Chapter 70: You're Not Meaningless
AN: Before we begin, I want to clarify that this chapter was written with great care. Having personally struggled with similar thoughts and emotions earlier in my life, I found it challenging to write this section. However, I believe it was important to do so because we all need hope and support at some point when we are at our lowest. Without further ado, let's continue with the story.
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Youth suicide remains a pressing public health crisis in Japan, fueled by a complex interplay of factors that profoundly affect the nation's young population. This tragic phenomenon is particularly influenced by overwhelming academic pressures, pervasive social isolation, relentless bullying, and dysfunctional family dynamics.
In recent years, transformative societal changes—such as the rise of internet addiction—alongside the captivating yet sometimes troubling subcultures of anime, manga, and gaming, have significantly reshaped the psychological landscape experienced by Japanese youth.
In the stark reality of these statistics, 513 school-aged children and adolescents tragically lost their lives to suicide, reflecting alarmingly high rates that have persisted over time. Among these heartbreaking cases, high school students comprised the majority, followed closely by their middle and elementary school counterparts.
A multitude of risk factors contribute to this crisis, with intense academic expectations weighing heavily on students, and the insidious effects of bullying leaving deep emotional scars.
These challenges are often exacerbated by cultural stigmas surrounding mental health, which can discourage open discussion and treatment. Furthermore, the allure of subcultures can provide a refuge for some youth, offering a sense of belonging and understanding.
Yet, for others, these same influences can lead to feelings of alienation and confusion, complicating their emotional experiences in ways that are difficult to navigate.
Mitsuko Honda was one of said individuals.
For years, she had felt like an outsider in her own life, the laughter of her classmates a distant echo from which she was forever excluded.
Every morning, she braced herself for the cruel jabs and knowing smirks of her peers. The rumors circulated like wildfire, each one more hurtful than the last. "Look at her," they'd sneer, "no wonder no one wants to be friends with her."
Those words etched themselves deep within her, carving out a loneliness that seemed insurmountable. Words, Mitsuko could deal with. But when the bullying became physical, leaving her bruised and in pain, Mitsuko's strong will began to crack.
Sometimes, in the quiet moments when she was alone with her thoughts, Mitsuko wondered what it would be like to simply disappear.
Would anyone notice?
The deep-seated sadness felt like a dark fog, suffocating and relentless, clouding her view of the future. She found herself staring at the ground, avoiding the glances of the world around her, wishing she could blend into the concrete beneath her sneakers.
Writing and drawing in her journal was her only sanctuary; it held her secrets, her fears, and her dreams of one day becoming a Mangaka, though the dreams felt increasingly out of reach.
She practiced smiling in the mirror, hoping that one day it would feel genuine instead of forced. But every day she wore the mask a little longer, it became heavier, and it weighed her down like an anchor.
A few days ago, Mitsuko's usual tormentors—her school's popular girls—stumbled upon her cherished notebook and took it upon themselves to expose its intimate contents for all to see.
The moment the pages were unveiled, her heart sank, leaving her feeling utterly humiliated and ashamed. As the laughter echoed through the halls, a cacophony of mocking jeers erupted, making her raw emotions the subject of cruel amusement.
From that day forward, Mitsuko made the difficult decision to stop attending school.
The thought of confronting the relentless taunts and scathing comments from her peers loomed over her like a dark cloud, far too daunting to bear.
Instead, she retreated into the confines of her small room, which had become a silent sanctuary, where only her fears accompanied her in the stillness.
Mitsuko's mother, overwhelmed by the demands of her multiple jobs, often worked long hours. She poured herself into her tasks to cope with the immense grief following her husband's recent passing. This left Mitsuko grappling with her growing isolation as she battled the suffocating sadness that threatened to consume her alone and without support. Each day, with the rise and set of the sun, she wrestled with the creeping despair that surrounded her, finding little comfort in the emptiness of her surroundings.
Eventually, the weight of her solitude and depression became unbearable, and she found herself spiraling into a bottomless pit of sorrow that ultimately shattered her spirit.
All of this led her to the edge of her nine-story apartment building, where she stared blearily at the ground far below. Pulling out her pink flip phone, Mitsuko held it out and let it drop. She watched numbly as it fell until it shattered on the ground with a soft crack.
"I can't... do this anymore," Mitsuko whispered, tears welling in her eyes.
Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes and made a small prayer.
"I'm sorry, mother... father. Please forgive me," She whispered and lifted her foot.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" A voice spoke from behind Mitsuko, causing her to gasp and instinctively step away from the ledge.
