Chapter 321: The Delicious Food Discovered by Myrtle
Hermione and Luna were at it again—arguing in the middle of the Great Hall—and Alexander wasn't surprised in the slightest.
Hermione, after all, was a rational witch. The kind who trusted books more than anything else. Yes, Alexander had trained her and broadened her understanding of magic far beyond what textbooks covered—but at her core, she was still someone who replaced one source of "absolute truth" with another. She no longer blindly worshipped books; she blindly trusted his magical theories instead.
Luna, on the other hand, was the complete opposite—sentimental, dreamy, and capable of believing in creatures and magical concepts that no textbook would ever acknowledge. In truth, she was closer to what an old-era wizard was supposed to be: a reality-bender whose imagination shaped magic itself.
Hermione and Luna were destined to clash; their values came from two entirely different worlds. And Alexander knew very well that this entire argument came from something he said earlier.
He watched them bicker, sighing internally.
Why can't they get along peacefully like Penelope and Kate?
Alexander briefly considered letting Hermione and Luna into his mind-world, giving them something else to focus on so they'd stop quarrelling. But he quickly rejected the idea.
Doing that meant he'd have to allocate more mental resources. In terms of raw capacity, it was nothing—just a drop in the ocean for him—but the constant attention required would drain far more mental energy.
And more importantly…
He would have to actively interact with four girls simultaneously.
Yes, that was pleasant in one sense. But Alexander had learned from experience.
Back when he was younger and much more naïve, he revealed far too much of his mind-realm to Kate and Penelope. As a result, since the start of the school year, both girls had been dwelling inside his mind-world most of the time. Their bodies operated normally thanks to subconscious processing—both their own and Alexander's.
This was also why neither Kate nor Penelope ever complained about Alexander's "philandering" tendencies.
From their perspective, he had been with them 24 hours a day.
As Alexander contemplated this, he suddenly felt a wave of… gloating?
He turned and immediately saw the source.
It was Harry Potter, happily chatting with Nearly Headless Nick.
Alexander blinked.
Then sighed.
Maybe I'm too kind.
While Harry happily discussed the Deathday Banquet, he was blissfully unaware that he would soon face tonight's inevitable nightmare—
Moaning Myrtle.
Myrtle's Internal Monologue
My name is Myrtle Elizabeth Warren—yes, that Myrtle. A Muggle-born witch.
Both my parents were Muggles, but that didn't stop me from being brilliant. When I was young, before puberty ruined everything, I wasn't wearing thick glasses from reading under the covers…
I wasn't covered in acne…
And everyone liked me.
Then, on my eleventh birthday, everything changed—I learned I was a witch!
I could do magic! I finally understood why I never got fat even though I ate so much!
(That was magic, right? It had to be.)
But once I entered Hogwarts… everything fell apart.
I was sorted into Ravenclaw—naturally—and immediately met my lifelong tormentor, Olive Hornby, who targeted me for absolutely no reason.
Surrounded by brilliant students, my pride vanished.
I overate from stress.
I studied until my face exploded with acne.
I wore thick glasses.
Olive became even worse, getting others to exclude me too.
So, as I always did, I hid in the second-floor bathroom to cry.
Then one day… I heard someone speaking another language. A boy. In the girls' bathroom!
I opened the stall door to yell at him—
And died instantly.
All I remember are huge yellow eyes staring at me.
No one cared how I died. No one even asked.
It was Olive Hornby who found my body—she knew I was always there!
I'll never forget her terrified face when she saw me floating above my own corpse. That was the second happiest moment of my afterlife.
Afterward, I visited my parents to assure them I was still "alive."
Then came the happiest period of my ghostly existence:
I haunted Olive Hornby relentlessly.
I went to her brother's wedding!
I made her life miserable!
She deserved every moment.
Unfortunately, she reported me to the Ministry, and I was forced to stay in Hogwarts forever.
Since then, my life as a ghost has been miserable.
I couldn't even binge-eat to vent my sadness.
When Peeves called me fat and ugly again, I even considered… well, I was already dead, so that didn't work.
And thus, I became Moaning Myrtle.
I thought my existence would remain dull and miserable forever.
But today…
Today something miraculous happened.
I can eat again!
Food, real food—well, ghost food—passes through me in delightful waves! I even left my bathroom cubicle (third floor, second stall from the left—my territory).
But then—oh, then—something even better appeared in the Great Hall:
Harry Potter.
Delicious.
Wonderful.
Better than any ghost food.
I must have him.
(End of Chapter)
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