Chapter 40: Re: Starting a Life of Oboreru from Zero - End
[["Representative of the 'Pleiades,' 'Purge King' Natsuki Subaru, including Roswaal L. Mathers, former Margrave of the Frontier, and other Kingdom soldiers, along with subjects of the Vollachia Empire, the Kararagi City-State, and the Gusteko Kingdom, have killed a total of one hundred twenty-six thousand seven hundred and two people. The number of those who directly committed the acts alone reaches this number, and adding those indirectly involved, those who suffered harm other than death, this number only increases. It's truly difficult to turn a blind eye."]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Disregarding human life like grass..."
Julius clicked his tongue in anger.
"One hundred twenty-six thousand seven hundred and two people..."
Emilia covered her mouth, softly uttering the number of deaths.
"This... is not my knight, I don't want a Subaru like this!"
Emilia shouted inwardly.
Enough already, don't follow that person anymore.
His story is pitiable, but even so, such demonic acts are intolerable.
No, that's not right.
I need to reform this Subaru.
If that doesn't work, I must redeem him and return him to the boy he was at the beginning.
No matter what, he is still Subaru, the Subaru who saved me, the Subaru who risked his life for me.
However, since I learned of Subaru's extreme violence, I would probably give up on this Subaru, right...
And yet—
[["—I'm sorry, Reinhard. Even so, I still cherish Subaru."
"—'Sword Saint Family,' Reinhard van Astrea."
Reinhard solemnly declared his name, announcing their current adversarial relationship.
Then he raised the Dragon Sword.
"My name is Emilia. Just call me Emilia."
Pack and Emilia officially began their battle with Reinhard.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"This~ Emilia-sama here has not undergone the trials, her mind~ is immature. Moreover, she lost in the Royal Selection, was imprisoned, and believes~ that besides Subaru and Pack~, no one needs her anymore. Besides Pack~, Subaru is her only one now..."
Roswaal analyzed.
"...This me is really... terrible."
Emilia looked at that version of herself with hatred, or rather, she hated that immature self from the past.
Roswaal is right. My version of that world doesn't want to change Subaru, doesn't want to redeem Subaru, but because Subaru needs her, she "cherishes" him even if he is like this.
[["A well-deserved ending, a well-deserved death, huh..."
The scene shifted again, back to black and white, and Subaru slowly advanced down the corridor, clutching his left abdominal wound.
He seemed somewhat anxious, as if unwilling to die like this.
"—Subaru."
"Ugh!"
A wounded Emilia suddenly appeared and hugged Subaru.
Emilia's arrival brought color back to the scene.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
Cecilus' voice was a mix of fury and disbelief.
"We won... the princess really won... Damn it, you bastard! To die at the hands of the boss's 'lover' instead of mine! This is so wrong, right? No, not really, a monster like you might not really be dead... but thinking about it still makes me so angry!"
Cecilus was very unhappy about Reinhard's suspected death, glaring at him.
Reinhard apologetically expressed his regret.
"But even wounded, Reinhard is still the 'Sword Saint.' How in the world did Emilia-sama pull that off?"
Otto, meanwhile, rubbed his temples, utterly baffled.
Puck's ears twitched, his usual playful tone replaced by something darker.
"Well…"
[["—But, why? And, what's with this wound?"
Subaru seemed puzzled as to why she was here and how she got her wound.
"—It's okay, really, nothing happened. Everything is fine."
"What is Puck doing..."
"Puck... never mind, we'll talk about that later. Don't worry about it now... Subaru, let's escape together. No one will come after us now."]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Just as I guessed... I'll hold them off, and let Lia escape..."
Puck thought.
Abandoning Puck to follow a Subaru like this...
Emilia couldn't help but tremble.
[["I was very angry with Subaru, suddenly wanting to imprison me. But, that was just at the beginning... Later, I felt like I was constantly being helped by Subaru. Because Subaru needed me, I felt like Subaru acknowledged this self-abandoned me that no one wanted, so... I want to be with Subaru. So, let's escape together?"
Emilia, in the scene, requested that Subaru to escape together.
"...Hearing you say that makes me very happy. But... everyone around us wants to kill me, so—I'm going to die here."
"—Then, I'll die with you."
Subaru was stunned.
"I'll die with you. I don't want to stay in a place where I'm not needed. Please, Subaru. I need you. I want you to be with me."
Emilia grabbed Subaru's chest like a confession, leaning in to breathe on him.
"That... um, the reason they want to kill me is because I killed a lot of people... did a lot of bad things..."
"That kind of thing doesn't matter at all. As long as I can be with you..."
"Uh..."
"Subaru?"
"Liar... No, don't do this, please don't do this. Why, to me, at this point, why! Don't do this! Don't do this, don't do this, don't give me this!!"
Subaru looked at Emilia with extreme fear.
"Aaaaaaaaaah!!"