She spun around and saw a figure in red and white. A figure so famous that she couldn't help but overhear her classmates talk about him during lunch or catch glimpses of him on the news.
"It's you..." Mitsuko muttered as she watched Atomic's white cape flutter in the wind. She shifted back towards the ledge, her legs shaking as she glanced back down at the ground. "Are you here to stop me? To save me? That's what you superheroes do, right?"
Atomic made no move; instead, he turned to look out at the view of the far-off Kyoto sights. "...do you want me to?"
Mitsuko's heart raced as her eyes looked back down at the ground. "I... I don't know."
"I could say that what you're doing isn't the right choice. That it's never that bad. That killing yourself isn't the answer. But I don't know you. I don't know what you've been through," Atomic said softly.
Mitsuko frowned and held her forearm. "Even if I jump... you'll be able to save me, right? You'll take my choice from me, won't you?"
Glancing back at Mitsuko, Atomic shook his head. "I can... But I... I won't save you if you don't want me to."
Mitsuko said nothing; she only continued to stare down below. "Why are you here? Shouldn't you be off stopping evil or saving the world? Why are you wasting your time with someone like me?"
"I'm exactly where I need to be," Atomic said. "And why not you? You matter. You matter just as much as I or anyone else on this planet does."
"That's not true. I'm... I'm just a nobody who was born into a cruel world. A world that took my father from my mother and my little brother. A world where people say cruel things about me or who want to hurt me. I don't have anyone. I'm... alone," Mitsuko said as tears slid down her pale face. "I'm not special. I don't have any positive traits, and I'm not as pretty as the rest of my girls at school. I don't even have anyone to talk to. No friends, no clubmates, no one. But I... I sometimes imagine being special and having someone care about me. I'd be so happy if that were true. But that's all a fantasy... I'm sure you don't understand anything I'm saying. You're famous and beloved by the world. Everything I said is meaningless. I'm... meaningless."
"That's not true. You're not meaningless. No one is," Atomis spoke, his words were heavy with emotion. "I put on this suit every day, not because I want to be famous or to have people talk about me. I put it on to help everyone. Because I believe everyone and everything on this planet is important. That everyone has meaning. And trust me, I can understand what you're saying. I've been through a lot of hard situations as well, so let me tell you. Ending your life is not the answer. It may seem like it, but in the end, you'll be leaving behind a lot of people who will be sad you did what you did."
With a shake of her head, Mitsuko hugged herself and neared the ledge, causing Atomic to stiffen. "That's not true! Nobody would care if I died! No one!"
"What about your mother? Your brother? Wouldn't they be sad?"
Mitsuko blinked, her heart lurching at the thought of her family mourning her loss. Would her mother fall into a depression as well? Would her brother, Ryousuke, be okay? Or would he be scared when he discovers that she threw herself off a building?
"I... I..." Mitsuko muttered, the ache in her heart growing too heavy, causing her to lean forward. "I just want it to stop hurting! Make it stop hurting, please!"
"I can't do that. Only you can," Atomic said as he approached Mitsuko, resting a reassuring hand on her trembling shoulder. "The world we live in isn't a paradise; it's harsh and sometimes cruel, and every day can be a struggle. But we must push on, no matter what. You have to keep moving forward because, in the end, your life is what you make of it. Only you can decide what type of life you will live."
"I can't... I'm not strong enough," Mitsuko whispered.
"Yes, you are... You're much stronger than you think. Trust me," Atomic said as Mitsuko wrapped her arms around him, sobs racking her chest.
Atomic clasped Mitsuko tightly in his arms, the fabric of his cape billowing dramatically in the fierce wind, creating a protective cocoon around her. The sound of the gusts howling around them seemed to fade as he shielded her from the biting chill and the harsh realities of her world.
"Will you... be my friend?" Mitsuko asked, hesitantly. Afraid to hear him say no.
"I would be honored," Atomic said as Mitsuko pulled away. "But I think knowing my friend's name is an important first step, don't you think?"
Mitsuko's heart exploded in happiness as an embarrassed chuckle escaped her lips. "Ah, of course. I'm Honda Mitsuko. But... y-you can call me Mitsuko."
Atomic nodded. "Very well, it's nice to meet you, Mitsuko."
"It's nice to meet you, too, Atomic-san," Mitsuko said with a slight bow.
"Just Atomic is fine. I'm not one for honorifics," Atomic said as he turned to the Kyoto skyline. "Say, Mitsuko... have you ever been flying?"
