?」
Eh?
「Eh?」
「Well, you said you want to stop thinking.」
Well… yeah, but—
「I mean…」
「Hmmm?」
「As it turns out… maybe that's not the right choice.」
I couldn't help but think things through.
Should I really want to stop thinking?
Wouldn't that mean I'd be gone?
There'd be no sense of self?
Scary!
「If… if I was asked, now that I think about it… maybe I'd prefer to reincarnate.」
「To reincarnate, you say?」
The voice's pitch lifted—more cheerful, almost squeaky. Is this really something to get hyped over?
「Well yes, if it's possible.」
「It certainly is. Do you wanna get reincarnated instead?」
Well… yeah, a life in another world is better than whatever this is.
But it's kinda sus how easy-going this voice is…
「Yes, please.」
「Good! You're reincarnating then.」
…Really??
「Just like that?」
「Yup.」
「Is there any catch?」
「You reincarnate as a fly.」
!!!
「A fly?!」
「I'm just joking.」
「That's not funny!」
「Like that 'badumm' earlier.」
「That was different!」
「Nope~ same.」
「Guh…」
「It's nice to tease you」
「Please dont tease mee!」
I regret making fun of this entity earlier.. i thought it was my subconscious.. guh..
「Well, you did ask to be reincarnated, so now you'll get exactly that. Good job~ had you said you wanted to stop thinking, I would've made it easy」
「Aaaahh no more pleasee just reincarnate me」
I pleaded, shaking my hands in front of me, unable to stop the slight blush creeping up my face.
「Pfft.. fine, the world you'll reincarnate to is very harsh, very cruel. But... there are also good things about it..」
Slowly, a light appeared in front of me. The voice kept yapping about the world but it all blurred into incomprehensible word soup.
As the light blinded and enveloped me, its warmth wrapping around my body, I cast one last glance back at the tiny speck that was the void.
「Myrrn.. welcome to Myrrn」