A soft hand pushed on my shoulder, waking me up. I sat up, still half asleep, before seeing Zeke's face close to mine. I gasped a bit, seeing how close he was. I flopped back in bed, seeing his messy bed head looking down at me. He laughed, seeing how pathetic and dramatic my reaction was.
"Sorry, it's time to get up. I didn't want you to be late." He smiled nicely, pulling out my clothes for me. "Where'd you get these? I don't remember bringing these in." I glanced up at him, chuckling a bit. I tried to be funny, joking with him a bit. Expecting him to smile and be his overall cheery self, I was faced with a new expression. One I didn't think I would see from him. His face was serious; his eyebrows arched a bit while his arms crossed. He stared at me, not saying anything. Clearly, he was still upset about last night. He leaned on the bedpost, staring at me, and then the clothes laid out next to me. I took that as my cue to just put them on and not ask anything or say more. He smiled, satisfied with seeing me getting ready. He then left, stomping towards the bathroom. He didn't close it all the way, leaving it cracked just a bit. What a dumb move. No wonder he got robbed. As I got dressed, I could see Zeke on the phone with someone. He suddenly looked angry, eyebrows drawn together, and he glared at the floor as he leaned back on the sink. I could tell it was something important that was upsetting him.
I finished putting on my jacket before creeping closer to the door. His back was turned away finally, not noticing me at all. I waited a second as he spoke in a low tone. "Yes, I can be there. But I swear this is the last time I'll do this. No more meeting up with you." He sounded angry, holding back from yelling at the other person. "Because I told you! I'm interested in him. I won't be meeting you anymore after this." He hung up, slamming his phone down on the white sink. I flinched, backing up from the door. My heart stopped as he looked back at me, glaring. My eyes widened as he forced his way out of the bathroom. "Enjoy hearing my conversation?" He asked, standing too close for comfort. I shook my head, hoping I didn't give him the wrong idea. "I'm sorry, I just had to use the bathroom. I wasn't trying to peek at you." He scoffed, rubbing his forehead. If I could make it seem like I wasn't trying to listen to his conversation, then maybe... "Sorry, go ahead." He stepped out of the way as I went in. I watched him for a second as he left the bedroom. Leaving me behind.
"Where the hell have you been?" Remy stared at me, annoyed. Goosebumps ran down my neck as I looked up at her. I was already confused about Zeke. I didn't want to tell her about what happened last night. I could already see her flipping out over it, and I hadn't even said a word yet. The awkward silence seemed to get to her as she sighed.
"Seriously. What is with you? I figured you'd be wanting to kill these guys by now. But you're just slacking off." She turned away for a second before looking me in the eyes. She was beyond pissed, and of course, taking it out on me. "Maybe you really aren't cut out for this." Her words left me stunned. All the letters I've been getting telling me how I should do better, the memories of killing people still haunting me, now this? She scoffed, rolling her eyes. "And here I thought I was–"
"Do you ever shut up? I swear to god I'm so done with you." I glared right through her, watching her expression change. I don't normally yell back at her, always allowing her to yell at me or say whatever it is she wants. But I was done with this conversation. I was done with being here. And I was definitely done with these feelings.
"What? You're going to leave now? That just proves my point, you know." She laughed, covering her eyes with her hand as I turned to walk away. I cast a long glance at her before speaking up. "Think what you want to think. Plus, I was busy dealing with the prince last night. But what would you know anyway? All you do is cower away from people." She froze, her eyes wide. It was like a shock for her, hearing the words spill out of my mouth. Back at the Kingdom of Yales, there was never a moment I wasn't with someone. Either for a one-night stand or dating someone to pass the time. It was never a surprise to hear I was hooking up with another guy. I could see the pure shock in her face as I didn't tell her everything about last night.