••o••o••o••
While Mitsuko's pain and depression didn't instantly vanish after her heartfelt conversation with Atomic, his reassuring words and comforting presence served as a crucial stepping stone on her journey toward self-improvement.
On that fateful evening, under a canvas of twilight colors, Atomic used his extraordinary powers to gently lift Mitsuko into the air. With a sense of wonder, she began to soar alongside him, gliding over the enchanting city of Kyoto. They floated together, surrounded by the soft glow of lanterns and the vibrant colors of winter foliage, as if she, too, had powers.
Like a bird liberated from its cage, the exhilarating sensation of flying through the dusky sky filled Mitsuko with joy. She laughed and whooped with glee, a broad smile illuminating her face—a smile she hadn't allowed herself to express in far too long.
The breathtaking views of ancient temples and vibrant cherry blossoms surrounded them, creating a magical backdrop. As they glided above the streets, they took time to savor local delicacies, sharing a snack and laughter as Mitsuko explained several aspects of Kyoto's history and traditions.
Awed onlookers stopped in their tracks, some pulling out their cameras to capture the enchanting scene of a larger-than-life superhero and an average high school girl enjoying some Takoyaki.
The images from that unforgettable evening quickly made headlines, igniting a whirlwind of speculation regarding the nature of Atomic and Mitsuko's relationship.
Social media platforms buzzed with curiosity as people around the world theorized what kind of relationship Atomic may have with what appeared to be a random school girl in Japan.
Several tabloids playfully speculated about the unexpected relationship, weaving together theories that ranged from the possibility of a secret romance to the possibility of Mitsuko being Atomic's sister.
Conversely, other outlets took a more critical stance, denouncing the peculiar pairing of a celebrated public figure and a young girl, raising questions about the authenticity and underlying motives of their connection.
Detractors also scrutinized the legality surrounding Atomic, whose age remained shrouded in mystery, and whether it was appropriate for such a prominent figure to be involved with someone still in high school.
Amidst the swirling opinions, a few voices pondered more generously, suggesting that Atomic may have simply chosen to share an evening with a complete stranger. A possibility that hundreds now wished would happen to them some day.
Yet, for Atomic and Mitsuko, the outside noise of the media became a non factor as they enjoyed the time they spent together.
In the weeks following their meeting, a remarkable transformation unfolded within Mitsuko's school environment after her return.
The once-frequent taunts and bullying that had plagued her diminished immediately; her peers, gripped by an unexpected mix of fear and respect, refrained from targeting her.
Rumors circulated among the students that anyone who dared to cross Mitsuko might invoke the wrath of one of the world's most renowned heroes.
Atomic, who meant when he said that he would be Mitsuko's friend, made it a habit to visit her every few weeks.
Though sometimes brief, these encounters became a beacon of hope in her life. Each time he arrived, he noticed significant changes in her demeanor and appearance—her laughter became more frequent, and a newfound light sparkled in her eyes.
The weight of her previous struggles began to lift as she slowly found her footing and developed a resilient spirit. Finding joy in everyday life and spending more time with her brother and mother.
Eventually, she even found new connections with those who shared her interest in creating manga. A passion that had gotten her ridiculed in the past by her peers.
This evolution was a testament to Mitsuko's steady perseverance and resolve to overcome who she once was, and in turn, it served as a source of inspiration for Atomic as well.
He realized that while he offered her strength, she, too, was empowering him with her courage and tenacity to rise above life's challenges. Mitsuko was proof that anyone could rise above it all and become a better person.
Months later, inside the cozy confines of Mitsuko's clubroom, sunlight streamed through the windows, casting playful shadows across the worn wooden tables. She sat, surrounded by her two friends, friends she made by putting herself out there, each immersed in the creative process as they sketched together. The air was enthusiastic as they collaborated on ideas for a story that had captured Mitsuko's imagination.
Her tale unfolded with a captivating hero—an immigrant from a dying planet, who journeyed across the endless expanse of the cosmos. He was destined to become a beacon of hope, illuminating the path for all on Earth. As Mitsuko immersed herself in her creative process, she meticulously rendered the intricate details of her protagonist's costume.
Her pencil danced across the page, creating flowing lines and vibrant textures that brought the character to life. With each stroke, her eyes sparkled with inspiration, especially when she added the bold "S" emblem emblazoned on his chest—a striking symbol of hope that radiated strength and resilience.
A warm smile spread across her face as she envisioned her hero igniting the dreams and aspirations of countless others, urging them to believe in the extraordinary. As Atomic did for her.
"Superman," Mitsuko said with a warm smile as she remembered the name Atomic had offered her character. "It's perfect."