Subaru pushed Emilia away and shouted loudly:
"Hate me! It's fine to hate me! Just leave me alone!"
At this moment, even Emilia gradually turned black and white.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"What's wrong with Subaru!?"
Emilia, outside the scene, was very shocked.
"Even she doesn't have any color anymore... Subaru believes that after learning of his violence, Emilia should hate him and stay away from him... but Emilia here still accepts him. The Emilia in Subaru's eyes has changed; she can't be trusted anymore. And when everyone is untrustworthy... all that's left is to collapse. I suppose"
Beatrice sadly guessed the reason.
[["Don't be gentle to me...! Anyway, everyone hates me, right? Everyone suspects me, right? They think I'm annoying, they want to kill me, hate me, curse me, betray me, right!? Then, just hate me from the beginning! Don't change your mind, wouldn't it be nice to just keep going like this! If you keep hating me, nothing will happen. If you keep hating me, don't change..."
Anger.
Subaru looked extremely angry.
He roared.
"Anyway, you're going to betray me sooner or later, so don't pretend to love me!!"
Subaru collapsed and abandoned Emilia, running forward madly, completely disregarding his injuries.
Leaving behind the insane Emilia's wails.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Subaru-kun..."
Rem recalled the reincarnation where she doubted him again.
Subaru-kun could become like this because of my distrust...
"Sister?"
Ram noticed both Rem's guilt again, looked at them, and said:
"We are not responsible, we did not do such a thing."
"Eh? Sister, what are you talking about... clearly..."
"Ram asks you, have you done those things? That is, suspected Barusu, abused Barusu."
"Rem did suspect..."
Natsuki Rem said, and Rem also nodded.
"So the misunderstanding was resolved later?"
"..."
"Answer me Rem."
"It was resolved."
Ram smiled upon hearing this:
"And there was no so-called abuse of Barusu, right?"
"Yeah."
"So we didn't do those things at all, it has nothing to do with us. The ones who are really wrong are those versions of us. But since there was such behavior in those timelines, it means that we could have done that, right? So what we need to do is to judge carefully and avoid such behavior again."
Ram paused, then spoke again:
"To use a not-so-appropriate analogy. We are potential criminals; those versions of us in those timelines are real criminals, they are responsible, we are not responsible. Nevertheless, we must strive to avoid committing crimes. And Barusu is the victim. We can try to care more about the victim, but we are not the perpetrators."
"...Yes, Sister, Rem will think about it carefully."
Both Rems said in unison.
That strange feeling, that is, it is inappropriate to blame Subaru, it is inappropriate to blame ourselves, and it is too inappropriate to blame ourselves in the reincarnation, although it also troubled Ram, but Ram now gave the answer.
"According to Natsuki's words, this Natsuki pursues consistency in attitude, right? Either hate all the time, or love all the time. Like the maid sisters in the reincarnation, one second they are laughing and joking, and the next second they want to kill him... Alas, they are really driving him crazy. It feels like they are more problematic than that 'Pride Archbishop' Subaru."
Anastasia sighed.
Then—
Ram looked at the scene with extreme surprise:
"Isn't Ram already dead!?"
[[In the scene, Subaru opened an iron door, and in front of him was Ram, who was locked up with iron chains.
Moreover, Ram was not black and white.
She was still the same, but there were some differences:
Her mental state had deteriorated.
And it seemed that because she had been unattended for a long time, Ram's hair and nails were very long.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Is this world... going to end like this?"
Ram whispered.
She already knew what Subaru wanted to do.
"Wait, wait! It seems that Natsuki-san's memories have appeared!"
Otto exclaimed.
[[Rustle, rustle. The scene changed again, and the sound of stepping on snow rang out.
Natsuki Subaru carried Ram step by step.
Fragments were displayed in the form of a revolving lantern.
"Why did Ram decline?"
Natsuki Subaru shouted in countless reincarnations.
Then...
"So Ram overused her horn to kill me, so her magic power... or is it called soul power? Whatever, it's constantly being consumed uncontrollably... That's right, magic ore, magic ore can save her."
After finding a way to save Ram, Subaru looked very happy.
He imprisoned Ram and regularly gave her food and magic ore to replenish her magic power.
And so, until the arrival of Reinhard.
The revolving lantern ended.]]
.....
~Inside, the Theater~
"Barusu didn't kill me, but saved me instead!?"
Ram's pink eyes were trembling, and her body was shaking slightly.
"To go to this extent... why..."
Why...
Ram looked at Roswaal.
A voice from the depths of her heart knocked on her heart—
Why... did Ram meet Roswaal-sama first...
She would not let anyone know the words that this voice uttered.
[[Subaru slowly walked to Ram.
"—Finally, have you had thoughts of seeking death, Barusu?"
Ram put her hand on Subaru's neck, and Subaru did not resist.
And so, the Purge King, Natsuki Subaru, died.
The screen began to darken.]]