It was the worst moment of my life.
Zaara still held me, her breath shaky against my ear.
I couldn't speak. My voice felt ripped from me, as if Carter had carried it away when he waved goodbye.
I stared over her shoulder. The main room looked sterile and harsh under the fluorescent lights. It was colder too.
All around us, contestants began shifting uneasily, looking broken.
Zaara finally pulled back, just enough to search my face. Her cheeks were slick with tears.
"Vincent," she said softly, brushing sweat-damp hair off my forehead. "Listen to me. Carter made his choice because he believed in you. Don't let them break you now."
My throat tightened painfully. "He should be here. He deserved…"
"I know." Her voice cracked. "I know he did. But if you give up now, everything he did… everything we've all lost… it'll mean nothing."
She held my face in her trembling hands. "One breath at a time. Remember?"
I tried. I inhaled. My chest felt like it was collapsing.