Just as Valentine was meeting Lucy and planning to meet Scroogeux, a few things were happening.
Firstly, Zhang Lu was still writing his manifesto. He had now amassed hundreds of thousands of readers who were eagerly awaiting the latest installment of Hairy Pee.
Sally was thinking about contacting Valentine to discuss the possibility of merging their technology.
And Old Man Li had informed Bob about an important matter that had arisen, concerning the Association of Rizzmasters.
This was, in fact, an urgent request from none other than the Touchmasters, who were asking for their assistance!
Indeed.
After a protracted siege at the Touchmasters' Mountain Gates in Touching Point, the Politically Correct Movement, led by the nefarious Captain Karen Killjoy, had finally edged the Touchmasters towards the brink... of a climactic defeat!
Touchmasters were now an endangered species, sent scurrying by countless complaints, lawsuits... at this point, even a simple handshake now ran the risk of coming across too strong, without the proper consensual protocols.
In desperation, the Touchmasters had turned to their old friends and allies, the Rizzmasters, for a much needed 'helping hand', although not of the usual variety.
Calling upon the sacred bonds of brotherhood cultivated from the earlier chapter [Chapter 31], the Association of Rizzmasters accordingly requested that all available Rizzmasters should… come as quickly as possible, in order to decrease the… mounting tensions.
Of course, now that Bob was a provisional candidate Rizzmaster, he was also able to answer the call to help...!!!
At last, after his years of training, were his abilities about to be put to the test?!?!
___
The Association of Rizzmasters was an elite network of those who had dedicated themselves to the ways of Rizz.
Bob at first had been quite excited…
until Old Man Li revealed that the Association was in fact simply an e-network, comprised of a primary server on D*cksword, hosted by a mysterious leader known only by his handle, Max O' Scooru and his title as "Sovereign", which apparently was an indication of his 'Supreme Grand Rizzmaster' level…
Right now, Old Man Lu was showing him a message that had been tagged @everyone…
Max O' Scooru (Sovereign):
Dear Rizzmasters… the Touchmasters need our help! 🔥✨
Please react to this message to show your support and sign the petition using the link below
freethetouchmasters.pls
1743😎3232🔥784🙄2357💯5459✨
1782💥764🌊69🍑69🍆69🍉69🍌
6969😂
Bob was speechless, as Old Man Li quickly filled him in on the situation…
___
The 'Mountain Gate' of the Touchmasters (this was the name of their online server apparently) had been spammed with endless messages from the myriad minions of Karen Killjoy, who had amassed a huge following known as the "Solid In My Pants Society", or SIMPS for short, due to many years of aura farming as an attractive woman online promoting her entitled, intolerant and uptight views alongside smatterings and sprinklings of affection via a skilled assortment of gifs and emojis that kept her thirsty army coming back for more!!!
*1 week prior to the attack… *
Admin Chat Logs taken from the Politically Correct Movement Server …
Karen Killjoy (Captain and Leader of the Politically Correct Movement): My wonderful SIMPS*insincere heart emojis*~~ you'll never guess what happened today😱🥀...
SIMPS Member 247: What my queen?!?! *concerned emoji*
Karen Killjoy (KK): N-no… I suppose it's nothing. I-I shouldn't make a fuss … *sad gif*
SIMP Member 365: "Tell us… who dared to make our queen Karen sad?!?!"
KK: Oh all right, if you insist… Well it was a Touchmaster…
he… h-he laugh-reacted on one of my messages I posted in the general chat…
It made me feel… unsafe… 😞😔
SIMP 247365: *sharp intake of breath* No…!!!!
:righteousindignation: :unacceptable!!!:
KK: "I'm afraid it's true…"
SIMPS in unison: "We can't let this affront, this insult go unpunished. SIMPS…!!!!!! Let's rise!!!!!!"
"Teach those Touchmasters a lesson!!!"
"Yeah!!!!"
KK: "Oh, oh, b-be careful!!!!"
"Anything for your heart-react, my queen!!!!"
Ever since that day, the SIMPS had begun spamming the Touchmaster chat with angry gifs and emoticons.
"You should be ashamed of yourselves!!!
"You better think twice before Laugh-reacting on our stunning and brave queen Karen's posts again!!!"
Of course, the Touchmasters initially didn't
take what they perceived to be these clowns seriously, and immediately spammed laugh reacts on all of Karen Killjoy's posts, which became a source of immense entertainment for many, and a widely clipped phenomenon which went viral online.
However, it then appeared that the SIMPS had had the last laugh-react.
That's right. In their typical Karen-influenced ways, the SIMPS mass-reported the Touchmasters to the moderators on every site!!!!!
Initially, to be fair, the moderators didn't care, but after their inboxes became flooded with complaints from Karen's SIMPS army, they had no choice but to relent in order to get some peace and quiet, and the Touchmasters were served with a provisional 6 month ban on laughreacting!!!!
In dire straits, Touchmasters had reached out to the Rizzmasters, hoping that with their Rizz, they might be able to have a chat with the powers that be, the censors, and the mods to reverse the ban.
The Touchmasters were led by their Leader, known as Phil Veri Goode, who had allegedly hoisted himself to the highest heights of Touchmastery and was now better known by his (in)famous technique, "Ten Thousand Fingers" or TTF or short.
Phil "TTF" Veri Goode was unparalleled in The Art of Touch, but because the assault had occurred online, his true abilities were unable to be fully utilized, leading to the Touchmaster's online suppression.
"So yeah, bro, my hands are tied…" Phil explained the situation and messaged Max O' Scooru (Sovereign) with a *fed up* emoji.
"…You may be losing your touch, old sport." 'Max' replied.
"Touché," Phil replied glumly.
"Don't worry, we'll try to feel out the situation on your behalf... "
"…"
And so, this had led to the message to the Rizzmasters, the petition, followed by a call to arms.
Apparently, they were to sweet-talk the mods, explain how unreasonable the [Politically Correct Movement] were being, and reverse the ban on the Touchmasters!!!
Max O' Scooru (Sovereign): Dear Rizzmasters…
Time to sharpen up your emoji and gif game…
Some old friends need our help!!!
In this moment of crisis, shall we cower?!?!
…Or shall we instead, channel our special power… ?!!!
"… That's right. It's time… for us to channel… the power of Rizz!!!!"
And so began the RizzMaster's counter-Karen-campaign.
Armed with flawless 7G internet connection, and an arsenal of carefully curated signature emojis and gifs, the Rizzmasters plunged and thrusted into DMs, online convos, and general chats with Rizzian relish!!!