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Chapter 40 - Chapter 39: No Denial

I can't fight it anymore.

Liana

I was back at Alex's place in the afternoon.

She'd already left for work.

A note on the counter said,

Eat something. Call me if Elias tries to kill someone today.

I smiled. Barely.

But the smile didn't last.

Because as I stared at the mug in my hand, a different memory slipped in.

The warmth of his jacket.

The curve of his arm, steady against my cheek.

The way I'd leaned into him like I belonged there.

Like it was safe.

Like it was normal.

I touched my necklace.

The one with the hidden tracker.

I wore it every day.

But yesterday was the first time I'd felt it burn—not from heat, but from awareness.

He held me. And he didn't pull away.

I didn't dream it.

He was there. Solid. Quiet.

His hands gentle as he wiped my face, tucked the blanket closer, whispered,

"I'm here."

I wanted to stay.

I wanted him to touch me again.

I wanted—

God.

I buried my face in my hands.

What was I doing?

His voice.

His warmth.

His presence.

It used to mean protection, just safety.

But now it meant something else, more.

I didn't know when that changed.

Maybe during that night on the couch.

Maybe the first time I saw him look angry when another man talked to me.

Maybe even earlier.

But now...

I couldn't lie to myself anymore.

This wasn't just comfort. Or gratitude. Or the relief of having someone I trusted.

This was—

I want him.

The words echoed like a scream in a cathedral.

I pressed a hand to my chest.

My heart felt loud. Too loud.

What am I supposed to do with that?

I thought of Scott again—

Her confident hands, her easy laugh, the way she walked into his space like she belonged there.

I couldn't do that.

I wouldn't know how.

He kissed people like her.

Not me.

And still—

I remembered the way he looked at me in the hospital.

Not like I was fragile.

Not like I was his responsibility.

Like I mattered.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it.

Maybe I'm just desperate to be wanted.

But even if that were true—

It didn't change the fact.

I like him.

Not in a childish, distant way.

Not as a father figure.

Not as a hero.

But as a man.

As Elias.

And I didn't know whether to run from that—

Or fall into it completely.

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