"And what? You can't get any details on anyone, right? You can't even get close with anyone, let alone get information. I think that's more pathetic than me right now, Remy. Although it explains a lot since nobody likes being around a stuck-up bitch anyways." My words stung, a written expression on her face that I could read so easily. I walked away, my hands in my pockets. I didn't want to turn back to her. Her hurt flashed across her face, sharp enough that it should have pierced me. Instead, I felt hollow. Maybe it was the exhaustion, or maybe I'd already started building walls so high I couldn't even feel her on the other side.
She was hurt, and yet I couldn't care less right now. She was all I have as family, and a feeling of instant regret washed through me. I said what I said though, and I walked away. The feeling of hating myself ran closer and closer towards me. I could never escape it.
That night was almost two weeks ago. Remy was off doing her own thing now, trying to get more details on the King's whereabouts and their plans for the attack on Yales. I, on the other hand, found myself spending more and more time with Zeke. I figured he'd be much more relaxed around me with all the time we've spent together. There was never a moment when I wasn't next to him. Whether I was on patrol and he'd stop by to say hello or he'd ask me to join him for some more of that awful tea. But he never let his guard down around me. After the bathroom incident along with the breaking in, I couldn't blame him either.
"I heard you have a friend. What was her name again? Remy?" He asked, not looking up from his old antique book of who knows what. Most of his things were like that, and he loved to show off his old collectibles like gold treasure. He was always seen with a book in his hand. Either that or a gun and cigarette. How he knew Remy was all the more alarming to me, sounding sirens in my head. I sighed, rubbing my forehead a bit. And just when I thought I could forget about her..
"Yes, she's my best friend. She's also a new recruit here." He chuckled a bit, still not giving me a look. "I see. Each of your parents must be proud of having their kids working for such a powerful family." I scoffed, taking another sip of peach tea. The tea was growing on me though, and so was Zeke. "Yeah, I guess. To be honest, I miss them, but I'd rather be here. At least their bank accounts are full because of me." I could feel him staring at me as he quietly sent his book down face down. I turned to look back up at him, seeing the confusion on his handsome face. "Really?" He asked. I paused for a minute. A slight frown was planted on his face. He seemed so interested now. Like a small boy asking questions out of pure, genuine curiosity. He looked to have no ill intentions.
"Yea. My family was never close to each other anyway. We've just been living together, but we don't exactly spend time together. You know? And now me and Remy are fighting. To be honest though, I'm the one who messed up." He nodded, still looking at me. He'll be dead soon. It wouldn't hurt to tell him anything now. "She may be my best friend, but she's like family to me too. I don't want to lose her, but sometimes it's hard to admit things we're not proud of." I mentioned, giving him a slight smile. Ok, maybe don't tell him everything I decided.
"I'm so sorry." I jerked up, looking at him. My heart stopped, seeing a single tear slide down his chin. Was he actually crying?
"Don't cry! Look, it's not that bad, I promise." Suddenly, he got up out of his chair before walking towards me. He reached out, wrapping his arms around me. My heartbeat quickened. I was almost expecting for it to explode any second now, but that never happened, nor did the feeling leave. He sighed deep in my shoulder, sending a shiver down my back and spine. "If it makes you feel any better... My family is also falling apart." I hesitated, not knowing what to say. His arms wrapped around me tighter, holding me close. I gasped, suddenly in his arms as he picked me up.
"Wait a minute." He sat down on his bed, still holding me bridal style. I didn't resist though as he laid down, pulling me along with him. Here I was, laying on his chest, hearing his heart beating wildly as he messed with my tied-up hair. I knew better than to resist, even if it was the first thing I wanted to do. He messed with my split ends, running his thick fingers through the end of my hair. He took a deep breath in before holding it for a few seconds.
"My mother is more of a slut than anyone I've ever met. I despise her so much." I couldn't help but feel surprised by his words. I never imagined a prince would call his own mother, let alone a queen, that. He whispered in my ear, softly stroking my head. His heart was pounding as I just laid there on top of him. In a strange way, it was comforting. I figured I'd hate it, but... I don't. It was all so new to me. Having someone run their hands through my hair, whispering comforting words in my ear while holding me. I didn't want it to end.
