After I turned 16 and seriously thought about life ahead, I suddenly realized one day that if I wanted to hold on to her, to be with her forever, it would be incredibly difficult. She was too reserved, and intrinsically proud. She treated me just like a friend, never shy like the little wife in jokes. I tried hard to change that but found there was no way. She never invested emotions in anyone else, treating me as a brother was already quite rare. Her life consisted of her grandmother and reading books, occasionally chatting casually with me.
