Larry's sudden laughter startled me so much I almost dropped the note pad.
"Good. My. Pride." Larry took the notepad back then turned to leave, his chuckle drawing attention.
I stared after him. Had it all really been a test?
"That was good Max. That was really good." Mai said, her voice trembled a bit, but she was clearly happy.
Pride clapped me on the shoulder. "Damn, that's a strong spine. Nice. How's it feel?"
It took me a moment to register the question… my head felt a light. "Uh… like… I shouldn't be alive after that… or at least missing a few teeth." I admitted as I stared at my still trembling hands.
"It's the adrenalin, maybe you should take a moment. Even we were nervous." Mai comforted using her tail to cover my hands.
"Uh, yeah, a moment…, just… water. I could use a drink." I agreed standing up.
"Message in teams, just in case." Pride reminded, "Also, don't forget to lock your computer."
I wasn't sure if I sat, of fell back because my legs were so shaky. Either way, I turned, messaged in the phone room chat that I needed a quick drink. After locking my computer I was able to stand up.
I heard them before I saw them, I glanced up to see Larry walking behind Erika… talking about me.
I felt like a deer caught in headlights when Erika's eyes narrowed on me.
Larry stood in the doorway behind Erika. Crossing his arms as he smirked. "Weak."
"Hush you! All you need right now is one more RLXdatix." Erika snapped, then turned to me, not any more please from her expression. "Max, my office when you're done."
I felt my heart drop, "Yes ma'am."
"Weak."
"You!" She added turning to face Larry. "Stop all your theatrics! I swear! This isn't the military! Get back to your station, stop goading everyone, and if I so much as think you pull this kind of stunt again, I'll be speaking to Brooks."
I felt the pressure drop. For the first time, Larry looked… angry… I shuddered. A mistake, since half my water went flying. That wasn't the mistake, no, drawing Larry's very displeased attention to myself… that was the mistake. I felt like… a rabbit being eyed by a lion…
"Go! Now!" Erika ordered pointing. Larry turned his gaze to Erika, nodded with a clenched jaw, then left.
I stumbled against the counter. So much for a break to catch my breath…
"Max, take a ten minute break, then come find me." Erika said before leaving just as quickly.
Fuck my life… I cleaned up the water, counted every second of my ten minute, then trudged off to find Erika.
Erika was in the middle of a call, she motioned me to sit down. Great, now I could sit while I waited to have my head ripped off. I tried to distract myself. Picking at my pants, checking under my nails, realizing one of my shoes was wet. I moved my toes… wet socks… great.
"Max?"
I snapped back to attention, "Yes Ma'am?" I asked reflexively.
Erika sighed, then moved her chair so she could sit without the screens between us. "Tell me what happened, from the beginning."
I gripped my sleeve, "I uh, well…" I didn't even know where to start. Asking Larry for bike advice? When he asked me to put the note in yesterday? Or just today?
"I heard he took you to look at bikes, just tell me what happened starting yesterday." Erika prompted.
"Deep breath Max. Just state the facts." Pride offered gently.
I took a deep breath, then gave a brief run down of what happened yesterday, and today. Erika didn't give anything away.
"I see, did at any point Larry threaten you?" Was Erika's first question.
I blinked, threaten? I mean, his presence was intimidating to say the least… but, "No ma'am, I just…"
"Did you ever fear for your safety?" Erika asked calmly.
I swallowed… I didn't think he'd actually hurt me… I was just… my thoughts were kind of wild… "No Ma'am…"
"Why didn't you bring yesterday's issue to my attention? Were you aware you are supposed to leave such messages to the medical staff?" Erika asked her voice hardening just enough to be heard.
I flinched. Unsure what to say… I just… I mean, it wasn't really medical stuff…
"Max, if you had done as Larry asked today, I would have fired you. Immediately."
I stared at her… clenching my jaw.
"Why didn't you immediately seek me out after what Larry did today? Or send me a teams during the situation?" Erika asked narrowing her eyes.
"Max, hold your breath. You can only be honest. Take a moment to compose yourself, then answer." Max reminded.
I felt my expression cracking, I swallowed. Held my breath. "I, just needed a moment to myself after. I fully intended to, to find you after I composed myself. My… adrenaline was still racing… I didn't want to come in here accusing anyone of anything…" I explained, taking moments to hold my breath. It really did help, my heart was calming. My hands were still sweaty, but, I wasn't trembling.
"Why didn't you find me yesterday?"
"I… felt uneasy… but… I wasn't sure." I saw her eyes narrow.
"If you weren't sure, you should have asked. Me, anyone in the phone room. Why didn't you?" Erika persisted.
I closed my eyes, shoulders hunching forward just a bit. "I… I should have… I was… trying to convince myself it wasn't an issue since it was only a note." Honest, I had to be honest.
Erika sighed as she leaned back. "Max, it wasn't your place to be messing in those areas. You're not medical… honestly. I have half a mind to let you go. You say you were going to look for me after, but… I don't know how true that is."
I glanced up at her, water already gathering in my eyes. No… no no no, please… I can't get fired… I'd never been fired before…
"Max, you're a smart kid, you catch on quickly, I thought it would be another week before we put you on calls. But this… was a HIPAA violation. You didn't cave under Larry's intimidation." Erika held up her hand when I opened my mouth. "Just because you're smart, and we are understaffed, doesn't mean I can keep loose cannons around. Larry was a combat medic, he has serious seniority. We also need every medical staff we can get. If Larry hadn't come to me, if anyone else had reported that you almost made a change to someone's prescription? I would be walking you out right now."
I swallowed down my protest…
"Max, messing in someone's medical chart isn't something you do first ask later." Erika stated tapping her nails on her armrest.
The silence was crippling. I forced my eyes wide as I waited.
Erika sighed, "You didn't make the change, by Larry's account you didn't even open the chart. I will be noting in your file that yesterday happened. Let me make this clear Max." Erika waited several heartbeats as I met her gaze.
"You step one more toe out of line before your probation ends, and I will immediately walk you out. Do you understand?" Erika asked staring me down.
"Yes ma'am." My answer was little more than a whisper.
"Good. Return to your desk." Erika dismissed move her chair back behind her screens.
I went back to my desk, trembling. Damn it… damn it! I didn't even put the note it… it hadn't even been three minutes when they found me in the break room… I… damn it!
I stared at the call list… making calls when my voice was cracking… damn it. I need to calm down. I can't afford any more mistakes… I took several deep breaths… then started calling.
I didn't even eat lunch in the break room. I went to the quiet room for the first time. A cot, blanket, lounging chair, small cabinet… I turned the lights off and just closed my eyes.
I kept my head down until I left. Today would be a really good day to have headphones… music… something to shut the world out.