"I would kill her if I could honestly." His words were harsh, while his touch was soft. He acts as if his family life is fine... and yet it was anything but. Of course, he didn't have much of a choice either. Everyone looked up to the Royal Family, some even describing them as gods in their eyes. How could he ever be truthful when everyone viewed him as their savior?
"Have you told anyone? I mean, other than me?" I asked him, craning my neck to look up at him. He shook his head, smirking a bit. "You're the first. I don't tell people this since I don't trust most people. Either they'll use this against me or they'll pity me. I don't care for either." I sat up and rolled over, slowly flopping back down on the bed beside him. "So? Why me? You think I wouldn't do the same?" I asked, grinning at him. His face was twisted into a smile. He placed his hand on his stomach; I was watching it rise and fall with each breath he took.
"Yea. I don't think you would. If you wanted to, you could've done it days ago when I let you sleep next to me. Imagine what people would've thought, and yet you didn't say a single word. Although it's kind of obvious now." He smiled, turning to face me, his face close to mine. The smell of peaches was still on him, along with his usual minty scent. It felt normal being with him like this. As if we knew each other our whole lives, just like two best friends sitting in each other's rooms, sharing stories and secrets.
Maybe it was because no one besides Remy had ever treated me with this kind of care, but the warmth in my chest was undeniable. I hated it. I needed to hate it. But it stayed there anyway, quietly defying me.
"Anyways, I hope you figure it out with your family. Although your friend seems a little stuck up, it might be hard coming to terms with her." He chuckled. "You speak from experience?" I asked, sitting up. He rolled his eyes and smirked as I slowly got up. "Maybe. You know how Gia is. Such a pain." He joked. I nodded, recalling the very moment I met her. I sighed, glancing at the wooden antique clock beside his bed. "It's getting late, so I should go back. Don't want General Ramani on my ass first thing in the morning." I said, not even having met the man, but I didn't want him yelling at me first thing in the morning. He sprang out of bed, almost falling face first into the floor.
"Really? So soon? I mean, I can always talk with him, and you can stay here for a bit if you like." I grinned, hiding it with my hand before shaking my head. "Nah, I don't want to bother you. Plus, shouldn't you be worried about other things? Seems pretty tense with all the meetings and stuff." I glanced back at him, seeing his whole face change. At first, he seemed desperate for me to stay, but now he didn't say a single word.
He nodded finally, turning his back to me. I could easily kill him now with his back turned to me. It could end so quickly too. I'm sure Remy would have no issue with killing Gia while I'm here; she's been dying to. But the words from Zeke kept repeating over and over. "Yea. I don't think you would." It's incredible how this man thinks I'm so amazing and innocent. I turned back to leave; I couldn't stand this guy. He's so trusting of me. So trusting that he tells me things he's never told anyone else before. He's so clingy too; no matter who's around, he's always next to me or following me. But I don't think I hate him as much as I hate myself right now.
"Val?" I jolted, snapping out of my own thoughts. "Yes?" I called, glancing over at his bed. There he was, lying there with his shirt off, getting ready to change into pajamas. I quickly turned back, embarrassed by what I just saw. Zeke, on the other hand, didn't seem to mind one bit.
"You'll be back, right?" His voice sounded so enthusiastic before. Now it was shaking, like he was about to cry or worried I'd never come back. For a moment, I considered leaving without saying a word.
But… I couldn't do it. Because in the end, I would do the same. I lost count of the times I begged others to stay with me. How could I do the same? "Of course. Have a good night." I smiled back at him, opening his bedroom door. I slowly began to close it, hoping for it to make as little noise as possible. Suddenly a faint voice called out again. "Goodnight, Val." A warm smile stretched across my face before the door finally closed.