The Grand Celestial Tournament was a spectacle of arrogance. The Golden Dragon Sect's arena loomed like a gilded beast, its walls inlaid with jade and its floors polished to a lethal shine. Sects from across the realm strutted in silken robes, flanked by disciples who looked like they'd never tripped over their own swords. Then there was the Celestial Dawn Sect.
Zhang Wei's group shuffled in, their robes patched with glitter (courtesy of the phoenix's sneezes) and Little Fang's hair still smelling faintly of burnt honey buns. A banner above the arena read, *"Victory Favors the Worthy"*—though the sneers from the crowd suggested the Celestial Dawn Sect was exempt from that promise.
"Welcome, *underdogs*," Grandmaster Xue purred from her elevated throne. "Try not to embarrass yourselves too quickly."
The system chimed. **[Main Quest: Survive the Grand Celestial Tournament.]**
**Objective:** Don't die. Don't get expelled. Don't let the Starfall Sword eat your soul.
**Bonus:** *Humiliate the Golden Dragon Sect. (They deserve it.)*
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**Stage One: The Gauntlet of Elements**
The first trial was a chaotic obstacle course through shifting terrains—blazing infernos, icy chasms, and a swamp that burped toxic fog. Each sect had to send three disciples.
"Mei, Little Fang, Xiao Mao—you're up," Zhang Wei said.
"Why me?!" Little Fang yelped.
"Because you're small and flammable. Perfect for dodging."
Mei strapped explosive talismans to her boots. "Time to make some noise."
The starting gong rang. Mei rocket-jumped over the fire pit, landing in a roll. Little Fang, true to form, tripped into the ice chasm—then accidentally triggered a hidden ladder. "I meant to do that!"
Xiao Mao's raccoon scampered through the toxic swamp, dragging him by the sleeve while he giggled at hallucinating butterflies. When they reached the finish line, the Golden Dragon disciples were still picking swamp mud out of their hair.
"Celestial Dawn qualifies!" the announcer said, sounding personally offended.
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**Stage Two: The Forge of Shadows**
Ling Ling represented the sect in the crafting trial, tasked with forging a weapon from cursed ore. The catch? The ore whispered insults.
*"Your hands shake like a leaf. Your mother was a troll,"* the ore hissed as Ling Ling hammered it.
"Joke's on you—I never knew my mother," she snapped, dunking the blade into phoenix-tear-infused water. The resulting dagger hummed with vengeful energy.
Grandmaster Xue inspected it, her nose wrinkling. "Crude. Unrefined."
The dagger suddenly levitated and stabbed her podium.
"And *spirited*," Ling Ling added sweetly.
---
**Stage Three: The Starfall Sword's Bad Day**
Zhang Wei's trial was solo combat against a spectral warrior. The Starfall Sword buzzed in his grip, eager. *"Let me out. Let me play."*
"Play nice," Zhang Wei muttered.
The warrior attacked, its form blurring. Zhang Wei parried, the sword's starlight slicing through shadows. But with each clash, the blade's whispers grew louder. *"Kill it. Crush it. You're weak."*
The phoenix, barred from the arena, hurled a fireball at Grandmaster Xue's headdress. Distracted, she missed Zhang Wei's sword suddenly glowing crimson. He disarmed the warrior, but not before the blade nicked his arm, leaving a vein of shadow.
"Victory," the announcer grumbled, "somehow."
---
**Stage Four: The Golden Dragon's Trap**
Before the final trial, Elder Zhu "gifted" the sect a celebratory feast. The disciples stared at the spread—roast duck, spirit wine, and a cake shaped like a phoenix (ironic).
"Poisoned?" Little Fang guessed.
"Obviously," Ling Ling said, poking the duck with a dagger. It melted.
Mei sniffed the wine. "Paralysis toxin. Amateur."
They faked unconsciousness, waiting. At midnight, Golden Dragon disciples crept in to "dispose" of them.
"Hello," Zhang Wei said, Starfall Sword at Elder Zhu's throat. "Looking for this?"
A brawl erupted. Little Fang hit someone with a leg of lamb. Xiao Mao's raccoon stole shoes. The phoenix set the cake on fire.
Grandmaster Xue arrived, furious. "Enough! The final trial begins *now*."
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**Final Trial: The Mirror of Eternity**
The last challenge was a duel against one's own reflection. Zhang Wei faced a shadowy twin wielding a corrupted Starfall Sword.
"You're a failure," the twin hissed. "The sect's a joke."
The real Zhang Wei glanced at his disciples—Mei grinning through a black eye, Ling Ling flipping off a Golden Dragon elder, Little Fang feeding the phoenix stolen dumplings.
"Maybe," he said. "But they're *my* joke."
He lunged, not at the twin, but at the mirror itself. The Starfall Sword shattered it, releasing a burst of light.
The crowd gasped. Grandmaster Xue's goblet cracked in her grip.
"Celestial Dawn… wins."
---
**Aftermath: Glory and Gloom**
The sect left with a trophy, a sack of spirit stones, and a lingering shadow in Zhang Wei's veins. The phoenix rode on his shoulder, nibbling his ear as if scolding him.
"I know," he muttered. "The sword's trouble."
The system chimed. **[Quest Complete!]**
**Reward:** *Heaven-Rank Sect Status (Pending Paperwork).*
**Warning:** *Starfall Sword Corruption: 30%. Recommend exorcist. Or a nap.*
As they trudged home, the disciples celebrated.
"We're officially awesome," Mei declared.
"And officially *targets*," Ling Ling added.
Zhang Wei smiled, the sword's whispers dulled by the cacophony of his sect's laughter. For now, that was enough.